“Bram’s feeling just as bad,” she retorted.
“That doesn’t justify the way you talked to her.”
He looked like he was ready to give up on her. She wanted to cry, but she’d kill herself first, so she tore open the cover-up and threw it down in the sand. She felt naked, but Aaron only looked at her face. When she’d been on the streets, the men had hardly ever looked at her face. “Are you satisfied?” she cried.
“Are you?” he asked.
She wasn’t satisfied with much of anything about herself, and she was sick of being afraid. Leaving the house made her nervous. She was scared to take her GED. Scared of so much. “If I’m nice to people, they’ll start to take advantage of me,” she cried.
“If they start taking advantage of you,” he said quietly, “stop being nice to them.”
Her skin prickled. Did it really have to be all or nothing? She thought of what he’d said earlier, that she had friends who’d watch out for her. She hated depending on other people, but maybe that was because she’d never been able to. Aaron was right. She did have friends now, but she still acted like she was alone in her fight against the world. She didn’t like knowing he thought of her as a mean person. Being mean wouldn’t save her from anything. She studied her feet. “Don’t give up on me, okay?”
“I can’t,” he said. “I’m too curious to see how you’re going to turn out when you grow up.”
She looked back up at him and saw this funny expression on his face. He wasn’t looking at her body or even taking his eyes off her, but she was aware of him in a way that made her feel…itchy or thirsty. Something. “Are you ready to swim yet?” she said. “Or do you want to stand here all day psychoanalyzing me?”
“Swim.”
“That’s what I thought.”
She raced for the water, feeling almost free. Maybe it wouldn’t last, but for now it felt good.
Georgie edited film during the day and wandered around the more squalid streets of Hollywood and West Hollywood at night, with only her camera and her famous face for protection. Most of the girls she approached recognized her and were more than willing to talk into her camera lens.
She discovered a mobile health clinic that served street kids. Again, her fame paid off, and the health care workers let her ride with them each night as they offered HIV and STD testing, crisis counseling, condoms, and disease prevention education. What she saw and heard during those nights left her heartsick. She kept imagining Chaz among these girls and thinking about where she’d be without Bram’s intervention.
Two weeks slipped by, and he made no attempts to see her. She was exhausted to the point of numbness, but she couldn’t sleep more than a few hours before she jerked awake, her pajamas damp with sweat, the sheets twisted around her. She desperately missed the man she’d believed Bram to be, the man who’d harbored a caring heart beneath his cynical exterior. Only her work and the knowledge that she’d done the right thing by not giving up her soul for the sake of revenge kept her from despair.
Since the paps weren’t prone to lurk in the neighborhoods she visited, no photos of her popped up. Even though she’d ordered Aaron to stop feeding the tabloids his stories of marital bliss, he kept on doing it. She no longer cared. Let Bram deal with it.
On a Friday three weeks after her breakup with Bram, Aaron called and told her to log on to Variety. When she did, she saw the announcement:
Casting has been completed on Tree House, Bram Shepard’s film adaptation of Sarah Carter’s best-selling novel. In a surprise move, Anna Chalmers, a virtually unknown indie actress, has been signed for Helene, the demanding female lead.
Georgie gazed at the screen. It was over. Now Bram no longer had a need to convince her of his undying love, which explained why he hadn’t tried to talk to her again. She forced on her sneakers and took a beach walk. Her defenses were down, and she was exhausted, or she wouldn’t have let herself drift into a sitcom world where Bram would show up at her door, throw himself on his knees, and beg for her love and forgiveness.
Disgusted with herself, she headed back to the house.
The next morning her phone rang while she was at her computer. She dragged herself out of her stupor and squinted at the display on her cell. It was Aaron. He’d flown to Kansas for the weekend to celebrate his father’s sixtieth birthday. She cleared the muzziness from her voice. “How’s the family reunion?”
“Fine, but Chaz is sick. I just got off the phone, and she sounded really bad.”
