“Has Paul ever threatened you?”
Her eyes lower. “Yes. A long time ago. Right after he went to prison, he sent me threatening letters.”
Pure undiluted rage burns through me. That fucker goes anywhere near India and Jett and I will kill him myself.
“I’m getting security for you and Jett for when I’m not here.” I hate that I have to leave soon, knowing that bastard is out there free to do as he pleases.
“What? No, it’s not necessary.” She shakes her head. “I don’t think he’ll bother us. I haven’t heard from him since the letters. And he’s been trying for parole for a long time, and now that he’s out, I’m sure he won’t want to jeopardize it.”
“Has Paul ever asked to see Jett?”
“No. I think he attributes Jett to him going to prison. I’m pretty sure he thinks if I had never got pregnant, then he would never have been found out.”
Anger and frustration and worry for her and Jett are pulsing through my veins.
“Please, just let me put some security guys on you to keep you safe.”
“It’s not necessary, Leandro.” She presses her hand to my cheek. “I’ll be fine. But okay, for Jett, yes, that would be a good idea. Just to be safe.”
“I fucking hate that I have to go to Belgium.” I sigh. “I really don’t want to leave you. Why don’t you and Jett come with me?”
“We can’t. I have to get back to work. I have patients depending on me. I’ve already taken time off. I can’t take any more.” She blows out a breath, looking a little lost.
“I won’t go to Belgium, then.”
She looks at me, aghast, dropping her hand from my face. “No,” she states emphatically. “You have to go. You’re contracted, and this is important to you. It’s your first season back since the accident.”
I cup her face in my hands. “You are more important to me.”
“I’ll be fine.” Leaning close, she presses a kiss to my forehead. “Kit’s here.” Then, a kiss to the tip of my nose. “Please, don’t worry.”
I hate feeling trapped and conflicted. I really don’t want to leave her while that fucking bastard is out on the streets, but I am contractually obligated to go to Belgium. I just wish she would come with me.
I start to speak, but she cuts me off with her lips, kissing me passionately.
I know her game, but I’m helpless to the feel of her delicate tongue in my mouth, her tight body against mine.
“This isn’t over,” I murmur under her lips, my hands reaching for her ass.
“I don’t doubt it,” she whispers. Then, she deepens the kiss, grinding herself against my erection.
I can work on her later, talk her into coming with me.
Because there is no way I feel comfortable with leaving her here without me.
And if she won’t come, then I will, without a doubt, have security detail assigned to her and Jett, until I can get back to them. Then, I will figure out what the fuck I am going to do for the rest of the races because I’m sure as hell not leaving her for extended periods of time while her jailbird of an ex is on the loose.
“HE’S DRIVING ME NUTS!” I hiss down the phone at Leandro. “He’s everywhere I go. I can’t even pee in peace without him standing outside the door. I feel like I’m back to the days when Jett was a toddler, and he used to follow me everywhere—bathroom included!”
Leandro laughs that deep rich laugh of his.
“It’s not funny!” I bite.
“I know, babe, but Andre is only doing his job.”
“A job that I don’t want him to be doing. I told you that getting a security guy for Jett was a great idea, but I don’t need one.” I point a finger at myself as if he could see me. “And I have patients coming in while he’s sitting out in the waiting room, and he’s scaring the life out of them. He’s bad for my business. I work on privacy here, Leandro.”
“Okay, I’ll tell him to sit outside your building in his car. Would that be better?”
“Much. Thank you. I do appreciate you looking out for me,” I add so not to sound like an ungrateful bitch, even though I didn’t want the security for myself. “It’s just weird, having him shadowing me.”
“I just want you to be safe, India. You and Jett both.”
Jett doesn’t know that Paul is out of prison. I thought long and hard whether to tell him or not, and both Leandro and Kit agreed with me that the best thing would be to keep it from Jett for now. I don’t want to disrupt his life unnecessarily at the moment. He thinks we have the security because of Leandro’s fame. Honestly, he loves having a bodyguard. I think he thinks he’s a celebrity now.
“We’re fine. It’s been over a week since Paul got out of prison, and he’s made no attempt to contact me.”
“Well, I am not taking any chances, so Andre and his team stay put until I get back.”
“How’s it going there?” I ask, changing the subject.
“Good. The car is performing well, so it’s just going to be down to me.”
“You’ll do amazing like you always do, and we’ll be watching all weekend, cheering you on.”
“I really wish you were here.” His voice lowers. “I miss you so fucking much. I hate being away from you.”
“Me, too.”
“When I get back, we’re spending a full day in bed.”
I feel a tingling between my thighs. I went years with minimal amounts of sex, but since being with Leandro, I’ve gotten used to having it every day, multiple times, and now, my body is struggling to go without him. “Sounds awesome.”
“It will be. I’m going to strip you naked, and kiss and lick every inch of your hot body. Lavish my full attention on every single part of you. Then, when I’m done worshipping you, I’m going to sit you on my face and have you come all over my tongue. And when I’m done licking up all your juices, I’m going to fuck your mouth with my cock, then, I’m going to fuck your gorgeous tits, right before bending you over and taking you from behind while I fuck your ass with my fingers.”
