‘You’ll always be that,’ Cal said.
Thiede glanced back at Velaxis and flared his nostrils. ‘Anyway, the time has come for me to depart this gathering and speak alone with my faithful servant.’
Velaxis bowed. ‘Of course, tiahaar.’ He allowed Thiede to steer him from the room.
Now that Darquiel had delivered his report, and the atmosphere in the room was lighter following Thiede’s departure, Tava-edzen sent a message to Jezinki to bring food and ale. Darq felt obliged to approach Ookami, who was still clearly angry. ‘I’m sorry,’ Darq said, wondering whether this particular spell of words would work; somehow he doubted it.
Ookami did not speak and would not even look at Darq.
‘You’ve done so much for me,’ Darq pressed on. ‘I’m grateful. I don’t condone what Velaxis did to you, but in his own way he was important to me.’
‘I understand,’ Ookami said. ‘My part in your life was brief. The moment we came here it ended.’
‘No,’ Darq said. ‘That’s not right. You mean a lot to me.’
‘Some things you just have to accept,’ Ookami said. ‘We all do. Will you excuse me?’
Without waiting for a reply, Ookami left the room. Darq wasn’t quite sure what the har had meant. He turned to face the room and noticed that Cal was studying Tava-edzen intently, in the manner of a cat watching potential prey. Darq wasn’t surprised when his father moved swiftly and took Tava-edzen to one side. Darq decided he had to be part of any ensuing conversation; he went quickly to join them.
Cal gave his son a stare, then clearly decided it would be pointless to ask him to move away. ‘Well, well, Manticker is still among the living,’ Cal said to Tava-edzen. ‘You’ve hardly changed physically. Not that I knew you way back when, really.’
‘I remember you,’ Tava-edzen said. ‘Weren’t you the one that Wraxilan lost his reason over?’
Cal shrugged. ‘Most likely.’
Tava-edzen eyed Cal shrewdly. ‘He took it upon himself to destroy me round about the same time.’
‘I met him again some time ago,’ Cal said hastily, clearly attempting to divert the conversation a little. ‘In Maudrah.’
‘Oh.’ Tava-edzen raised his eyebrows. ‘And?’
‘In some ways the same, in others greatly changed. He’s done well for himself.’
‘I heard.’
‘But then so have you, if not on such a grand scale.’ Cal’s tone changed, losing some of its levity. ‘I hope you’ll consider bringing Nezreka into the Federation of Tribes, tiahaar. Darquiel has spoken well of you.’
‘Thank you for the offer,’ Tava-edzen said stonily, ‘but it’s not appropriate for us. We keep to ourselves out here.’
Cal inclined his head. ‘I appreciate that, and we’d not require you to change anything. However, it might be useful for you to be kept apprised of current events. There would be other benefits too. I’m sure you don’t need me to spell it all out, at this time.’
Tava-edzen grimaced. ‘You want to shepherd us into the fold,’ he said, ‘but we’re quite happy roaming out on the hillside.’
‘As you wish, but I hope some kind of relations can be maintained.’
‘You can be sure of that,’ Tava-edzen said. He glanced at Darquiel and smiled.
Darquiel sensed that Cal wouldn’t let it rest at that, but his father did not mention the subject again that evening. Cal dropped into the role of ambassador and politician, and took care to speak to everyhar who had been part of Darquiel’s life.
Very late at night, Darquiel managed to get some more private moments with Cal. Tava-edzen had invited the high-ranking hara of Nezreka to the Drudehall, and now there was a party atmosphere within it. Everyhar had moved to the room where the Natalia rite had been held and the wine and ale were flowing freely. Cal and Darq went out into the yard beyond Tava-edzen’s office and there sat muffled in thick furs on an ice-covered wooden bench, their breath clouding on the air.
‘I’ve become utterly Gelaming,’ Cal said, somewhat despairingly. ‘It’s my instinct now to organise and facilitate. I’m considering offering Ookami a position in Immanion, because he’d no doubt refuse. I admire what he’s done for you, though. He’s a good har.’
‘He is, and I would like to keep him as an advisor.’ Darq grimaced. ‘He’s furious about Velaxis, of course. But once he’s cooled down a little, I hope that if I ask him to stay with me, he’d be less likely to refuse than if you asked him.’
