Mom nodded and headed upstairs, and I knew that the boys, at least, were going to get the boot.
“Hi. Can I sit here?”Janice asked at lunch period the next day, pointing to an empty spot on the grass of the school's court yard next to Tamara. “Of course,” Tamara said, waving a handful or Fritos. “We'll be even more multiculti .” Tamara was one of the very few African Americans I our overwhelmingly white school, and she wasn't afraid to joke about it, particularly with Janice, who was sometimes self-conscious about being one of very few Asians.
Janice sat down cross-legged with her tray balanced on her lap. “Excuse me,” I said pointedly. “Is there any interesting...news you'd like to share?” Confusion crossed Janice's face as she chewed the school's version of meat loaf and swallowed. “What? You mean from class?”
“ No,”Isaid impatiently.“Romantic news.” I raised my eyebrows. Janice's pretty face turned pink. “Oh. You meanCal ?” Page 9
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“Of course I meanCal !” I practically exploded. “I can't believe you didn't say anything.” Janice shrugged. “We just went out once,” she said.“Last weekend.” Tamara and I waited.
“Can you embellish, please?” I pressed after a minute. “I mean, we're your friends. You went out with the single best-looking guy on the planet. We deserve to know.” Janice looked pleased and embarrassed. “It didn't really seem like a date,”she said finally. “It's more, like, he's trying to get to know people. Know the area. We drove around and talked a lot, and he wanted to know all about the town and the people...” Tamara and I looked at each other. “ Hmm,”Isaid finally. “So you're not hooking up or anything?” Tamara rolled her eyes. “Be blunt, why don't you Morgan?” Janice laughed. “It's fine,”she said.“And no. No hooking up. I think we're just friends.” “Hmmm,” I said again. “He is friendly, isn't he?” “Speak of the devil,” Tamara said softly. I looked up to seeCal ambling toward us, his lips curved in a smile. “Hey,” he said, crouching on the grass next to us. “Am I interrupting anything?” I shook my head and drank my soda in an attempt to look casual. “Are you gettingsettle in?” Tamara asked. “Widow's Vale is pretty small, so it probably won't take you long to figure out where everything it.” Calsmiled at her, and I blinked at his supernatural face. By now I expected to have this reaction when I was around him, so it didn't bother me as much. “Yeah.It's pretty here,”Calsaid. “Full of history. I feel like I've gone back in time.” Her looked down at the patch of grass, absently stroking a bladebetween hid fingers. I tried not to stare, but I found myself wanting to touch what he touched. “I came over to ask if you guys would come to a party this Saturday night,”Calsaid. We were all so surprised that we didn't say anything for a second. It seemed gutsy for a relative stranger to throw a party so soon.
“ Rowlands!” Breecalled from across the lawn, then came and sank down gracefully on the grass next to me. She gaveCal a beautiful smile.“Hi,Cal .” Page 10
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“Hey. I've been going around inviting people to a party this Saturday.”Calsaid. “A party!”Bree looked like this was the best idea she'd ever heard. “What kind of party? Where? Who's coming?”
Cal laughed, leaning back his head so I could see the strong column of his throat, with its smooth tan skin. In the vee of his shirt hung a worn leather string with a silver pendant on it, a five-pointed star surrounded by a circle. I wondered what the symbol meant. “Well the weather's all right, it will be an outdoor party,”Calsaid. “Mostly I just want to have a chance to talk to people, you know, not at school. I'm a sking most of the juniors and seniors--” “ Really?” Bree'slovely brows arched. “ Sure,”Calsaid. “The more the merrier. I figured we could all meet up outside. The weather;sbeen beautiful lately, and there's this field right at the edge of town over past Tower's market. I thought we could sit around and talk, look at the stars....” We all stared at him. Kids hung out at the mall. Kids hung out at the movie theater. Kids even hung out at the 7-Eleven when things got really slow. But nobody ever hung out in the middle of an empty field out past Tower's market.
“This isn't the kind of thing you usually do, is it?”he asked. “Not really,”Bree said carefully. “But it sounds great.” “Okay. Well, I'll print up some directions. Hope you guys can come.”He stood smoothly, gracefully, the way an animalrises .
I wish he were mine.
