Her cravings were nigh unbearable. It was in the way that he looked at her. His eyes were always cutting discs of amber thickly rimmed with hazel. Not that he meant to regard her so harshly. When he smiled, his eyes softened. He always smiled at her. Yet that smile bore a longing that she couldn't comprehend.
Why did he pace the living room so? Why couldn't he rest in the bed? Was it her?
Ellia couldn't decipher Aluric. He was the hero. He was the manifestation of a brave man as if from an epic, a myth, a faerie tale. The man who slew dragons and rode off into the sunset with the girl.
Was she not that woman? Had she not accompanied him, helped him?
They shared the master bedroom, though she kept a two bedroom apartment. It was for the better, she figured, because like most men when he wanted his space, he went into the second room and shut the door.
He did that often. It was as though he lived in his own little world: music blaring, lights flickering from under the door. She had gone in there when he departed in the morning to go see Naeyr. There wasn't anything special in there. A bed, a tele, some games.
Except that he kept notes. They were scrawled in a language she didn't understand. She never understood their language, when he and Naeyr talked in it.
Maybe tonight he'd give her some insights. Yes, certainly he'd want to. What man didn't fess up when a woman tickled him the right way?
She lit candles, and made sure the sheets were perfect, that the cover was just right. After lowering the blinds she ducked into the second bathroom. He'd been showering in the first lav, and as she put on her lingerie, the sound of the bedsprings signaled that he'd flopped into bed.
Ellia fussed with her night gown. A shimmering royal purple with a reddish gleam. She smiled. He cocked his brow. She climbed into bed and straddled his hips.
Would he remember? Was Jaime's existence still part of his memory?
She splayed her hands over his chest and leaned forward. "I will do anything," she whispered in his ear, "For your love."
He smiled, those eyes were soft. His hands rode up her sides, pushing the gown up, revealing pink with black lace: the bra that held her supple breasts in place. He didn't seem to mind the stocking-like fabric, also dark, that hugged her curves; or the thigh-high socks she had worn.
She thought the first thing that would snatch his attention was the bright pink, black, and gold butterfly thong. The butterfly hugged her hips, while the string exposed her butt.
"Truly, you're gorgeous," he said.
She smiled. This was happening.
This was so —
He pulled the gown back down. She gave him a pouted look. His gentle smile didn't change.
Why? "You don't want me?"
"I can't."
What was that supposed to mean, 'I can't'?
She leaned down to kiss him. He turned his head to the side. She wasn't about to lay her lips to his cheek. She sat up, and dismounted. Blood must've rushed to her face and made her redden. Because he scrunched his visage with worry, with concern. She was hot.
"Ellia…"
"What does that mean? 'I can't'?"
"Just what it sounds like. You're an amazing woman. But I can't do this with you. I wish I could, but I'm in capable of it."
"Does your dick not work?"
He chuckled, shook his head. "You're not the one I want to take with me."
"'Take with you'?"
He nods. "Listen, Yatomites have their own set of Social Ethics that functions as intergalactic law. There are specific stipulations regarding relationships such as 'marriages' and other 'legally binding forms of union'. They're in place for the emotional well-being and protection of individuals involved, and the rights associated with that binding union, depending on the type and species involved."
"Aluric —"
"I'm the first of my kind, not as a human, but as a 'subset' of humanity. Whoever I engage sexually becomes the one that I'm bound to. They come with me to the Alien Universe, this Yrell Aiene Tautom. Whatever we end up being individually, when we become a combined pair, that's what the 'offshoot' will be."
"So why not me?"
"Because I don't yet know what I am."
"We can discover that together!"
"Ellia."
"I can go with you still. I can be your helper, your complement."
"Ellia, stop, please."
"I — I… Aluric, I want you. I love you."
"I — don't — love you."
She stared, shocked.
"After all we've been through, I don't love you."
"How? Why?"
"You tricked Jaime. That's why I'm here. You were too curious of the outcome, and you manipulated him to the end that he did something he didn't want to do."
"Aluric, I —"
He put his finger to her parted lips. "True he was a coward. He was still a life. Ellia, you're a deceiver and a murderer."
She kept quiet.
"What torments me about his existence is that he'll never come back. I'll never have the chance to do him right. There is no 'justice' for him. So how could I possibly love you?" He rolled out of bed, and went into the second bedroom. He shut the door.
