“I guess that’s why you’re so attractive to me.”
For a stretch, neither of them spoke. Keith turned and slowed down when necessary. The music remained muted, lightly bumping against the speakers, whispering through the air. She and Todd used to drive around like this, but with no destination in sight, just moments passing by. Looking back, she wondered how many of those moments she’d ruined by telling him to slow down or watch a car changing lanes or insisting they find something to do. She didn’t know how to relax back then; she wasn’t sure she even knew how to now.
“Something’s on your mind, I take it?” Keith asked.
“Tell me something, Keith. Tell me about your ex. When did you know that the marriage was beyond redemption?”
He sucked in a deep breath. “Where did that come from?”
“Just humor me, okay?”
“Sure.” He stayed silent, his jaw pinched tightly closed. His eyes were on the road, but they’d narrowed and a frown wrinkled his otherwise smooth features. “The hell of it, Anna, was that I didn’t know. I never knew anything was wrong until she was ready to leave.”
“Come on, really? You didn’t have the faintest clue?”
“What about you? When did you think your marriage was unredeemable?”
She gasped. “I never said it was.”
“Then what the hell are we doing? Why would you do this if you thought there was something left to save?”
Each word of his question pierced her like a series of darts. How do you respond to that? He’d basically just called her out on her bullshit. Bullshit that she’d done her best to ignore for the extent of their nearly yearlong affair. Occasionally it had come bubbling to the surface, but she felt like overall she’d done a good job of repressing her misgivings. Today though, her confrontation with Katie and now Keith’s pointed questions had dragged everything out into the open. It was all she could do to not cry.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “We’re just having fun, right?”
She dug her nails into the palms of her hands. “Do you love me?”
Now it was his turn to be caught off guard. He looked like she’d slapped him. She watched intently, waiting for him to answer. His mouth moved, but no words came, it looked like he was chewing on what he would say, getting an impression of how it would taste.
He looked at her, his eyes expressive, and she knew how he’d answer before he got the words out. When he affirmed what she already knew, she looked away from him, back at the black, empty road. She took almost a full minute to digest what he had said.
“Stop the car.”
“What? Why?”
She thought about the implications of his confession and the possibility that maybe she loved him too. She must love him if she’d spent the last year risking her marriage and her family. The whole thing was goddamned crazy. Now, no matter what path she took, someone would get hurt. Maybe the best thing to do was go home and think about it, really think about it.
She remembered the night Todd came to her door near the end of that summer where he’d drifted away into the affections of some girl named Chloe. She listened from the top of the stairs as her father greeted him as if no time had passed at all, asked about Todd’s father, and offered a drink. Todd took a seat on the couch and she waited for him to get settled before she came down to see him.
When he embraced her that night, he said he was glad to see her. She remembered feeling he meant it. Something in his features betrayed a willing vulnerability, that he was open to trying.
After having a drink with her father, they drove off to a movie. Poltergeist. She’d been tense the whole time, like she was now, until finally she asked him where he’d been.
“Really,” she'd said.
When he had hesitated, she asked him if there’d been someone else even though she had known there had been, because their fathers had been close and her father had always relayed what he had felt was relevant information.
Todd had lit a cigarette, delaying his response even more. Finally, “There was, but it’s over now. I didn’t do it to hurt you.”
“Who was she?”
“Does it matter?”
She had taken one of his cigarettes and lit it. “No, I guess not.”
“I mean it though. It’s over.”
“What about us? What do you really want out of this?”
He had seemed to think hard about this. Expecting a plethora of answers or maybe even one cosmos-shifting one, she had tried to stay open to whatever he would say.
“To be loved, I guess. To be important.”
She had put her hand on his. “I can love you.”
He looked from her hand to her face. A sense of security had settled over the atmosphere and she felt the tension loosening its grip.
After that night, things had happened quickly. In a month’s time, he had proposed, and they'd been married that spring. By the next summer, she was pregnant with Dale.
Todd had loved her. Maybe he still did. She took Keith’s hand and squeezed, more of a consoling gesture than one of romantic affection.
“Just, please, Keith. I need you to take me home.”
He took a deep breath. “Sure.”
~Katie~
Katie studied the remaining pink sunlight that shined through the canopy of trees above. A cloud of marijuana smoke billowed up beside her and Jake handed off the joint, which she took gratefully. She held the sweet smoke in her mouth, closed her eyes, and savored it. Jake always got good stuff. She coughed it out and opened her eyes to watch it ascend.
Her body tingled and a wave of relaxation settled over her. It was nice to be away from home. More so, it was nice to be with Jake. They'd met two semesters ago at some party her classmates had talked her into attending. She had noticed that he'd looked like he wanted to be there even less than she did, so she struck up a conversation. They liked the same music and he had a sense of humor so they became fast friends. He was fun by nature and gentle when she needed him to be so they became eventual lovers. He drank a little too much, but he was a dreamer that always looked ahead to a better future, and he was a great listener.
“I fucking hate my family,” she said.
