“The less said about it the better,” Reddix said shortly. “I have it, I deal with it. Just don’t make my hair too short.”
“Okay,” she said quietly. She went on snipping, glad to find that her hands still remembered their old skill, but inside she was hurting for him. Up until now she’d had the impression he couldn’t feel anything from other people unless they were touching him—well, other than the aliens they found themselves currently with, but they used emotions to communicate.
Nina had never dreamed the RTS was so bad—so debilitating. No wonder Reddix was gruff and harsh sometimes. He’d probably been in severe pain for the past ten years, ever since his disease manifested itself. She couldn’t imagine having to feel every emotion everyone felt about her or around her all the time. It would be horrible…unbearable.
Stop getting distracted and do your job, she warned herself as she snipped. Concentrate on doing it right. Make sure you don’t take too much off.
Nina took a deep breath, trying to clear her mind. She had been young when her mother taught her, but she had learned well. She had continued giving her father and friends haircuts even after her mother had died and the little beauty shop on Flora Avenue closed. Soon she was able to lose herself in her work and push the troubling thoughts aside.
Reddix’s hair was thick with a slight wave to it, but it wasn’t hard to cut. It seemed to fall naturally into a pattern, and she found herself following it, marveling all over again as she did at the deep blue—almost black color of it. His beard, she noted, was almost completely black, darker even than the hair on his head.
At last, she stood back and admired her work. His hair was still a bit long, but it was much less shaggy. Really, except for the beard he looked almost presentable.
“Finished?” Reddix asked.
“With your hair anyway. Now it’s time for a shave.” Nina took the towel off his shoulders and shook it into the fireplace, getting rid of the clippings. Then she put it back on him and picked up the clippers. “I think we’d better use these to start with and finish up with the razor. That’s a pretty thick beard.”
“I can do it myself if you want me to,” he offered, sitting up a little straighter.
Nina shook her head. “I don’t mind. And besides, there aren’t any mirrors here for you to look at.”
“All right.” He relaxed in the chair again. “I’m in your hands.”
“I’ll do my best. You already look less like a bear.” She smiled at him.
“But I thought you liked bears. You said they were your…your spirit creature?” He raised his eyebrows at her in question.
“Spirit animal,” Nina corrected him as she began to buzz his cheeks and chin. The Kindred clippers were amazingly fast and quiet. “But that’s just magic and superstition, really.”
“There’s more to magic and superstition than you think,” he murmured. “Maybe the bear thing is the reason you can…can touch me.” His deep voice was slightly hoarse.
“Maybe,” Nina said softly. She put down the clippers and picked up the razor. “You’d better stop talking now. This thing is sharp.”
He made a deep noise of assent and closed his eyes as she began to shave him more closely. Nina was fast and careful, but as she began to clear the black stubble from his cheeks, she saw something that startled her. Reddix had scars. Two long, white, deliberate lines ran parallel along the left side of his strong jaw. It looked like someone had cut him there on purpose—as though he’d gotten into a knife fight with a sadist who knew exactly what he was doing and had wanted to disfigure the big Kindred in some way.
“Hey,” she said softly, running one fingertip along the cruel white scars. “What happened here?”
“Nothing.” Reddix jerked away from her touch and sat up quickly.
“Who did that to you?” Nina asked. “Why would anyone—”
“I told you, it’s nothing,” he growled. “Here, give me the razor. I’ll finish myself.”
“No.” Nina stepped back, holding her hands up in a gesture of peace though foam from the razor dripped down her wrist. “Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“Not offended,” he said tightly, but the closed, guarded look was back in his eyes.
“Just let me finish,” she said quietly. “I promise I won’t ask any more questions.”
“Fine.” He settled into the chair again, but there was a tension in his broad shoulders that hadn’t been there before. Nina’s heart squeezed in her chest. She wished he wasn’t so secretive. That she could find a way to make him open up.