I was shocked that my brain had formed the thought. I'd never felt that way about anyone. And Cal Blaire was so out of my league that wanting him seemed stupid, almost pathetic. I shook my head. This was pointless. I would just have to snap out of it. When he was gone, my friends turned to each other excitedly. “What kind of a party is this?”Tamara wondered out loud. “I wonder if there'll be a keg or something,”Bree said. “ Ithink I'm going out of town this weekend,”Janice said, looking half disappointed, half relieved. The four of us watched asCal approached Bree's other friends, who were hanging out on the benched at the edge of the school grounds. After talking to them, he headed to the stoners clustered by the doors to the cafeteria. The funny thing was,he looked just like each crowd he spoke to. When he was with the brains, like me and Tamara and Janice, he was totally believable as a gorgeous, brilliant, deeply inquisitive scholar type. When he was with Bree's friends, he looked cool, casual, and hip: a trendsetter. And when he was standing next to Raven and Chip, I could totally imagine him as a stoner, smoking pot every day after school. It was amazing how comfortable he was with everyone. Page 11
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On one level I envied it since I'm comfortable with only a small group of people, my good friends. In fact, my two closest friends, Bree and Robbie, I've known since we were babies and our families lived on the same block. That was before Bree's family moved into a huge modern house with a view of the river and long before we'd split up into different cliques. Bree and I were two of the only people at our school who managed to be close despite belonging to different groups. Calwas...universal, in a way. And even though I was nervous, I wanted to go to that party.
3. The Circle
>..
I am casting the net. Pray for my success, that I may increase our number and find those for whom I search.
The porch light cast a shadow across our lawn. Before me, on the crunchy, dried-out autumn grass, a small, darkerme walked to my car. “What's wrong with Breezy?”I asked. “She's making a weird pinging noise,”Bree said. I rolled my eyes, hoping she could see me. Bree's expensive, sensitive car was always doing one thing or another.So much for fancy engineering. Page 12
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I opened the driver's side door and eased onto the cool vinyl seat of Das Boot, my beautiful white '71 Chrysler valiant. My dad likes to joke that my car weighs more than a submarine, so we named it Das Boot, the German word for boat and the title of my dad's all-time favorite movie, Bree climbed in the other side, and we waved good-bye to my dad, who was putting out the trash. “Drive carefully, sweetheart,”he called. I started the engine and glanced out my window at the sky. The waning moon was a thin, sharp crescent. A wisp of a dark cloud drifted across it, blotting it from the sky and making the stars pop into prominence.
“Are you going to tell me where Chris is?”I asked as I turned ontoRiverdale Drive . Bree sighed, “I told him I promised to go with you,”she said. “Oh, jeez, don't tell me,”I groaned. “I'm afraid of driving by myself at night; is that it?” Bree rubbed he forehead. “ Sorry,”shemuttered. “He's gotten so possessive. Why do guys always do that? You go out with them for a while, and suddenly they own you.” She shi
vered, though it was barely chilly. “Turn right on Westwood.” Westwood headed right out of town, northward. Bree waved the piece of paper that had the directions. “I wonder what this will be like.Cal is really...different, isn't he?”
“Uh-huh.” I took a swig of seltzer, letting the conversation die. I was reluctantto talk to Bree aboutCal , but I wasn't sure why.
“Okay, okay!”Bree said excitedly a few minutes later. “This is it! Stop here!” She was already scrambling out of her seat belt, grabbing her macramé purse. “ Bree,”Isaid politely, looking around. “We're in the middle of freaking nowhere.” Technically, of course, you're always somewhere. But this deserted road on the out skirts of town didn't feel like it. To the left were acres of cornfields, tall and awaiting harvest. To the right was a wide strip of unmowed field edged by think woods that led back toward town in a large, ragged vee . “It says to park under that tree,”Bree instructed me. “Come on.” I eased Das Boot off the side of the road and glided heavily to a stop beneath a huge willow oak. That was when I saw moonlight glinting off at least seven other cars that hadn't been visible from the road.
