He glanced at his upper arms, relieved that he hadn’t grown a little more hair. That would really freak her out if he’d partially begun to shift while he’d fucked her. Small slips could happen if the sex was good enough.
Good enough? Fuck.
He couldn’t even compare other women to Emma. He’d never totally lost control before, yet he did with her. So much for gentle and slow. He’d gone at her as if he’d been the one in heat. He dared to breathe through his nose, and the scent of her made him stifle a groan. His dick stiffened and engorged with blood. He wanted her again. She smelled like pure sex and heaven to him. Better than food to a starving man, or any than damn thing he’d ever scented.
Emma opened her eyes and he stared into them. He saw a spark of confusion, quickly followed by fear. He didn’t blame her, if she was thinking or feeling anything close to what he was experiencing. He was a bit confused and scared too.
What if she was his mate? Life couldn’t be that fucked up.
Red might be kin to his clan leader but his uncle had expectations. Uncle Velder had made it clear that he depended on Red to do what his sons hadn’t.
Shit. This is so bad.
His uncle could ask him to leave with Emma if she was his mate. Other clans might not want them either if Vampires were after her. It would be putting their young at risk if they were attacked because of someone they didn’t know, nor care about. He’d have to protect her on his own and live in the human world if that were the case. He wasn’t sure he could keep her safe under those circumstances.
Emma caressed his shoulder and he quivered. It felt too good. He longed to have her stroke every part of him…
It was another sign of a possible mate, and he needed to put space between them. Otherwise he’d fuck her again until he did something stupid, like bite her. One drop of her blood could seal them together forever if he went nuts. He’d mate her if she was the one—and nothing would stop him. Not even the fact that he hadn’t discussed it with her first. He’d just claim what was his and consequences be damned.
His dick throbbed, reminding him that he was inside her. He slowly withdrew, clenching his teeth because it felt so incredible that he never wanted to leave. It was with deep regret that he pulled out. He had to shift his hips a little so he wasn’t lined up to enter her again. He wanted to do that more than taking his next breath.
“Red?”
Her whispered voice sounded puzzled, making him reconsider his actions. She might be going into heat. That meant he had triggered it. Distance was needed between them before it was too late. But he didn’t want to hurt her feelings or make things worse by just pulling away. That meant he had to explain what was going on.
He just hoped she’d understand.
“We need to stop.”
“You’re still hard. I felt you.” Pink rushed to her cheeks. “I…we could do it again.”
She was naïve in so many ways. It tore at his guts. He’d love to agree. She wanted him too. He almost lost his will to do the right thing.
It was one of the toughest things he’d ever done when he lifted, putting a little space between their chests. He couldn’t resist glancing down. She had beautiful breasts, and he actually salivated, wanting to play with them with his mouth. She did taste so sweet. He could lick her all over.
He turned his head and closed his eyes, breathing through his mouth. It didn’t help much. His heart raced and he fought with desire. It almost overpowered him. He wanted Emma too much.
“Fuck!”
He needed to put more space between them or he was going to lose his willpower. He shoved himself up and rolled toward the edge of the bed, tearing out of her hold. She wasn’t strong enough to keep a tight grip on him. He got to his feet and took a few steps away. He stopped, feeling torn between wanting to get back in bed with her and running outdoors to find fresh air not saturated with her scent.
Her breathing changed. He was very aware of everything about her. He could even hear her erratic heartbeat. She shifted on his bed, the noise so slight, but he could still detect it. He took a few deep breaths through his mouth, forcing his mind to conquer the urges of his body.
“Red? What’s wrong?”
He shook his head and turned. She had sat up and pulled the cover over her breasts and lap. It helped cool some of his desire. He could see she was baffled, and he was even pretty sure that slightly pained expression on her face meant he’d hurt her feelings. He understood.
“I wanted to bite you.” He just blurted it out.
She eased her grip on the blanket and reached up, gently touching the spots where he’d used his fangs to hold her in place. The red marks were more vivid now, would probably leave a bruise. A love bite without broken sink, thankfully.
“It would have been okay.”
Yeah, she is too naïve.
“You said VampLycans can bite during sex. I wouldn’t have freaked out on you.”
She was almost urging him to do it. He took a step closer to her, tempted. He fisted his hands at his sides and halted. “I need to shower.” And put space between us. Wash off your scent. Find my damn sanity. My control is slipping.
Her gaze lowered to his dick. He knew what she saw. He was rock hard still, and probably would remain that way for as long as she stayed in his vicinity. She looked up at his face and frowned. It made his chest hurt when he saw the shine of unshed tears fill her eyes. She curled her knees up tight to her body under his blanket, grasping it with one hand, seeming to take a protective posture.
“Okay.”
He’d hurt her, alright. It was the last thing he wanted. “You don’t understand.”
She turned her head away, staring at part of his bed. “Yes, I do.”
“What do you think you understand?” His temper sparked just a little.
“Go take your shower. The food is getting cold.”
She wouldn’t look at him again and there was definite pain in her voice. He spun in the opposite direction and walked to where he kept his spare clothes, grabbing a loose pair of cotton running shorts. He put them on. They didn’t hide the fact that he was still sporting a major boner but it made him feel a little more secure being so close to her, now that both of them were partially covered. He faced her again.
