JUNE 20
When things were going too well, it was time to self-destruct again. Finally close friends and my wife urged me to complete a checklist that I often used with clients during their assessment for treatment. I did it to prove everyone wrong, but even with my background as a professional I was unprepared for my memories of sexual molestation. As my past began to unravel, there were times I wanted to deny it, but everywhere I turned my memories were being confirmed for me. I am not alone as a male survivor, but if it were not for my faith in God and my wife’s faith in me, I would have given up. My life has started to make sense.
Stuart Brantley
He that will not apply new remedies must expect new evils, for time is the greatest innovator.
Francis Bacon
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 21
While in the process of “coming to believe,” I realized that I had the wrong perspective about money. My money, as all things, belongs to my Higher Power. I am merely the agent responsible enough to see that it reaches its proper destination.
Sala Dayo
If money is all that a man makes, then he will be poor–poor in happiness, poor in all that makes life worth living.
Herbert N. Casson
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 22
There is no need to prove the truth. Trying to do so shows only your own stubbornness. Truth will always reveal itself at the right moment and the right place. You need be concerned only with living true to your own self. Judge whether your thoughts, words or actions are beneficial to the scene in which you find yourself. Focusing on your own part is more useful than passing judgment on others.
Brahma Kumaris
World Spiritual University
By constantly remaining obedient to your sense of integrity, certain success obeys your every move.
Brahma Kumaris
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 23
Set your roots down deep and drink from refreshing streams as you dine on the sustenance provided by the One who gives you life. Nourish yourself with words, values and relationships that will uphold you during the storms of life. Make right choices to move forward, leaving behind the floods and droughts of the past. Enjoy the refreshing rain of forgiveness as it washes away the dirt from each day. Sway with gentle breezes, bend with fierce winds, and reach to the highest heights as you bask in the warmth of the sun.
Ava Pennington
Life is simplified when there is one center, one reason, one motivation, one direction and purpose.
Jean Fleming
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 24
To “live in the moment” means to breathe the fragrance of Heaven, to stop and listen to the cry of need, to step out in faith and love bringing God’s provision, to not miss it all because I’m too busy running to the next moment.
Karen Hall
We have stopped for a moment to encounter each other. To meet, to love, to share. It is a precious moment, but it is transient. It is a little parentheses in eternity.
Deepak Chopra, M.D.
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 25
Loved ones of a suicide often blame themselves, but I don’t. I know the choices my husband made in his life were his choices, not mine. Because of my faith in a loving, merciful God and because I have experienced many difficult trials in my life, I have learned how to survive and choose to survive well. I am fully alive and I believe my late husband is also. He was a man who loved his family and who is no longer burdened by a disease that had him in its awful grip. I take one day at a time, enjoy the rain and the sun, endure the ice and the freezing winds— and feel peace.
Ann Best
The only useless endeavor is to resist the command knit into our very souls, move. Move on.
Unknown
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 26
We play a variety of roles in life, but we should not depend on roles to define ourselves. A role always involves someone else’s needs, expectations and agendas, which may have little to do with our own. The power of a role lies in its “possessive other”: parents’ child; children’s parent; boss’s assistant; spouse’s mate. His. Hers. Theirs.We must sometimes put the word “my” into that place of possessive power. “I am my . . . what?” What role do I play for me? Having no answer for that makes us as dependent as the sound of that old, proverbial tree falling in the forest—if there’s no one around to hear us, our very existence becomes questionable.
Maribeth Pittman
To know what you prefer instead of what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to keep your soul alive.
Robert Louis Stevenson
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 27
Many years ago, while in detox, helpless and hopeless, I came to know the real meaning of true love–one drunk looking after another drunk. It was there that I learned that if I took certain simple steps, my life would improve in ways that I could not then imagine. These promises have become my reality.
Sobriety subtly makes itself manifest in my spirit. It is as though I have been given the chance to relive part of my life again. Only in retrospect does each year become gentler than the year before and the change is as inconspicuous as the beating of my heart.
Peter Wright
Man improves himself as he follows his path; if he stands still, waiting to improve before he makes a decision, he’ll never move.
