*CHAPTER XXXI*

  *Entente Cordiale*

  Censored--A Letter--An Oxford Version--Last Words from Ah Lum--ARencontre--Debit and Credit--SchwabSympathizes--Business--Partnership--Light in the East

  "My word! And then--and then?"

  "That's all, Monsieur Brin. The old junk sailed magnificently; withmorning light we found ourselves off the Japanese coast, and three dayslater ran safe into the harbour of Hakodate. There's nothing more totell. We spent several weeks in Japan among the plum-blossoms, and--herewe are, in time to see this great meeting of the fleets."

  Monsieur Brin and Jack Brown were among a party seated at dinner in theGeorge Hotel, Portsmouth. The Browns had landed at Southampton two daysbefore with Count Walewski and his daughter. They had been met by Mrs.Brown and her two other children, and had now come to Portsmouth towitness the festivities in connection with the visit of the Frenchfleet. Monsieur Brin was at the same hotel, in the capacity of specialreporter for the _Soleil_.

  "But now, Monsieur," continued Jack, "I've told you all our adventures.What about yourself? What have you been doing since I saw you last atHarbin?"

  "Ah! You ask! My friend, my history is in sum one word--Kaiser! Youleft me in Harbin: well, I devote care to Hildebrand Schwab; herecovers; we are both recalled, he because his negatives are all lost, Ibecause when I describe the only battle I saw, my despatch is blackedout by the censor. Naturally my redacteur open his eyes when he mustpay my bills for such as this. Look! Here is a leaf of my copy; that iswhat the Russian censor has done--and Russia, par exemple! is the allyof France. Behold!"

  He took a leaf from his pocket-book, and laid it on the table. Itappeared as follows:--

  "Les Russes ont commence aujourd'hui un ------------------ ------------------------------------ j'ai vu le general Kouropatkin qui buvait -------------------------------- -------------- 'Doucement berce sur ma mule fringante,' je chevauchais a cote du general ---------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- au meme moment, psst! j'entends le sifflement d'un obus qui me va au----dessus de la tete eclater dans ------------------------------------------ ---------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------- des jambes, des bras, *disjecta membra*, comme dit le ---------------- ------------ plus loin, un medecin qui plonge ------------ -------------------------- et ---------------------------- -------------- la bataille."

  "That is my account of a most dramatic episode of the battle of theSha-ho. What is left? Nothing! It provoke curiosity, it tantalise,but does it satisfy, does it excite, hein?"

  "The censor has certainly made a terrible hash of it," said Mr. Brown,passing the paper round the table. It created much amusement, andseemed to fascinate Jack's fifteen-year-old brother Humphrey, who gazedat it with a sort of awful admiration.

  "But you spoke of Herr Schwab," said Jack. "What became of him?"

  "He came----"

  "By gum!" interrupted Humphrey, "don't I wish old Caesar's despatcheshad been blacked out like this!"

  Brin glanced at the boy over his glasses and resumed:

  "Schwab came with me from Harbin by the same train. My word! it isKaiser, Kaiser all the way. 'Our Kaiser who is in Berlin': I begin tothink that is the German paternoster. I left Schwab at Vienna; he wasgoing to sell his camera. He has a great admiration for you, Mr. Jack,but he is filled with regret that he never had an opportunity of doingbusiness for Schlagintwert with that chief of brigands--how did he callhimself?"

  "Ah Lum. By the way, I forgot to tell you that when we landed atSouthampton I found a letter awaiting me from him; it had been forwardedfrom Shanghai, and got here first owing to our little tour in Japan. Itexplains how Sowinski was able to reach Sakhalin."

  He handed Ah Lum's letter to the Frenchman. Brin read it carefully, andwith much gravity. It was as follows:--

  From my camp above Tu-men-tzue, First Sunday after Trinity.

