Morgan jumped up from the table. “But he left me alone! He didn’t even know about Adam. I should think that would be sufficient reason for a divorce!”
“Ah, yes… Adam is another problem. Before he was born, a divorce would have been a lot simpler. Now, of course, there is the possibility that the courts would award Adam to his father.”
Her mind went blank. She sat down again. “What do you mean?” Her voice was harsh.
“Well, I briefly told Mr. Bradley about your troubles in San Francisco. I assured him that you were totally innocent, but he said that no matter what the truth of the matter was, your stay at Madame Nicole’s would look very bad on paper. And later, you lived with an unmarried man—Theron. It all looks bad.”
“But none of that was my fault!”
“That wouldn’t really matter. Seth’s lawyer could use those facts to tarnish your character.”
Morgan sat quietly, her hands folded in her lap. She couldn’t even imagine losing Adam.
“There is a way.”
“How?”
“If we found Seth and persuaded him to waive all rights to his son.”
Morgan felt helpless, defeated. “He’d never do that,” she whispered.
“How do you know? We’d have to find him and ask him.”
She stood up. “Please excuse me, Gordon, I’m not very hungry this morning.” How do I know? I know because Seth loves his son very much and he would never give him up. Never.
Gordon smiled. He really shouldn’t have lied that way. Not lied, really … but bent the truth. Mr. Bradley had said all those things, but had added that there were ways of getting around the situation. Gordon had simply neglected to mention them to Morgan. It was for her own good, though. Someone had to stop her from ruining her life.
“Well, Adam, shall we go ride a horse?”
Adam grinned, showing little white teeth. “Ride horse.”
“Very good. A few more days and you’ll be able to argue with your mother.”
Morgan spent the morning helping Roselle in the kitchen. After lunch, she went to Gordon’s study to work on the household accounts. She tried a hundred times to make the horizontal row of numbers match the vertical row.
“Mama.”
She looked up to see Adam running to her, arms outstretched. She was glad for the excuse to leave the hated numbers. “What happened to the pink-and-white cherub who left here this morning? I think this boy must have lived all his life with coyotes. Do you have a kiss for your mama?”
Morgan looked up to see Seth’s large form smiling down on them. “I brought him back. He needs a nap in the afternoon. It’s too tiring for him to ride in the sun all day.”
She began to inform him that she was perfectly capable of caring for her own son, but choked back the angry words. “That’s very thoughtful of you.” She looked down at Adam’s head. He was sitting in her lap, his back to her. He was perfectly still, a sure sign that he was tired. She shifted him to one side in preparation for lifting him.
In one stride, Seth was across the few feet separating them. He took Adam in his arms. His hand brushed her breast. It was as if a torch had touched her. Seth looked into her eyes, but she turned away quickly, hiding her reaction.
“If you’ll show me where his room is, I’ll put him in bed for you.”
“I’ll…” She saw in his eyes that he’d have his way. “Follow me.”
“With pleasure.” His eyes were on the sway of her skirts as they went upstairs. She felt the blood rush to her cheeks again.
“Just put him here on the cot. I need to undress him before I put him in bed.”
Seth carefully deposited the sleepy Adam on the cot, and began unbuttoning his shirt.
Morgan started to intercede, but he brushed her aside. “I want to. I don’t get to spend much time with him, and I want to, whenever I can.”
Morgan stood back and watched as Seth awkwardly removed Adam’s shirt. It was funny to see the rugged little body treated as if it were eggshells. Adam, for some reason of his own, decided not to bend his arm. Seth worked for several minutes with no result. Adam’s eyes were half closed, but she knew he was very much awake and enjoying his father’s increasing frustration.
A giggle finally escaped her.
Seth whirled on her. “What’s so funny?” he demanded.
“You. You act like he’s a piece of handblown crystal. I assure you he is very strong. I could show you bruises he’s made on me—” She stopped because Seth’s eyes were twinkling.
“I’d like that.”
“Like what?”
“To see your bruises.”