“What’s wrong with her?”
“She wouldn’t tell me, but she almost sounded like she was crying. I told her to find Bram, but she doesn’t know where he is.”
Not in Malibu, Georgie thought, trying to win me back.
“I’m worried about her,” Aaron went on. “Do you think…”
“I’ll drive over,” she said.
As she pulled out onto the highway, the sitcom began to play again in her head. She saw herself walking into Bram’s house and discovering balloons everywhere. Dozens of them floating at the ceiling with their ribbons drifting in the air. And she saw Bram standing in the middle of them, his expression soft, anxious, tender.
“Surprise!”
She punched the accelerator and pulled herself back to reality.
Not a single balloon floated in the empty, quiet house, and the man who’d betrayed her was nowhere in sight. With the paparazzi once again staking out the end of the drive, she’d left her car at Rory’s and slipped through the back gate. She set down her purse and called Chaz’s name. There was no response.
She made her way through the empty kitchen into the back hallway and up the stairs to Chaz’s apartment above the garage. She wasn’t surprised to find it simply decorated and scrupulously neat. “Chaz? Are you okay?”
A moan came from what seemed to be the only bedroom. She discovered Chaz lying on top of a crumpled gray quilt, her knees pulled to her chest, her face pale. She groaned as she saw Georgie. “Aaron called you.”
Georgie hurried to the side of the bed. “What’s wrong?”
She clutched her knees tighter. “I can’t believe he called you.”
“He was worried. He said you were sick, and obviously he was right.”
“I have cramps.”
“Cramps?”
“Cramps. That’s all. I sometimes get ’em like this. Now go away.”
“Did you take anything?”
“I ran out.” Her words were nearly a wail. “Leave me alone.” She turned her face into the pillow and said, more softly, “Please.”
Please? Chaz must really be sick. Georgie fetched some Tylenol from Bram’s kitchen, made a cup of tea, and carried it back to the apartment. On her way to the bedroom, she saw a GED workbook open on the coffee table along with a couple of used yellow pads and pencils. She smiled, her first one of the week.
“I can’t believe Aaron called you,” Chaz said again after she’d taken the pills. “You drove all the way from Malibu to give me some Tylenol?”
“Aaron was pretty upset.” Georgie set the bottle on the bedside table. “And you’d have done the same for me.”
That drew Chaz out of her misery. “He was upset?”
Georgie nodded and held out the hot, sugared tea. “I’ll leave you alone now.”
Chaz pulled herself up far enough to take the mug. “Thanks,” she muttered. “I mean it.”
“I know,” Georgie said as she left the room.
She picked up a couple of things she’d left behind, being careful not to even glance in the bedroom. As she came back downstairs, a wash of golden afternoon light splashed through the windows. She’d loved this house. Its nooks and spaces. She’d loved the potted lemon trees and Tibetan throws, the Aztec stone fireplace mantel and warm wooden floors. She’d loved the bookshelf-lined dining room and brass wind-bells. How could the man who’d designed such a welcoming home have such an empty, hostile heart?
And that’s when he walked in.
Chapte
r 27
Bram’s shocked expression clearly announced she was the last person on earth he expected—or wanted—to see. Her own face was chalky from too many late nights, and her eyes shadowed, but he looked ready for a GQ shoot. He had a crisp new haircut, almost as short as he’d worn it during their Skip and Scooter days, and she could have sworn his fingernails looked professionally manicured.
She couldn’t bear having him think she’d sought him out. “Chaz is sick,” she said flatly. “I drove over to check on her, and now I’m leaving.”
She set her shoulders and crossed the room toward the veranda, but he was at her side before she could touch the knob. “Don’t take another step.”
“No drama, Bram. I don’t have the stomach for it.”
“We’re actors. We thrive on drama.” He grabbed her by the shoulders and turned her to face him. “I haven’t gone through all this, for you to walk out on me.”