He took a hit from the joint, exhaled, and sipped from a bottle of beer. “Your mom acting out again?”
“It’s way worse.” She told him about the confrontation, the younger man she didn’t recognize in the parking lot of Marcus and Marcus, the kisses, how her mom and this man left together.
He coughed. “Holy shit, you followed her?”
“Jake…”
“I’m sorry. Just… wow.”
She wished they’d waited to smoke until after she told him everything. They were having too good a time and she didn’t want to ruin it, but then she reminded herself that the main reason she had invited him out was to talk. She just hoped he wasn’t too stoned.
“So yeah, I don’t know. It’s really upsetting, and it’s not just her. My dad acts like nothing’s happening. Like everything is right with the world. How can he not know something weird is going on?”
Jake propped himself up on his elbow and focused on her. He put out the joint on the hood of his car and flicked its ashen remains into the dirt road. She continued.
“Could be denial, I guess. I just hate seeing him so oblivious and her being so… so…”
He waited for her to finish the sentence.
“…so shameless.”
He nodded. “I can’t imagine what they’re going through. I swear people lose their minds at their age.”
He was speaking from experience. A week after turning fifty, Jake’s father had quit his job, divorced Jake’s mother, and left her everything but his Pontiac, which he used to drive down south to find a permanent new home. Jake hadn’t spoken to him in three years.
“I’m sure it’s not easy on you, but I’m sure the last thing your mom wants to do is hurt you, and your dad’s not a dumb guy. He’s probably playing dumb because he thinks
that will protect you or some shit.”
She reached down and took another beer from the cooler. “You’re probably right.”
“Whatever your mom’s going through is probably giving her tunnel vision. Maybe as shitty as this is, it’ll help you grow and stand on your own.”
“What? You don’t think I can stand on my own?”
He put up a defensive hand. “That’s not what I said. I think you’re perfectly capable. Separating yourself from your parents and their bullshit issues may be a good opportunity to show yourself just how capable you actually are.”
“You are so high,” she said with a laugh.
“So are you.” He kissed her.
She returned the kiss, but quickly pulled away. “I’m concerned for them though. I can’t just pretend nothing’s happening.”
Jake shrugged. “Maybe you should confront your mom.”
“You think so?”
He finished his beer and took another. “And your dad, too. Fuck it. Let them know how much their stupid drama is affecting you.”
She nodded, feeling empowered for a moment. “I wonder if I could really do it.”
“Sure you could.”
She returned her attention to the pink sunlight glowing between the leaves. The idea of calling her mom out was both terrifying and exciting.
“I think my dad needs a hug more than anything else. He always seems so lost, like he’s adrift somewhere far away and his body’s been left behind.”
“That’s it? He’s off the hook.”
“Well…”
“So you are mad at him, too, right?”
She thought for a moment, then nodded.
“Then I wouldn’t let him off easy, I mean, if you plan on confronting them at all. You can always just let it go.”
She looked away from the sky and down at her hands. “You know I can’t do that.”
“Then you know what you have to do.”
She nodded.
He took her chin in his hand. “Now how about we finish that kiss?”
~Chloe~
Chloe was too petrified to react as Samael stepped through the door frame, flashing his jagged teeth, his hands clenching and unclenching. Those teeth had bitten into her many times before. Those hands had ravaged her on more occasions than she could count.
“Welcome home,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
Hearing the malicious intent in his words, she snapped out of her trance and turned to run. He fell upon her, snaking an arm around her throat and forcing her face into the dirt. He squeezed and she felt her air supply closing off as his hot flesh pressed against hers. He laughed as he strangled her, so sure of himself.
A car door slammed and a voice cried out.
“Hey!”
Samael released her, pushing her back to the ground and getting to his feet. She raised her head and saw Todd standing outside his car in a fighting stance. She got to her knees.
“No, Todd, don’t…”
A slap to the side of the head from Samael silenced her.
As she fell, she heard herself repeating that last word:
Don’t.
Don’t.
Don’t.
~Todd~
Todd watched Chloe pitch to the ground. Samael came for him at a speed he didn't believe possible. He had no time to outmaneuver the attack. Samael reached for Todd’s hair and snatched a fistful of it. Suspended into the air, his scalp caught fire with excruciating pain. He sounded alien to himself as he screamed a shrill, childlike cry.
Everything that had happened, from Chloe’s reemergence to helping her get here, to their long history together, seemed so unimportant now. Only survival mattered. He kicked and struggled, but Samael didn’t let go.
Todd looked down into the demon’s face and saw eyes ablaze with angry fire. The skin on Samael’s other hand took on a ghostly pigment. Inside the translucent flesh, white worms writhed and twisted. Todd tried to pull free as the ethereal hand touched his chest.
Intense chills spread through his core.
“Well, I hope she’s been worth it,” Samael said.
