Chapter 27: Questions
I could feel the morning sun stretching across the bed. I thought about opening up my eyes but decided against it. Marcus's arms were still around me. He had stayed with me all night as promised. I grinned.
“I know you’re awake,” Marcus sang in my ear.
“No I’m not . . . my eyes are still closed,” I sang back, pulling his arm tighter around me.
“Phoebe, just because your eyes are closed, doesn’t mean the morning will never come,” he firmly pointed out.
“All right, but if I open my eyes, that means you’ll be leaving, and I don’t want you to go,” I pouted. “So I’ll be keeping them closed today.”
“I’ll miss you too, Darling. I’ll try to return as soon as I can.” He kissed my cheek and sat up.
“Sure I can’t persuade you to stay?” I smiled coyly as I looked up at him.
He lay back down beside me and pulled my body next to his. “You could but would it be wise?” I could just see little flakes of red swirling through his dark brown eyes—he was hungry this morning. I swallowed a lump in my throat.
He let out a laugh and reluctantly got out of bed.
I thought for half a second, smiled deviously, flipped the covers off my body and tried to look as seductive as possible. I knew it was dangerous; I knew I was only prolonging the inevitable, but still . . . I had to try.
“Marcus?” My voice was even, innocent.
“Yes, my love?” he looked up from buttoning his shirt. His lips parted.
“You don’t have to leave this very moment . . . do you?”
He looked my body over in the amount of time it takes someone to blink. He yanked his shirt off and had me wrapped in his arms so fast; I couldn’t help but giggle at how quickly he was persuaded.
We spent the next several hours loving each other. I never wanted him to let me go.
“You know I would stay here for eternity with you if I could.” His mouth moved up my neck slowly. “Eventually, Luther will send someone to find me.”
I frowned. Luther. I’d almost forgotten about him. “You’d better go then,” I said in a soft voice.
His eyes met mine. I could see the fear in them. He was just as scared as I was. I had to be brave for him. I had to give him the strength to go. I held his face between my hands and smiled. “Come back to me soon.” The words came out softer than a whisper. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” he whispered back. His lips kissed mine, lingering longer than he should have. I laughed, pushing him playfully out of bed.
I pulled the sheets around me, snuggling into their warmth, as I watched him dress. The sun moved across his body, shining brightly against his pale skin. When I looked at Marcus like this, it was hard to imagine he was a vampire. He was striking to look at—flawless. He reminded me of a painting I’d seen once of an angel—soft and beautiful. His eyes were brown like his hair. His lips—perfect for kissing—were a light shade of pink. His well-defined body from head to toe only added to the illusion that he wasn’t human.
I could feel an involuntary smile sweep across my face.
“What are you looking so pleased about?” he asked as he caught me gawking.
“Lots of things actually,” I admitted truthfully, blushing a little.
He came back over to the bed—a potentially dangerous move, and flopped down next to me.
“For example . . .” he prompted.
“Alright, how is it that you are so absolutely perfect? Your body, that is,” I clarified quickly.
He smiled at me like the Cheshire cat. “You think I’m perfect?”
I frowned. “Can you honestly tell me that you didn’t know that God bestowed every gift upon you?”
“Fair enough,” he grinned. “But God did not bestow this on me. When you become a vampire, certain things about your physical appearance are enhanced, as are your senses and your strength. I don’t know why it happens, other than it makes us more appealing to our prey.”
He moved closer to me, his lips nearly touching mine. I could feel my heart beating faster and faster as I fell under his spell once again. “You should run . . .” his cool breath blew across my lips; I could almost taste his skin. “Your mind is telling you to run, but your eyes betray you. You’re only as safe as I allow you to be.” He kissed my lips abruptly and smiled.
I tried to focus, attempting to sake the intoxicated feeling that had swept over me.
“Anything else?” he asked, still sporting a smug smile.
I smacked him on the shoulder playfully and frowned before I looked away from him. He’d done that on purpose!
“Ask me!” he prompted.
I took a deep breath. “Is it hard . . . not to bite people?” My eyes evaded his still.