“Emma.”
“What?” She fingered the fur on his bed.
“Goddamn it,” he snarled.
That made her lift her head and stare into his eyes. The tears were still there and it ripped at his guts. She said nothing. He had plenty to say.
“I wanted to bite you.”
“That’s what you said.”
“That would be bad.”
“Because I’m too human. Got it.”
“I didn’t say that.” He paused. It was true though. He’d have bitten her to find out for certain if she was his mate if she’d been from one of the clans. “I have accepted a blood oath to keep you safe. That means even from myself.”
“You didn’t plan to rip out my throat, did you?” She scowled.
“No.”
“Then what are you trying to say?”
He didn’t dare draw any closer. “I wanted to bite you because…I think it’s possible you could be the one.”
Her lips parted and her eyes widened.
“My mate. You smell too good and too tempting, Emma. Do you understand? What happened between us became too intense. It wasn’t normal. I’m also pretty sure my pheromones are screwing up yours. I could send you into full-blown heat if I don’t get away from you. You’re reacting to me too strongly—as in Lycan response. Understand?”
She chewed on her bottom lip, studying him. She blinked a few times and her expression changed to what he guessed was anger. “Let’s end this conversation now. You should go take that shower.”
“I don’t want you to be hurt.”
“I’m not.” She shoved the blanket away and stood.
His knees almost gave way beneath him when the sight of her bared breasts
and every other inch of her was revealed. It made him want her all over again. His erection became painful as it strained against the material of the shorts, bent at an awkward angle. He reached down and adjusted.
Emma watched him do it and stalked closer. He would take her to the floor to fuck her if she touched him. All self-restraint would be gone.
But she passed him, keeping inches of space between them. He turned his head, watching her hips sway as she entered the living room area. She bent and he twisted fully, staring at her ass. He wanted to rush over there and shove down his shorts to get them out of his way. The image of turning her a little, pinning her over the arm of the couch and fucking her from behind, filled his head.
She yanked clothes out of her bag and straightened, dressing as he watched. He hated seeing her cover her body. He didn’t protest though. Just held himself still, her every movement holding his rapt attention. She ignored him to enter the kitchen next. It was as if he no longer existed to her.
It pissed him off.
“Emma?”
She was ignoring him. She proceeded to eat while standing at the counter, her back to him. She had to have heard him. He knew it would be smart to go take that shower and cool his lust.
Instead, he took a few steps closer to her.
“Emma,” he growled.
She raised one delicate hand over her shoulder. It was fisted. Her middle finger shot up and she held that pose for a few seconds before dropping it from his sight.
That was it. She was a spitfire, and she’d certainly got his blood boiling. He advanced, telling himself it was a bad idea. But it happened too fast for him to reason with himself.
He gripped her hips and spun her around, pinning her against the counter.
She gasped, and he hated the flash of fear he saw as he peered down at her. He’d never hurt her. He was aware of their size differences though, understanding why she might be wary. She was too damn short and small. A VampLycan female was more robust and sturdier.
He gentled his hold.
“Don’t flip me off.”
“Or you’ll what? Hit me?” She raised her chin defiantly and her anger seemed to override her fear. “Bite me? Toss me out of your metal coffin buried in the ground? Go ahead. I told you we shouldn’t have sex. You wouldn’t listen.” She reached up and pushed on his chest. “Let go of me. I’m too human to touch.”
She was driving him insane already. “Do you want to be mated to me?”
Confusion clouded her eyes. She didn’t answer him.
“That’s what I think will happen if I taste your blood. I’d mate you, damn it! I wouldn’t even ask. I nearly lost my mind while I was inside you.” He leaned closer and bent his legs a little to put their faces closer together. “I’d bite you, and make you bite me. I’d fuck you for days, until we were starving and I had no choice but to leave to get more food. But I wouldn’t want to do so until our bond had grown strong. I wouldn’t be able to part from you even for a short time otherwise.”
She looked stunned. He didn’t blame her. She said nothing while he took a few ragged breaths. He calmed, barely.
“My uncle wants me to mate to a VampLycan on top of everything else. Both of his sons mated half-breeds with human blood. I told him I wouldn’t let him down. I hate to break my word…but you’re making me rethink that, Emma. Do you understand? That’s how tempted I am to test a mating. Say the word and I’ll bite you. Just know that if I react the way I think I will, your ass is going to be mated to me in the next ten minutes.”
Her features softened and she stopped pushing against his chest. Her palms just rested there. He liked her touch too much. Hell, he wanted to pull her into his arms and kiss her. It would end with them back on his bed and his fangs buried in some part of her anatomy, along with his dick. He refrained.
“Getting out of that bed was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Can you comprehend that? Don’t make this worse than it already is by taking my actions wrong, Emma. You would be running from me if you knew how bad I want to rip off your clothes and fuck you again.”
She glided her hands from his chest to his shoulders. He closed his eyes at the sparks of pleasure she gave him and made the mistake of inhaling through his nose. Her clothes did a poor job of hiding her scent. He groaned.