Memories of his life with Chloe, long before she died, played through his mind and he knew Samael was sharing these memories. From touching him, this beast was able to explore Todd’s soul, his thoughts, and his deepest, darkest recollections. They shared a perverse sort of intimacy. Within seconds, Samael learned everything about Todd. Samael tore these memories from him with the greed of a man near starvation tearing into a package of food. It was as if Todd’s life flashed before his eyes, but each image was ripped away rather than peacefully transitioning from one memory to another.
“You’ve known her a long time,” Samael acknowledged. “You’ve loved her a long time, but this is fate, and you have no right to interfere.”
Samael threw him across the street and he crashed into the trunk of a car with a metallic thud awakening new pains in his body. The car’s spoiler dug into his ribcage, taking the wind out of him. His hands crossed his midsection as he fought to catch his breath before Samael approached.
Chloe’s subjugator moved slowly now, confident as the sky darkened above him. Todd tried to rise and almost fell forward, but Samael took him by the hair again. The pain in his scalp intensified as Samael lifted him off of his feet. He felt the roots of his hair tearing free, unable to support his weight. He braced for the end, but knew deep down that no expectation could prepare him. This monster intended to take Todd to Hell.
His heart slammed in his chest, protesting the cruelty of the moment, perhaps intending to force its way out and flee to a safer place. Todd expected his life to flash before his eyes once again, but all he knew was immediate terror and pain. Samael pulled back his ethereal fist, undoubtedly intending to punch right through Todd's heart.
The release came. He flew away from Samael in an instant. He felt no pain. He fell forever.
That’s okay, he thought. How long did you think you could keep this up anyway?
* * *
Todd awoke to a sting on his cheek. A dark-haired angel hovered over him in the night sky, her face haloed by silver light. She was saying something, but he couldn’t hear her. He wondered if Chloe had been wrong about the hereafter, if he was now in Heaven.
He spoke her name and his lucidity returned. There wasn’t an angel hovering over him. It was her, and she was yelling at him to get up. He recalled the pain in his cheek. Had she slapped him?
“Come on, Todd. We have to go.”
He shook the last of the haziness from his head and let her help him into a sitting position. She looked off to the left and he followed her gaze. Samael lay in a bloody heap. Les’s car was nearby, the hood baring a large dent and splotches of blood.
Chloe took his hands in both of hers. “We have to go.”
There was commotion behind him, a few frantic voices and some doors opening. He looked back at Samael and saw the man starting to stir.
“No fucking way.”
“Let’s go!” Chloe pulled him up. “Now!”
Todd limped his way to the car, his muscles and bones aching in countless places, and wondered how much more abuse his body could take. Chloe rounded the vehicle ahead of him and slid into the driver’s seat. Someone hollered for them to stop.
“I’ll drive. Come on.”
Instead of arguing, Todd let himself into the passenger side and crumpled into the seat. Chloe put the car in drive. The tires squealed as she floored the accelerator and he jerked back against the seat.
“Buckle up,” she said.
“Can you give a dead girl a ticket?” The ridiculousness of his words made him realize how disoriented he was.
“No, but I can put you through the windshield. Buckle up!”
He obeyed and looked ahead. “Fuck.”
Samael stood in front of them, shaking the pain out of his limbs. Chloe kept the gas pedal pressed down. Samael raised his head and gritted his teeth. He bent his knees, prepared to j
ump.
Chloe hit him head on and he tumbled over the top of the car. Samael’s naked flesh struck the pavement behind them with a wet slap. Chloe swerved out into the next street. Brakes squealed and a horn honked. Todd rubbed his aching head and stared at the blood trickling down the windshield. The madness of the moment came at him from all sides. The car’s engine roared angrily as Chloe accelerated.
“God… Holy fucking shit!”
Chloe made another turn and then another. Without her saying it, Todd knew that her primary goal was to get lost.
* * *
Todd braced himself against the dashboard to stop himself from shaking, but the effort only made things worse. Nearly twenty minutes had passed since Chloe drove them out of Red Grove and back onto the highway. Not a word passed between them, but the inside of the car was tense in the bombed out aftermath of their confrontation with Samael. Night had fallen and the air surrounding them was black as crude oil. Every time he tried to catch his breath, he saw himself suspended in the air by Samael, the ghostly fist reared back to strike, his life on the threshold of its end.
“J-Jesus, I can’t stop sh-shaking.”
Chloe pulled over and slammed on the brakes.
“What are you doing?”
She didn’t respond. She kept her hands locked tightly on the steering wheel and drew in a sharp gasp. Todd leaned back and tried to catch his own breath.
“I can’t believe it.” He curled his hands into tight fists, held them together and released them. His normal breathing still hadn’t returned, but he no longer felt like he was going to have a heart attack. “I don’t think I’ve ever been… so close to death before.”
He looked at Chloe for acknowledgment. She pressed her head against the steering wheel. Her dark hair fell in front of her face and made it impossible to read.
“What is it?”
She stayed silent. As he struggled to get his breath back to normal, the moments crawled by.
“Chloe?” He heard desperation in his voice.
She raised her head. Fresh tears had sprung from her eyes and glistened in the dashboard lights.