“And it feels good,” Shay said. “That’s the joy. You appreciate the good because of the bad. You don’t want to jump, George. You want to live.”
“You know what I do when I want to jump,” Caleb said.
“What?” George asked eagerly.
“I jump,” he said. “Out of a plane. I skydive.”
George’s eyes went wide. “Skydive,” he said. “That’s crazy. What if the chute doesn’t open?”
“You don’t have a chute standing on that ledge,” Caleb said. “The way I look at skydiving is…if I’m supposed to survive—if I still have a purpose on this earth—the chute will open. If not, then it won’t.” George looked intrigued, and Caleb quickly offered, “I own a skydiving operation in San Marcus. If you want to test my chute theory, we can go now. You can watch some videos and do a little paperwork, and then jump in a few hours. And you’ll have your answer—to live or not to live.”
George looked at Shay. “Will you jump with me?”
Shay’s breath lodged in her throat. Both men stared at her, waiting for an answer to the same question Caleb had asked days before. Would she jump?
18
WILL YOU JUMP WITH ME?
George’s question hung in the air like a hammer about to drop. Caleb had done a lot of thinking about why he’d pressed Shay to jump with him three days before, because he wasn’t one to push people out of their comfort zone, certainly not Shay. At least, not outside the bedroom. And now, here, in this moment, he knew why. He’d wanted something to show him that, while she might not be willing to tell her family about their relationship, he was worth a risk, worth fighting for. But she hadn’t jumped, she hadn’t even stayed to talk to him after his jump.
“I’m terrified to jump, George,” she said, holding her patient’s stare. “But if it will get you down from there, I’ll do it.”
George scrutinized her, as if deciding whether he should believe her, before jumping to the ground in front of Caleb and Shay. “I’m ready,” he told Caleb, and started walking toward the door.
Shay’s gaze shifted to Caleb’s, trepidation in her expression. “I had to say yes.”
“I know,” he said. And he did know. That had been the entire point of asking her to jump. He’d wanted her to make a choice—in his case, not to save his life but to save their relationship. To be willing to step out of her comfort zone, a way to reach out to him that she’d not been willing to offer. Maybe it was wrong of him, probably it was wrong of him, but he needed to know. And, well, he would risk anything for her, but he wasn’t sure it would be enough anymore.
His lips thinned with the thought and he said, “George is waiting.”
Once they were in the parking lot, Caleb wasn’t about to let George out of their sight until he was certain he was stable. Nor was he leaving George alone with Shay. He’d seen a few suicidal guys in Iraq turn on people close to them. “Let’s take my truck,” Caleb suggested. “That’ll let you two talk, and neither of you will have the distraction of driving.”
Fortunately, George agreed, and was soon seated by the passenger’s door, pulling it shut, while Shay scooted to the middle. Caleb climbed into the driver’s seat beside Shay, but he didn’t look at her. He could feel her close, her body heat rushing over him, her scent teasing him, and that was enough. She was where he’d wanted her. Where he’d believed she belonged. Still did, but now…well, now he wasn’t so sure that was where she would end up.
The drive was short and Shay kept George talking. Caleb was impressed with how she framed her views, how she led him to see logic over emotion.
Once inside the Hotzone, Caleb led George and Shay to a private training room and set up the videos to allow George to complete the paperwork to jump alone.
“Shay’s jumping tandem with me,” Caleb said without asking Shay. “She doesn’t need all the paperwork you will need.” Shay was scared, and he wasn’t risking her getting hurt by forcing her to jump alone.
Shay’s gaze connected with his, the charge of awareness and tension between them damn near combustible. There was no way George didn’t notice.
George frowned. “But I can for sure jump on my own?” he confirmed, sitting down at the metal table.
“That’s right,” Caleb agreed. “But it’s going to be pretty late by the time you finish all the training. I need to go lock in a pilot for the plane.” His gaze flickered over Shay’s slim-cut skirt, with miles of gorgeous legs exposed from beneath, and added, “And I’ll need to find Shay something to wear. High heels and skydiving don’t mesh too well.”