She looked away and stepped in front of Seth to tend her son. Adam’s eyes opened wide. “Yes, you little imp, you know I won’t put up with your nonsense. Now let’s get out of these clothes.”
She began to undress Adam quickly, all too aware that Seth had not moved from his place behind her. She could feel his breath on her neck as he leaned nearer to watch.
“Is that how it’s done?” His voice was low and very close.
She turned to answer him. His face was only inches from hers. His eyes were slightly hooded, the lips parted and sensual. Her breathing became more shallow as she saw the strong neck and the blond hair that curled above his open shirt. She knew the look well. She had often fallen into his arms when he had looked at her like that.
“I remember a time when you undressed a larger man.”
With all her strength, she turned back to her son. She did not respond to the thigh that pressed against hers. She turned away from Seth and bent to pick up Adam. Seth moved in front of her and easily picked him up, put him into the bed, covered him, and kissed his forehead. He stared down at Adam for a minute.
“He’s a good-looking boy, isn’t he?”
She could swear Seth puffed his chest out. She looked at him in disgust. Her voice was cutting. “Yes. All the Traherns are handsome people.”
Seth’s eyes teased. “I know one little grandaughter who’s a beauty.”
She glanced away.
Seth looked around the room for the first time, walking to a group of drawings on the wall. He turned startled eyes back to Morgan. “This is you, isn’t it?”
“Yes.”
“But how did they get here? I thought you left New Mexico when you were a baby.”
Morgan explained briefly about the agent her father had hired, and why he had written that preposterous will.
Seth threw his head back and laughed. Adam turned over in his bed but did not waken. Morgan opened the door and they both went into the hall.
“Would you mind telling me why my story is so amusing?” Her voice was hostile.
“Because I thought that will of your father’s was one of the meanest things I’d ever encountered. But he was a sly one. He knew all along about that crazy mother of yours and the way she’d raised you.”
“My mother was not crazy!”
“I shouldn’t have put it that way. I’m sorry.”
“I’ve found that a lot of things my mother taught me were perfectly true.”
“Such as?”
“Men! Men are not to be trusted. They use women. Women are better off without them.”
She didn’t see Seth move, but all at once, she was in his arms. Before she could think, his lips found hers, quietly at first and then searchingly. Her arms went around his strong, hard body, pulling him closer. Her long-withheld passions came to the surface, and she felt she was falling.
Her body acted by itself, pressing her softness against his muscular thighs and hips. Her mouth opened under his and she returned his thrust with an eagerness of her own. Her lips moved with his. His lips sought her neck, traveling down the tendons with little nibbling bites, causing chills along the curve of her spine and on her legs. “I love you, Morgan. I’ve always loved you.”
The words pierced her brain, recalling a time when she had said those words to him. She remembered his sneer. She couldn’t let it happen again. She wasn
’t going to fall in love with him again and be hurt like that. He was not trustworthy. It might happen again.
“No,” she whimpered. “No.”
Somewhere in the back of his mind, Seth heard her protest. He loved her. He could not hurt her, not again. She wasn’t ready yet. He’d gone too fast. He must leave, get away from her, because he wouldn’t be able to contain himself much longer.
He would wait. There’d be another time, a time when she’d welcome him. He held her at arm’s length. Her eyes held passion and rage. He smiled down at her and tenderly kissed her forehead. Her breath was soft and warm, still coming in gasps.
He turned and ran lightly down the stairs. Holding his hat in his hand, he stopped in the doorway and looked back up at her. He grinned at her. “I’m glad you still remember me.”
Morgan stood for a long time, staring at the closed door. Remember him! She wanted to follow him and tell him what a selfish oaf he was, and how conceited. To think his kiss meant anything to her!
She went shakily downstairs to the study to finish balancing the accounts. She sat at the thick pine desk and began adding figures. But after a few minutes she turned and gazed out the window, unseeing. She stayed that way for a long time.
Morgan looked at the clock and realized the entire afternoon had passed. It was nearly time for dinner. Hearing Adam’s squeal from the kitchen, she went to investigate.
