Motherfucker!
“Annika, I’m asking you to rethink this.”
There. Two could play that game. Or—technically—four, since there were four bloody thumbprints on that old oath, wherever it was.
Anne flinched, and her hand twitched. She was resisting, and I could practically see how badly she wanted to rub her own forehead. So I tossed her the cool rag.
“Fine. State your case.” She leaned back on the couch and placed the folded rag over her forehead and tear-swollen eyes.
I took a deep breath, but was careful to keep it silent. I didn’t want her to know how important it was for me to get out of the assassin part of the favor she was asking. “I don’t have a problem with your husband’s murderer dying for his crimes.” The state would give him the death penalty anyway, if they could prove his guilt. “And I’m perfectly willing to find him for you. But once he’s found, you need an expert for…whatever comes next. And I’m no assassin, Anne.”
I was an amateur at best….
She sat up, clutching the rag in one hand. “Olivia, I don’t need you to cut his throat with a scalpel and frame the governor’s personal physician. I don’t need the best. Hell, I can’t afford the best. Proficiency will suffice, and fr what I’ve heard, you’re more than proficient.”
What? “I don’t care what you’ve heard, I do not kill people for money!” Much. Anymore.
Not just for money, anyway.
My head throbbed again, but this headache was stress-induced. She wasn’t backing down, and I couldn’t tell her why I needed her to. And thanks to the original oath, I couldn’t just ask her not to ask me to kill someone. Noelle had called that the no-wishing-for-more-wishes clause—like a contractual paradox. It couldn’t be done.
Anne frowned. “But you work for Ruben Cavazos.”
“Freelance. I freelance for Cavazos.” Which was precisely why her request was so dangerous for me. “And for Adam Rawlinson, and for anyone else who can pay.” Except for Jake Tower. Working for both sides of the Skilled black market would be like putting a bullet in my own head—only more prolonged and painful. “But all I do for them is find people.” Usually. “What the client does with the target after that is their business. I don’t get involved with that side of it.” Not without a very good reason—and money doesn’t count.
“So Cavazos doesn’t…own you?” She blinked through her tears, watching me carefully, and if I hadn’t known her most of my life, I might not have realized what she was doing. What she was looking for in my eyes.
Anne was a Reader—a human truth detector—born with an ability most law enforcers worked years to develop. Only her Skill was virtually infallible, and it couldn’t be turned off. Which was why she hadn’t dated much in high school—turns out sometimes ignorance really is bliss. Or at least temporary consolation. Shen must have been the most honest man on the face of the planet.
“Say what you mean, Annika.” I knew what she meant, of course, but… “If you’re going to come in here and pull on the strings of a fifteen-year-old oath, you could at least have the guts to ask me what you really want to know.”
“Fine,” Anne said, and I recognized the rare flash of temper in her eyes. “Olivia, are you bound to Ruben Cavazos? Because that’s what they’re saying about you out there.” She nodded toward the window overlooking the street below. “They’re saying you quit Rawlinson’s team because you’re bound to Cavazos and he’s taking a cut of your freelance fee—along with whatever else he wants from you.”
My temper burned like indigestion, and I fought the need to stand in defense of my reputation—the only real asset a freelance Tracker has. “Who’s saying that?”
Anne glanced at her hands again, stalling. Then she looked at the door I still hadn’t locked. I followed her gaze as the glass panel swung open and Cam stepped in from the hall.
Damn it!
“Lurking in dark hallways?” I said, my hands hidden in my lap to hide how tightly they were clenched. “Isn’t that a little cliché, even for a stalker—I mean Tracker?”
“You wouldn’t have heare in herout if you knew I was here,” he said calmly, and I couldn’t argue.
“You told her I’m bound to Cavazos?” I had to force my jaw to unclench as I stood, leaning with both palms flat on my desktop. “You used to be above spreading unsubstantiated rumors.”
“Those with Skills live and die by the word on the street, Olivia. Especially in this city.”