“No. I’ve been accustomed to drinking another way now for so long that I don’t even think of people as food so much anymore,” he spoke casually. “As for losing control in the heat of the moment though, that’s another story entirely,” he smiled crookedly. “Biting while love making is common,” His mouth grazed my neck, further heating my blood.
“What about Raymose?” I asked. “Does he get his food like you do?” I felt a little embarrassed, like I was asking something private.
“Yes, although he hasn’t been at it as long as I have. He finds it harder to resist when he’s tempted.” His eyes narrowed as he saw me avoiding his stare. “There’s something else isn’t there?”
“It’s not a necessary question.” I brushed it off. “You’d better get going.”
“Ask me.”
“All right, but don’t get mad . . .” I began.
Marcus shot me an uneasy look. History proved, that when a woman told a man “don’t get mad,” it usually meant he was going to get mad. He shifted his weight and gave me an uneasy look. This would be no different.
“If I were bit again . . .” I started slowly, watching Marcus grow more anxious by the second, “ . . . by either a vampire or a werewolf, would that harm . . . if I were pregnant, that is . . .” I shrugged, trying to sound blasé about the question, “ . . . a baby?”
Marcus's had gone still, considering the question before he answered. “I do not know what a werewolf bite would do if you’ve already conceived. Your heart would somehow continue to beat, although you become immortal. Blood would still pump through your veins. A child could still live—perhaps.”
I sighed. Happy to hear that if for some reason Damen decided to take another bite, all might not be lost.
“As for being bit by a vampire,” he continued. “It most likely would kill the child. Your heart stops and your body ceases to work in the normal fashion.” His eyes were fixed on me.
“But my heart could still beat, right? I’m partially werewolf already! I couldn’t be turned completely. You don’t know that my heart would stop beating.”
His eyes narrowed. “Why would you ask me this?”
“No reason in particular. I just was just curious, that’s all.”
Marcus held my arm firmly as I moved to get up. I hated how he saw right through me . . . I couldn’t keep anything from him. His eyes were piercing.
“We’ve been less than cautious wouldn’t you say?” I admitted in defeat.
He didn’t answer. The silence was maddening. I could feel his eyes boring holes through my back. I couldn’t stand it any longer.
“I’m getting dressed. Raymose will be here in awhile, and I want to eat before we start.” I pulled away from him and went to the closet for my clothes. I glanced his way once again before I retreated to the bathroom—he hadn’t moved a muscle.
When I stepped out of the bathroom, I found Marcus in nearly the same position as I left him. His face looked tense. He was obviously preoccupied, and my questions, I was willing to bet, were the core root for this behavior.
“What time do you have to leave?” I asked, hoping to distract him from resuming our last conversation.
“Soo
n.” His voice was even, careful . . . too careful.
“Well, I’d better get downstairs,” I suggested half-heartedly.
“Phoebe, I was thinking. Perhaps you should go home. I mean you must have work to do. I’m sure your friends would like to see you again.”
“What?” He wanted me to go home? “Leah is mailing me my supplies as we speak. I’d planned on working on that while you’re away.”
His expression was completely unreadable. “There really isn’t anything here for you. I think it would be best . . .” his voice trailed off in my head. I could see his lips moving, but the words were silent. His tone had been as unfriendly as his eyes . . . they were dark and cold. There really isn’t anything here for me? I stared at him in disbelief. What about him?
“Phoebe, are you listening to me?”
“You want me to leave?” It wasn’t really a question, but I couldn’t believe I’d heard right.
“Yes.”
“But Why?” I didn’t understand.
“I think it would be best if you spent your time away from here; away from me. Away from all of this.”
Something snapped inside me. It was as if he’d slapped me across the face. I sucked my cheeks in and took a deep breath. “Fine!”
“Really? You’re not going to argue with me about it?” he sounded almost excited. Bastard!
“There’s no need to argue; I understand perfectly.” I smiled like I was going to eat him alive, and that’s exactly what I planned to do.
There was a knock at my door.
“Come in,” I called cheerfully.
“Good morning, Miss. And to you Sir,” Richard seemed disgustingly happy.
“I’m not sure it is a good morning, Richard,” Marcus noted. He was trying to decipher my reaction to his suggestion.
“Mr. Raymose is here, Miss Rose. He asked me to bring your horse around to the back. He’s waiting in the library to speak with you, Sir, before you leave.” He was addressing Marcus now.