  Honoured Sir,

  A man's manners, says the Sage T'ai Ping-fu, are to be measured by hisintentions. If therefore your servant, greatly deploring his ignoranceof your honourable language, write through another hand, I pray you willnot charge him with want of courtesy; does not the poet say "Respect isthe corner-stone of friendship"? Nor will you, honoured sir, be otherthan indulgent if this letter should seem to have been unduly delayed inthe writing. Even as a pearl is not to be found in every oyster, so isit rare among our literati to meet a scholar learned in the barbarictongues. Such a one I have now discovered in the writer of this letter,Mr. Chang Fu-sing, whose late return from the august University atOxford was duly reported by my agents at Ma-en-ho-kai. [_LincolnCollege: 3rd class Mods., aegrotat Mod. Hist. Chang Fu-sing, B.A.Oxon._] Him I secured by night for the trifling loss of five men. [_Mynose abraded; one eye bunged up. Ch. F.-s., B.A.Oxon._] Trifling, forrarity--and the need of the purchaser--are the true measures of value.To the starving man a crust outweighs a viceroy's ransom.

  Since the auspicious day when your honour's never-to-be-forgottenassistance enabled our troops to reach the shelter of these mountains,the insolent Russians--may their graves be defiled!--[_Idiom="Ruin seizethee!" Cf. Gray, "The Bard", i. 1. Ch. F.-s., B.A. Oxon._]--have notdared to molest your unworthy servant. For, as the ineffable T'aiPing-fu says, the bird that has once escaped the net is hard indeed tosnare. But, again, as Wang Wei reminds us to our profit in his _Essayon Military Matters_, small reverses, by inspiring caution, may benefitan army, even as small successes may lead through saucy confidence tohumiliation. After a little affair otherwise unworthy of your augustattention, the two prisoners, Bekovitch and Sowinski, were found to haveabsented themselves from our custody. As the proverb goes, Only a foolexpects courtesy from a hog.

  Yet, as Li T'ai-poh harmoniously says:

  When stings the Bee, and Pain is keen, then shouldst thou think of Honey; Wise Men seek Good in every Ill, yea, e'en in Loss of Money.

  [_The versification is mine. Competitor: Newdigate Verse. Ch. F.-s.,B.A. Oxon._] After consulting the works of Tu Fu, I found that, thesunshine of your honour's presence being withdrawn, it was allowable toreturn to our ancestral usages in matters relating to the treatment ofprisoners and criminals. If in this my judgment was in error, I mustbeg your honour's clemency; for are we not taught by P'an T'ang-shenthat in defending a friend from calumny all measures are laudable? Itmay suffice to say that some days before his escape, the Pole, kneelingon hot chains, was induced to confess his crimes; these were dulyinscribed by him in the Russian tongue and signed. Thereafter hispartner in guilt, who had shown more obduracy, even resisting our mostapproved means of persuasion, acknowledged his many wickednesses, amongthem the preparation of forged papers secretly introduced by a menialinto the writing-cabinet of your honour's august father. True is it, asthe Sage says, "Fear rather a faithless servant within the gates than ahundred enemies without", or, as the more homely proverb warns us, Aworm at the root will bring the noblest oak to earth.

  But calamity treads hard upon the heels of the wicked. Witness the fateof the Russian--may his posterity be cut off! [_Idiom="A murrain onthee!" Cf. Shakespeare, "The Tempest", iii. 2. 88. Ch. F.-s., B.A.Oxon._] By sure hands your unworthy servant brought his confessionbeneath the eyes of the barbarian commander-in-chief. He is blindindeed who cannot see the length of his nose. My agents now inform methat the evil-doer is stripped of his offices, and of the emolumentsthereto pertaining; as our saying goes, he has lost his buttons. Hisfellow-criminal has evaded my most diligent enquiries. But him alsoJustice pursues with sharpened sword, resting not by night neither byday.
r />   Quantum suff. Though our lives be henceforth as two rivers flowing eastand west, the recollection of past favours will be with me, honouredsir, as a plant in perennial bloom. What says P'an T'ang-shen?--"A manshould find as much joy in the remembrance of a friend as though hisworst enemy were to boil in oil."

  My son, who is now under the tutorial charge of Mr. ChangFu-sing--[_purely honorary--no pay. Ch. F.-s., B.A. Oxon._]--adds, asin duty bound, his humble respects.

  Permit me, honoured sir, to subscribe myself

  Your most grateful obedient Servant, AH LUM.

  P.S.--May I venture once more to commend the works of Li T'ai-poh toyour august attention?

  "Thanks!" said Brin, handing the letter back. "I am ver' muchinterested. The English is good, hein? In the idiom of Oxford? Permitme to make a copy for my book that will appear at early date,_L'Ascension de la Chine_."