Yeah. It was that dying part that worried me.
“Look, I may be country mouse in the big city,” Anne started, still seated while Cam and I stood, “but I’m not stupid. I know Cavazos is selling blood and names on the black market, and I know he has his homegrown army out there doing the dirty work.”
But if that was all she knew, she really was country mouse.
“He’s not the only one. Jake Tower has this city by the balls, and everyone west of the river’s so afraid of his men—”
Anne stood, interrupting me smoothly with that same quiet confidence I’d envied in childhood, then hated in adolescence. “What I need to know from you is whether you’re part of that army. Is Ruben Cavazos pulling your strings, Liv?”
“Right now, you’re pulling my strings.” And pushing all the wrong buttons. “You need to back off, Annika. Before I have to push you back.”
“She has a right to know what you’re tangled up in, Liv,” Cam insisted quietly, and I exploded, as always, the roaring fire to his smooth, hard ice.
“Screw her rights. What about mine? You two can’t just ambush me, make me work for you, then question me like a criminal so you can be sure none of my dirt’s going to rub off on you.”
“Ask her to pull her sleeve up,” Cam said to Anne, though his gaze never left mine. “To see if she’s marked,” he added, when she hesitated in obvious confusion.
Anne sighed, but even the weary grief that had moved me earlier couldn’t calm me now. “Are you going to make me ask?” she said softly.
Hell no. I wasn’t going to give her—or anyone else—any more power over me, if I could possibly help it. “You wanna see?” I spat, gathering the hem of my T-shirt in both hands. I jerked the material over my head and dropped it into my chair, then stood watching them both, in only jeans and a bra. “Fine. Look.”
Cam swallowed thickly—the only outward sign that the sight of my bare skin still affected him—then his focus zeroed in on my arm automatically. “Cavazos’s first mark is a small black ring on the left bicep. She’s clean.”
I was clean? As opposed to dirty? “Fuck you!”
Cam flinched, and I recognized the regret that flickered across his expression before he could hide it. “That’s not what I… I just meant…” He closed his eyes while I tugged my shirt back over my head, glad for the half second it shielded me from their scrutiny and judgment.
When I sank iair, dressed, but still pissed, Cam settled onto the arm of the couch. “I made Anne promise to let you out of this if you were bound to one of the syndicates.” Because, having lived in the city almost as long as I had—I was pretty sure he’d followed me there—he understood how dangerous and complicated her favor could make things for anyone sworn to serve on one side of the black-market divide.
It was very…compassionate of him, and it took real effort for me to deny the sudden rush of my own pulse. Because compassion was the last thing I needed from Cam Caballero. “I don’t want your pity, or sympathy, or whatever this is.”
“Fortunately, it looks like you don’t need it,” he said, with another glance at my now covered arm. “So let’s move on.”
Irritated that he seemed to be taking control of things, I turned back to Anne. “I’ll find your husband’s killer, and I’ll take you to him. But you can kill him yourself,” I said, careful not to actually refuse to do the second part of her request.
Anne paled, and Cam stood, scowling at me across my own desk. “No, Olivia.”
“What, she’s brave
enough to come in here demanding vigilante justice, but not brave enough to do the job herself?”
Anne glanced back and forth between us, her purse trembling in her grip, but Cam answered before she could even open her mouth. “She’s never even held a gun. Even if she had any chance of actually pulling this off, can you really send her back to her half-orphaned daughter with blood on her hands?”
His point was subtle, but it still stung. Anne wasn’t like me. We’d started on the same path, sure. Parents, school, friends, college. Then Anne had continued down that path toward a respectable career, civil responsibility and family, while I had jumped the track entirely and derailed my own life with violence, under-the-carpet jobs and solitude.
If I made Anne take the shot herself, I’d be dragging her from her mostly tidy suburban life into the gritty reality of my own existence. Most people can’t commit murder then go on living their lives, even if that murder was actually justice. And I had no doubt Anne was one of those people.