“Jesus, Leandro.” I shudder.
“Are you wet for me, India?” His voice has gone dark and sultry.
“Yes,” I breathe.
“I’m hard, babe. So fucking hard. Touch yourself for me.”
I’m just reaching my hand down when the buzzer in my office goes off, telling me I have a patient.
I let out a groan. “Shit. I have a patient. Can we put this on ice until later?”
“Sure. But I might have to go jack off in my room before I go back to the garage. Otherwise, I’m going to be sporting a boner all day.”
“Sorry.” I giggle.
“You will be when I see you next,” he growls.
“I love you.”
“Love you, too.”
“Speak to you tonight?”
“I’ll call you when I’m done at the track.”
Reluctantly, I hang up and dial through to Sophie to let her know to let my next patient in.
My working day is done. I lock up my office and head down to the car where Andre is waiting to drive me home.
As I exit the building, I have the strangest sensation ripple down my spine.
Like I’m being watched.
I’ve been feeling it these past few days, but I’m putting it down to anxiety. The fact that Paul hasn’t made any form of contact has actually left me unnerved and a tad paranoid.
As I approach the car, Andre already has the door open and waiting for me.
“Thank you.” I smile at him.
For all that his presence annoys me in a way, he is a really nice man.
He rounds the car and gets in, shifting the car with his large frame.
“Good day?” he asks as he starts the engine.
“Long. I’m ready to get home and relax.”
“Jonah will be taking over from me in half an hour, so you’ll see his car sitting outside,” Andre tells me as he walks me to my door. “Usual protocol. Anything suspicious, press the panic alarm.”
“I’ll be fine,” I assure him.
The security guys rotate on shift. Leandro wanted Jett and me to have twenty-four-hour security.
I unlock my door, and I’m surprised when the alarm beeps at me. “That’s strange. The alarm is on.”
“Did Jett not tell you that Kit took him to the karting track? Simon is with them. He’ll drop them off when they’re done, and Jonas will cover you both until morning when I take back over with you, and Simon with Jett.”
“No, he didn’t tell me.”
Clearly, my security guy knows more about my son’s movements than I do.
“Thanks, Andre.”
I close the door and kick off my heels. As I wander into the kitchen to pour a glass of wine, I see a note tacked to the fridge from Jett and Kit.
GONE TO THE TRACK. WE’LL BRING PIZZA HOME.
LOVE, J & K
I pour myself a glass of wine, grab my phone, and go upstairs to take a bath.
The book lying in the center of my bed stops me in my tracks.
Red Dragon.
It was the book that Paul gave me. It was his favorite book. He had highlighted his favorite passages in it.
For some reason, I kept it for all these years. I guess maybe a part of me—the part that wanted to believe he wasn’t all bad, remember the times he’d been good to me—held on to that book. Now, it’s here, lying on my bed.
I never kept it on the bookshelf in the living room as I didn’t want Jett to ever find and question it.
It was in the box in my wardrobe with all the newspaper articles from the trial.
My hand trembles as I put my wine down on my bedside table.
Why would this be here?
Did Jett maybe find it and begin reading it?
I go to my wardrobe and pull out the box it was in. Laying it on the bed, I open it. Aside from the book being out, everything else is still there, as I left it.
I stare at the book.
Could this have been…
No. I would have known if Paul were here in London. His tag would have alerted the police to him leaving Manchester. Russell would have called me.
It can’t be him.
It must have been Jett or maybe Kit. Maybe Kit was looking for something and just left it there by mistake.
But, Kit doesn’t know I kept Paul’s book.
I pick up my wine and take a fortifying sip, then, put it back down.
Using my phone, I dial Kit’s number.
“Hey,” he greets me.
“Hey. How’s karting?”
“Good. Jett’s kicking ass out there at the moment. Did you get our note?”
“I did.”
“We won’t be much longer, and then we’ll be heading home. What do you want on your pizza?”
“The usual, chicken and ham…Kit, were you in my room earlier?”
“No. Why?”
“It’s nothing. There was just a book on my bed, and I’m fairly certain I didn’t leave it there.”
“Maybe it was Jett?”
“Yeah…maybe.”
“Indy…are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a long day, is all.”
“Okay, well, we’ll be home soon.”
I hang up with Kit and stare at the book still sitting there, mocking me.
Reaching over, I pick it up. My hand is trembling again.
I look down at it, tracing my finger over the cover. Then, I drop it back in the box and put the lid on. Getting to my feet, I put the box back in my wardrobe, and close the door on it, and my past.
“I’M CONSIDERING RETIRING NEXT YEAR. Making this my last season.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Carrick shakes his head as he sits forward in his seat. “I’m not sure I heard you correctly. Did you just say you’re considering retiring?”
“I am more than considering. And please keep your voice down. Ears.” I gesture at the people around us.
We’re in the hotel bar. Carrick is bored because Andi has gone for a night out with Petra, so I’m his date for the night. I would really rather not be here. A couple of women are at the bar, and one of them has been eye-fucking me since I arrived ten minutes ago. Brunette with big tits. The type of woman I would have fucked without a second thought—before India.