Shay looked down at herself. “I can’t believe I didn’t think of that. Do I need to run home and change?”
“No,” George said. “You can’t leave me here.”
“Sabrina and Jennifer both have flight suits and boots here,” he said. “You’re are all close to the same size. I’m sure neither will mind if you wear theirs.” He tapped the table where George sat. “You study and before long, I’ll show you what jumping is really all about.”
He motioned to Shay to follow him, pulling the door shut behind him once they were in the hall. “I need to line up that pilot.” He didn’t give her time to respond. The rawness of her rejection of days before had worn on him, tormented him. He turned away.
She reached for him, the touch of her hand jolting him in a way no woman should ever be able to jolt a man.
“Caleb,” she said.
Unnerved by how much Shay got under his skin, he didn’t give her time to voice whatever she’d hoped to say. “You know where the storage room is, right?”
“I…” She hesitated, apparently changing her mind about what she’d been about to say. “Yes. I know where it is.”
“Grab something to change into while I line up what I need to for the jump.” He left, going in search of Ryan, who, in his usually easygoing way, had already agreed to join their jump—if they could get a pilot to hang around.
He found Ryan and Bobby in Bobby’s office, just back from a sunset jump. “We got a pilot?” he asked Ryan.
Ryan cast him a grim look. “No go,” he said. “Everyone has plans.”
Caleb eyed Bobby. “Can you fly us out for a jump, man?”
“If you can’t get someone else,” Bobby said, “I’ll do it. But tonight is Jennifer’s mom’s birthday, and her dad’s planned a surprise party.”
“Damn,” Caleb murmured.
“I can fly you out,” Ryan said. “I’m sure we can get one of the other instructors to help with George.”
“This guy was on a ledge about to jump a few hours ago,” he said. “If he decides not to pull his chute, some one has to pull it for him. Ryan’s the man for that job.”
Ryan grinned. “You know I do love a little extra action with my dirt dives.”
“What’s J.C.’s excuse for not staying?” he asked, referring to their most senior pilot, an old Army buddy of Bobby’s.
“Would you believe he has defensive driving?” Bobby asked. “I know. Not comforting that he needs it, considering he’s our lead pilot.”
“Damn it,” Caleb said, running his hand over his face and thought of their newest pilot. “What about Mark?”
“Sent him home early today, and he’s not answering his phone,” Ryan said.
“I might know someone,” Shay said from the doorway.
Caleb turned to find Shay still dressed in her skirt and heels. “Not you,” he said.
“Of course not,” she said. “I don’t have my license yet. But my instructor does, and she’s retired Air Force. Sabrina knows her.”
“Is that Lori Dew?” Ryan asked.
“Lori Day,” Shay corrected.
“Right,” Ryan said. “Sabrina talked to me about her, trying to convince me we should hire her and add flight lessons to the Hotzone offerings.”
“Lori is amazing, and I trust her completely, which says a lot considering she often has my life in her hands,” Shay said. “I can’t promise I can reach her, but it?
??s worth a try.”
“I say call her,” Ryan said. “Then I can tell Sabrina I officially met her and considered her idea of the flight school. Kills two birds with one stone.”
Caleb and Bobby eyed each other and came to a silent agreement. “Call her,” Caleb said.
Shay nodded and rushed to the phone in the front lobby. Caleb half listened to Bobby and Ryan debate the idea of adding a flight school, but was more interested in trying to make out Shay’s conversation.
“She’ll do it,” Shay said, popping back into the room, “but her brother is in from out of town and took her car out for the night. She needs a ride. I just sent Kent to get her, but he wants to jump with us.”
“Of course he does,” Caleb said. Now he had a suicidal man, a pilot he didn’t know, a gambling addict and Shay—the woman who twisted him like barbed wire—to juggle all at once. Thank God Ryan was coming along because this was going to be one hell of a night.