But I was not. And Cam obviously knew that.
“Fine. I’ll do it.” I sighed, finally fully resigned to her request, and the last of the resistance pain faded. “You have a name or a sample of his blood?”
“Well, he didn’t leave a business card,” she snapped, her anger currently winning the battle against grief. “But I can get you several blood samples from the house.” She sniffled, then visibly swallowed tears. “They found Shen holding a bloody knife, so I’m hoping at least one of the blood samples will belong to his killer.”
But that made no sense. Why would a Skilled killer—especially a professional—leave his own blood at the scene? Maybe he was interrupted?
“The police left a huge mess, and obviously I haven’t had time to have it cleaned yet,” she continued.
Obviously? “Annika, when did he die?”
“Tonight.” She froned and glanced out the window, where the first rays of daylight had changed inky black to deep, dark blue. “Last night, I guess.”
“Last night?”
“Around eight o’clock”
“Your husband’s been dead for less than ten hours?” I rubbed my forehead, then let one hand trail though my hair. “Don’t you think you might be reacting before you’ve had a chance to really think about this?”
“No.” For the first time since she’d walked into my office, Anne looked at me as if she didn’t even know me. As if I was just some stranger she’d hired from an ad in the phone book. “And I would rather have this whole thing over with before I go pick up Hadley. I don’t want to have to think about this while I’m trying to decide how best to explain what happened to her father without scarring her for life.”
“Okay.” I didn’t know what else to say—I wasn’t sure rationality would have had much attraction for me, either, in her position. I opened my mouth to name my one condition, but she beat me to the proverbial punch.
“Liv, there’s one more thing…” Anne hesitated, and I knew I wasn’t going to like whatever else she had to say. “I want you to work with Cam.”
I sucked in a long, slow breath, hoping she would deliver the punch line to the world’s worst joke before I had to actually say something. But she only watched me, waiting. “No,” I said finally. “No way.” I turned to Cam for support, but could find no resistance to the idea in his expression. Instead, I found…satisfaction. “This was your idea, wasn’t it?” I demanded
He crossed both arms over a still-broad chest. “Does it matter? Is it going to kill you to work with me on one job? For Anne?”
Yes, it just might kill me. Or him. But there had never been a less appropriate time to explain why I’d left him. Why working with him could be more dangerous than hunting and killing a murderer on my own. And it didn’t help that while my brain protested on the basis of logic, the rest of me ached for this excuse to be near him again, if only in a professional capacity.
But that was a bad idea. The key to resisting Cam Caballero lay in avoiding temptation—a concept he seemed to personify for me more with every glance I avoided, every memory I buried.
“No.” I turned back to Anne, wearing my business face. The one that got me the rates and bonuses I demanded. The one that usually kept creeps off me when I followed criminals down dark alleys and through abandoned buildings. “No. That’s a deal-breaker.”
“There are no deal-breakers when you’re bound,” Cam pointed out calmly, and suddenly I wished I’d hit him when I had the chance. “You’ll do it, or you’ll die trying to resist the compulsion.”
“I haven’t actually asked you yet,” Anne reminded me, echoing the infuriating calm that Cam exuded like radiation—a slow, vicious poison. “But I will if I have to. Your choice.”
“So, I either work with him because you’re asking me to, or I work with him becausere threatening to ask me to. What kind of choice is that?” I demanded.
“It’s better than the choices I’m facing right now. The rest of my day includes picking out a casket and a black suit.”
Another low blow. “Why Cam?” I asked, hoping to talk her out of it before she caught on and actually compelled me.
“Because I’m short on cash but rich on resources, Liv.” Meaning the two of us, of course. “But if you’re willing to subsidize this project financially and you know someone better than Cam, then by all means…” She extended one arm toward the window and the city just now waking up. “So…do you know anyone better than Cam?”
Damn. “Other than me? No.”
Cam laughed out loud. “Still arrogant…”
“Confident,” I corrected. “And willing to back that confidence up with results.”