Paulo Coelho
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 28
While riding to a weekend recovery convention, my children heard theword “crackpot” on the radio and began incessantly joking, “You crackpot!” I focused onfeeling the presence ofmyHigher Power and being grateful for the kids. The breakup of a relationship bore heavily on me and one of my intentions that weekend was to process my emotional pain after the loss of my dream romance. In a serendipitous moment, the finalworkshop speaker told a Zen story of blooming that resulted from water dripping from an imperfect “cracked pot.” The “God-incidence” of hearing those uncommon words again tickled my soul. I headed home with a mending heart,mindful of the joy recovery brings tomy life.
Pamela Knight
Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
Unknown
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 29
As I gain an understanding about food and it no longer controls me, a sense of power arises. I replace eating for other non-injurious pleasures: new activities, new friendships, rediscovering creativity.
My ability to distinguish physical hunger from emotional hunger grows and this growth makes it less possible to fool myself that filling up my stomach fills up my heart.
Donna LeBlanc
Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterward.
Vernon Law
Footnotes for Life
JUNE 30
Behind the giggles, eight-year-old Amanda struggled with her mother’s steady descent into the abyss of alcoholism. Although they were separated, Amanda’s dad respected the deep bond she had for her mother. He encouraged Amanda to understand and cope with the family’s circumstances. She quickly learned she was not alone, that millions of other kids love parents challenged by alcoholism and other drug addiction. She was relieved to know she didn’t make her mother drink and more importantly, couldn’t make her stop. With Dad’s loving act and his extraordinary commitment he gave his little girl the gift he himself had been denied as a child–a safe place to grow, learn and heal.
Jerry Moe
If they drop the atom bomb, if I want to have a chance at survival, I want to be with a bunch of ACoAs.
Cathleen Brooks
Footnotes for Life
JULY 1
When we call something by its right name, we have stopped pretending. We are facing the truth, refusing to dress up what we see. It is then that life is put in perspective, and we begin to understand.
&
nbsp; Only after we call things by their right names do we have the privilege of renaming them.
Barbara A. Croce
The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names.
Traditional Chinese Proverb
Footnotes for Life
JULY 2
May all your days be blessed with someone who cares for you, accepts you and your flaws, who will watch over you and protect you. Someone who will encourage you to believe in life and in your wishes and dreams, who will give you strength and guidance and care for you throughout eternity.
Stacey Chillemi
The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.
Carl Rogers
Footnotes for Life
JULY 3
As you do, so you become. Every action that you perform is recording in you, the soul. These imprints ultimately mold your character and destiny. When you understand this principle, you will pay more attention to bringing your best to everything you do. React less; respond more. As you learn to tell yourmind what to do, old ways of thinking and doing will change.
Brahma Kumaris
World Spiritual University
Whenever life throws you a curve ball, remember this is all just a game.
Brahma Kumaris
Footnotes for Life
JULY 4
Whispers solve a lot of problems. You can’t argue in a whisper. You have to listen carefully to hear a whisper. “Whispers” in the night make everything right. What seemed so gigantic in the brightness of the day loses its significance in the security of a whisper. How do I know? In fifty-seven years of marriage, my husband’s whispers in the wee hours of the morning have brought a lifetime of “I love you’s.” Love lies behind a whisper. Love always triumphs. Love wins over all. The next misunderstanding can end with a whisper. Whisper today. It works every time.
Joan Clayton
Before you speak, ask yourself, is it kind, is it necessary, is it true, does it improve on the silence?
Sai Baba
Footnotes for Life
JULY 5
Ida was the cleaning lady. I was the new admission. As she worked, she asked why I was there. “I lost my wedding band and my sanity last week. I’m trying to calm down,” I explained.“You should talk to St. Anthony. He finds things when you ask,” she offered kindly. The next day she persisted, obviously serious about this saint thing. Unfamiliar with saints, prayer, even dumb luck, I wrote St. Anthony a poem. Days later while cleaning the garage my husband walked inside with shaking hands–and my ring. “It fell out of an empty six-pack container,” he said. I don’t know if St. Anthony was impressed with my poetry, but I knew Ida believed and had lent me both her belief and her favorite saint.
Carol J.Bonomo
We are each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another.