Cal laughed. ‘Ah, now our blood speaks through you! Have you mentioned anything about this potential position to him?’
Darq shook his head. ‘No. A lot has changed over the course of one day, and I haven’t had a chance. At the moment, he’s angry and disappointed in me. But I will ask him when the time feels right.’
‘And Tava-edzen…’
Darq glanced furtively at his father. ‘What about him? Do you disapprove of the age difference?’
Cal stuck out his lower lip. ‘No, not at all. Why should I? I can see how you feel for one another. I just wonder what you can do to bring him onto the stage, as it were. Manticker was a respected leader. If he hadn’t been ousted by Wraxilan, it’s possible Ponclast wouldn’t have ended up with so much power.’
Darq pulled his fur coat more tightly around his body. ‘Manticker might have ended up like Ponclast. Tava is scathing of his early days. He thinks what happened to him was for the best.’
Cal raised an eyebrow. ‘Well, Wraxilan turned out fine.’
‘What does it matter? The past can’t be changed.’
Cal reached out and pushed a stray strand of Darq’s hair away from his eyes. ‘No, it can’t, but the future can. Having met your Tava, I think his voice should be heard.’
‘Maybe he’ll feel differently when he knows you better.’
Cal twisted his mouth to the side. ‘Maybe. Gelaming do tend to throw their weight around. I even feel myself doing it, as I told you.’
Darq sighed. ‘I’m more worried about my brother, Loki. I don’t want to have to fight him.’
‘I’m sure it won’t come to that,’ Cal said. ‘Not if I’ve got anything to do with it, anyway.’
The following day, Darq began to acquire the instruction he craved, concerning otherlanes travel. It appeared that Cal had decided to forgive Velaxis, because they agreed to work together with Darq, and Thiede had obviously given his permission. Ookami, pointedly, kept well away. Darq felt slightly guilty that he spent so much time with Cal and Velaxis, thereby sidelining the Ikutama, who had been his protector for so long. At one time, Ookami had virtually been the center of Darq’s life and he’d believed they’d somehow end up together, at least for a short time, but fate had decreed things turned out differently. Darq thought that perhaps hara swam into focus and faded away all the time throughout life. He hoped a time would come when he could talk to Ookami about it, and explain how he felt, but for now all he could and did care about was his training. Tava-edzen provided a large empty room near the top of the Drudehall, which he said he occasionally used for meetings and ritual. It had a wall of windows that looked out over the town and pale winter sunlight streamed into it.
Although Cal and Velaxis regularly had differences of opinion, Darq could see they liked and respected one another. One day, he intended to get Velaxis’ full story. Darq had to admit that Velaxis had taken a lot of liberties with him, but he couldn’t find it within himself to be angry about it. It hadn’t done him any harm, and in fact had been quite an adventure, even if at the beginning he’d been resentful of Zu’s intimate meddlings. He found it difficult now to equate this fairly urbane creature with the mysterious entity that had haunted his journey east. Velaxis was theatrical; he liked playing a mystifying role. But he couldn’t keep that up in front of those who knew him well.
Unlike Loki, Darq was confident with the procedure of opening portals and traveling through them. He became proficient at it far more quickly. Once he knew how to do it, he was surprised he hadn
’t discovered it by accident before. He could travel both physically and astrally, and over the next few days experimented with otherlanes journeys, both with and without his physical body.
Despite Cal’s constant requests, Velaxis was insistent that Loki could not be prized from the grip of the Aasp, or more accurately their agents, the Hashmallim. Darquiel, heady with success, felt he was more than competent enough to try and breach the barriers around Thanatep. Both Velaxis and Cal were adamant he should not attempt it.
‘The Aasp failed to kill you once,’ Velaxis said. ‘Don’t be so foolish as to go wandering alone into a realm they control. I doubt they’d fail if they got another opportunity to get rid of you.’
‘Why don’t they just come here and do it, then?’ Darq said. ‘I’m not in hiding any more. I don’t think they’re as powerful as you say.’
‘Darq, you must wait,’ Cal said.
Darq blew out his cheeks. ‘Why? So they can poison Loki against me even more? Has it occurred to you that he might be the tool they could use to destroy me?’
