He flung the bloody knife at me. I dodged it, but he grappled with me instead as if he would enjoy using his bare hands to take me down. I punched his jaw, but he barely flinched. Okay, so maybe he wasn’t lying. He shoved me then kicked out as I stumbled. I fell back, unable to keep my balance. He aimed a punch at my side, and I rolled out of his way before jumping to my feet.
We exchanged a few blows, then he grunted and gripped my neck with one hand, pressing against my stomach with the other. His fingers were so close to my injury that I forgot how to breathe as pain wrenched through my torso. The hand around my neck tightened as he pushed me against a wall.
I couldn’t defend myself, couldn’t move at all. Even breathing hurt. He pressed harder against my diaphragm. The action sent what felt like red hot irons through my skin. Was he super observant, or did he already know about my injury?
My vision blurred as something flew past with a whizzing sound. All of a sudden, I was free, still wracked with pain but able to breathe again. My enemy was down, an arrow lodged in his skull.
I looked around to see Leah standing in position, her bow still in her hands. She appeared frozen until Phoenix gently took the weapon away. I recovered as best I could as she got herself together and let Phoenix lead her to me.
With a wry smile, I got to my feet. She launched herself at me, wrapping her arms around my waist. I flinched, biting the inside of my cheek until it bled.
“Your little injury almost got you killed,” Phoenix said quietly as he inspected the tattooed Guardian’s body.
Leah glanced at me in surprise, so I distracted her by asking if she was okay.
“I’m fine,” she said. “You all make it look so easy, and I figured I needed actual practice, but I didn’t think it would feel like this.” She looked at her trembling hands.
“Thank you,” I said, “but you should have run. Don’t take any chances.”
She smiled at me. “And where do we get that from, Ava?”
I glanced at the bodies, shaking my head at the waste of life. “He killed his own,” I whispered. “How could he turn on his Circle like that?”
“We should leave,” Phoenix said as shouts rose from inside the building.
We stayed amongst the trees as much as possible as we ran for the car. I split up from the others to check on the grove, but the young couple had already left, so I followed Phoenix and Leah back to the waiting car.
Phoenix took us home, but he stayed silent for the entire journey. Leah and I got out of the car when the driver parked outside the cul-de-sac.
I leaned into the open door. “You saw the tattoos on his hands, right?”
Phoenix stared straight ahead, his jaw clenched tight. “He was one of those assassins I told you about. The group that came after us. They all have similar tattoos.”
He rubbed his chest and finally looked at me. “Goodbye, Ava.” His eyes were hard and cold, and he looked just like his mother as I shut the car door.
Chapter Five
I managed to get maybe two hours sleep before Carl began banging around in the kitchen. He had a key, and sometimes he slept in Emmett’s old room. Other times, he stayed with Lorcan or Esther instead. He was in a worse state of limbo than I was.
He set a large mug of coffee in front of me as soon as I sat down at the kitchen table.
“I love you,” I said, sniffing the air. I smelled glorious, glorious rashers and eggs.
“Yeah, yeah. Ry asked me yesterday if I was still your minion, and if so, where he could get one.”
I grinned. “Sounds about right.”
“You look like you got punched in the face. Tired again?”
“I didn’t get much sleep last night.” I took a sip of coffee. “If I tell you something, you can’t tell anyone else, okay? Especially not Val.”
“As if. She takes killing the messenger to a whole other level.” He laid a plate of food in front of me and joined me at the table.
“Phoenix was here last night.”
He raised an eyebrow.
“It gets worse. He wanted to warn us that Fionnuala is back. Secretly. Then, somehow, I got roped into going to see the children with him and Leah.” I shook my head at Carl’s gasp of surprise. “I know. Trust me, I know.”
“So what happened?”
“Leah was overwhelmed by the amount of chaotic power there, and then three Guardians showed up. One was tattooed, and he killed his own, just to have a go at me.”
“Shit.”
“The third one had already run for help, so I fought the tattooed Guardian, but in the end, Leah killed him.”
“Leah?”
“Yeah.” I pushed the plate away. “How am I different from Fionnuala if the outcome is the same? Children becoming killers?”
“Shut up and eat your food. You didn’t ask Leah to kill.”
My laugh sounded hollow. “No, I just put the weapon in her hands.”
“What did Phoenix think?”
I shivered at the memory. “He had another mood swing. I’ve no idea what he’s thinking about anything.”
“Be careful,” Carl warned. “He’s not Peter, and you’re not Helena. There’s no magical fix to what you’ve both gone through.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
He gazed at me, warmth in his eyes. “I’m not trying to hurt you. I just want to make sure you don’t make a mistake because you pity him. You can’t save everyone.”
My lips trembled. “We’ve all noticed.”
His face fell. “Ava…”
“I need some space.” I walked out of the room, but my hands wouldn’t stop shaking until he left the house. The people closest to me cut the deepest wounds, each and every time.
Then, I realised I hadn’t heard from Gabe. He hadn’t warned me that Fionnuala was back. Eddie’s words rang clear and true in my head. He would never have taken Gabe on board and allied with the angel. But I had. I had connected myself to him magically. Maybe that was my mistake.