Adam sat on a stool at the big work table in the center of the kitchen, shaping pieces of gingerbread.
“Those are the ugliest people I have ever seen. Why do some of them have four eyes?”
“I believe, Mrs. Colter, that some of those eyes are supposed to be ears.”
Morgan tweaked Adam’s ear. “Ears don’t grow beside your nose.”
Adam laughed and pushed her hand away. “Ears.” He put a piece of raw dough in his mouth.
Morgan left the kitchen and went upstairs to change for dinner. Since Adam’s nap had been so late, she decided, he could eat with Gordon and her tonight.
When Morgan entered the dining room some time later, the first thing she saw was Seth’s broad back. He was impeccably dressed in the suit he had worn the night of the party. Morgan felt her anger rise again. She would have to tell Gordon to stop inviting him to dinner so often.
“Oh, Morgan, I hope you don’t mind my inviting Dave to dinner tonight. I’m finding I can learn a lot about ranching from him.”
She had no time to construct an answer before Martin entered, holding Adam’s hand. Adam immediately ran to Seth, his arms outstretched.
“How are you, Adam? I haven’t seen you in hours. Did you have a good nap?”
Adam smiled at his father and pointed to the table. “Eat.”
“This boy certainly knows what he wants.” Seth put Adam on a stool, next to what was fast becoming his own chair. The two sat directly across from Morgan.
“Might I say, Mrs. Colter, that you look especially lovely tonight? Red becomes you.”
“Thank you,” she said tonelessly. She just wouldn’t look at him. She had a brief vision of the beautiful red dress she wore—wore for Seth—at Joaquín’s party. It had disappeared on that horrible night, along with all her dreams.
Morgan stared at her plate as Seth and Gordon talked about the ranch. It seemed even Adam had deserted her. Of course, a mere mother always took second place to food. It infuriated her that Seth cared for the boy so easily. Adam’s plate was never empty, and Seth saw to his needs as if he’d been doing this for years. Adam’s placid acceptance of his father also made her angry. She was being betrayed by the person she loved most in the world.
Morgan was startled when Seth pushed his chair back. “If you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll put my … partner to bed.” His smile was innocent, but she knew what he had wanted to say.
When they were gone, Gordon turned to her. “I’m glad he’s gone, because I want to talk to you about something.”
She opened her mouth to say that she was glad he was gone for any reason, but she closed it again.
“I know there’ll be no problem, but I did want to discuss it with you first. For the good of the ranch, I’d like Dave to move into the house.”
“What?”
“You know that trip I’ve been planning to New York will be soon. I don’t like to leave you and Adam here alone. I’d like to have a man here in the house to protect you.”
“Protect me! Has it ever occurred to you that maybe I need protection from Mr. Blake?”
Gordon was instantly concerned. “Has he ever mistreated you?”
“No, he hasn’t…”
“Good. I thought I knew Dave better than that. Adam, of course, adores him. I just can’t get over the way the child has taken to him, as if…”
“I’ve heard this before. Why do you think it is necessary for Mr. Blake to move into the house?”
“Morgan, I don’t like to bear the entire responsibility for running this ranch. I’m afraid to leave, even to go to Albuquerque. Just when I think I can relax, something happens, like Boyd and the other men quitting to go to the gold fields.”
“What makes you think Mr. Blake won’t run off somewhere, too?”
“For one thing, he’s older, more settled than the other men. And if I pay him more and offer him a room in the house, those would be incentives to stay. Dave’s different. He shouldn’t be treated like just another hired hand.”
“So you plan to allow him into the house.”
“He deserves it. Look at the way he cares for Adam. I wouldn’t trust Adam with any of the other men. They’re likely to put him down somewhere and forget him. Not Dave.”
“Must I be plagued day and night with sermons on this man’s virtues? I’m sure if we knew all there is to know about Mr. Blake, we’d know things of which he isn’t proud.”
“I’m sure there are. But no one’s perfect. Then you really have no specific objection to Dave moving to the house? The good really does seem to outweigh the bad.”