“Thank you, Richard. A ride sounds perfect.”
“Very good, Miss. Charlotte asked me to bring you this. She thought you might be hungry.” He sat a tray of food down on the table.
I grabbed a muffin and took such a violent chomp out of it, that most of it didn’t even enter my mouth. My eyes narrowed at Marcus as I chewed, enjoying his discomfort.
“Phoebe . . .” he warned.
I walked over to the fireplace, grabbed the sword off the wall, and said rather surly, “Have a nice trip!” I stormed out of the room, taking the muffin with me.
I was furious. I couldn’t believe he wanted me to leave. After I’d given myself to him! “I think it would be best if you spend your time away from here,” I repeated aloud in an exaggerated, snotty tone.
I growled out in frustration as I stormed out the back doors.
I saw Rain tied to the railing, waiting for me. I climbed up onto his back and was just about settled in my saddle when Marcus grabbed onto the reins.
“Hey!”
“You’re not riding,” he growled.
“Don’t worry, I won’t hurt the horse,” I scoffed, trying to free the rains from his grasp.
“I’m not worried about the horse,” he hissed. “I don’t want you taking chances. You’re not that good a rider.” His tone was sharp, and the expression on his face would have frightened anyone including me—but not today. I rolled my eyes at him.
“You can’t tell me what to do,” I snapped defiantly. “Besides, Rain takes good care of me. Don’t you, boy?” I patted Rain’s neck softly. “Unlike some people!”
“As you said,” he stepped closer; the fierceness in his tone was unmistakable. “We’ve been less than cautious. I’d think it is a safe assumption . . .”
“It’s too soon to worry about that. Besides, it’s a moot point anyway. Werewolves can’t conceive. You said so yourself. So the way I see it . . .you’re in the clear. You don’t have to concern yourself about it any longer.” I smiled victoriously. I didn’t know why I hadn’t thought about that sooner. I’d worried for nothing!
“What?” he looked at me incredulously. “I never—”
“What’s going on?” Raymose came walking down the stairs and right into the middle of World War III. “Didn’t Richard tell you I was waiting?” He seemed put out.
“Relax, Marcus.” I yanked the reins from his hand. “Raymose will look after me. He always has.” I smirked.
“Raymose doesn’t understand,” Marcus growled under his breath. “And you are my responsibility.”
“Not anymore!”
“Hey, is everything alright here?” Raymose moved beside me. He looked from me to Marcus.
“No,” I answered for Marcus. I turned my head to Raymose and smiled brightly. “Marcus has asked me to leave. I’ll be going home as soon as I can arrange a flight.” I kept my tone as pleasant as my smile.
“Are you crazy?” Raymose yelled at Marcus. “That’s the first place Damen will look for her when he realizes she’s no longer here.”
“You didn’t allow me to explain,” Marcus snapped, although his stare was on me.
“You don’t need to explain. I’ve become a burden. You’ve had your fun, and now you’d rather I leave than have to worry about me. ” I spoke knowingly.
“What?” I could almost feel the heat radiating off of Marcus—he was furious.
“You’re not going alone,” Raymose promised, his eyes meeting mine.
Marcus turned to Raymose. His expression was one of betrayal. “You do not want to get in the middle of this.”
“I am in the middle of this,” Raymose hissed. “I won’t let her go unprotected. Not again. Never again.”
“I’m not sending her unprotected—Richard will be with her, just until the danger is over.” Marcus looked like he was going to explode.
“I don’t need Richard to go with me, and I don’t need any of your false concern. Like you said, it would be best if I spend my time away from here, away from you!” I threw his words back at him.
“Is that what you got out of our conversation?” he snapped.
I shot him a haughty look and turned away, giving Rain a hard kick. A moment later, Raymose was beside me, his horse keeping in step with Rain.
“You feel like dancing?” He smiled at me as he rode ahead quickly.
Dancing? Ah . . . that’s what Raymose used to call swordplay I thought to myself, smiling at the memory. Raymose had an infectious way about him. He was just what I needed right now—a distraction. I gave Rain another kick, urging him faster. I never looked back . . .
