Chapter 11 -- Interlude 4
Derrick kept his head down and watched where he put his feet, moving slowly from one step to the next. He wanted to go faster, and get the hell out of his mess.
But another part of him knew he did well to move at all. If Ginger hadn't been here, he never would have gone this far.
He felt horrible for having dragged her into his mess with the Westons. Rage surged again as he thought about how Junior had been after him, and Ginger --
He missed his next step, caught his foot on a fallen limb he should have seen, flailed, and landed on his butt, pulling Ginger down with him into the cold, wet muck. Pain knifed its way through his shoulder, arm, back and leg and he bit his tongue to keep from cursing.
"Well," Ginger said. "Maybe we should take a break."
And she made him laugh again. He hadn't expected to laugh, and it hurt -- but the rage disappeared.
"You okay, Derrick?" she asked, leaning over and staring into his face.
The last person who had looked at him that way, and who had asked him the same question, had been his wife the night after they got her diagnosis. Nestled there in bed, and he could count the days he would have left with her --
Not again.
"I'm fine." He started to sit up. "Well, maybe fine isn't exactly the term I'd use."
She smiled and his heart thumped -- and he battered his emotions back into place with a reminder of sitting at Sharon's bedside and holding her hand while she died.
And then he realized how unfair his thoughts were to both of these women. Sharon would never have wanted him to treat another this way for her memory. God knew they had discussed it often enough, even when he didn't want to. She had been oddly obsessed with the idea of him going on with life, finding love again --
"Derrick?" Ginger asked softly.
He blinked Ginger back into focus. She looked worried.
"Sorry. Not all here, I guess. Let's get back up. I'm cold and wet."
"Yeah," she agreed with a sigh. But she helped him back to his feet and held on to him when he would have gone down again.
They kept walking. Derrick decided it was time to stop dragging the ghost of his dead wife along on this miserable little hike. One of them should have some rest, after all.