  Meanwhile Humphrey Brown had gone to the window, and stood with hishands in his pockets looking into the crowded street. A cab rattled upto the door of the hotel.

  "I say," said Humphrey, "here's a funny old guy. Come and look, Agnes."

  "I prefer to listen to the conversation," said Agnes, a self-possessedgirl of thirteen.

  "All right, grumps! But it would make you laugh. He's coming into thehotel. My eye!"

  Not two minutes later the door opened, and there entered a portly figurein light-striped flannels; a pink cummerbund showing beneath the vest;gold-rimmed eyeglasses fixed somewhat awry on his broad nose. He stoodat the door for a moment to choose his table.

  "By George!" exclaimed Jack, springing up; "it's Schwab himself."

  He went towards the door.

  "Good-evening, Herr Schwab!" he said, holding out his hand.

  The German turned and stared.

  "Ach! I haf not ze honour, unless--who do you rebresent, sir?"

  Jack smiled. Schwab instantly seized him by the hand.

  "Du meine Guete! I abologize. I know you now. Nefer before did I seeyou in ze evenink dress. How are you, how are you, how are you?"

  "Jolly glad to see you," said Jack. "Come and be introduced to myfather, and mother, and the rest. You know Brin. We were talking ofyou only a minute ago."

  The introductions were made. Humphrey turned away to hide his laughterat the German's elephantine bows.

  "I abologize to ze ladies for my so unbecoming addire, but ven Iegsblain zat I haf shust gome from ze station----"

  "Say no more," said Mr. Brown. "Very unfortunate I couldn't meet you inMoukden, Mr. Schwab."

  "Ach ja! Bermit me to ask, haf you seen ze evenink baber?"

  "Not yet."

  "Vell, I haf vun. I bought it at ze station; ze baber boys zey shouldbe made to keep change. I haf only a benny, ze boy he haf no ha'bny--Imuss vait five minutes till anozer gustomer arrive. Zat is notbusiness. Ven I read ze baber, I see a baragraph vat I zink interessyou. I read to you. 'It is announced from St. Betersburg zat zerebresentations of ze British ambassador in regard to ze extraordinarycase of Mr. Brown of Moukden haf at last been crowned viz success, andorders haf been issued for Mr. Brown's immediate release.' Zere issomezink I do not understan', since already Mr. Brown is here."

  "Ah! You're not a diplomat, Mr. Schwab," said Mr. Brown, laughing. "Itis a little funny to know that three months after my escape, and whenSakhalin is in possession of the Japanese, I am graciously permitted toregain my liberty."

  Jack gave Herr Schwab a brief account of the final scenes of his quest.

  "Zen for how much is your claim?" asked Schwab of Mr. Brown at theconclusion of the story.

  "What claim?"

  "Vy, your claim for gombensation--for intellectual and moral damage.Business are business. As business man, I advise downright zumping bigclaim."

  "Well, Mr. Schwab, I've been turning over the matter, and really I thinkI'll let things alone. You see, Sowinski is dead, poor wretch! andBekovitch is degraded, and if the account were properly adjusted, andJack's damage to the Siberian railway put on the debit side, the balancemight turn out against us after all."

  "Ach! zat is anozer matter--ja! you muss gonsider ze balance-sheet. Zatis business."

  "You are still in business?" said Jack.

  "I am in business forever. It is ze bress of my nostrils.Vargorresbondencephotography, zat is not business; it do not bayegsbenses. I am now in beacephotography. I gome here, rebresentative ofSchlagintwert, to make bicturebostcardphotographs of ze French andEnglish entente. And zen I return to ze Baltic to make photograph ofour Kaiser ven he velgome ze British fleet."

  "He!" cried Brin with a chuckle. "Welcome! It must besnap-shot--prestissimo! When your Kaiser welcome the British fleetthere will need a good camera, and exposure--one-millionth second. Ho!ho!"

  Later in the evening Schwab took Jack confidentially aside.

  "Mr. Brown, my frient, I have somezink to say. It has been gonfided tome zat you gondemblate a gondract."

  "A contract, Herr Schwab?"

  Schwab guffawed.

  "Zat is my shoke--a madrimonial gondract."

  "Who has been telling you that?"