“Red?”
He opened his eyes and stared down at her. “What?” He wanted to wince at how gruff his voice came out.
“Go shower.” Her anger appeared gone. “I thought you regretted having sex, or that you were just using me for a one-time deal. I get it now. I do. You didn’t expect to react to me that way. I don’t know you well enough to make that kind of commitment if you did bite me, and it turns out that you like my blood.” She softened her tone. “We’re okay. I’ll warm the food for you while you wash.”
React to her that way? Like her blood? That was putting it mildly. He wanted to snarl. She just didn’t understand. It wasn’t her fault, though. She’d been raised by a Vampire.
He let go of her hips with reluctance and inched away until her hands weren’t touching him anymore. He spun, making a hasty retreat into the bathroom.
He closed the door and flipped on the light, stripping. Icy water pelted him when he twisted the knobs and it helped cool his overheated body and libido. He dumped shampoo into his hand and held it close to his nose, hoping it would help him forget her scent long enough to get total control of his mind and body.
His life had undergone a drastic change in the space of a day. Yesterday, he’d been contemplating allowing a woman to move into his house to ease his loneliness. His biggest worries had been how he’d handle sharing a bed with someone else every night and whether they could get along without wearing on each other’s nerves.
Then Emma arrived…and now he had to wonder how long he’d last before he tasted her blood. He wanted her to share his bed every single day and night. He didn’t give a damn how they got along. He just wanted her close to him.
“Fuck,” he growled.
Her grandfather was going to be a problem, too. Vampires were territorial. She’d been living with him since the age of four. Malachi would consider Emma part of his nest, and they had that mental bond she’d told him about. It made him feel jealous and irrational. Her grandfather wouldn’t want to let her go, when and if he showed up in Howl to collect her.
It might mean they’d have to fight to the death.
Guilt immediately struck over the brief hope that the Vampires had killed Malachi. She’d never leave if her grandfather didn’t show up to take her away. Red could keep her. It would break Emma’s heart though, and he didn’t want her to suffer grief.
He closed his eyes and fisted the soap, feeling it ooze through his fingers. This wasn’t going to turn out well, no matter how things went down. She’d never forgive him if he ashed her grandfather, and he would if it turned out she was his mate. Nobody would ever take her from him.
He’d kill anyone who tried, even if it were the Vampire who’d raised her.
Emma only started eating again when she heard water come on in the bathroom. Her hand slightly shook.
Red had made everything very clear. She’d thought he was an asshole when he’d rolled off her right after they’d had sex. She’d felt used and stupid for allowing him to take her to bed. It hurt, and then it had made her furious.
But he wanted to bite her. Everything he’d said about a mate replayed in her head. She also understood the promise he’d made to his clan leader to mate a VampLycan. Once again, being mostly human had become a negative against her.
She stared at the door that led to the stairwell out of the den. She should grab her bag and take off while Red showered. It would be doing them both a favor.
The memory of the walk through the woods, being carried over his shoulder, stopped her from following through. She had to be deep in VampLycan territory. It would be like having an open wound and taking a stroll at midnight through a street with a Vampire nest in the vicinity. T
hey’d sniff her out and she’d be surrounded before she could make it a mile.
Her grandfather would come for her as soon as it was safe. That could be days or even weeks. He’d want to make certain he didn’t lead the Vampires to her. She knew the drill. The last time they’d been found, they’d spent a few weeks touring Canada before boarding a flight to New York. From there, they’d gone west. They’d changed identities half a dozen times just to be certain no one could track them. They would have remained safe in their house, but some Vamps had moved into the area.
One call to the Vampire Council and her world had come crashing down.
She lost her appetite and sat on the couch, curling up into a ball. What if her grandpa hadn’t escaped? Eduardo had already defied his master once. Did a jerk like that really care about following laws? He was crazy, and probably just using the council as a means to gain help in finding them. It was possible he was ready to end his own life but determined to take his master out with him.
Her grandpa might never show up for her.
It was a terrifying concept. She’d be alone in the world. She smelled and looked human. She’d have to constantly live on the move every few years to avoid them growing suspicious that she wasn’t one of them when she didn’t age the way she should. The Vampires would kill her outright if they ever guessed her mother had been a VampLycan. Lycan packs would fear and hate her too. The VampLycans probably wouldn’t accept her because she was too human to shift. GarLycans would hate her just because her grandfather was a Vampire and she carried some of his blood in her veins.
Screwed any way I look at it.
Overwhelming sadness choked her. She and her grandfather had always been outcasts but at least they’d had each other to depend on. He has to be alive. He’s coming for me. She needed to believe that.
The water cut off in the bathroom and she wiped away the tears. Red had finished with his shower.
Red was another example of how her heritage would never allow her to have any kind of normal life. She hadn’t missed the look in his eyes when he’d told her about the promise he’d made. He might have said he’d risk breaking his word, but he seemed like an honorable man. That would hurt someone like him. He’d grow to resent her if she allowed him to bite her and take her for his mate. A lifetime with a bitter partner sounded like hell on Earth.