He spoke of Morgan’s kindness, of how fair he was, and of how much Morgan loved Verania, how he would have done anything for king and country.
He spoke of Morgan’s strength and power, saying that Morgan had never used his magic in an unjust way. That he protected those who could not protect themselves.
He spoke of Morgan’s friendship, and for a moment his voice broke when he said that losing his wizard was like losing a piece of himself, and he knew that no matter how long he lived, no matter what came next, it was a void that could never be filled.
And then he said, “Morgan of Shadows was many things. The King’s Wizard. My friend and brother. A good, just man. He was bright and funny, sarcastic and sassy when he needed to be. He was a protector and wiser than most of us combined. But if there was one thing he was above all else, one thing he believed himself to be above all his other roles, it was this: he was a mentor.”
The gazes of Verania shifted to me.
Damn him.
“Morgan of Shadows gave his life to protect the one he loved above all others,” the King said. “Many of you might not understand why he did what he did. Some of you might downright hate the decisions he made. But know this: Morgan has been by my side for decades. If he were called upon to lay down his life for his apprentice—for Sam—he would do it again, and again, and again.”
I bowed my head, breath hitching in my chest.
“And know that I would do the same,” the King said, voice stern. “Because I know that Sam of Wilds would do the same for me. And if I have my way, as soon as Randall returns, I will be asking him to appoint Sam of Wilds as the King’s Wizard.”
My head shot up as the crowd gasped.
The King extended his hand toward me.
I stared at it.
“Just take it,” Justin whispered in my ear. “Seriously, don’t been an asshole.”
I turned to glare at him.
He rolled his eyes and shoved me toward his father.
This was wrong.
I hadn’t earned this.
I hadn’t passed the Trials.
I’d failed to collect the last dragon.
I hadn’t beaten Myrin.
Randall had disappeared.
Morgan had sacrificed himself for me.
And Ryan….
“I believe in you,” the King said in a quiet voice, hand still held toward me. “That has never wavered. You may not believe in yourself, but I believe in you. I am asking you to trust me.”
For a moment I considered running back the way I’d come.
Instead I took the hand of the King.
He smiled softly at me. I took a step forward to stand at his side.
He said, “Morgan’s sacrifice will not be in vain. The memory of him will never fade. He will be remembered for the man that he was. A wizard. A brother. A mentor. A friend.”
He squeezed my hand.
“Sometimes villains rise. Heroes fall. But we won’t allow those who gave their lives for us to be forgotten. And those that have taken from us, those that have dared to stand before us and strike at our hearts, know this: you have made a grave mistake. Your actions have led to a declaration of war. You have awoken a slumbering beast, and I, as the King of Verania, will harness it to its full potential. This marks the beginning of your end.”
He raised our joined hands, and the people of Verania roared.
I felt like a fraud.
I WILL do what I can, but he will be stronger than me. You must do what is right, Sam of Wilds. You must do what is necessary, even if your heart is breaking.
“ANY CHANGE?” a voice asked from behind me.
I didn’t bother turning around, just shook my head. I didn’t want to take my eyes off the unconscious man in front of me. His skin was sallow and his eyes a little sunken. His lips were cracked, but his heart was steady and his breaths even.
“What did the healers say?” Gary asked, rubbing his snout on the top of my head.
I halfheartedly tried to push him away. “That they don’t know when he’ll wake up.” Or if had been implied, but I couldn’t bring myself to say it aloud.
“He be okay,” Tiggy said, going to his knees on the other side of Ryan’s bed in the healing ward in the lower level of the castle. He reached out and brushed a large finger over Ryan’s forehead and the tip of his nose. “HaveHeart for life, motherfuckers.”
“HaveHeart for life,” I echoed hoarsely.
Tiggy hummed a little under his breath.
“Any news from Randall?” I asked.
Gary shook his head. I wasn’t surprised. “It’s only been five days,” Gary said. “He’s going to be fine. He’ll come back when he can.”
“Unless Myrin consumed him too.”
Gary winced, and I almost felt bad about it. “Maybe a little optimism, huh?”
I snorted. “That’s almost funny, coming from you.”
“Yes, well, I try.”
I squeezed Ryan’s hand, willing him to open his eyes, to look up at me and tell me what to do.
He didn’t. The healers said it was possible he could hear us and that talking to or around him helped.
I didn’t really know what to say.
“You eating?” Tiggy asked.
I shrugged.
“You eat,” Tiggy insisted. “Or you die.”
“I’m not going to die because I missed a few meals, dude.”
“I bring you food?”
“You don’t have to—”
“I bring you food.”
“No, really, you don’t have to—and you’re already gone.”
“He’s worried about you,” Gary said.
“He does that.”
“We all are.”
“I’m fine.”
“I don’t think you are, but okay. Keep telling yourself that.”
“Gary. Don’t.”
