Just take his hand.
Leap with him into the night.
It would break every expectation anyone had ever had of her, and a wild, desperate part of her wanted to smash every one of them.
Holding his gaze, she put her fingers into his.
“I can’t,” she whispered. “We shouldn’t.”
“Fuck what we should or shouldn’t do,” he told her.
Even as he said it, he started to smile. She could see that he knew how insane he sounded. She stepped closer to him so she could feel the warmth of his presence again wrapping around her like a hug.
“Thank you for coming to check on me,” she said. “But we need to ride this out. Remember, standing your ground is not passivity. We might discover something useful.” She looked up at him. “We might save lives.”
He heaved an aggrieved-sounding sigh, but his hand tightened on hers. “I broke your rules,” he said. “I’m sorry.”
A smile broke over her face. He stared at her, his expression arrested. “I am so glad you did,” she told him.
The door to her bedroom slammed open. Linwe, two guards and Ferion burst inside. They all carried weapons. Ferion and one of the guards pointed handguns at Graydon as they strode across the room to the open balcony doors.
Unhurriedly, Graydon folded her hand against his chest. His gentle smile widened, his eyes steady. How could she not want to gaze at him forever?
But she didn’t. Instead, she turned as unhurriedly as Graydon to face the quartet of unsettled, angry Elves in the doorway.
“There’s no need for alarm,” she said in a quiet, calm voice. It was one of the hardest things she had ever done, since she felt anything but quiet and calm. “Please put your weapons down. I’m only getting a visit from an old friend.”
Ferion’s and the guard’s guns lowered a little.
But, she noticed, they didn’t lower the guns very much. Linwe stared at Ferion, and the other guard’s eyes widened with consternation.
“What are you doing here?” Ferion asked Graydon. His voice sounded flat and expressionless, almost as if he were an automaton.
“I’m saying hello to Bel,” Graydon replied. Like Bel, he spoke quietly, without undue aggression, although standing so close to him, she could feel his Power bristle with unseen spikes. She knew he was on a hair trigger, holding his own instincts barely in check. “Do you always bring loaded weapons into your mother’s bedroom?”
Ferion bared his teeth in a smile. “I do when there is an intruder. You’re trespassing on Elven territory, Wyr.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Bel said. Her fingers tightened on Graydon’s. “There’s no intruder here. Graydon was passing by, and I invited him to stop for a few minutes.”
“You didn’t inform any of the guards this was going to happen.” Ferion gestured, and the guard holstered his gun. He lowered his own Glock but continued to hold it. She might not be able to read him any longer, but his body language was tense.
“It was an impulse decision,” she said gently. “Graydon had only just landed. You showed up more quickly than I could think to call down. I had no idea I was being watched with such care. Thank you for looking out for me.”
Now both guards turned to watch Ferion, while Linwe regarded her with a troubled, baffled expression. Bel could tell that the younger Elf sensed that something was seriously wrong.
Linwe said brightly, “Graydon, it’s great to see you! You should have said you were stopping by.”
Bel bit back a smile as Linwe rushed over to throw her arms around Graydon. Smiling, he hugged her back. “Like Bel said, it was an impulse visit.”
“Step out of the room,” Ferion said to the guards. As Linwe gave him an uncertain look, he added, “You too.”
Linwe looked to Bel for confirmation. In that moment, any hint of doubt Bel might have had about the younger woman vanished. Linwe was clearly on her side.
Bel told her, “Go on, do as you’re told. Have a good night.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
The three Elves left the room, although Linwe trailed behind the two guards and looked distinctly unhappy about it.
As soon as they had left, Ferion turned to confront Bel and Graydon.
He demanded, “What the hell are you two doing?”
THIRTEEN
She couldn’t hold back asking any longer. “Who is asking, you or Malphas?”
When at first he didn’t answer, her widened gaze flew to Graydon’s in alarm.
Even as Graydon started to speak, Ferion said, “Your question is not quite accurate. Malphas can’t possess me like some bodiless demon.”
Graydon’s eyes narrowed. “But he can give you orders and compel you to obey. Is he compelling you right now?”
“He’s always had that ability.” The blood had left Ferion’s face, and his lips were white.
“That isn’t an answer.” Bel stepped toward him, her fists clenched.
Ferion didn’t respond. Instead, he looked at her steadily.
All of a sudden, she saw her son again in his gaze, her good, loving, flawed son. Her eyes filled with moisture, and she strode over to throw her arms around him. He held her tightly.
Graydon asked, “Has Malphas compelled you to do things in the past?”
The muscles in Ferion’s arms grew rigid. He put his face in her hair and didn’t answer.
After suspecting for so long, both relief and fury swept through her. She said over her shoulder to Graydon, “Silence is its own answer.”
“Yes, it is,” Graydon growled. “So he has already broken the bargain, and it’s up to us to prove it and hold him accountable.”
Her breathing had turned ragged with her emotions. This was the kind of risk one suffered when one bargained with a pariah. For law-abiding Djinn, if a bargain was not upheld, one could present a case to the Demonkind council. If the case was proven, the Djinn would need to make reparation.