The only thing you need to find is a way home, eecho, whispered Mehoo-Jimmy’s voice in her mind. Nina knew it was true, but she couldn’t help wanting to get behind the wall Reddix had built around himself. She had a feeling if she could just breach that barrier, she could help him…heal him.
But first he would have to let her in.
Chapter Eighteen
“Still no sign of the emergency beacon?” Liv asked.
“Afraid not.” Kat sighed and settled herself on the couch beside Sophia. They were in her suite today because she had all the wedding planning materials there. Not that she felt like planning much of anything right now. “They’re not sure where the ship Reddix stole landed,” she said.
“Baird went to check it out, and he says the wormhole they went through is really unstable,” Liv said.
“What does that mean?” Sophia asked, eyes wide.
“Well…that they might not have landed at all,” Kat said quietly.
“Oh, no.” Sophia looked like she might cry. “But Kat, I was there when Sylvan talked to her grandma—that little old lady—that Mehaw…”
“Mehoo-Jimmy,” Kat interrupted. “I know. I heard all about it.”
“She was so upset, and I don’t blame her,” Liv said grimly. “What’s wrong with Reddix, kidnapping that girl? Everybody knows that’s not how you claim a bride.”
“Well, Lissa says Saber isn’t entirely sure claiming her was his intention,” Kat said.
“What else could he want her for?” Sophia asked and winced as she put a hand on her rounded belly. “Oh! The twins are kicking.”
“Mine aren’t yet, but I’m sure they will be soon,” Kat said. “I just hope they don’t start when I’m walking down the aisle with Deep and Lock.”
“At least not so your grandma can see,” Liv murmured, a ghost of a smile on her face.
“Exactly. I’m already getting fatter. This wedding needs to happen soon.” Kat sighed.
“It will,” Sophia promised. “The planning is going great, isn’t it?”
“It was until this whole mess with Reddix kidnapping that poor girl,” Kat said grimly. “Lissa was helping me a lot, but now I haven’t seen her in days. Every time I call her or try to go see her she says she has a headache and needs to be left alone.” She shook her head. “It’s not just about the wedding—I’m getting really worried about her.”
“I know you two are close, but maybe she just needs a little space,” Liv said consolingly. “And Sophie and I will pick up the slack as much as we can.”
“No, I don’t want you guys to have to worry about it,” Kat demurred. “You’ve got a new baby, and Sophie’s about ready to pop. Lauren is already making the cake, Nadiah is stuck on First World, and Elise is off with Merrick exploring the universe, although she did promise to come back for the big event—if it ever happens.”
“It’ll happen,” Sophia said soothingly. “Honestly it will. And as long as your grandmother still has no idea that Kindred babies are carried for a whole year instead of nine months, there’s no reason she has to know you’re preggy on the big day.”
“Sophie’s right,” Liv said. “You can say you got pregnant on your honeymoon.”
“I hope you’re right,” Kat said. “Grandma will be scandalized otherwise. It’s bad enough me marrying two guys at once, but walking down the aisle knocked up…that might be the last straw.” She sighed.
“Speaking of babies, where’s your adorable little guy today, Liv?”
“Off with his daddy. Apparently it’s 'bring your baby to work and show him off while bragging unmercifully to the other warriors that you have the best son in the known universe day'.” Liv grinned.
“Seriously? Baird just decided to take him today?” Kat asked. “But he’s still so little.”
“Yeah, but he already loves his daddy, and Baird is really good with the little guy,” Liv said. “You know, from what I’ve seen all Kindred are pretty good dads, but I think the whole, um experience, Baird had during the last part of my pregnancy really forged a bond between the two of them.”
Kat raised an eyebrow. “You mean the experience where he was actually pregnant and had to give birth to his own son?”
“Yeah, that experience.” Liv laughed. “Seriously, though, Baird seems to feel extra close to Daniel because of it.” She popped a grape into her mouth from the fresh fruit and veggie tray which was sitting neglected on Kat’s coffee table. “I highly recommend it for all pregnancies.”
Sophia sighed. “If only. I’m getting so tired of being pregnant, and I’m not even into my last quadmester yet.”