It obviously had occurred to Cal, who appeared pained. ‘We’ll return to Immanion soon, and talk things over with Pell.’
‘Immanion is full of sedim,’ Darq said. ‘I wonder whether I should go there yet. I’m surprised Lurlei hasn’t turned up again here, to be honest.’ He frowned. ‘I accept your counsel, but I’ll have to decide myself what I should do next.’
‘By Aru,’ Cal exclaimed, ‘there’s a lot of Pell in you! Don’t you think so, Vel?’
‘Indeed, there is,’ Velaxis said, grinning.
‘What do you mean?’ Darq asked.
‘Never mind,’ Cal said. ‘We should break for the day now. I’m hungry. Don’t we have another formal feast to attend this evening?’
Left alone, Darq went to his room and was pleased to find Ookami wasn’t there. He had at least an hour of spare time before dinner, and although he didn’t really intend to try and visit Thanatep, he thought he could do a bit of sniffing round. He could try to discover where its boundaries were, at least, and he could remain alert for otherlanes signatures that resembled his own. Part of him yearned to present Loki triumphantly to the older hara, but he wasn’t stupid, and knew it would be folly to take senseless risks. Still, nosing around wouldn’t hurt.
Darq composed himself cross-legged on the floor beneath the window, and decided he’d project his consciousness into the otherlanes rather than visit them physically. He presumed this was a safer option. Like Loki, he could control the appearance of the otherlanes, but had far longer sight than his brother did within them. He could visualise them as an immense shining web, upon which nodules of different colored lights represented potential exit points to other realms. Cal had already taught Darq how to recognise the signature that represented the physical and psychic makeup of a member of his family. He extended his sight to search for such signs, not really in the hope he’d find anything. Therefore, it was a surprise when he stumbled upon an energy signature that was as familiar to him as his own being. He found it in a small realm, the security for which was not that intense. He did wonder about this. Surely, if Loki was there, he’d have more protection? Still, Darq’s excitement at his discovery overrode any caution and he formed a portal to exit the otherlanes.
Beyond the portal, Darq found a young har who looked so much like Cal it had to be Loki. His essence also felt familiar. But it was clear at once that Loki did not perceive Darq’s true form. Darq could see himself through Loki’s eyes: a manifestation of aggressive energy. He could tell that Loki’s indoctrination, some of which was subtler than he knew, had taken over. His purpose for being, carefully groomed by the Aasp, swung into action.
Darquiel was confronted by a murderously hostile force and he could do nothing but react defensively. In the moments before they made contact, he tried to communicate with Loki, but there were barriers in place he could not breach. Their conflict began to destroy the fabric of the realm, which was not that stable. Then there were strange forces shooting in from all sides, and everything became utterly confused. When the sedu appeared, Darquiel fled. He was disorientated and shaken; it was extremely difficult for him to return to his home realm. When eventually he pulled his consciousness back into earthly reality, he lay exhausted and trembling upon his bedroom floor. Then he wept. He had to admit he was not as strong or as clever as he’d thought.
Velaxis found him in that state. He came into the room and said, ‘I felt something was distressing you, I had to come. What have you done?’
Darq raised his head. He was incapable of speech.
Velaxis came to kneel beside him and placed a hand on Darq’s back. ‘Where have you been?’ he asked. ‘I know you’ve been somewhere. What happened?’
Darq could only shake his head. Velaxis sighed through his nose, stood up and went to the bathroom. He returned carrying a glass of water, which Darq accepted gratefully. He drank it all, and wiped his mouth.
‘Better?’ Velaxis asked.
Darq nodded and put the glass down on the floor. ‘I found Loki,’ he said.
Velaxis raised his eyebrows. ‘What? You’d better explain.’
Darq told him all that had happened. ‘I didn’t expect to find him. I wasn’t prepared.’
‘You were warned,’ Velaxis said. ‘Darq, don’t do that again. It’s just not safe.’
‘Loki hates me,’ Darq said. He closed his eyes. ‘It’s such an unreasoning and mindless hatred.’ He stared at Velaxis. ‘We have to get into Thanatep. Before it’s too late.’
‘It might already be too late,’ Velaxis said softly.