No such strictures bound a pariah. They had already been judged by the Djinn and found wanting, and had been barred from society. The only way to stir others to action was by proving that the pariah was doing too much damage to tolerate—because going against a Djinn came at such a high cost.
Everything was stacked in Malphas’s favor. He could cheat while knowing the cost to hold him accountable was too expensive, whereas if she and Graydon broke their side of the bargain, he would . . .
What would he do? Tell the world that they had slept together two hundred years ago? Other than a mild titillation and perhaps a tabloid headline, the world would yawn in his face.
Would he kill the High Lord of the Elven demesne? If he did, he would be signing his own death warrant, because nobody—nobody in all the Elder Races—would allow him to commit such a crime and get away with it.
But if he was pushed into a corner, he could torture Ferion with more extreme acts of control—and that was the one possibility that was so unendurable. She simply couldn’t bear to watch it happen.
Hold steady, she thought. Stay the course. Play the long game.
“Ferion,” Graydon said. “What if Malphas ordered you to hurt Beluviel?”
Ferion’s arms loosened from around her, and he stepped back. His expression turned tender and trapped at once. He whispered, “I would do everything in my power to fight it.”
“Yet, you can’t swear for certain that you wouldn’t do it. Just like the first time.”
The first time, when he had choked Bel because Malphas had ordered him to. Silence again, weighted and toxic with everything left unsaid.
Ferion turned away. “I would have to fight anyone who tried to stop me from doing what I was ordered to do, but then I’m sure you remember that. It doesn’t mean I would have to win. I can always be killed.”
“Don’t say that,” she said between her teeth.
> When he glanced at her, the frozen, tight lines of his face softened.
He said, “I’ve been living for two hundred years as both hostage and slave, all because I couldn’t control myself when I really needed to. It doesn’t matter if I’m sorry. It doesn’t matter if I grew up a hell of a lot and learned my lesson, or if I would die before I ever did it again. Every time I think this situation can’t go on or get any worse, somehow it does. So far Malphas hasn’t forced me to do anything catastrophic. It’s been the small things, the mean, sneaky things that keep me from sleeping and eat at my soul.”
“You never said anything,” she murmured, stricken.
His gaze turned wry. “What could I have said? Anything would have made you feel worse, more trapped. I love you too much to put you through that. But now that I’ve become the High Lord, and the Elven demesne has stabilized, we all know the situation has changed.”
“What do you suggest we do?” Graydon asked.
Ferion’s reply was immediate. “I take responsibility. Because of my addiction, people have been hurt, and I would pay any price to bring this hell to an end. So I want you both to do what you have to do to end this, and I will have no choice but to do what I must. And I want you to know that whatever happens, you have my blessing.”
Graydon’s immobility caught her attention. He watched Ferion, his face expressionless, and somehow that frightened her more than anything.
As she watched, his demeanor shifted. His expression became mild and innocuous. Even his body language changed.
“I don’t really catch your drift, buddy,” he said. He rolled his broad shoulders in an easygoing shrug. “I just stopped by to say hey to Bel. You know, two old friends taking a few minutes to play catch-up.”
As Ferion turned to stare at him, Graydon told him in a quiet voice, “We haven’t abandoned you, son, and we haven’t broken any bargains. We won’t, either. Aside from the fact that you know you can trust your mother, you have my word on that.”
An expression crossed Ferion’s face, one that Bel hadn’t seen in a very long time. It was vulnerable, even hopeful. He whispered, “Thank you. Please don’t let me do anything to hurt the Elven demesne or my mother.”
“Like I said, there’s no reason for us to go there.” Graydon gave him an easy smile. Even to Bel’s hypersensitive hearing, every word he said sounded sincere. She could fudge and tell a certain number of untruths while sounding sincere, but Graydon’s talent for lying had hers beat. “Even if you’ve been ordered to keep an eye on her, she’s not doing anything but normal activities. Seeing friends and attending parties. You know, getting a breath of fresh air after a hard six months of work. Isn’t that right, Bel?”
Halfway through, she realized what Graydon was doing. He was feeding Ferion the kind of information that the other man could give to Malphas.
It didn’t matter what Ferion personally thought of what Graydon was telling him. If pressed, he would be able to repeat exactly what Graydon had said, and he would be able to claim it sounded like the truth.
She could tell when Ferion realized it as well. A slight smile spread across his features. “With that kind of reassurance, perhaps I can ease up on the number of guards I’ve set to watch over her.” He met her gaze. “Linwe can report to me.”
“Of course she can,” said Bel. She could tell the younger woman to report only simple, innocent activities and to cover for her when she might disappear. Poor Linwe would be very confused, but she would comply. “It will be a remarkably boring task, I assure you.”
Her son inclined his head. “Very well.”
“Ferion,” said Graydon, “do you know what Malphas can sense? How closely does he watch you?”
The younger male rubbed the back of his neck, frustration evident in his tight body language. “I think he can’t sense my activities unless I can sense him. I’ve become attuned to his presence, maybe because of the bond between us. But he doesn’t have to spy on me. He knows I have to follow his orders—or at least the letter of his orders. While he’s slipped up once or twice, usually he’s very detailed at giving orders that don’t allow much wiggle room, no doubt because of his Djinn nature and bargaining experience.”
