Page 26 of Worth It


  “I guess there’s only one way to really test these things then. Let’s go to your room.”

  He followed readily and let me tuck him into his bed. “You keep the lucky rabbit foot and monster repellant both under your pillow, okay? And we’ll see if anything else bugs you for the rest of the night. If you sense even the presence of one, you just yank both gadgets out and put them to work. See if they help, okay?”

  “Okay. I’ll try them.”

  He let me leave, and when I checked on him five minutes later as I promised him I would, he was fast asleep. I could see his hand in the moonlight coming in through the window, though, and my gifts were tightly clasped in his grip.

  Feeling as if my job were done, I went back to my room alone. Except I tossed and turned because I kept thinking about Knox, wishing it were that easy to take away whatever nightmares were haunting him.

  When I woke, I felt gritty and worn and even more depressed. I’d pushed Knox so hard already. Maybe I should just let him be and give up. Except the idea of him being finally free of prison and not with me gave me a small panic attack. I wasn’t sure if I could give up, because he was the only thing I’d ever really wanted. I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I stopped dreaming of being with him.

  “Morning,” Aspen chirped as I trudged into the kitchen.

  I mumbled something I hoped she took as, “Good morning,” and shuffled directly to the coffeemaker. Once I poured myself a cup, I slumped into a chair across from her and Noel.

  They stared at me a little too brightly...and expectantly. I finally muttered, “What?” when neither of them said anything.

  Aspen snickered. “So... he was too dark and brooding for you, huh?”

  “Oh, hell,” I muttered, slapping my hand to my forehead. “Ten has a big mouth, you know that?”

  “Oh, we know.” Noel grinned and sipped at his own steaming brew. “I’m just glad it was you and not us he was gossiping about this time.” Covering his wife’s hand, he sent her a small smile.

  It was such a sweet, loving gesture, and the look in their eyes was full of so much adoration and commitment, I burst into tears.

  “Oh my God. Felicity?” Aspen was out of her chair and flying around to sit by me and take my hand so fast I laughed through my tears, and then went back to sobbing. “Honey, what is it?”

  “Did Parker hurt you?” Noel demanded.

  “No,” I wailed. “He would never. I just...” Oh hell, this was so mortifying, and I still couldn’t help but make a total fool of myself as I wailed, “I just...I love him so much.”

  “What the hell?” Noel sputtered. “The other night, you didn’t even know him.”

  “I just didn’t recognize him,” I argued. “He looked so different, and acted so different. The last time I saw him, he was eighteen, and I swear he’s grown, like, four inches, and about a million new muscles. His hair was longer then, and he just...he wasn’t like he is now. Not at all.”

  “So you knew him before he was arrested?” Aspen asked.

  I sighed. “I was the reason he was arrested.”

  “Wait.” Noel held up a hand, shaking his head. “He told us he’d served time for rape and murder.”

  “Yeah.” I sniffed and wiped at my wet cheeks. “I was sixteen. He was eighteen. Our families hated each other. When my brothers caught us together, that was it. End of story.”

  Aspen shook her head, slowly. “How is that even remotely the end of the story? And how did he get six years for statutory rape when you two were so close in age? I’ve heard of guys barely getting a slap on the hand for it, but never six years.”

  “And where did the murder part come in?” Noel asked. “Who’d he kill?”

  Falling back in my seat, I hugged myself. “Look, I don’t know most of those answers. They hauled me off, and I barely got to see him one last time before the sheriff arrived and took him away. But I assume my father threatened him or his family somehow to get him to confess to a forcible rape, because that’s what the idiot did, which gave him four years. And then, a few weeks before he was due to be released, he killed two men on the inside. I assume it was self-defense, because he’s not a murderer. I don’t know how he only ended up with two years for that. I just know he’s out now, and I have no idea how it happened, because he was supposed to have over twenty years left.”

  “Wow,” Aspen murmured. “And you’re just now telling me all this?”

  “I didn’t know how to tell you.”