Raymose bolted across the lawn as quickly as his horse would move. It didn’t take Rain long to catch up. He was exceptionally fast. We slowed down to a soft lope as Raymose looked around.
“This looks like a good spot,” he said as he brought his horse to a stop.
“Good spot for what?”
He held out his sword. “We have a date. Remember?”
My smile was forced.
He reached out and put his arm around my shoulders. “How can I help?” he asked softly.
I shrugged and slid off my horse. Raymose followed close behind and sat down beside me under a tree. I leaned up against the trunk and looked up into the leafy foliage. It was thick and green still. There was no sign of autumn approaching. I stared at the leaves as they flickered in the light breeze. They looked almost florescent green in the sunlight.
“English Oak!” he said as he tapped the tree with his fist. “Do you want to talk about it?” he motioned to the house with a nod.
“There’s no point. He doesn’t want me.” I resided. It hurt to say it out loud. The “there’s nothing for you here” comment still smarted.
“No. Not Marcus. He’d never push you away . . . anymore than I would. There’s more to it.”
“It doesn’t matter. Maybe it’s better this way.” I lifted my chin up. “Being a human in your world is dangerous!” I got
up and began twirling my sword around.
Raymose lay back on the grass with his hands behind his head, watching me.
“You know you can tell me anything,” his voice sounded like a soft song I’d heard long ago.
“What did Damen mean when he said you’ve loved me longer than he has?”
Raymose stared quietly at me. I’d taken him by surprise but he wasn’t uncomfortable.
“It isn’t polite to kiss and tell, Lady Phoebe,” he smirked, bowing his head slightly.
“You addressed me like that before? Why?”
“Your father is looked upon as royalty. He’s our king, our creator. It is out of the deepest respect I address you by your title.” He bowed once more.
I lowered my eyes a little. I could feel my cheeks burning. “You loved me?”
Raymose’s mouth curled up into a smile. “Before you’d met Marcus; a lifetime ago, several lifetimes ago. You and I were . . . once very close. Yes. I loved you.”
I continued to play with the sword. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know any more; it might make things uncomfortable between us. I didn’t want to lose Raymose—ever!
“I used to confide in you?” I asked after a few minutes.
“You knew I’d always be straight with you, help you when you needed it, and even when you didn’t.” He smirked.
I laughed a little to myself. Raymose was my partner in crime, I’d figured that much out. No wonder Marcus didn’t want us ‘playing’ together. Marcus was sensible, and Raymose . . . Raymose was potential trouble.
“Did my father know you . . . cared for me?” I chose my word carefully, evading his stare. I could feel him smiling.
“If you’re asking if he approved—yes.”
“Did he approve of Marcus?” I asked nonchalantly, still twirling my sword into the light.
His smile broadened. “Yes.”
I nodded sharply.
“Now,” he began. “Why would Marcus send you home?” he questioned, starting me straight in the face. “Why would he think you’re safer there?”
“I don’t know, maybe you should ask him. He told me there wasn’t anything for me here.” I tried to sound uncaring.
“He’s already left,” Raymose said, his eyes still on me.
“Oh.” I hadn’t expected he’d leave right away. “I should get back then. I have a lot of packing to do.” If I was going to cry, I didn’t want Raymose to see it.
Raymose got to Rain before me. “I thought we’d come to practice,” he said playfully.
“You still want to?”
“I promised I’d help you, and you need all the help you can get,” he joked. But then his face grew serious. His hand reached out and gently pushed aside a piece of hair that had fallen out of place. I saw the look in his eyes as he stared into mine.
“Raymose . . .” My voice was shaky. I felt like I was losing control of my senses.
“Shhh.” He leaned in slowly . . .
I didn’t move. I closed my eyes as his lips gently met mine. It was just as I remembered. A peaceful feeling came over me. I smiled, keeping my eyes shut. I could feel him watching me.
“You’re blushing,” he mused.
“Raymose—”
“Shhh,” He put his finger to my lips. “I just wanted to see if you were still in there, if you’re truly the same Phoebe.” He sighed contently.
“Raymose I’m not.” I could feel the heat rising in my face as I lied. “I’m sorry, I can’t!” My heart started pounding erratically. All the memories of Raymose and I continued to flood my mind, and I knew, these couldn’t be Damen’s memories—these were hers—the memories of a Phoebe long ago.