“Hush.” Kat frowned at her. “Some of us are still in the first quadmester. I don’t want to hear anything except how wonderful it is.”
“At least you’re going to have two dads to help out when your boys get here,” Sophie pointed out. “Sylvan and I are having twins, and we don’t have a third parent to help us.”
“At least you won’t be outnumbered,” Liv said comfortingly. She turned to Kat. “And I’m sure Deep and Lock will make great dads.”
“Probably Lock more than Deep,” Kat said, grinning. “I think he’s got more maternal instinct than me. I’m all focused on the wedding, but he’s already decorating the nursery.”
“What about Deep?” Sophie asked.
“He’s building the crib. It’s going to be a double-wide, of course.” Kat’s face fell. “Only…”
“What? What’s wrong, hon?” Liv leaned forward. “Why do you look so sad all of a sudden?”
“Just thinking about being pregnant,” Kat said. “It’s not that I don’t want to be—I’m good with it now although I wasn’t for a while. It’s just…I can’t help Deep and Lock do the seeker-finder thing while I’m preggy.”
“Is it not safe for the babies?” Sophia asked.
Kat shook her head. “Not so much that as that their tiny little minds get in the way. It’s like being pregnant makes everything blurry—it throws off the accuracy. But I wish so much that I could still do it.”
“To find that girl Reddix kidnapped, right?” Liv said quietly. “You want to go looking for her the same way you went looking for Lauren when she was gone with Xairn.”
Kat nodded. “Exactly. Deep and Lock have tried using Saber as a focus, but his Touch Sense keeps him from being effective, and they’re so used to working with me now, they couldn’t find anything.”
“You can’t blame yourself for that,” Sophia said.
“I don’t. I just wish I could help some way.” Kat sighed. “Maybe it would make Lissa feel better if she knew that girl Reddix took is alive and all right.”
“Does anyone know where he was taking her?” Liv asked. “Or why?”
Kat shrugged. “Lissa said Saber thinks he might take her back to Tarsia—their home planet. But so far they haven’t showed up there. Apparently Reddix had some kind of a weird idea about needing her for a cure for his condition—that Reverted Touch thingy, whatever it is.”
Liv frowned. “Reverted what?”
“It’s Reverse Touch Syndrome, and it only affects Touch Kindred males with the Star Clan blood,” a new voice said from the doorway.
Kat, Liv, and Sophie looked up in surprise. Lissa was standing just inside the doorway, a drawn look on her face.
“Forgive me for entering without asking,” she said quietly. “But I wanted to come and say goodbye to all of you before I go.”
“Before you go?” Kat asked, getting up and going to her. “Before you go where?”
“Back to Tarsia.” Lissa’s face was pale but determined. “To face the consequences of my actions.”
“What actions?” Liv asked as Kat led Lissa to sit on the extra-long couch that came standard in all Twin Kindred suites.
“She means falling for Saber,” Kat said quietly. “Don’t you, doll?”
Lissa nodded. “Saber and I were never supposed to fall in love in the first place, much less act on that love,” she said. “But since we have made the decision to be together, we must go back home and announce it to all of Tarsia.”
“Um, correct me if I’m wrong, but won’t that be like going home and telling everyone you married your big brother?” Liv asked, frowning.
Lissa nodded again. “That is exactly what it will mean. Even though there are no blood ties between us, we will still be reviled as incestuous and disgusting.”
“But…why put yourself through that? Why go home at all?” Sophia asked.
“We have to. It’s our fault Reddix was desperate enough to abduct that innocent girl and get both himself and her killed in the process,” Lissa said softly.
“What? They’re sure they got killed now?” Kat exclaimed.
“No, but what else could have happened?” Lissa said. “They haven’t shown up anywhere on Tarsia, and they haven’t set off their emergency beacon. Saber has been waiting, hoping against hope it would go off. We don’t…” She choked for a minute, then forced herself to go on. “We didn’t want to have to go back home and announce that Reddix was dead and ask for an acknowledgement of our relationship at the same time. It’s just…too much bad news all at once.”