Luciano de Crescenzo
Footnotes for Life
JULY 6
Recovering from an illness or from some dreaded disease of the heart or mind–from alcoholism, drug addiction or abuse—can scar us but they cannot destroy our spirit, not if we refuse to allow it. It takes great courage to believe that we can overcome. There is a certain bravery in facing up to our own weaknesses, to our own mortality, to all of the possibilities that might be visited upon us. Life is what it’s all about. Life is taking a stand with someone, loving through the hardships, encouraging the defeated, teaching the young. And in the simple touch of a hand or a warm embrace we heal each other, one person at a time.
Todd Outcalt
Find a purpose in life so big it will challenge every capacity to be at your best.
David O. McKay
Footnotes for Life
JULY 7
Growing up, my husband’s house was “party central.” It was so bad his neighbors nicknamed his cul-de-sac “alcoholic’s circle.” The first time Rich brought me home to meet Mom, she was so drunk she was sliding out of the chair and spoke with slurred speech. I was shocked. Later he calmly explained, “Didn’t I tell you? My mom’s a party girl.” He could have said she was a drunk or a loser, but he didn’t. He accepted her for who she was. When people complain about their alcoholic I tell them what I learned from my husband, “Quit trying to change them and try some compassion. Life is a lotmore peaceful that way.”
Carla Riehl
As I surrendered my imaginary power over others, I gained a more realistic view of my own life.
Al-Anon World Service
Footnotes for Life
JULY 8
The more I learn the more I know that I do not understand. Life is full of new and wonderful information; paradoxes and confusion abound; every new idea leads to a further truth and the journey seems endless.
In a sense we are all disciples; we are all learning from each other and the role of teacher and student is forever being exchanged. In my sobriety I am able to see how many wonderful “things” exist in the world; so many fascinating and interesting places to visit, so many loving and insightful people.
God has given me much. I am so grateful to be able to learn in His garden.
To teach is to learn.
Japanese Proverb
Reverend Leo Booth
Footnotes for Life
JULY 9
My graduation dress made a surprise appearance from the back of my closet last spring. I heard the faint rattle of bones as the skeleton I had zipped into the folds of yellow chiffon was suddenly released. I had never admitted to anyone that I was bulimic; not my teenage daughters, nor my mother, who died never knowing my secret. As I eyed the soft fabric in my lap I realized that eating disorders never disappear, they simply shuffle themselves to the backs of closets and lurk. Now that the skeleton is out ofmy closet, I hope I can learn to accept the teenager who wore that dress and forgive her the dark secret she’s been hiding.
Elva Stoelers
Truth has a healing effect, even when not fully understood.
Mary Baker Eddy
Footnotes for Life
JULY 10
Through the years, I have channeled my anger in many ways . . . in order not to face it. I have used competence as a weapon, exercising my power by becoming a taskmaster. I have vented my anger by using chemicals or food, abusing myself and others by my erratic, destructive behavior. I was led to believe that if I cut myself off from my rage, it would go away. Today I know that it is precisely from cutting myself off from my emotions that I lack skills in resolving them. I am learning how to turn to others for assistance and support to resolve my emotions without letting my anger run my life.
Rokelle Lerner
The fly cannot be driven away by getting angry at it.
African Proverb
Footnotes for Life
JULY 11
It calls to me, like an angry father calling a child. I don’t want to go, but feel powerless to resist. It is an addiction, my addiction. It’s in my blood and clouds my judgment, but not my heart.
This is my struggle, my fight, and I will win. Alcoholism may wage a war, but it will not take me prisoner.We are not alone in this battle. Together we will find the strength to overcome an enemy that does not like to be ignored. Day by day, one step at a time.
Raquel Strand
Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for; it is a thing to be achieved.
William Jennings Bryan
Footnotes for Life
JULY 12
Finding myself in prison was both the worst and the best thing that ever happened to me. I was nothing but a number to the prison system, but Carla, my counselor in the court-ordered drug program, always treated me with respect and dignity. When I finally walked out of prison I was convinced I would put that part of my life completely out of my mind. It hasn’t quite worked out that way. In my day-to-day living when I get a little shaky in my recovery I still hear Carla’s warm voice telling me, “I am so pro
ud of you, you’ve earned this,” or feel her hug, as loving as if she were my own mother. You can find angels everywhere.