Graydon raised his eyebrows. “If you’re more attuned to his presence, perhaps Bel and I are too.”
Ferion shrugged. “You might be. He said once that he would feel it if you broke the bargain. Something to do with the connection he established with you. Other than that, he can’t spy on us all the time.” He paused, and his expression turned uncertain, searching. Hesitantly, he continued, “If I were to guess, I think he’s spread very thin.”
Satisfaction flashed through her. He was trying to figure out the boundaries of his confinement and help them any way he could.
Graydon said in her head, That would make sense, if Malphas’s network of slaves has grown. But even so, Ferion would remain one of his highest priorities.
She said quickly, “I think we’ve talked enough about this.” She added privately to Graydon, If Malphas thinks to ask him what we’ve discussed, Ferion will have to tell him.
Agreed.
Clearly, Ferion thought of that as well, because he said, “I believe we have, too.”
She turned back to him. “What are you going to tell Malphas about this, if he asks?”
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Graydon nod in approval.
“I will say that Graydon stopped by for a brief visit.” Ferion smiled. “And that my mother is doing exactly what she does on every trip to New York, and the reports from my guard confirms it. Normal activities. Seeing friends, attending parties.” He said to Graydon, “You should leave now.”
Graydon said comfortably, “Sure, no problem.” He didn’t move.
Bel said in a firm voice, “Good night, Ferion.”
The Elven male hesitated. Then he said, “Good night.”
As he stepped out of the bedroom, she took a deep breath and let the tension leave her spine. What a strange, heartbreaking yet hopeful conversation.
Taking her by the elbow, Graydon gently nudged her out onto the snowy balcony again. As she complied, he pulled the doors closed behind them.
Silently, he told her, It’s late at night, in December. I doubt there are any surveillance cameras out here. Even if there are, they can’t hear what we say telepathically. He pulled her into his arms, and she went willingly, burying her face in his warm, strong neck. As he cupped the back of her head, he asked, How do you think it went?
As well as can be expected, and better than I had feared. She sighed, losing herself in his clean, male scent and the warm strength of his large body. We were all as careful as we could be. I think Ferion will try his hardest to do what he said he would—but we still can’t trust him.
Much as she wanted to. Much as, she now believed, he truly deserved.
I agree. Graydon rubbed his face in her hair.
She could feel every finger as he spread his hand against her and rubbed her back. The sensation was soothing and arousing at once. Warmth spread through her, and an ache grew in the private place between her thighs. She bit her lips, wanting so badly to act on her feelings and yet not daring.
He added, When it comes to Ferion, we need to think in probabilities, not assurances. And we need to think of how to get you out of here without triggering any response from him, or Malphas.
Both you and Ferion opened that door, she told him. Now I’m going to walk through it. You’re going to leave, and I’ll call Linwe in here and tell her we’re going for a walk. I like to walk in Central Park. For me, it’s a perfectly normal activity.
Good gods, Bel. Tell me you don’t go walking in Central Park at night. He sounded concerned and amused at once.
She pulled back to tilt an eyebrow at him. Do you really think anyone would see me, if I chose for them not to?
A
smile creased his face. You have a point. He sobered. As soon as you’re out, I’ll come get you. We can still have that meeting tonight after all.
Her pulse quickened at the thought. Yes. I’ll be a half an hour—no later than an hour at the most, I promise.
His gaze darkening, he laid a big hand along the side of her cheek. For a moment, he didn’t say anything, and neither did she. Promise though she might to meet him, it was still not a certainty.
She would probably meet him in no later than an hour.
Ferion would probably keep his word. At least, now she knew he wanted to.
Graydon muttered, You could still come with me now.
Just take your hand and fly into the night, she whispered back, smiling at him. How she wanted to. She couldn’t think of anything more perfect.
Yes. He took her hand to his mouth and pressed a kiss into her palm. At the sensation of his lips against her sensitive skin, hot pleasure weakened the muscles in her legs.
She forced herself to remain coherent. I can’t just go with you. I don’t think we dare be that overt. We need to try to give at least the illusion of some normality, in order to support the lie. It isn’t only Ferion we need to be mindful of. Malphas might actually have other spies in the Elven household. If he’s spread thin, as Ferion’s surmised, what more logical way to keep an eye on one of his most valuable investments? That’s what I would do.
Air hissed between his teeth as he sucked in a breath. I hadn’t considered that possibility.
You’ve been busy, she told him. Unable to keep from touching him, she pressed one hand over his, at her cheek, smiling up at him.
His gaze grew heavy-lidded, piercing. Slowly, he lowered his head. He gave her plenty of time to realize his intent and pull away.
Even as she noticed it with one part of her mind, the rest of her grew fevered. She felt crazed by desire. She needed to feel his lips against hers so badly, she couldn’t stand it. Raising up on her tiptoes, she met his open mouth with hers.
The breath left his body in a shudder, as if he had slammed into a wall. Suddenly he crushed her against his chest, kissing her with the same kind of rampant hunger that swept through her like wildfire.