“That would be hard to break to everyone,” Liv said sympathetically. “But maybe it will force your people to accept you and Saber as their rulers.”
“Or it will force them into a bloody civil war,” Lissa said and wiped at her eyes. “This…it’s going to be horrible. I know it’s selfish to care about myself when Reddix and the girl he took are probably dead, but to go back to my home planet and stand up in front of everyone to admit that I seduced their rightful leader away from his post…”
“You can’t look at it like that,” Kat said firmly. “The people back on Tarsia—they’re the ones with outdated, old-fashioned ideas. They’re the one with the problem, not you and Saber.”
“Kat’s right,” Sophia said indignantly. “Don’t let them push you around or make you feel bad for loving your own husband! Listen, none of Sylvan’s relatives like me—well, except for Nadiah—but I don’t let it bother me a bit.”
“It’s not just her relatives though—it’s the whole freaking planet,” Liv pointed out. She reached across Kat and pressed Lissa’s hand. “I can see why it’s so hard, hon. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s all right.” Lissa sniffed and tried to smile. “I’ll be all right. I just need to get over feeling sorry for myself and get ready to go.”
“When are you leaving?” Kat asked quietly.
“Tonight. Or maybe tomorrow some time,” Lissa said. “We might wait one more night and hope that the beacon goes off. Saber has everyone in the scanning section of the Mother Ship on the alert for it.”
“Give yourself the night,” Kat advised. “And spend it with Saber. Take some time to remember how much you love each other and promise to stay strong before you go.”
“Reaffirm your relationship,” Liv said, nodding. “You guys are going into a really tough situation. Give yourself some time to prepare for it.”
Lissa sighed. “I feel like all we’ve been doing is preparing. We’ve been talking about this—going back—since the first night Reddix showed up in our suite.”
“And how does Saber feel about it?” Sophia asked.
“He knows it’s the right thing to do.” Lissa looked down at her hands. “I just wish it wasn’t such a hard thing to do.”
“Oh, hon…” Kat gav
e her friend a big hug. “I don’t know how, but I know everything is going to be okay. You and Saber were made for each other and don’t you let anyone tell you different.”
Lissa hugged her back. “Thank you, Kat. I’m just sorry I’m leaving you in the middle of the preparations for your joining ceremony. I promise I’ll try to come back for it.”
“Don’t worry about a thing,” Liv told her. “Sophie and I will pick up the slack. Just do what you have to do and come back if you can.”
“If I can,” Lissa echoed and swiped at her eyes again. “Thank you. Thank you all, so much.”
“Any time, doll.” Kat smiled at her. “Now come on and help us choke down some of this fruit.” She nodded down at the overflowing platter on her coffee table. “I’ve been trying to eat healthier because I’m pregnant, but nobody seems to be interested in helping me.”
“It has been a long time since I’ve eaten,” Lissa admitted, giving her friend a wan smile. “And I love exotic fruit—what’s this green stick?” she asked, pointing.
“Ugh—that’s celery.” Kat shivered. “Can’t recommend it myself. Tastes like crunchy cardboard, and the strings get in your teeth.”
“Well…what about this one?” Lissa pointed at an orange stick this time.
“Carrot,” Kat said blandly. “It’s good—if you’re a bunny rabbit.”
“Don’t listen to Kat,” Liv said. “Try some of the fruit—it’s on this side of the plate.” She pointed.
“All right. This one looks good,” Lissa decided, picking up a yellow piece.
“That’s pineapple,” Sophia said. “Try it—it’s delicious.”
“Tastes better upside down in a cake,” Kat grumbled.
“Upside down? Lissa frowned and turned the small yellow chunk over. “Am I holding it wrong? Will it make me sick if I eat it the wrong way?”
Liv laughed. “No, no—Kat just has an awful sweet tooth now that she’s got a bun in the oven. There’s a dessert we make with this fruit, but it’s much more fattening than the fruit itself.”