The fury she thought she’d conquered burst into flame. “Gone through all what? What have you gone through? Look at you! You’re not even wrinkled. You’ve been having the time of your life!”
“Is that how you see it?”
“You’re producing and starring in a great movie. All your dreams have come true.”
“Not exactly. I screwed up with you, remember? The most important person in my life.” He trapped her against the French doors. “And I’m trying to fix that.”
She gave a dismissive snort. “How?”
He gazed down at her, his stormy eyes telegraphing an Actors Studio version of a tortured soul. “I love you, Georgie.”
Fireworks flashed before her eyes. “And why is that?”
“Because I do. Because you’re you.”
“You sound sincere. You look sincere.” She sneered and shoved his arm away. “But I’m not buying a word of it.”
Someone less cynical might believe honest pain tightened the corner of his mouth. “What happened that day on the beach…,” he said. “I know exactly how ugly it was, but I also got the wake-up call I needed.”
“Aww, that’s swell.”
“I knew you wouldn’t believe me, and I can’t even blame you.” He jammed his hands into his pockets. “Just listen, Georgie. We’ve cast Helene. It’s a done deal. What ulterior motive could I still have left?”
No more of the quiet suffering that had followed her breakup with Lance. She let it all spew out. “Let’s start with your career. Three and a half months ago, I was the person willing to sacrifice everything to protect my image, but now it’s you. Your unsavory past was blocking your future, and you used me to fix it.”
“That doesn’t—”
“Tree House isn’t some once-in-a-lifetime project for you. It’s the first part of a carefully planned strategy to establish yourself as a respectable actor and producer.”
“There’s nothing wrong with having ambition.”
“There is when you still want to use me to prop up your image as Mr. Trustworthy.”
“This is Hollywood, Georgie! The promised land of the divorced. Who the hell—other than Rory Keene—cares whether we stay married?”
“Rory Keene. Exactly!”
“You don’t really think I want this marriage to last just so I don’t lose Rory’s good opinion?”
“Isn’t that what you’ve been doing?”
“What I was doing. But that’s over. I’m more than happy to stake my career on the quality of my work, not on my marriage.”
Her heart had grown calluses, and she didn’t believe a word of it. “You’ll say anything to avoid a public rift, but I’m done with faking it just so people I don’t know will believe I’m someone I’m not. I’m ordering Aaron to stop talking to the press. And this time, I’ll make sure he does what I say.”
“The hell you are.” The transformation started in his eyes, where cold calculation shifted into mulish determination. And then he went a little nuts. He gave her a hard kiss then half pushed, half shoved her ahead of him toward the back hallway. “You’re coming with me.”
She tripped over her feet, but he had too tight a grip for her to fall. “Let go!”
“I’m taking you for a ride,” he retorted.
“Like that’s something new.”
“Shut up.” He pushed her ahead of him into the garage. He wasn’t rough, but he wasn’t exactly gentle either. “It’s time you understand exactly how much I value my respectable reputation.” He looked like the wild man of his past.
“I’m not going anywhere with you.”
“We’ll see about that. I’m stronger than you are, I’m meaner than you are, and I’m a hell of a lot more desperate.”
Her fury burned hotter. “If you’re so desperate, why didn’t you try to talk to me as soon as you finished casting Helene? Why didn’t you—”
“Because I had something I needed to do first!” He shoved her into the car, and the next thing she knew, they were shooting down the drive and out through the gates with two black SUVs peeling after them.
He turned the air conditioner on full blast, too cold for her bare legs and thin T-shirt, but she didn’t ask him to turn it down. She didn’t talk at all. He drove like a maniac, but she was too angry to care. He wanted to break her heart all over again.
They hit Robertson Boulevard, which was bustling with Saturday-afternoon shoppers. She leaned forward in her seat as he screeched to a stop at the valet station in front of The Ivy, the paparazzi’s second home. “Why are you stopping here?”
“So we can make a promotional appearance.”