She cradled her head in her hands. She slumped forward on the bed, muffling her cries, soaking the pillows with her weeping.
The next morning, Naeyr was on the third floor, peering into the offices and holding individual conferences with the lawyers in her employ. It was important to know that things were running smoothly. As smooth as it could get when accounting for human imperfection on a world that, just a couple days ago, had its rules and regulations handed to it from the mouth of…
Well, the past wasn't worthy of remembrance.
Or was it?
She shushed her lawyer when she spotted Ellia. Her briefcase was clutched to her breasts and her head was down.
"One moment." She got up, exited the office, and peered into Ellia's. "Everything okay?"
"Yes," Ellia said, her voice choked.
"Come on now, you're talking to an omniscient alien."
She kept silent.
"It's Aluric, isn't it."
Her expression worsened.
Naeyr invited herself to Ellia's desk. "Honey, I'm sorry. At least he told you why."
"You're suddenly so compassionate."
"I understand your pain."
Ellia rolled her eyes. "Like you've ever been human. Truly human. Not just some powerful alien in human form."
"I know that women who crave their male partners hunger for them fiercely. But not every woman gets to be 'the girl.' We don't always get to ride off into the sunset with 'him'. Embrace it. Aluric isn't your partner, and be glad that he isn't."
"Why should I be grateful for not obtaining the creature of my affection —"
"'Obsession'," Naeyr corrected. "What would you do if you did 'obtain' him? Settle down? Have children?"
"Yes. Is that wrong?"
"Of course not." Naeyr closed her eyes a moment, sighed, then peered into Ellia. "Some people simply aren't meant for that. He's driven by what we call A'est Syvadhe: 'Eternal Wonders', and no woman will be able to take that out of him. To make him settle and have a quiet life will cause him torment and unrest. He'd forsake you, and all his children in the matter of a few years."
The clack of hooves drew Ellia to the window. Naeyr sensed her heart thrashing.
"You'll be staying late," Naeyr said.
Ellia turned, she was fraught with anxiety. It showed on her face.
"It's for your own good."
"Will he be back?" Ellia asked, her voice high in pitch, and quivering. She was yet on the brink of tears.
Naeyr stuffed her hands in her pockets.
"I'm sorry." She began to weep again. "Tell him that I'm sorry. Please. If you're truly omniscient, tell him. Ask him to forgive me!"
"He already has."
It was 1 AM when Ellia finally returned home. Her heart was pounding as she slid the key into the lock, and the tum
blers rolled back. Save for the sound of the anchorwoman on the tele chuckling with the anchorman, the place was silent.
She went to the fridge first. There was honeyed ham and snap peas with the ends cut, a side of mashed potatoes and mushroom gravy. She took the plate and warmed it. He had made dinner for her.
How kind.
She turned the tele off. He must've been asleep, as the door to the second room was shut. So he had come back.
She sighed, relieved. With dinner in her hand she ducked into the master bedroom. It was lukewarm at best. Still, it satisfied the grumbling in her stomach. But not the anxious knots. Her guts were twisting uncontrollably. Or at least, that's what it felt like.
She lay her head on the pillow. Tomorrow was another day. She'd speak to him early in the morning, before he did something rash; before he decided to take off.
Naeyr was wrong. She had to be.
That morning arrived the same as always. She had slept in by accident. After getting dressed she went to go make breakfast for the two of them. The smell drew him out, always did. He loved food.
She waited. He didn't come out of his room. Was he still upset with her?
"Aluric!" she called out.
No answer.
"Aluric?" Did something happen? Was he still asleep? She went to the second bedroom. Her heart stopped, and a cold chill bolted up her spine as she took hold of the knob and twisted it.
The door creaked open. "Aluric?" Her voice was quiet.
Everything that had been in his room was the same. Untouched, just the way he liked things, with everything in its proper place. Except for something new:
A note. A simple sliver of paper.
It bore his likeness, his handwriting.
She took one look at it, and crumbled to her knees.
'Don't follow me.'
From S. R. Laubrea
Hello!
If you're interested in contacting me with questions, comments, or just want to chit-chat, feel free to email me at
[email protected] Thanks again,
Shiri R. Laubrea
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