And then all thoughts of him ignoring me disappear. He’s kissing me with a strange kind of desperation - strange because he’s always so in control, but right now I know he’s losing it - and his rhythm has picked up.
Our tongues tangle together and his hot breath washes over me as he’s grinding his body into mine.
I’ve lost touch with reality. Reality sucks anyway, so I welcome this oblivion with open arms. I’m going to stay here in this giant cloud of slowly building heat for hours and hours and hours. Maybe days. It’s nice here. It’s hot here. It’s … it’s … Oh shit.
I grip Rebel around his muscled back with every ounce of strength I have left, as waves of orgasmic pulses surge through the place where we’re connected and sliding together. Words of pure abandon fly out of my mouth too fast for me to stop them. “Aaaahhhhh, Rebeeelllllll!”
I’m blindsided by the rush of emotion and sensations that are coming from my core. Bucking up against him, I’m completely out of control. Only one thing is driving me now; I just need to get this feeling out of me and save myself from drowning in madness.
He grunts and his body starts jerking over me. His dick pulses as he comes. He pushes into me and I lose whatever was left of my sanity.
Something inside me snaps and I fall over the precipice. I can’t think straight or reason or even care about what’s happening anymore. I scream over and over, riding wave after wave of orgasm until my entire body is just one big empty shell.
When he finally goes still against me and my hips stop jerking around in an effort to rid myself of the energy Rebel created inside me, I begin to cry. I have no idea why, because I’m the farthest thing from sad a girl could possibly be, but that doesn’t stop the great big sobs from wracking my body.
Rebel rains small kisses down all over my face. My entire body trembles as he holds me tight and murmurs nothing that makes any sense in my ear.
I don’t know how long it takes me to calm down, but it feels like forever. When I’ve finally gotten a grip on my ridiculous reaction, Rebel stops the kissing parade.
“You okay?” he asks, still hovering over me.
“Yeah,” I say, hiccuping. “Just a little devastated, that’s all. Don’t mind me.” I use the back of my hand to wipe the tears from the side of my face.
I can tell by the tone of his voice that he’s smiling. “You liked it.”
I reach around and pinch his bare butt. “Shut up.” My face burns red.
He leans down and licks my earlobe, his words tickling the delicate hairs on my neck and ear. “Say it.”
I squirm underneath him, feeling both embarrassed and frisky over his challenge. “No.”
He pushes into me, and it’s then that I realize he’s getting hard again.
“Yessss …,” he whispers, kissing my neck and then nipping it.
I put my hands on his chest and push. With every ounce of strength I have, I only manage to move him about an inch. I’m not exactly panicked, but I feel like I’m out of my league. “You’re getting hard again!” My voice sounds like a cartoon character’s, it’s so high.
He pushes into me again. “Is that a problem? I thought you liked it last time.” His tone is cocky, turning me on all over again.
I squirm to get away, but all that does is brush my sensitive parts up against his body and remind me how much he’s filling me right now. It has the opposite effect it probably should; instead of wanting to get away from him, I want to go for round two.
“You need another condom,” I say, my breath coming out a little too fast. This is my brain’s last-ditch effort to walk away with any pride intact. If he keeps pushing my buttons, I’m liable to beg.
He grunts and without warning, quickly pulls out of me, and flops over onto his back. He’s rolling over and off the bed, reaching into his side table before I realize what’s going on.
The cold air on my sweaty body wakes me up out of my sex-stupor. Panic seizes me as I realize what we’ve just done. I’m exposed. Out there. Lying on sweaty sheets below my boss. My boss! Gah, and I cried like a lunatic too!
I roll over and scramble for the edge of the bed. I almost make my escape too, but then the bed bounces me up and the giant beast’s hands are on me, dragging me back.
“Ahhhh!” I squeal, wiggling around, unable to get enough leverage to push him off me.
“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks.
I laugh loudly, either out of joy or panic, I’m not sure. I wasn’t expecting to hear that playful tone in his voice, so it’s thrown me off. I don’t know which end of my world is up anymore. Stay or go? Fuck or run? Quick! Decide!