  "Ah, I haf it in gonfidence from your sister. Already is she a frient.She tell everybody in gonfidence."

  "Then you can contradict it in confidence, Herr Schwab. There is nofoundation--that is to say, nothing is settled."

  Schwab looked sly.

  "No, not settled, of course--but gondemblated."

  "Really, Herr Schwab!----"

  "Yes, yes, I understan'. Shust so. I also have affair of ze heart."He sighed deeply. "I can symbazise. But viz me it is different. Youare lucky dog--ze Fraeulein Walewska is kind; vile I am in ze depss ofdesbair: Madame Bottle--ach, she is gruel. I sigh, she smile; I groan,she laugh; I even make bresentation, she decline vizout zanks. Ah! Mr.Brown, you do not know vat it is to be gross in lov."

  Jack looked as sympathetic as he could, while Herr Schwab, laying hishand lightly on his waistcoat-buttons, continued lugubriously:

  "Ach, truly it is a terrible zink to lov vizout return. It break zeheart; it shpoil ze digestion;--it is bad for business. No longer can Igif sole attention to ze interest of Schlagintwert. Vy, it is only afew days since I take order from Robinson & Robinson in London;yesterday Schlagintwert return ze order. Vat haf I written?--'SubblyMrs. Bottle, 68 Crutched Friars, London, 50 casks botato shbirit, lastquotation, f.o.b. Hamburg.' Zere is fipence vaste in bostages. Zatshow you!"

  "Yes, very amusing," said Jack absently. Gabriele had just come in withMrs. Brown, and Jack was on thorns lest the German's by no means gentlevoice should reach the ladies.

  "Amusink!" cried Schwab. "Schlagintwert do not see ze shoke. Vy----"

  "Of course, I meant annoying. But, Herr Schwab, if you will----"

  "Yes, yes," said Schwab, noticing how Jack's eyes strayed to the otherend of the room, and how he fidgeted with his watch-chain. "Yes, I see.Only vun moment, Mr. Brown. Ze business I shboke of. Already I mentionit to ze young lady----"

  "Upon my word, Herr Schwab!--

  "Vait, I egsblain. Zere is nozink fix--not nozink at all. Ze Fraeuleinvill say nozink. She blush; zen she ask me to tell her about myancestor, Hildebrand Suobensius. But zis is business."

  "Well, what is it, Herr Schwab?"

  "It is an obbortunity--an obbortunity for Schlagintwert and foryourself. Our firma establish a new branch--bon-bons, gonfectionery.Zey vish to open accounts in zis gountry: you understan'?"

  "Understand?--what?"

  "Vy, zis--here is ze obbortunity. Schlagintwert zey requireadvertisement: zey shall make you ze vedding-gake--_costprice_!"

  About six weeks later, Mr. Brown was looking over his copy of the_Shanghai Mercury_ which had come by the morning post.

  "Here, Jack," he said, "this paragraph will interest you."

  Jack took the paper, and read:

  "One of the results of the treaty of peace recently signed betweenRussia and Japan is that the famous brigand,
Ah Lum, has been summonedto Pekin. The military ability he displayed in his operations innorthern Manchuria has been recognized by his appointment to a high postin the Board of Civil Office."

  There is shortly to be started, in Hong-Kong, a new firm of producebrokers under the style of Brown, Son, & Co. Brown we know; Son weknow; Co. at present consists of Mr. Hi An-tzu. Whether it will by andby include Mr. Hi Lo-ch'u depends on that young man's business aptitude:Son thinks it very probable. Brown is to be the sleeping, or as heprefers to put it, the consulting partner. Son will manage the Londonhouse; while Mr. Hi in Hong-Kong will open accounts with respectableManchurian farmers, of whom one will undoubtedly be Mr. Wang.

  Some of Brown's friends took him to task for lifting his formercompradore from his lowly station to the equality of partnership. Totheir remonstrance Brown replied with a morsel of political philosophy.

  "It's all very well," he said, "to sneer at the 'heathen Chinee', andlook upon him as fit for nothing better than to smoke your opium and doyour work in South African mines. Believe me, John Chinaman is not sovery heathen; and he is waking up: and when he does move he will hustle.For myself, I prefer a colleague to a competitor."

  What Brown thinks to-day his business friends generally think to-morrow.