  After blinking a few more times and then blowing out a breath, she nodded. “It’s okay. I haven’t exactly told you everything about myself either.” A blush of guilt crossed her face before she blurted, “I was Noel’s teacher.”

  My mouth fell open. “Huh?”

  “In college. I was his English professor. He was my student.”

  “But...” I shook my head. “How is that possible? Are you even older than him?”

  While Noel barked out a laugh, Aspen blushed. “The point is, I understand your silence. We both needed more time before unloading our bigger secrets on each other.”

  Boy, was she right.

  “I still can’t believe you and Parker...” Noel blew out a breath and shook his head. “Wow. You’re just...not a couple I’d ever imagine paired up.”

  I swallowed, a little crushed to hear that. “He’s a completely different person now than he was then.”

  “So he didn’t rage out and destroy property back when you knew him?”

  I winced. “So you heard what he did to the break room, huh?”

  Noel lifted his eyebrows. “No. I was referring to what he did to Pick’s office Thursday night.”

  After he told me how Knox had given Ten a black eye and destroyed Pick’s desk and computer, I covered my mouth with my hand.

  Maybe this was why he kept pushing me away.

  “You know,” I said. “After some soldiers come home from war, they’re all messed up from being so constantly in fight-mode, thinking of nothing but survival and focusing on the enemy. Maybe...maybe prison was just a different kind of battle.” Glancing at Aspen, I cringed. “He didn’t have that scar before he went in. And he killed two people while he was there. It couldn’t have been pleasant for him.”

  She sent me a sympathetic look and patted my hand. “Sounds like you could be on to something.”

  “Which means you need to stay away from him,” Noel said, his voice stern. “If whatever happened to him left him this unstable, then he’s a danger to himself and everyone around him.”

  I frowned and opened my mouth to defend him, but then I remembered Ten’s bruise, the wildness in Knox’s eyes when he’d been terrorizing the break room. And I remembered the last words he’d said to me last night, that he couldn’t ever be with me, not that he didn’t want to be with me. That he couldn’t.

  Maybe he felt the same way that Noel was suggesting, that he feared he was so unhinged he might be a danger to me.

  I slumped into my chair, not sure how to overcome an obstacle like that. I remembered what Knox was like when he went into his protective mode, and he was fierce about it. If he thought he was guarding me from himself, there may never be a way to break through his stubborn resistance to convince him he didn’t need to.

  “I don’t know what the hell Pick was thinking when he hired him,” Noel grumbled. “Though, okay...he picked up the work fast, faster than anyone else I’ve ever trained.”

  “And he did save Zoey and the baby,” Aspen pointed out.

  Noel blew out a breath. “Honestly, I don’t know what to make of the guy at all, and that makes me suspicious as fuck, so I’m going with...keep a safe distance from him. I’m talking about you when I say that.” When he pointed at me, I narrowed my eyes. “I’m serious, Felicity. You said yourself he’s different now. Don’t go thinking he’s the same boy you once knew and get yourself in trouble.”

  I wasn’t even sure how to answer that. My first instinct was to say Knox would never hurt me.
But I let some of the doubt creep in. Because Noel was watching me so hard, I nodded to let him know I’d heard his warning, but I wasn’t sure yet if I was actually going to heed it.

  When Noel’s cell phone rang from the counter, I was relieved for the reprieve. I wanted to think about this before deciding what I was going to do next.

  “Yep, okay. Will do.” Noel hung up and turned to me. “That was Pick. He wants to see you in his office as soon as possible. And oh, he said to get your damn cell phone charged.”

  “Oh, right.” I’d forgotten I had my charger back now, since Noel had taken me to Cam’s house the day before to pack my things the new girlfriend hadn’t stolen or destroyed.

  Ugh, had that only been yesterday? I’d been too distracted by what had happened last night with Knox to even think about how I was down to half my possessions now. It was really too much to take in. How was a girl supposed to think properly with so much going on?