“Go away!” I yell, pushing on him.
He crawls up higher on my body and nuzzles my neck, pinning me to the bed and completely ignoring my freak-out. “No.” Bite, nibble, lick. “I want to make love to you again.”
Goosebumps break out all over my skin as his hot breath crawls over my neck. “Make love?” I say, giggling. All the struggle and fight flees my body and my mind. How can I possibly think about leaving this guy right now? I might be stupid, but I’m not epic stupid.
“What’s so funny?” He moves down to kiss my breasts. Delicate licks mixed with cool air make them tingle.
My response isn’t very firm; there’s too much breathlessness mixed in with the words to give them any oomph. “I’ve never been made love to before, ever. That’s like … old school.”
“Oh yeah?” He slides down lower, kissing my belly. “You calling me old?”
“No … don’t be ridic … what are you doing?” I ask, placing my hands on the sides of his head, trying but failing to keep my hips still. My pulse quickens and my breath is coming in shallow gasps. His mouth is only inches from my most sensitive spot. Oh, God.
His hair is spiky and his head is as hard as a rock, but he’s using only the softest of touches to light my body on fire all over again. The difference between the hard and the soft and the knowledge that this giant beast of a man can be so dangerous but gentle is intoxicating.
“I guess I’m going to make love to you for the first time in your life.” And then his lips and tongue are between my legs and I’m moaning loudly.
My hands are still on his head and I can feel him moving between my legs. It’s too much. Too much. My hips roll and buck as tiny sensations spark up into me from where his mouth is moving. My reaction is uncontrollable. It’s automatic, strong, out of my hands. Not only is it wild, but it’s somehow freeing. I’m no longer afraid or embarrassed about what my body is doing or what my heart is feeling. And I don’t care if the whole damn neighborhood hears me at this point, either. I cannot keep these emotions in check, and I don’t want to try anymore. Just for tonight, just for now, I’m going to let go and live in the moment. Fuck the consequences. I’ll deal with those tomorrow.
I grab the sheets on either side of me and twist them into knots as I cry out his name and fall willingly into the abyss.
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
I’M DOING MY BEST TO stand next to Quin’s family barbecue grill and appear completely unconcerned, but it’s impossible. My boss and hot sexy loverboy is across the lawn talking to one of Quin’s brothers, looking more gorgeous than a man should be allowed to be. I resist the urge to push my boobs up in my bra to better display my meager cleavage.
“Man, you’ve got it bad,” Quin says, sipping a cup of purple punch. Her mom’s mad over making sherbet drinks no matter what the event.
I watch her out of the corner of my eye while also trying to act like I’m not staring at Rebel.
“Hello?” Quin says, giving up on wrangling a floating berry off the surface of her drink with her tongue in favor of harassing me. “Earth to Teagan? Are you in there?”
“What?” I give her my full attention, my vision a little fuzzy at first from shifting focus and too much punch. This murky purple concoction is not a kid’s-birthday-party version. “I’m fine. I’m cool. What’s up?”
She huffs
out annoyed air. “I just told you, like eighteen times … you know that girl in our dorm, Alissa? She’s pregnant. Can you believe that? She’s not saying who the father is.”
I frown, trying to conjure a picture of the girl from my memories. “Alissa?”
“Yeah. She lived across the hall from you for the last year. Alissa.” Quin’s tapping her toe and the sound is making me want to slap her.
I remember the girl now. She’s not the type I would have expected to get preggers out of wedlock. “Oh, yeah. Alissa. Pregnant, huh? Hmmm…” I go back to staring at Rebel. He catches my eye and one side of his mouth goes up just the slightest bit. My heart does a double back flip with a triple axel thrown in for good measure. God, he is so frigging hot. And now I know what he looks like naked … and he had his tongue in my …
Quin’s shrill accusatory tone busts right into my fantasy, shattering it into a million tiny pieces. “Jesus H Christmas on a kabob, you are sick, you know that? Love sick. One orgasm and he owns you. You should be ashamed of yourself.”