Robbie's distinctive red VW Beetle sat glowing darkly like a giant lady bug under the tree, and I saw Matt Adler's white pickup, Sharon's SUV, and Tamara's dad's station wagon edged up neatly next to them. Parked in a sloppy circle around themwere Raven Meltzer's battered black wreck, a gold Explorer that I recognized asCal 's, and a green minivan that I thought belonged to Beth Nielson, Raven's best friend. I didn't see any people, but there was a somewhat trampled path though the tall, dried grass toward the woods.
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“I guess we're supposed to go there,”Bree said, sounding uncharacteristically unsure. I was glad she was here with me and that Chris wasn't. If I'd had to come by myself,I might not have had the nerve to show.
We followed the path of beaten grass, the cool evening breeze filtering though my hair. When we reached the edge of the woods, Bree pointed. I could barely make out the pale gleam of her fingers in the forest darkness. Looking ahead, I saw it: a small clearing and shadowed shapes standing around a low fire ringed with stone. I heard a low laughter and smelled the delicious sent of wood smoke coiling though the newly crisp air. Suddenly an out door party seemed like a brilliant idea. We stepped carefully though the woods toward the fire. I heard Bree swearing under her breath—her chunky platform sandals weren't the best shoes for nighttime hiking. My own clogs were cheerfully crunching twigs underfoot. I heard a crashing sound behind us and startled, then saw it was Ethan
Sharp and Alessandra Spotford , lurching through the forest after us. “Watch it!”Alessandra hissed at Ethan. “That branch hit me right in the eye. Bree and I emerged into the clearing. I saw Tamara and Robbie and even Ben Reggio from my Latin class. I went over to join the three of them as Bree split off from me to stand by Sharon, Suzanne, Jenna, and Matt. The firelight cast a soft golden glow on everyone's faces, making the girls look prettier than usual and the guys looked older and mysterious. “Where's Cal ?”Bree asked, and Chris Holly straightened up from where he was crouched by an ice chest, a beer in his hand.
“Why do you want to know?”he said unpleasantly. She ran her fingers though her hair. “He's our host.” Calappeared almost silently from the edge of the clearing. He was carrying a large wicker hamper, which he set down next to the fire. “ Hi,”hesaid, looking around at us and smiling. “Thanks for coming. I hope the fire will keep you warm.”
I pictured myself snuggling up to him, his arm around my shoulders, feelingthe heat of his skin slowly seep though my fleece vest. I blinked quickly, and the image was gone. “I brought some stuff to eat and drink,”Calsaid, kneeling and opening his basket. “There's food in here—nuts, chips, corn bread. There's stuff to drink in the coolers.” “I should have brought some wine,”Bree said, and I blinked in surprise to see her standing right there.Cal smiled at her, and I wondered if he thought she was beautiful. For the next half hour we hung out and talked, sitting around the fire, maybe twenty of us altogether. Cal had brought some delicious apple cider spiced with cinnamon for people who didn't want beer, which included me.
Chris sat next to Bree, his arm around her shoulders. She wasn't looking at him but sent me irritated glanced from time to time. Tamara and Ben and I sat with our knees touching. One of my arms was almost to warm from the fire, and the other was pleasantly chilly. From time to timeCal 's voice Page 14
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flowed over me like the night air.
“I'm glad you all came tonight,”Calsaid, coming over to kneel next to me. He spoke loud enough for everyone to hear. “My mom knew people here before we moved, so she has a bunch of friends already, but I thought I'd have to celebrate Mabon by myself.” Bree smiled and leaned forward. “What's Mabon ?” “Tonight is Mabon,”Calsaid. “It's one of the Wiccan sabbats .Kind of an important day if you practice Wicca. It's the autumnal equinox.” You could have heard a leaf land at that moment. We were all looking at him, his face golden and flame colored, like a mask. Nobody said anything. Cal seemed aware of our surprise, but he didn't look embarrassed or self-conscious. In fact, he plowed on. “See, usually on Mabon you have a special circle,”Calcontinued, crunching into an apple. “You give thank s for the harvest. And after Mabon you start looking forward to Samhain .” “ Sowen?” JennaRuiz said faintly. “S-a-m-h-a- i-n,”Calclarified.“Pronounced Sow-en.Our biggest holiday, the witches'new year . October 31. Most people call it Halloween.” Silence, broken only bythe crackling of the logs as they burned. Chris was the first to speak.“So, what, man?”he said with a nervous laugh.“You saying you're a witch?”