“Yeah, because that’s ever worked on me before. It’s like you don’t even know me. Tell me don’t and I just make it my mission to do.”
“I don’t need this right now, okay?”
“No,” he said, suddenly sounding as angry as I’d ever heard him. “Not okay, Sam.”
“Gary—”
“It’s not just you.”
I blinked at him.
“It’s not just you that’s hurting,” he repeated fiercely. “We all loved Morgan. We all love Ryan. Maybe not in the same way as you do, but just as much. You have locked yourself away to the point where I can’t tell what you’re thinking. You’ve never been like that before. It’s not fair that you do that to us. Not now. Not after everything.”
“Not fair? Are you out of your godsdamn mind? Do you want to talk about fairness, Gary? Fairness is—”
“Sam, I am a hornless gay unicorn in my late seventies. Do you really think I am going to start taking your bullshit now? Because if you do, honeybunch, you are sorely mistaken. I have not put nearly a decade of work into you to have you start acting like a fucking dickbag. I won’t stand for it. I really will not.”
“But—”
“Shut it.”
“You can’t just—”
“Sam. Shut. It.”
“Oh my gods. I hate you so much right now.”
“Keep telling yourself that, princess.”
“I’m not a fucking princess.”
Gary rolled his eyes. “This is what’s going to happen. In a minute, you are going to hug me and you are going to cry. You are going to let it all out, because that’s what you need. And once that’s all done, you are going to eat the food that Tiggy brings you, and then you are going to go to bed. You will sleep all fucking night, and if I have to sit by your bed to make sure it happens, then I will. And then tomorrow, we are going to get up, we are going to be sad over the friends that we’ve lost, and we are going to have hope for those that are still here. And then, when an appropriate amount of time has passed, we are going to smile again, we are going to laugh again, and we are going to find Myrin and
kick his ass so godsdamn hard that he forever regrets fucking with us. And when all is said and done, we are going to find my fucking horn, because I am sick and tired of having this bony fucking nub on the top of my head, do you understand me?”
I nodded dumbly.
“Good. Now. Let go of your sexy knight for a little bit so we can begin.”
I set Ryan’s hand at his side.
I turned around.
Gary was there, big and warm, and when I hugged him, when I wrapped my arms around his neck, I did exactly what he asked of me.
I cried.
For Morgan.
For Randall.
For Myrin.
For Ryan Foxheart, the dreamiest dream to have ever been dreamed.
Tiggy came back eventually, and he gathered both of us in his arms, whispering how much he loved us, how he would always be there to take care of us, and please, Sam, please don’t be sad.
We stayed there, together, for a long time.
Eventually I ate.
Eventually I slept.
I dreamed of Randall. He told me I had to do what was necessary.
“IT WON’T hold me,” Ruv said.
I looked through the bars of his cell in the dungeon. It was one of the cells in the very back, the ones meant for wizards. It dampened their magic. He was neutered. Useless.
“It’s doing a pretty good job so far,” I said dryly.
“He won’t let it. Eventually he’ll come for me.”
“Maybe,” I said. “And maybe he’ll even get you. But it won’t be for long.”
Ruv smiled at me. “I liked you. I really did. I think… well. I thought there could be something between you and I.”
“Eh. Couple of things against that. One, I already have a cornerstone. Two, you’re a villain with a mouthful of crazy. Kind of knocks you out of the running, dude.”
“Maybe you’ll change your mind.”
“Doubtful. What’s Myrin’s plan?”
The smile widened. “To burn Verania to the ground and then rise from its ashes like a phoenix of old. It will be remade in his image. And there is nothing you can do to stop it.”
“Watch me.”
His smile faltered.
He took a step back.
I turned and walked away.
“You’ll see, Sam!” he shouted after me. “Soon, you will witness what he is truly capable of.”
And then he laughed.
“WE’LL FIGURE it out,” Dad said, arm wrapped around my shoulders.
“Together,” Mom said, placing her hand on my knee.
Even if your heart is breaking, I thought.
“I CAN’T be what you need me to be,” I said. “Not yet. It would be better if it was Randall. For now.”
“Randall’s not here,” the King said, a frown on his face.
“He will be,” I said. “I’m not ready. There is still so much I need to learn.”
“I believe in you, Sam,” the King said, taking my hand in his. “I always have. And I always will.”
My heart was very full, and I couldn’t find the words to tell him so.
A PAGE delivered a sealed note.
It was brief.
The script was flowery, written in pink ink.
I’ll find a way to make this right.
Lady Tina DeSilva
“YOU’RE PLANNING something,” Justin said, staring at me suspiciously.
I shrugged. “I’m always planning something.”
“What are you going to do?”
I looked away. “Would you….”
“What is it?”
“If something were to happen to me, would you—just. Could you keep an eye on Ryan? For me?”
“Sam,” he said slowly. “Nothing’s going to happen to you.”