I grab her by the arm and drag her behind the grill. “Shut up, would you? You want the whole family to know my business? And for the record, it wasn’t just one orgasm.” I battle to stay serious and stern with her.
She grins like a lion must when it has its prey trapped. “Oh, yeah? More than one? Like how many more? Do tell…”
I roll my eyes, hating that I stepped right into that one. “Lots more. Let’s leave it at that, shall we?”
“More than I can count on one hand or two?”
“It was only one night,” I say, trying to distract her from counting. I try to see Rebel from my new spot on the lawn, but there’s too much smoke coming from the open grill between us.
“There are at least eight hours in a night. With rest in between, you could probably manage …” She rolls her eyes heavenward as she calculates and then drops her gaze to my face. “Five. I’m going with five.” She smiles all devious-like as she waits for my reaction.
I try to keep a straight face, but I can’t. My serious expression crumbles, the shit-eating grin permanently plastered to my stupid face.
“I knew it!” she squeals. “Holy shit, your hootch must be seriously sore.”
I slap her and make her bawk with surprise. She sounds like a deranged chicken and has to dance to the side to keep her spilling punch from staining her dress.
“Ow! That hurt, beast master. Back off.” She rubs her arm and tries to act mad at me.
“Beast master? That’s a new one.” I take a sip of my punch. My glass is mostly empty, but I act like it’s not. I’m a total wienie, hiding behind empty plastic.
She shrugs. “Well, since you’ve managed to tame the beast over there, it seems appropriate.”
I pull the cup away and give up on my charade. I don’t know why I bother to hide from Quin anyway. She always ignores my attempts. “Whatever. Listen, just don’t say anything to anyone. He’s a really private person and so am I and … well, you know what I’m saying.”
She nods slowly, looking off into the distance. “Yeah. I get it. You don’t want all those lame college guys sniffing around once they hear about your mad BJ skills and older man thing. Smart girl. Better to keep it on the down low.”
I smack her again. “Shut up, Quin! I’m serious!”
She’s back to smiling like a fool. “I’m only kidding. Geez, get a funny bone, would ya? Anyway, tell me … was it awesome? It must have been. You look seriously ill with something. Is it love or just serious lust?”
“It must be lust,” I say, staring at him through the smoke. Love would be too much too soon. I’m okay with lust for now. Lust is goooooood. The smell of hamburgers makes my stomach grumble.
Quin’s dad walks over and throws something else on the fire that causes it to sizzle.
As Quin opens her mouth to say something, a giant flame blasts out of the sides of the barbecue. Both of us scream and jump back as more fire comes out in our direction. It’s spewing out of every crack and crevice, and I duck a little, wondering if I’m about to be covered in exploding ‘cue shrapnel.
For some reason the idea of being coated in burns and hamburger bits is humorous. Rebel finds me clinging to Quin near the fence, both of us laughing so hard we have to cross our legs to keep from peeing.
“You okay?” he asks, putting his hand on my upper arm.
His touch sobers me up instantly. “Yeah, I’m good. Just got a little freaked out over the flames almost taking my eyebrows off.”
“Sorry ‘bout that,” Quin’s dad says, peering over the top of the grill. “Little bit of grease in those sausages, I guess.”
“Just a little? Jesus, Dad,” Quin says, combing her hair with her fingers. She scowls when she takes a whiff of one of her curls. “Ugh. Now I smell like burned pig fat. Way to go, Dad.”
“Sorry, princess. Didn’t get ya, did I?” He peers at us through the smoke.
She tosses her hair over her shoulder. “No, I’m fine. I just have to wash my hair again.” She leans in towards me. “Seriously though … do I still have delicately arched, perfectly plucked brows? The kind that make women weep with jealousy and men go sex-crazed for my body?”
I squint as I examine her forehead. “I think you got a few hairs sizzled off, actually.”
One loud Eep! and she’s out of there. I can’t help but laugh all over again.
“That’s cruel,” Rebel says, but he’s smiling too.