Darq felt emotion welling within him and decided to let it spill out. He wept again. To come face to face with such unjustified loathing as Loki felt for him was shocking. What had he ever done to his brother? It didn’t make sense.
Velaxis made a wordless, soothing sound and hauled Darq into his arms. Together, they sat on the floor, while Darq vented his confusion and bewilderment. Velaxis stroked his hair. ‘We must go to Immanion,’ he said. ‘I agree that we must take action. Thiede told me that Pellaz is also trying to get to Loki. He might already have discovered things of use.’
Darq rested his head on Velaxis’ chest, wiped his eyes with the backs of his hands. ‘Has Cal told Pellaz about me yet, do you know?’
‘I don’t think so. Everything’s been so hectic. You have to prepare yourself for Pellaz, Darq. He’s a mighty force.’
‘I like Cal,’ Darq said. ‘That’s a relief.’
‘He’s not a typical Gelaming,’ Velaxis said dryly.
‘Neither are you,’ Darq said. He hesitated. ‘Was your name once really Zu?’
Velaxis laughed softly. ‘Bizarrely enough, yes. I supposed you’d picked that up from me.’
‘Maybe I did. I think I met family of yours in Helek Sah. A man called Nimron.’
Velaxis rested his chin on the top of Darq’s head. ‘My father,’ he said. ‘I knew he was still alive.’
‘Why don’t you go to him?’
Velaxis sighed, deep in his chest. ‘If you want the truth, it’s because I can’t bear to see what’s become of my people. I have to put it behind me. But that doesn’t mean I can’t fight for them out here in the world.’
‘I think you should go,’ Darq said. ‘I’ll go with you, if you want me to. When all this is over.’
Velaxis was quiet for some moments, and then said, ‘Darq, do you resent what I did to you?’
Darq pulled away from him. ‘No. I was annoyed at first, but you ended up being a kind of lifeline for me. I’m pleased we can be together like hara now, in a normal way. I prefer it. Was Thiede angry with you?’
‘Impatient,’ Velaxis said. ‘He thinks I should have kept him informed, and maybe I should have done.’ He smiled wryly. ‘The fact is that I wanted to communicate with you alone. I spend so much time paying lip service to other hara’s needs and demands. I have to act continually in Immanion, playing whatever roles are required o
f me or are appropriate. With you, I lived out a kind of fantasy. I enjoyed it. You were my private escape.’
‘Despite our strange beginnings, I look on you as a friend,’ Darq said. ‘That won’t change.’
Velaxis inclined his head. ‘Thank you.’ He frowned. ‘Pellaz will be furious with me. We don’t exactly get on. It’s fortunate that Cal and I do, because otherwise Pellaz would gladly use my behavior with you as an excuse to get me out of the Hegalion. I’m your hostling’s best friend, though. You’ll like Rue. He’s easy to be with.’
‘A lot of hara to meet,’ Darq said. ‘I’m not looking forward to it. I can’t do what you do, Vel; pay lip service. I’m bound to say all sorts of things that I shouldn’t.’
‘Just be yourself,’ Velaxis said. ‘Remember, the Aralisians thought they’d lost you. They want you to return.’
‘It’s not so much my family I’m worried about,’ Darq said, ‘but everyhar else. They’ll think I’m a freak, or too full of myself because of what I can do… or something. Anyway, I’m just not looking forward to it.’
Velaxis kissed the top of his head. ‘Don’t worry. You have Thiede and Cal behind you, and you have me. It won’t be as bad as you think.’
Darq rested his head on Velaxis’ chest once more and closed his eyes. He hoped Velaxis wasn’t just humoring him. He wished Tava-edzen would be with him, but knew that would never happen. Soon they would spend their last night together, if not for a long time, then perhaps forever.
Chapter Thirty
Early one morning, five days after Cal had come to Nezreka, Darquiel har Aralis left the realm of snow and wolf magic and emerged from the otherlanes with Thiede, Cal and Velaxis into the far more balmy winter season of Almagabra. Darq had spent his last night alone with Tava-edzen. Their parting in the morning had been brief yet poignant. All Tava-edzen had said was, ‘Come to me when you can.’
Darq resolved he’d keep away from Nezreka until he felt events had come to a proper conclusion. His reward for whatever tasks lay in the future for him would be to lie once more in Tava-edzen’s arms.