I smiled at him. It felt thin and brittle. “Yeah. I know.”
He hugged me then. Out of nowhere. It was a fierce thing, his arms around me tight and strong, his chin on my shoulder.
It took me a moment, but eventually I hugged him back.
“Dude,” I whispered. “Best. Hug. Ever.”
“Shut up, Sam,” he muttered near my ear. “Yeah. I’ll keep an eye on him. But you’d better not do anything stupid, you hear me?”
“Because we’re best friends 5eva?”
For a moment, I didn’t think he’d respond. But then he said, “Fine, yes, best friends 5eva, gods, I will never say that again.”
I loved my Prince.
I STOOD in the empty labs.
They echoed with the ghosts and memories of my mentor.
The greatest wizard who had ever lived.
I wiped my eyes.
I didn’t have time to mourn.
Not now.
I took what I needed, filling a small pack. It wasn’t much. I didn’t think it needed to be.
I was about to leave when something caught my eye.
I stopped, unsure of what to do.
Morgan was gone.
So they would be mine now. I didn’t even know how Myrin’s came to be here. Probably Randall’s doing.
I didn’t want them.
But I thought I needed them anyway.
After a brief moment of hesitation, I made up my mind.
The pack was heavier with the Grimoires inside.
I shut the door to the labs behind me.
Epilogue: A Decision Made
ONCE UPON a time in the Kingdom of Verania, there was a kickass boy born in the slums of the City of Lockes. His parents were hardworking, and at times life could be difficult, but they were alive and had all their teeth. Which was very important.
This boy, this somewhat strange and lonely boy, would grow up and give his lightning-struck heart away to a brave and beautiful knight.
After a series of wacky misadventures, they fell in love and things were good.
Then darkness came.
And the boy made a decision.
Because, you see, this boy had a destiny of dragons written in the stars by the very gods themselves. It was said that he would need to collect the five dragons of Verania in order to combat the darkness that rose in the shadows.
The boy did his best.
In the end, even his best wasn’t good enough.
He was warned it would hurt when it came.
That it would burn like no other.
And still he hadn’t prepared himself.
His lightning-struck heart felt cleaved in two.
But the choice he made next was not born of grief and anger, as they sometimes are.
No, the strange and somewhat lonely boy made his decision because the world was so much bigger than his grief. Than his anger.
If he let it go, if he let the darkness rise, then the people of his country would know exactly how he felt.
And he wouldn’t wish that on anyone.
And so he waited until late into the night, when the moon was high and the stars were bright. He hoisted a pack over his shoulder and slipped out of his room, shutting the door behind him.
Two notes were left on the desk.
One was addressed to Gary, Tiggy, Kevin, Justin, the King, Mom, Dad, Pete, and anyone else who might read this.
It said:
I have to do what is right. What has been asked of me. I cannot stop him. Not now. Not as I am. Sometimes, you have to face your destiny head-on. And that’s what I am going to do.
I love you all.
Stay safe.
I’ll come back as soon as I can.
The second letter was addressed to Ryan Foxheart.
Ryan—
You will wake up. I know you will. There’s no other choice. And when you do, I’m not going to be there. I’m sorry for that. You’re going to be mad. I don’t blame you. I’d be pissed at you if you were doing this to me.
But I think, maybe, after the anger had faded just a little, I’d understand.
I’m hoping you can do that for me.
I don’t want to leave you.
But I think this is bigger than just you or me.
It’s my destiny.
And I still hate that word so, so much.
Because it’s not fair.
I never wanted this.
I never asked for this.
But it was given to me, regardless.
Morgan’s gone.
Randall is missing.
And if I’m going to have the strength I need to stop Myrin, then I need the Great White.
And in order to get him on our side, I need to do what he’s asking of me.
A year, Ryan. At the most.
Hold on, okay?
Just hold on.
Because one day, and one day soon, I am going to come back for you.
And I will never let you go.
I love you.
The world’s biggest Foxy Lady—
Sam
I HAD been in the Dark Woods for three days before I was joined by the fairies. They came from the trees and followed me closely for a time before their king came forward.
“Here you are,” Dimitri said.
“Here I am,” I agreed quietly as I stepped over a fallen log. I thought I was heading in the right direction, even if this part of the forest looked unfamiliar.
“Are you sure about this, Sam?”
“Yes.”
“Then we shall guide you and stay with you until the end.”
“I—thanks, Dimitri.”
He shrugged. “You are not the only one grieving, apprentice. The forest weeps with you. Morgan was….”
“Yeah,” I said. “He was.”
We continued on.
AS NIGHT fell on the fifth day, a great and terrible storm came.
Lightning flashed.
Thunder rolled.
Rain poured down from the sky.
And still I pushed on.
“We’re close,” Dimitri whispered as we entered a clearing, the fairies in front of us lighting the way. “We’re—”