“You’re not serious.” One of the paps spotted them and tried to photograph them through the windshield. She’d left the beach house without a stitch of makeup. Her hair was a mess, her T-shirt exactly the wrong shade of blue to go with her wrinkled turquoise shorts, and she’d pulled on her beach sneakers instead of sandals. “I’m not getting out dressed like this.”
“You’re the one who doesn’t care about image, remember?”
“There’s a big difference between not caring about image and going to a decent restaurant in dirty shorts and grimy sneakers!”
Three more photographers pressed against the car, with others darting through the traffic to get to them from across the street.
“We’re not eating,” he said. “And I think you’re beautiful.” He jumped out of the car, transferred a wad of bills to the valet, and muscled his way through the shouting photographers to open the passenger door for her.
Mismatched T-shirt and wrinkled shorts. Bad hair, no makeup…and a husband who just might love her but probably didn’t. With a sense of unreality, she got out.
Mayhem erupted. They hadn’t been seen together in weeks, and all the paparazzi starting shouting at once.
“Bram! Georgie! Over here!”
“Where have you two been?”
“Georgie, is Mel Duffy lying about your meeting?”
“Are you pregnant?”
“Are you still together?”
“What’s up with the outfit, Georgie?”
Bram wrapped an arm around her and pushed through the crowd toward the brick steps. “Give us some room, guys. You’ll get your pictures. Just let us have some room.”
Pedestrians gaped on the sidewalk, patio diners craned their necks, and a trio of perfectly dressed purse designers interrupted their conversation to stare. Georgie briefly considered asking to borrow a little lip gloss, but there was something wildly liberating about standing in front of the world looking her worst.
He put his mouth to her ear. “Who needs to call a press conference when we’ve got The Ivy?”
“Bram, I—”
“Listen up, everybody.” He raised his arm.
Georgie felt dizzy, but she somehow managed to curl her mouth in a Scooter-grin. And then she stopped. No more pretense. She was angry, agitated, and sick to her stomach, and she didn’t care who knew it. She let everything she felt show on her face.
A crowd blocked the sidewalk. As shutters click
ed and video cameras recorded the scene, Bram spoke above the noise. “You all know that Georgie and I got married in Las Vegas three months ago. What you don’t know…”
She had no idea how he’d spin this, and she didn’t care. Whatever lies he told were his own to deal with.
“…is that we were the victims of a couple of drug-spiked cocktails, and we basically hated each other’s guts. We’ve been faking this marriage ever since.”
Her head shot up. For a moment she thought she’d misheard. Bram was willing to stand on the front steps of The Ivy and expose it all?
As it turned out, he was. He told everything—a condensed version, but the facts were there, right through the ugly scene on the beach. She studied the determined set of his jaw and found herself thinking of the formidable movie heroes hanging on his office wall.
The paps had more experience with deception than truth, and they weren’t buying a word of it. “You’re punkin’ us, right?”
“No punking,” Bram said. “Georgie’s got this new thing about living an honest life. Too much Oprah.”
“Georgie, are you making Bram do this?”
“Have you two split?”
They attacked like the jackals they were, and Bram shouted them all down. “From now on, whatever we tell you is the truth, but don’t count on us telling you anything we don’t want to, even if we have a movie to promote and need the publicity. As for the future of this marriage…Georgie’s ready to bail on me, but I love my wife, and I’m trying my damnedest to change her mind. That’s all you’re going to hear from either one of us right now. Got it?”
The paps turned rabid, pushing and shoving. Somehow Bram strong-armed the two of them back through the crowd, holding her so tightly that her feet left the ground and she lost a sneaker. The valets managed to wedge the car door open, and she got inside.
As Bram pulled away, he nearly took out the two photographers who’d draped themselves over the hood. “I don’t want to hear another word about ulterior motives.” His dark scowl and unsteady voice left no room for argument. “As a matter of fact, I don’t want to talk at all right now.”