“I’m going to go meet Mr. Wanted-to-jump-off-a-building myself,” Ryan said. “If I might be saving his life tonight, it seems fitting I introduce myself first.” He headed to the door, and Shay blocked his exit.
“You aren’t going to say anything like that to him, are you?”
“Me?” Ryan asked. “Say something inappropriate? Never.” He snorted. “Okay. Not this time.”
Shay didn’t move, and he added, “I joke around, but I don’t play with people’s lives.”
Shay apparently accepted that answer. She stepped aside to let him pass. Ryan lingered and said, “No wonder Jennifer and Sabrina like you so much.”
“What does that mean?” Shay asked. “No wonder they like me so much?”
Ryan laughed. “You’ll figure it out.”
Bobby sauntered toward Shay. “He meant you don’t take any crap, and you know how to hand it out. Two things both Jennifer and Sabrina excel at.” He put a hand on Caleb’s shoulder. “Later, man. Call me if there are any disasters. Preferably after you’ve fixed them all.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Caleb said. “Get the hell out of here and go see your woman.”
Bobby laughed, gave Shay a little salute and then headed out, leaving Caleb alone with her.
He cast her a quick inspection. “What happened to changing clothes?”
“I couldn’t find the flight suits you were talking about.” Hesitantly, she added, “I think I have clothes left at your place. I could run over there and change.”
“You don’t,” he said and walked past her, not sure if he was right or wrong on that point and not caring. She didn’t want to be at his place, so she wasn’t going to his place. “Let’s get you that flight suit.”
HE WAS ANGRY ABOUT her jumping, and Shay didn’t understand why. But she was going to. She was going to right now. Shay stalked after Caleb, not about to let this tension-ridden communication—or, rather, lack of communication—continue.
By the time she caught up with him, he was already in the small storage room, the dim overhead light guiding his search for the flight suits. Shay stood there, studying his profile, and her heart swelled with the feelings she had for this man. Anger faded into something deeper, softer. He’d been there for her today, brave and strong—her hero in so many ways.
“Caleb,” she said hoarsely. He turned to face her, so tall and broad, and perfect to her. His eyes were unreadable, his jaw, firm. And Shay forgot what she wanted to say.
He hung a flight suit on the rack near her. “They were shoved way in the back,” he said. “No wonder you couldn’t find one.” He bent down and grabbed a pair of boots, setting them down close to her. He opened another locker and grabbed some socks. “Those are my socks. You won’t fit the boots with pantyhose. Don’t worry. They’re clean.” It was a joke but neither of them laughed.
There was a serious note in the air, awareness riddled with tension that Shay desperately wanted to erase. “Thank you for being there for me today.”
“That’s what family is for,” he said softly.
The words hit her like a blast of cold air. “Is that what we are now? Family?”
“I thought that was the point in all of this,” he said. “I’m trying to give you what you want.”
“All of this,” she repeated. “You mean us.” It wasn’t a question.
“That’s right,” he said. “Family sticks together, but they don’t sleep together. I think that might be a bumper sticker in a few Texas counties.”
There was bitterness beneath the words. She heard it, felt it. It was the first time she’d ever heard bitterness from Caleb, and she’d been the one to put it there. She’d hurt him, and that wasn’t her intention.
“Caleb,” she said, stepping toward him. “I—”
“Shay!” Ryan called. “Oh, Shay. Georgie boy is really needing a you-fix.”
Shay wanted to scream at the timing, and because she so desperately needed some connection with Caleb. She pressed her hand to his chest. She could feel his heart race under her touch, and it gave her hope. She lifted her gaze, all but melting in the heat of his stare, and whispered, “I don’t want to lose you.”
“Shay! Ah, there you are.” Ryan had arrived at the storage room, and Shay turned to face him as he added, “Sorry to interrupt you two lovebirds, but George demands your presence. Well, it was more a whimper. Either way, he needs you.”
Caleb’s hands came down on her shoulders. “Stay here and change. I’ll keep him company until you’re ready.” He maneuvered around her, his body brushing hers. And then, the all-too-familiar feeling of Caleb being gone and of her being left to wonder about the next time, which might never come.