Without warning, he pulled me to him. His arms encircled me as he held me tightly, lifting me off the ground, his lips longingly taking mine.
I didn’t push him away like I thought I would—I pulled him closer—wrapping my arms around his neck. I was caught up in the memories and the moment of his embrace. I kissed him desperately, heady. He moaned in delight as our kiss intensified.
“Raymose!” My lips broke free, my senses taking hold of me. He released me, and I staggered back a little, gasping for air.
“I still love you,” he admitted just as breathless. His eyes were smoldering. “You remember me, don’t you?”
“Yes,” I gasped. It was the truth. I remembered him, all of him. Raymose had once been my world. A piece of me still mourned the loss of him. How this was possible, I didn’t know.
“That won’t happen again,” he breathed. “Not unless you’re free to love me back. I won’t take you from Marcus.”
I stared at him in disbelief. “Raymose I’m sorry. I can’t love you the way you want me to.” I could feel my stomach turn. I suddenly felt empty, sad as I watched Raymose smile understandingly—I’d hurt him.
“I know where your heart is. I’ll be content being your friend, if you’ll still have me?” he looked hopeful.
I reached out and held his cheek with my hand. He closed his eyes for a moment and smiled, leaning into my touch.
“You will always be my friend. Thank you.” I put my arms around him and gave him a hug.
“For what?” He hugged me back.
“For loving me, and protecting me.” I could feel the tears swelling in my eyes.
He kissed my forehead gently. “You can always count on me for that.” He reached up and messed my hair before I could duck away. “Now, defend yourself!”
I screamed playfully as Raymose chased me across the lawn with his sword, laughing wildly.
I spent the rest of the afternoon with him. It was just like it used to be. We laughed and talked, not about anything in particular, mostly about my lack of skills—the topic of preference for him. Secretly I think he was trying to rile me up in the hopes that I’d improve. This would undoubtedly take time—lots of time!
We’d finished around four o’clock, and I was exhausted. Raymose was relentless. He didn’t take “I’m tired” for an excuse. We practiced each move until I blocked Raymose’s sword successfully. I’d learn from him, or die. There was no other option.
I put Rain in his stall and walked slowly back to the castle. Raymose had gone to meet Marcus. He promised to return the next afternoon, and I’d better be here or he threatened to come get me and drag me kicking and screaming back across the ocean. He also informed me that we wouldn’t be traveling by plane! I believed him. It was easy to agree to stay another day—I didn’t have my plane tickets yet, and since Marcus wasn’t here, I was in no immediate rush.
“Miss Rose,” Richard yelled out when I came in. “How were your lessons?” he asked a little out of breath.
“Fine.”
“This came for you by messenger.” Richard handed me a box that was from Dr. Andersen’s office.
“Like I need this,” I muttered under my breath.
Richard looked as though he were going to be sick. It was the first time I could recall him being fidgety. “Lord Ashworth has asked me to inform you that the jet is ready when you are. However, if you should feel the need to stay . . .”
I closed my eyes and repeated over and over in my head: don’t shoot the messenger Phoebe. Don’t. Shoot. The messenger. I forced a smile. I could feel my blood boiling.
“Thank you, Richard, but I wouldn’t dream of using his jet!” My voice rose with each word until I was shouting. “As for me feeling the ‘need to stay,’” I snapped. “He needn’t worry!”
Richard took a step back. My sudden outburst was unexpected to say the least.
I took a deep breath. “I’m sorry Richard; you’re not the unfeeling jerk.”
“Thank you, Miss. Shall I have Charlotte fix you something to eat?” Richard was always so polite. It almost took my thunder away.
“No thank you, I’m not that hungry. I’m going up to my room to make flight arrangements. I shouldn’t impose on you for more than a few days.”
“We don’t want you to leave, Miss, a
nd neither does Mr. Marcus.” Richard’s eyes were full of concern. “He’s worried for your safety here. That’s all. He doesn’t want to lose you again.”
“Right, if only that was true, Richard.” I smiled flatly as I turned towards the stairs. “I’ll be in my room.”