“Well, yeah, actually. I practice a form of Wicca.”Calsaid. “Isn't that like devil worship?”Alessandra asked, wrinkling her nose. “No, no. Not at all,”Calresponded in a way that wasn't the least bit defensive. “There is no devil in Wicca. It's about the tamest and most inclusive religion there it, truthfully. It's all about celebrating na ture.”
Alessandra looked skeptical.
“So, anyway, I was hoping to find a few people to make a circle with me tonight.” Silence.
Cal looked around, absorbing the surprise and discomfort in almost every face but showing no sign of regret. “Listen, it's not a big deal. Making a circle doesn't mean you're joining Wicca. It doesn't mean you're going against your religion or whatever. If you're not into it, don't worry about it. I just thought some people might think it's cool.” I looked at Tamara. Her dark brown eyes were wide. Bree turned tome, and we shared a whole conversation's worth of ideas. Yes, we were both surprised and alittle skeptical , but we were both intrigued, too. Bree's look told me shewas interested , she wanted to hear more. I felt the same way. Page 15
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“What do youmean, a circle?”It was a few seconds before I recognized the voice as my own. “We all stand in a circle,”explainedCal , “and join hands, and give thanks to the Goddess and the God for the harvest. We celebrate the fertility of the spring and summer and look forward to the barrenness of winter. And wewas in a circle.” “You're joking,”Todd Ellsworth said, sipping his beer. Callooked at him evenly. “No, I'm not. But if you're not into it, that's fine.” “Jesus, he's serious,” Chris said to no one in particular. Bree deliberately shrugged his arm of hershoulders, and he scowled at her. “ Anyway,”Calsaid, standing up. “It's almost en. Anyone who wants to stay is welcome, but you're also welcome to leave. Thanks a lot for coming and hanging out, either way.” Raven stood up and walked over to cal, her dark, heavily outlined eyes on his. “I'll stay.”She turned a disdainful face to the rest of us, as if to say, “You wankers .” “I think I'm gonna go home,”Tamara whispered to me, and stood up. “I'm going to stay for a while,”I said softly, and she nodded, waved good-bye to Cal, and left. “I'm outta
here,”said Chris loudly, throwing his beer bottle into the woods. He got to his fee. “Bree? Come on?”
“I came with Morgan,”Bree said, moving closer to me. “I'll go home with her.” “Come with me now,”Chris insisted. “No, thanks,”Bree said, meeting my eyes. I gave her the slightest smile of encouragement. Chris swore, then crashed of through the trees, muttering. I reached over and squeezed her arm. I cast a glance atCal . He was sitting with his knees bent and his elbows resting on them. There seemed to be no tension in his body. He just watched. Raven, Bree, and I stayed. Ben Reggio left. Jenna stayed, so of course Matt stayed, too. Robbie stayed: good. Beth Nielson stayed, and so did Sharon Goodfine and Ethan Sharp. Alessandra hesitated but stayed, and so did Suzanne and Todd. When it looked like everyone had left who was going to, there were thirteen of us standing there. “ Cool,”Calsaid, standing. “Thanks for staying. Let's get started.
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4. Banishing
>..
While we milled around uncertainly,Cal took a stick and drew a large, perfect circle in the ground around the fire. Before he joined the two ends of the circle, he gestured us inside, thenclosed the circle as if he were shutting a door. I felt a bit like a sheep inside a pen. ThenCal took out a bow of salt and sprinkled it all around the drawn circle. “With this salt, I purify our circle,” he said.
Bree and I glanced at each other and smiled tentatively. “Okay, nowlets join hands,”Calsaid, holding out his hands. A wave of shy self-consciousness washed over me as I realized I was standing closest to his left hand. He reached for my hand and held it. Raven went toCal 's other side, taking his right hand firmly. Bree was on my other side, the Jenna and Matt, Beth, Alessandra, Todd, and Suzanne.Sharon, Ethan, and Robbie made up the other side, and Robbie held Raven's other hand. Cal lifter myhand, and our arms were raised to the narrow patch of clear sky above us. “Thanks to the Goddess,”Cal said in a strong voice. He looked around the circle at the rest of us. “Now you guys say it.