LORI DAY HAD ARRIVED just in time for George to finish up his training and was now behind the wheel of their Beechcraft King Air C90G plane. Caleb came aboard and leaned into the cockpit.
Kent was there. “I’m riding up front instead of jumping,” he said. “Thinking about taking flying lessons from Lori.”
Right. Flight lessons. Funny how he’d never felt that urge until he met Lori. Caleb eyed Lori. “You got a handle on these wings?”
She cast him a scathing look. “If it flies, I can handle it.”
“That’s what I wanted to hear,” he said and left her to check her equipment, thinking Kent was in trouble because the last time he’d seen him as taken with a woman as he was with Lori, she’d been the principal’s daughter. And like the principal’s daughter, a twelve-year Air Force chick had the power to bust balls. But she was a distraction, and better that Lori bust his balls than a bookie’s goons.
Caleb hopped to the ground in front of Shay. George stood off to the side and listened to Ryan tell an Army story as only Ryan could tell it—colorfully. George was actually laughing, while Shay was pale and looked like she wanted to be sick. But still, she was going to jump.
Caleb discreetly pulled her aside. “Tell George you’re afraid of heights, Shay.” She looked surprised that he knew. “Don’t look surprised. Of course, I know. And that’s why you’re taking flying lessons. You want to take control of your fear.”
“How can I urge him to face his fears, to use today as a way to move forward, if I can’t do it? Besides, three days ago you wanted me to jump with you. And you weren’t happy when I refused.” She lowered her voice. “Why, Caleb?”
“Are we ready?” Lori shouted, poking her head out of the plane.
“About time,” Ryan replied, slapping George on the back. “George is getting all fidgety on me over here.”
Saved by the bell, Caleb thought, because this wasn’t the time or place for this conversation. “If you have anything you want to say to George, now would be the time.”
She paled. “I can’t believe I’m about to do this,” she said. “I don’t know if I can do this.”
“Ready, Doc?” George asked, rushing up to her side.
“Are you ready?” Caleb asked George, settling his arm around Shay’s waist, trying to calm her. “This is that live-or-die moment we’re headed toward.”
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George nodded in earnest. “I know,” he said. “I know.”
“We went to a lot of trouble to let you jump tonight, George,” Caleb said. “So when you live through this, and you will, then you live. No more ledges. You get the urge to jump again, you come here, and you can jump with the Aces. I need that commitment from you.” He offered George his hand.
George stared at it a moment, and then shook. “You have it.”
“Over here, George,” Ryan called.
George eyed Shay. “You okay, Doc?”
She nodded and smiled weakly. “I’m fine.” She made a “go” movement with her hand. “See you in the plane.”
The minute he was gone, Caleb said, “Not only is there an auto-pull on his chute, but Ryan is both capable and prepared to deal with an in-air complication. He’ll be fine.” He leaned close, feeling her shake. “Easy, sweetheart. Sure you’re up to this?”
She leaned into him. “I’ll be with you,” she said. “I’ll be okay.”
His heart squeezed with the words. He wanted her to trust him, but then, she did—with her body. Just not with what he really wanted—her heart.
The next several minutes passed in a fury of engine and wind. Shay stood in front of Caleb, and he strapped them together, molding her body to his. After some stress and nudging from Ryan, George cast Shay a look before giving her the thumbs-up and jumping. Ryan followed.
Caleb whispered to Shay, “Last chance.”
She pulled her goggles down in answer. He didn’t give her time to think after that. It would only make it worse. He did a final harness check, ensuring she was secured against him, and then jumped. The wind gusted around them, and he could feel Shay stiffen against his body. Within seconds, he’d pulled the chute and had them under cover.
The fall slowed, the view of the Austin downtown lights shining gloriously in front of them. Caleb reached out and pulled her arms to the side, molding them together as one in flight. Letting her know he had her, she was safe. He pointed out a few lights, smiling when she actually responded with an excited wave of her hand.