I decided to go to the bar that afternoon, but not until I passed around the warning that Fionnuala had returned. Instead of fear, I found cockiness; the previous fight had boosted everyone’s confidence. Except their confidence in me.
I visited the twins before I left. “Phoenix was here last night,” I told them.
Lorcan’s smile vanished. “What a pity.”
“Maybe you should cut him some slack. He believes you’re his children, and he wants to know you both.”
“So why didn’t we see him last night?” Lorcan demanded.
Lucia moved across the room and stood next to Lorcan.
“I’m not saying any of this will be easy, but he wants to give you answers first. I suppose he feels like he has to earn your trust now or something. So he promised to keep out of your way until he can give you something. A reason, maybe. He believes you’ll need that to repair what’s between you.”
Lorcan’s expression grew cold, but I caught the hope on Lucia’s. “I don’t care what he believes,” Lorcan said.
“Come on,” I said softly. “He’s trying. If you heard him talk… he seems broken by the way he’s missed out on your lives. He hasn’t got a clue what’s going on, but he’s trying. At least give him the chance to—”
“What’s your obsession with him?” Lorcan demanded. “You’re supposed to be one of us. He’s not one of us. He’s the son of someone who could be our greatest enemy, Ava.”
“And he’s your dad. I just… I know what it’s like to miss out on having family. I don’t want you to have any regrets.”
His stern expression softened slightly. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t take it out on you. You’re a friend to us, Ava. We want it to remain that way.”
“So do I. I need you both on my side. I’m not saying we should blindly trust anyone, but if there’s a chance to fix what was done to your family—”
“I have no expectations,” he said. “It’s better that way.”
I nodded. “I get that.??
?
Lucia stretched out her arm, but I moved out of her reach, unwilling to see whatever vision she had in store for me, if any. “I’m, uh, I’m going to check on Gabe. I’m getting worried that he’s changed his mind about helping us.”
I left and headed over to Dita’s to make peace with Carl, but he was busy trying to teach Dita about bookkeeping. She hadn’t been able to go to school, so the entire cul-de-sac had pulled together to keep the learning process going. I doubted her school would ever appreciate the effort we had put into Dita’s lessons. How to skin a rabbit probably wasn’t on the curriculum, but that hadn’t stopped Ry from going into excessive detail.
I reluctantly went to Gabe’s bar, knowing it would only be open to staff at that time of day. When I got there, Gabe was sitting at the bar, a drink in front of him. I took the seat next to him, pretending I didn’t hear him groan.
I nodded at Finn, who looked uncharacteristically worried.
“Why didn’t you tell me she was back?” I asked Gabe.
“Who?”
“Fionnuala.”
“Oh. Is she? I didn’t know. I’m being kept out of the loop it seems.” He looked at me, and his eyes appeared bloodshot, which seemed impossible for a mask-wearing angel. “How do you know she’s back?”
“Phoenix told me.”
Finn dropped a glass, and it shattered all over the floor.
Gabe shook his head and got to his feet. “I need to work. I’ll contact you if I have any news.”
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Your people are safe, aren’t they?”
“That’s not what—”
“Of course it is. All I have to tell you is that Esther’s Circle have been here pestering me. They want to speak to Esther, to persuade her to return to the fold.”
“Really?”
“I need to be alone, Ava. If you haven’t got anything important to say, then please leave.”
“What’s with you?”
“I’m tired. I have to work. I can’t do anything for you today. I can’t do anything for anyone.” He slipped into the back room, slamming the door after him.
I turned back to Finn, who had just finished cleaning up the glass. “What’s going on?”
“We’ve been having trouble,” he said. “It’s supposed to be a neutral place, but there have been arguments. Violence. Attacks, really. He’s been called a traitor. Worse things, too.”
“Why? Because of me?”
“Maybe. Or maybe he stood up to the wrong person. He’s been asking the wrong kinds of questions. He knows better than anyone that asking questions can get us killed. But he’s changing. And he’s terrified.”
“What do you mean, changing?”
Finn sighed, leaning his tattooed arms on the counter. He glanced at the backroom door and lowered his voice. “He thinks he’s losing his power, that he’s becoming more human. I’ve never seen him scared before.” He shook his head. “He thinks helping you is healing whatever it is inside him that’s keeping him here. He’s not making any sense, but he’s afraid he’s going to just fade away.”
“But he’s an angel.”
“Yeah, and he’s a fallen one. Need big karma to take that back. He thinks he’s running out of time or something. Or he’s doing the wrong thing. He’s a mess.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
He hesitated. “Maybe you could let him go. Tell him to stop helping or something. I’ve never seen him like this, and I don’t like it. It makes my skin crawl to hear him talk, the things he’s been saying. Leave him out of your battles.”
I frowned, sitting there and staring into space as Finn went about his business. What Finn was saying had to be bullshit. An angel couldn’t become human or fade away. That wasn’t possible.
“What’s he like?” Finn asked, disturbing my thoughts.
“What? Who?”
“Phoenix.” He said the name reverently, his eyes full of awe.
“You know of him?”
He grinned. “He was practically my idol, the young royal doing whatever he wanted.”