  “Okay.” I slumped from my chair, glancing at the newspaper sitting on the table and remembering I had to keep searching for a new place to live, too. Oh, and I had to think up a way to repay the Gambles for the car tire they’d gotten fixed for me.

  Five minutes later, I’d coaxed my temperamental car into deciding it wanted to work after all, and ten minutes after that I was pulling into a parking spot in the lot across the street from Forbidden. The place was deserted since it wouldn’t open for hours to come.

  Using my key, I let myself in and strolled through the quiet club to the hall that led to Pick’s office. His door was open, so I knocked as I went in.

  “Ooh, I like the new desk.” It was a lot more modern looking than the heavy oak one he’d had before, and his computer was now a laptop instead of a desktop.

  He shut the laptop he’d been typing on, and sent me a tight smile. “Tink picked it out. I’m still trying to get used to it.”

  “So what’s up?” I seated myself on his couch and relaxed on the plush leather cushions.

  Stretching his hands over his head, he popped his neck from one side to the other. “We’ll get to that in a second. We’re still waiting for one more person to show up. How’ve you been holding up?”

  “Oh…” I wasn’t too sure about that answer, so I shrugged. “Noel helped me move my things from Cam’s place yesterday, so I have…some of my stuff back, all that I’m ever going to get back, anyway. And I look for rentals every morning in the paper, but I haven’t found anything even remotely acceptable in my price range.”

  He nodded, folding his hands together and resting them on the desk. “And everything else?”

  With a sigh, I shook my head. “Ask me again in a month and maybe I’ll have an answer for you.” Not wanting to talk about Knox right now, I asked, “Who’re we waiting for anyway, and what exactly is this about?”

  That’s when Knox appeared in the opened doorway. He stopped short when he saw me.

  “Oh, God.” Popping to my feet, I gaped back in horror. Then I whirled to Pick. “Is this about last night?”

  Pick lifted his eyebrows. “What happened last night?”

  “Nothing,” I was quick to mutter, glad Ten wasn’t as big a gossip as I thought he was. After a quick, uncertain glance Knox’s way, I returned my attention to Pick and cleared my throat. “Why would you want to see the two of us together?”

  Waving Knox the rest of the way into the room, Pick said, “Take a seat.”

  Knox moved about two feet into the room and planted himself, not bothering to sit. So I folded my arms over my chest, remaining on my feet as well.

  Pick sighed. “All right then. I wanted to let you know I found an apartment for you.”

  My eyes widened and elation bloomed inside me. “That’s great!” I’d been searching everywhere and hadn’t found squat. Then I noticed Knox had a slight, confused scowl on his face, and it hit me that he’d been staying with Pick and also needed a place to live. “Wait.” I turned back to Pick. “Which…one of us are you talking to?”

  He drew in a deep breath and then said, “Both of you.”

  My eyebrows shot up. “Wow, you found two places? I couldn’t even find one. Are you sure they’re decent enough, because—”

  “It’s a great place,” Pick assured with a nod. “I checked it out personally this morning. Perfect location, only about five minutes from here, decent price...two bedrooms.”

  I squinted at him, trying to understand why it sounded like he was talking about one place instead of two. Then I shook my head. “I don’t understand. I don’t need a two-bedroom…” Both his expression and Knox’s had my mouth dropping open. “Wait, you don’t...you’re not actually suggesting we—the two of us—” I motioned between Knox and me. “Live together, are you?”

  Pick shrugged. “You’ve always had a roommate before. And the last one was male, so—”

  “Yeah, a male I was dating. Knox and I aren’t—”

  “Hence the two bedrooms,” Pick added.

  “But he hates me.” I pointed to the stony-faced man who hadn’t said a word since he’d come into the office.

  A muscle in his jaw twitched as he glanced my way with a narrowed gaze. “I told you I didn’t.”

  “Oh, so you support this idea? Because last night, you made it perfectly clear you wanted nothing to do with me ever.”

  “Fuck, no. I don’t support this idea.” He seared his glare Pick’s way. “What’re you trying to play here, Ryan?”