Now, I have no interest in other women. I only see India.
“You’re the first person I am talking to about this, so keep it to yourself—meaning tell no one, including Andi— because nothing is definite yet.”
“You haven’t talked to India about this?”
“No.” I shake my head.
“Well, while I’m honored I’m the first you’re telling, can I ask, why the fuck are you considering it?”
“Because…” I shrug.
“Oh, well, that explains it.” He throws a hand up, letting it fall back to his lap. “You just got your career back, and now, you’re considering throwing it away.”
“I’m not throwing it away.” I frown at him. “I am thirty-one years old. This is the last year on my contract. Sure, it’s up for renewal, but I am not sure I want that. I have been behind the wheel of a car since I can remember. I nearly lost my life for the fucking love of it. But things are different now. I’m different. I thought coming back would be everything, but it’s not. Of course, I still love racing. Just not in the same way. And now I have found something I love more.”
“India?”
“Mmhmm.”
“But India’s not asking you to quit, is she?” He raises a brow in question.
“No, she’s not. She would never do that. But come on, Carrick, you know what this life is like. We’re on the road nine months out of the year. I will hardly see her. I hardly see her as it is. And it’s not like it is with you and Andi. She travels with you. India can’t do that.”
“So, hire India to work for you. You’re clearly having another mental break, and you could do with a staged intervention from a professional.”
I give him the middle finger. “Look, even if I did make up some imaginary job and somehow got India to give her career up to come and work for me—which I would never do because I’m not that much of a selfish bastard—she has Jett. He has school. She needs to be in London, and I need to be there with her.”
Carrick slumps back in his chair and takes a sip of his beer. “You’re really serious then?”
“Yes, I’m really serious.” I start to pick at the label on my bottle.
“Just…don’t make any rash decisions. Talk to India first, see what she thinks.”
“I’ll discuss it with her when I get back home.”
“Good. God, it’ll be weird without you around. It was strange last year when you weren’t on the track, bugging the fuck out of me, getting in my way.”
“Love you, too, Ryan.” I smirk at him.
“Yeah, well, don’t expect me to give you a pity win for this championship, so you can go out on a high.”
“Ha! Like you need to. I’m kicking your ass, and you know it.”
“Fuck you, Silva. I’m gonna kick your arse on Sunday. My car’s performing like a dream. And I have the best mechanic on my side.”
“Yes, you do.” I have to agree with that. Andi is one of the best mechanics around. There was a time, just before my accident, when I was considering how to poach her from him.
“Don’t worry though. If you do retire, I’ll make sure you’re remembered for being a great driver. Second to me of course.”
Laughing at him, I take a sip of my beer.
“So, what will you do, if you do decide to go?” Carrick asks with genuine curiosity.
“I don’t know.” I rest my bottle on my thigh. “I’ll have to do something though, or I will go out of my mind with boredom while India is at work.”
“You could always take up drinking and whoring around like you did last year.”
“You’re a prick.”
“I know.” He smirks. “But, in all seriousness, you know my dad gave his job up
when I was younger, so he could be there full-time for my career.”
“And what does that have to do with me retiring?”
“Well, Jett is showing a real interest in karting, and the kid’s really good. He’s got real natural talent. You could help him hone it, get him racing, entering competitions, building his reputation. That’d keep your retired arse busy. I know my racing kept my dad busy. Still does. And at least you’d still be a part of the racing circuit, so I’d get to see your ugly face around.”
“I suppose I could. But it would depend on that being what Jett wants.”
“A racing-obsessed kid getting the chance for Leandro Silva to coach him. Yeah, I’m sure he’d turn it down.” He chuckles.
I’m pondering Carrick’s suggestion when a throat clears beside me. I turn my head, and my eyes meet with a huge pair of tits. I mean, they’re literally in my face.
I tilt my head back to find the chick who’s been eye-fucking me from the bar now standing over me.
“You’re Leandro Silva, right?”
She sounds English. She must be here for the race. She clearly knows who I am. Surprised she hasn’t clocked Carrick though.
“I am.” I give her a congenial smile so not to come off as a bastard. I still have a public profile to keep up.
“Could I have my picture taken with you?”
“Sure.” I hold back the sigh I feel. The last thing I want is to have my picture taken with a chick who is probably aiming to get in my pants.
“Bev!” she calls to her friend at the bar. “Come take the pic for me.”
Her friend comes wobbling over on her high heels, clearly well on her way to being drunk. She gives me the eye as she takes the camera from Big Boobs next to me.
Big Boobs puts her arm around my waist, sliding in close to me. “My name’s Andrea,” she says, trying to sound sexy.
All it does is make me cringe. “Nice to meet you, Andrea.” I give her a friendly smile. “Are you a racing fan?”
“No, my boyfriend is. He’s a big fan. His company got him tickets for the race, so he and his best mate are watching. They brought me and Bev along with them for the weekend.”
“Sounds nice.” I look ahead, ready to have my picture taken so I can get back to my beer.