“She deserves it. She’s been over here giving me the third degree.” I straighten up, unable to keep from going all light-headed again with his arm sliding around to rest on my waist. My face goes hot with memories.
“About what?”
I roll my eyes, trying to play off my reaction and act like I’m completely cool like him. “What do you think? Stop playing dumb.” I play-push him away and he lets his hand slide off me. I instantly regret my decision to pretend like I didn’t want him there.
“I had a great time with you last night,” he says simply, stunning me with his straight-to-the-point self.
I thought my face couldn’t possibly get redder, but I was wrong. It could actually be purple at this point, considering the amount of sweat that’s pouring down my back. “Me too. With you, I mean. I had fun with you.” Gah! Not cool! Get it together!
“Want to do it again?” he asks.
I laugh at his boldness. Before I thought he was shy, but I was wrong. There’s a big difference between being timid and being very selective with words. And there’s definitely something to be said for a man who chooses his words wisely.
“Maybe.”
That damn barbecue could blow up right now and remove all my body hair and I’d still be standing here grinning.
He moves closer and pulls me up against him. “How about tonight?” His head dips down and I feel his lips on my neck.
My nipples go hard under my tank top. “Stop,” I whisper, looking around to see if anyone’s watching. Luckily we have a helluva smokescreen, thanks to Quin’s dad.
He lifts his head. “Really?”
“No. Yes. No.”
His smile is stunning. It’s like the sun just blasted me full-force right in the face, minus the heat. I go gah-gah over the effect, and my tongue comes out to lick my suddenly dry lips.
“I’ll take that as a yes.” He presses his mouth to mine and I let the sensations wash over me. We stand there making out like we’re all alone until reality comes crashing in.
“Get a room.” Quin’s youngest brother is giggling with his friends off to our left. I guess the smokescreen isn’t as awesome as I thought it was.
Rebel pulls his mouth away but hugs me tight, whispering in my ear. “Raincheck. You’re mine later.”
I hug him tight around the neck, burying my face into his shoulder. “I’m yours now.”
My arms freeze and my body goes tense. I’m embarrassed that something sounding very much like a pledge just slipped out like that. I meant to play around
with him and be all sexy, but now it’s like I’ve asked him to marry me or something. I hang on like a leech because I’m afraid to see the look on his face. I wait for his withdrawal.
But instead of letting me go, he squeezes me around the middle a little tighter and lifts me up off my feet. “You make me really happy.” His whisper comes into my ear and spreads warmth throughout my entire body.
As soon as the words are out of his mouth, my heart settles down. Maybe I haven’t screwed everything up by being a complete lovesick idiot. Maybe he likes me back as much as I like him. Maybe, maybe, maybe…
“All right, all right, break it up,” Quin says, coming back over. “Defcon five averted, my eyebrows are as perfect as they ever were. Tea, you either need to get some serious glasses or kiss my ass for saying that.”
Rebel puts me down, and I feign innocence. “Saying what?”
She rolls her eyes and stops in front of me, hands on hips. “Not to change the subject or anything, but I looked at those financials your dad sent you.” She snags my cup out of my hand and then stares down inside it, disappointed to find it empty.
My mood immediately deflates. “Way to bring me back down to earth.” I look around, trying to spot the punch bowl. I seriously need a refill.
“Sorry, but it needs to be said. There’s some serious shit in that stuff from the thumb drive.”
“Serious as in …” Rebel waits for the answer to his question as I chew my lip. I’m not sure I want to know what she found. Would it be rude to leave them standing there to get more alcohol?
“Serious as in book-cooking, serious. Like Betty Crocker of the accounting world, next-level bullshit serious. And I read the memos he had in there, too.” She lowers her voice. “Want to know what I think?” She looks first at Rebel and then at me.
“Yes,” he says.
“No,” I say at the same time.
She puts her hands on her hips again, knocking the cup out of her own hand in the process. I watch it fall to the ground and keep my eyes glued to it. I cannot look at Quin right now, and I know for a fact I don’t want to hear what she’s about to say.