Seth returned. “Dave, I’ve just talked to Morgan about your moving into the house, and she would be happy to have you.”
They had already discussed it! Her opinion meant nothing. Gordon ignored the look she shot him.
“I thank you very much for the invitation, Mrs. Colter. I hope I prove to be of assistance to you and your son.”
Gordon forestalled her reply. “I’ve taken the liberty of having Carol prepare your room.” Gordon again ignored the look Morgan flashed at him. “Come upstairs and I’ll show it to you. It was Morgan’s father’s room.”
Morgan didn’t follow them. She was furious with Gordon for planning all this without her consent. It wouldn’t be easy to stay away from Seth when she saw him every morning at breakfast.
Her father’s room? Hadn’t Gordon said that? Morgan nearly toppled the dining chair in her hurry to get upstairs. Her father’s room was next to hers, and there was a connecting door between them!
They were in the room and Morgan stared at the door that led to her room. She tried to catch Gordon’s eye, but failed.
“If you’ll excuse me, Mrs. Colter, I’ll get my gear from the bunkhouse.”
She held her tongue until she heard the downstairs door close. “He can’t have this room! It’s right next to mine!”
“Morgan, have you seen the other bedrooms in this house? The housekeeper your father and mine had when this house was built decorated every bedroom for women, except three—the one Adam has, my room, and this one. I can’t see Dave with a pink coverlet and chintz curtains.”
“We’ll redecorate, we’ll…”
“Don’t be silly, Morgan. The door locks from both sides.” He walked to the door and demonstrated that it was firmly locked. “It’s as if there were no door.”
“It’s not the same at all,” she murmured.
“Morgan, I know it was a shock, seeing Dave for the first time. But his resemblance to someone you dislike is not his fault. The way you treat him is not fair. He’s a v
ery warm person when you get to know him… Well, it’s been a long day.” Gordon yawned ostentatiously. “I think I’ll go to bed. I’m sure Dave can find his own room.”
“Yes, I’m sure he can.”
Gordon did not fail to note the sarcastic tone in her voice.
Locked in her own room, she removed her gown and put it away carefully. She stepped into one of her favorite nightgowns and sat before the mirror to unpin and brush her hair. She stopped in midmotion when she heard Seth enter the room next door. She listened. Drawers opened and closed. The wardrobe door clicked. She heard his boots drop to the floor.
It’s as if he’s in this room, she thought. She looked toward the connecting door. There was silence, and then she saw the light under his door go out. She went to her own bed, blew out the lamp, and snuggled under the covers. She was feeling that peaceful relaxation just before sleep comes, when the words carried through the door to her. “Goodnight, mi querida.” Seth’s voice was a caress. The familiar endearment relaxed her even more and she fell asleep easily.
Seth stared at the room. He was glad to be out of the bunkhouse. Every time one of those men had made a crack about Morgan, he had had a difficult time controlling himself. Now there was only one thin door separating her from him. He was calm for the first time in weeks. He hadn’t liked the idea of her being alone in this house, alone with Gordon. Even if there didn’t seem to be a romantic love between them, she was his. He meant to keep her that way.
He laughed at himself. Now, Colter, that’s what caused all your trouble before—your possessive jealousy. This time he wasn’t going to ruin things. After the long kiss this afternoon, he knew she still felt something for him. It wouldn’t be long before that little door would open. He drifted off to sleep, confident.
Adam was awake especially early the next morning. He tumbled out of his bed, opened his door, and sleepily made his way to his mother’s room, just as he always did. Seth heard the stumbling steps and hastily donned his pants and intercepted Adam before he could pound on Morgan’s door.
Adam opened his eyes in surprise when Seth swept him up in his arms. His father put his finger to his lips and Adam understood. The little boy snuggled against the strong chest and closed his eyes. When Seth deposited his son in the big bed, Adam immediately turned on his stomach and went back to sleep. Seth removed his pants and climbed back into bed, leaving the hall door open. Soon both father and son were asleep.