“Some kind of playboy fae?” I asked, trying not to laugh.
He wiped down the counter. “Not exactly. The fae had some tough years. We barely managed to keep a hold of our place on the Council at one stage. Everything changed when Fionnuala married the great warrior Conn.”
“Is marriage that important to the fae?”
“The right one is. Her family were powerful but unpopular, and Conn was a real hero to many of us. Phoenix looked like him, and a lot of us saw it as a sign. Phoenix didn’t seem as uptight as his mother.”
“Where’s Conn now?”
He sagged against the counter. “Everything went wrong. We heard Conn was sick and a witch had cured him, but he died soon after, apparently from a festering wound. Not long after that, Phoenix disappeared. The rumours whispered that Phoenix had died, too. Then, there was talk of Fionnuala losing her seat if she didn’t have an heir. And up Phoenix pops, walking werewolves around like puppies.”
“Didn’t anyone question what happened to him?”
He blinked. “You don’t question the boss, Red. Besides, he’s back, and he’s going to marry a member of the British Committee. He might restore the faith a little.” His eyes tightened. “Like I said, we’ve had some tough years. Is he a leader?”
“He’s like an angel of death on the battlefield,” I said, smiling as Finn’s eyes widened with hope. “Whatever you’ve heard about him, multiply it by ten. Between him and the werewolves… I wouldn’t want to make an enemy of them.”
“It’s a relief to know the son is alive and a warrior like his father. That makes us more secure. If Fionnuala had died or been dethroned, there would have been a civil war determining who was next in line.”
“If Phoenix wasn’t full-blooded fae, if his father had been human, would he still be in charge?”
Finn choked out a laugh. “Absolutely not. We are pure, and only the pure are fit to rule us.” His face hardened, the seriousness of his race overruling the light-heartedness of his nature.
“I’m going to speak to Gabe,” I said. I didn’t like being around Finn when he acted that way. I hated to think that all of his race would judge the twins because their mother had been a human witch, despite their father being fae royalty. It didn’t seem fair.
I entered Gabe’s office without knocking. He sat behind his desk, staring into space. He flinched when he noticed me approach, and I shrugged.
“I can’t leave it alone,” I said. “I hear you’ve been having trouble.”
“Finn,” he muttered. “Always with the gossip. You would think he was human, the way he harps on so.”
“If you’re backing out, do it now. Neither of us can afford things to get messy.”
“I never said I was backing out!” he barked.
“I know. But maybe you need to.”
He glared at me. “What has Finn been saying?”
“That you think you’re losing your power maybe. That maybe there’s something bigger going on with you.”
He made a disgusted sound. “Finn talks a lot. You don’t usually listen. Why start now?”
“Fionnuala’s back. Things are going to get serious. We both know that. If you aren’t ready, if you can’t hack it, then you’re free to walk away.”
He frowned. “You would let me walk away. Just like that. No repercussions. Nothing to fear?”
“You saved my life,” I said softly. “I think we’re even by now. And you can’t be honest with me. It doesn’t make for a good working relationship.”
He gazed around the room. “Before you came along, this made me happy. Working here, running the bar. More than being a part of the Council. It takes a lot of ego to be in charge, a huge amount of ego to believe you know what’s best for a large group of people. Most of the time I’m sitting in that Council chair, I’m thinking of this room, of being here instead.”
“So… do this then?
”
“I can’t,” he hissed. “I’m supposed to atone. How is working in a bar atoning? How am I supposed to…? Maybe I’ve already gone wrong. Maybe everything I’ve done has been the wrong step. How am I supposed to tell?”
He seemed to be talking to himself rather than me, and I could see he was unravelling.
“Gabe, what’s going on?” I asked, a little afraid. “You’re freaking me out.”
“I’m freaking myself out.” He stood abruptly and came around the desk to clutch my upper arms. “Are you leading me in the wrong direction?” he asked, shaking me. “Are you the mistake? Has this all been a test?”
“I have no fucking clue,” I whispered.
He let me go. “Just get out. I told you, I have work to do.”
I left, exchanging a knowing glance with Finn as I left the bar. I walked down the road, counting heartbeats in my despair. Gabe was losing his mind. That was the only explanation I had for it. And I was relying on him to help me, too. We were a team of broken soldiers with broken minds. How did I ever imagine we could win?
“Ava!” Gabe called.
I paused to let him catch up. He stopped in front of me, his mask a little more secure than before.
“Forget something?” I asked.
He held up his phone. “I got a call. You can come with me.”
My stomach churned. “Where?”
“There’s been an attack on a business in town. Guardians and the gardaí have both been called in, and I told Shay we would help bridge the two. There have been some difficulties over dividing responsibilities between them.”
“Who attacked the business?” I asked, automatically thinking of shadows and tattooed assassins.
He looked as though he couldn’t believe what he was about to say. “Humans.”
Chapter Six
“I can’t believe you’re taking me to a brothel,” I teased as Gabe parked behind a paddy wagon. I was just glad to see he had pulled himself out of whatever pit of depression fallen angels tended to land in.
“It’s not my fault the humans took it upon themselves to go vigilante on the succubi.”