“Good.” He nodded, in what may have been the first look of respect I’d seen from him in more than six years. “Let’s go.”
“Um…” I hedged. “I have something to take care of first, and we’ll need those blood samples before I can get started.” I glanced at Anne with both brows raised, and she nodded, already standing. “So, I’ll meet you here at noon?”
“Liv, I really want to get this over with,” she repeated.
“I know, but I have a previous commitment.” I hesitated, dreading the next part. “Oh, and…um…I’m going to need a retainer.”
“What?”
“You’re going to charge her?” Cam demanded, and that respect I’d seen was long gone. “She’s your friend.”
I bristled, even though I’d expected—and understood—his reaction. “A friend who’s compelling me to work for her.” And with you. I hated what they probably thought of me now, but I had no choice—a state of events I was starting to truly resent. “You need my help? Fine. But I need a retainer. It doesn’t have to be much. Five or ten bucks. Just…something to make it official.”
Anne looked as if I’d just danced on her dead husband’s grave, but she dug in her purse without a word. Something snapped open, and she handed me a five-dollar bill. “I don’t carry much cash, but I can get you more, later,” she offered, in spite of the hurt clear on her face.
“Don’t worry about it. This is plenty.” I paper-clipped the bill to a blank invoice and stuffed it into my desk drawer. Never in my life had I been more relieved to lose sight of a payment.
As they left my office, Cam glanced at me with a look of confusion and disappointment so strong it burned deep in my chest. But all I could do was stare back and hope he wouldn’t decide to put into words what his gaze was accusing me of.
I hated how he saw me now, and I hated knowing that his opinion of me would only worsen, if I kept my secrets. But my secrets kept him safe, and that was more important than what he thought of the life I’d chosen.
His safety was more important than anything to me. Even if he would never know enough to understand that.
Three
“Well, did that go how you expected?” Anne asked, as Olivia closed and locked her office door behind us.
“Nope.” I sighed and dug my keys from my pocket. “I figured it’d be worse.
Do you believe her? About the Cavazos syndicate?”
“Yeah.” Anne dug her keys from her purse with still-trembling hands. “She’s hiding something, but that’s not it. She’s not a syndicate member.”
I shrugged, trying not to show how relieved I really was. “Yeah, I’m guessing that if he owned a piece of Olivia Warren, he’d want everyone to know it.” And she’d do everything she could to hide it.
The Liv I’d known and loved was beautiful and passionate, with a backbone of steel and a fiery temper. This new Olivia was everything my Liv had been and more. More steel. More fire. She couldn’t truly bend to someone else’s will—Anne had convinced, as much as she’d compelled—and those who wouldn’t bend could only break.
It would kill me to see Liv broken, even after what she’d done.
“You sure you wanna do this?” Anne asked, as I held the stairwell door open for her. “It sounds like she’s pretty good at what she does.”
“So am I. This’ll be easier and faster with us working together.”
But as much as I wanted to help Anne—to know without a doubt, for once, that I’d be taking a murderer off the streets—that wasn’t my primary motivation.
Olivia was the goal.
Sometimes I thought about that night and the months afterward, and I hated her. Then I hated myself, for still wanting her. She was pissed at me for making her show her arm—for making her do anything—but my relief at the sight of her smooth, bare arm was like nothing I’d ever felt. Part joy, part memory and part aching possibility. I couldn’t stand the thought of someone else’s hands on her, much less some asshole’s mark of ownership.
But she wouldn’t talk to me voluntarily, and that left me no choice but to corner her, which Anne had unwittingly helped me do. Now Olivia couldn’t just hang up on me or close the door in my face. Now she’d have to listen to me. She’d have to talk. She’d have to tell me to my face why she’d ruined my life and stolen my future….
“What happened between you two?” Anne asked, clicking a button on her key chain to unlock her car doors. She slid into the driver’s seat and I settled in next to her.