  Pick lifted his hands. “I’m not playing anything. You two already work together, you both need a place to stay fairly quickly, and you’re already familiar with each other. It’s the logical solution. You could split all the bills, and—”

  “You need to stop talking right now.” I held up a hand. “Because nothing you’re saying sounds even remotely logical to me.”

  “Look, I’m not trying to talk you guys into getting back together or even being friends. I know a lot of roommates who rarely see each other. You both need this place, and finding something to live in by yourselves is going to be nearly impossible…especially during the school year in a college town.”

  “Is this because you need me out of your apartment?” Knox asked. “Because I’ll go. I’ll head over there and pack my shit right now—”

  “No.” Pick clenched his teeth, beginning to look frustrated. Then he glanced at me. “Can you give us a second alone? Please?”

  I gaped at him, my arms crossed tight over my chest. “To discuss my living arrangements? I don’t think so.”

  “Felicity, just trust me.”

  I let out a disgusted groan and rolled my eyes as I dropped my hands to my sides and then stormed from the office. The last thing I heard was Pick asking Knox to shut the door. Hurrying back to it, I pressed my ear to the wood as soon as it closed, but the damn thing was constructed way too well to hear through.

  I frowned, maybe making out my name, the word locker, and then Knox’s deep voice with the words don’t believe tacked in there. Pick answered him, and Knox growled, “Damn it.”

  A second later, the door flew open, and I tumbled forward, almost plowing flush into Knox’s chest. He pulled back and scowled at me. Once I’d caught my balance and smoothed down my clothes, he said, “We split every expense fifty-fifty. No exceptions.”

  Then he brushed past me and stormed down the hall.

  Unable to believe what I’d just heard, I whirled to Pick as I pointed after Knox. “Did he just...agree to live with me?”

  Pick sent me a satisfied nod. “Yep.”

  “What…how…” I shook my head, totally confused as a small part of me sparked with joy. No matter what the reason was, Knox had agreed to live with me. There really was something in him that didn’t totally hate me.

  I swallowed, overcome with emotion. “What the hell did you say to him?”

  Pick merely smiled, refusing to tell.

  Today was the day. She was back.

  Felicity had gone with her family to their summerhouse over two w
eeks ago, and earlier today, I’d seen their caravan of fancy cars returning home.

  So, maybe I’d been staking out their house every day since they’d left, lingering in the woods closer to their backyard than I usually did in the hopes they might return early. I’d missed her more than I thought was humanly possible. It’d been like a constant niggle just under the breastbone, something I couldn’t scratch away or medicate. I swear, a part of me had been physically missing, and the two sections hadn’t reunited until I’d seen about four different cars pull into the Bainbridge property only three hours ago.

  This girl had gotten under my skin, into my blood, and controlled all the major organs…probably most of the minor ones too. I needed to see her again, have her in my arms and hold her. Talk to her.

  There had been so many times I’d thought of something I’d wanted to tell her. Bentley had reached for a toy, grabbed it, and put it into her mouth for the first time. I’d been all fired to race into the forest and tell Felicity all about it, only to remember she wouldn’t be there. And it had felt as if someone had sliced me opened I missed her so much.

  But today, she was back.

  So, here I loitered at the docks in the hopes she could get away from all her unpacking to come see me so we could catch up.

  If she still wanted to see me.

  I sank my top teeth into my bottom lip with a sudden thought. What if she’d gone to the beach and met some other guy? What if all this time away from me had pushed me out of her mind? What if she never came into the woods to visit me again?

  Tossing a flat rock I’d picked up from the shore into my palm a few times, I eyed the calm strip pit, trying not to worry, and failing. Hating the uncertainty, I wound back my arm and heaved the rock out over the water. It skipped along the surface about a dozen times before sinking.

  From behind me, someone clapped heartily.

  I whirled around, afraid I’d find some other Bainbridge family member, but my breath caught as City stepped onto the ramp.

  “Impressive,” she said, watching me with a shy yet utterly seductive smile. “I’ve never been able to skip a rock that many times.”