I tore my eyes away and scowled at the room as a whole. This wasn't so funny anymore.
"Mr. Fawkes, why don't you make a similar comment to this young lady like I just did to you?"
I cleared my throat and tried hard not to roll my eyes. "Good morning, Miss Weiss," I droned. "You are looking very nice today in your--uh--"
And then I looked at her to see what she was wearing. A pencil skirt and a silky blouse that hugged her curves. Jesus Christ. What kind of God up there didn't like me that he gave me a gorgeous intern--one I already knew was hot as a chili pepper in bed, too--that I wasn't allowed to touch? I'd have to continue to fight to keep my hands off of her, and if last night was any indication, it was a losing battle.
No, this was Karma, and she was biting me in the ass right this very minute. This was for every one of the women I'd dated in the past who had told me some day the Universe would get even with me for being a callous asshole.
It took me a second to realize I was standing here gaping at her and had not continued my sentence.
"Go ahead and put your hand on her arm," Essie coached.
Instead, I rested it lightly on her shoulder. I could feel the delicate bra strap through her silky top. It reminded me that last night I'd finally gotten a taste of what was underneath that bra. The memory of her succulent nipple beading in my mouth almost made me sprout wood right then and there. I jerked my hand away as if it had been burned, then took a step back.
April was beet red again, eyes on the floor.
"So, uh, how does his behavior make you feel, Miss Weiss? Do you feel comfortable telling him that he is being inappropriate?"
Self-consciously, she flicked her dark hair over her shoulder. "Mr. Fawkes, you are being inappropriate," she muttered.
Essie nodded her approval. I shoved my hands in my pockets. "Uh, I'm terribly sorry about that, Miss Weiss. It, uh, won't happen again."
"Feel her up!" someone called from the back of the room.
Shocked, my mouth fell open, but before I could say anything, Adam was on his feet, his face flushed red. "All right, I've had enough of this bullshit," he said, his narrowed eyes skimming the group in the room. "I've been through three meetings, and this is by far the worst of the lot. Don't you realize the reason we are here in the first place is because of wildly inappropriate employee behavior? Do you think I like wasting my time and yours sitting through stuff you should have learned in grade school? Keep your hands to yourself--one of the basic rules of human behavior. But we're here because someone obviously doesn't have a damn clue how to do that."
My mouth continued to hang open as I watched my friend completely lose his cool. Essie looked extremely uncomfortable, and April--well, she had her head down, her face curtained by swaths of thick, dark hair.
"Someone who works here filmed an intimate moment and then uploaded that to the Internet for the world to see. The moment they did that, they involved this company. And I don't know how you feel about your jobs here, but it should offend the hell out of all of you that someone did that. That someone represented your company that way. That they had that little respect for the institution to which all of you dedicate a great amount of your time, effort and brainpower. I'll tell you right now, that pisses me off. Because I spend a pretty large chunk of my life to make this a great company, and if I ever find out who did this...well, they'll be looking for a new job before they can blink."
The room was silent now, faces down. No one was meeting Adam's gaze and people clearly looked ashamed. However, none of them were responsible for the tape.
I should be the one ashamed--and I was. I cast a guilty glance in Adam's direction, once again cursing my thoughtless actions. We'd both worked so hard for this, built this company from nothing in almost five short years. And with one drunken night of hot sex--and apparently poor choice of hot partner--I'd endangered all our hard work.
Thank the gods above we were asked to return to our desks soon after and let out early by a somewhat exasperated and exhausted Essie.
Chapter 11
April
The minute the meeting let out, I fought my way out the door, ready to bolt back to my desk and huddle into a little ball. In all likelihood, I'd be hard pressed to keep it together until quitting time. That was not to be, however. Cari came up beside me, hooking a hand around my arm.
"Hey, April," she said with that super-fake, sing-songy tone she used. Dread knotted in the pit of my stomach. I had no desire to talk to her right now.
"Hey, Cari...sorry, I gotta get running. I have tons of stuff to get done before--"
But as we moved down the hall, she abruptly turned down a side hallway, jerking me along with her. "Ow! What the--"
Cari turned to me, her crazy eyes burning bright. "Did you see how hot he was just now? I am so turned on just hearing him yell at everyone like that. I bet he's so commanding and dominant in bed."
Oh, fucking hell. I had real shit to worry about--like having caused an honest-to-goodness scandal. And here she was still nurturing her unrequited lust for the boss? I jerked my arm out of her grip. "I have a ton of work to do right now--"
"Come on, April. You can help me. You've got a position working up front. I'm not going to give up on this. It's the only thing that has kept me going for the last few months--kept my mind off all the crap going on in my life."
I swallowed, genuinely sorry for her. She blinked tears out of her eyes and gave a shivery sigh. I couldn't help it. Cari was bordering on psychopathic obsession with this, but I still felt sorry for her. I wondered what it must be like to lose a sibling, to have that pain constantly. I had siblings, but they were a lot younger and practically strangers. My own fault, really, as the Queen of Avoidance.
"Cari, you're so beautiful. There are tons of great guys out there for you. But--"
She jerked back. "I want the best one. I want him. Please say you'll help."
I opened my mouth to protest, but what could I say? Adam had already found someone. Someone who made him happy. Cari had no right to horn in on that.
"It would really be a shame..." she began with narrowed eyes.
I frowned but didn't say anything, suddenly feeling a dark premonition. "After hearing him talk like that...I'm sure our upset CEO would be very interested to know just who is responsible for that video."
The blood drained from my face.
She saw my reaction, a satisfied smile hovering on her lips. "Your secret's safe with me, April. But you're going to help me, right?"
My fists tightened at my sides. She noticed my silent protest and arched an eyebrow. "Because if you don't--"
She stopped when footsteps approached behind me. I swallowed a knot of fear but didn't dare look over my shoulder. Cari looked up at whoever it was--whoever must have heard our conversation. Her eyes widened.
"Oh...hey, Jordan. How are you?"
I took a deep breath and let it go, unable to turn and look at him.
"I was doing just great until I overheard someone threatening my assistant with what sounded a lot like blackmail." His voice was even, clipped, low, probably to prevent someone else eavesdropping on us. But I could tell he was ragingly pissed off. And for once, I wasn't the target of his anger.
Cari's eyes grew impossibly wider, clearly shocked at this transformation in the typically joking, devil-may-care CFO. She glanced quickly from him to me and back again. "Oh...well, maybe you misheard that. I wasn't--"
"Yes, you were. I know exactly what I heard."
Her mouth dropped. She turned her gaze on me, as if expecting me to intervene. "I wasn't threatening you, was I, April?"
I opened my mouth to answer, hesitating because I knew I had to play this carefully so that Cari wouldn't fly off the handle.
"Don't answer her, Weiss," Jordan interrupted. "Now Miss..." When Cari opened her mouth to supply her last name, he waved her off. "It doesn't matter. What matters is that I don't tolerate that sort of behavior in this office. Especially from an intern."
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Cari's features went scarlet and she shot me a look of pure fury. "What if I knew who the person was responsible for that video? I'm sure Adam would really want to know that little bit of information, wouldn't he?"
"Despite what he may have said in there, he already knows. And so do I. So you have no leg to stand on. The only thing you'd accomplish by denouncing a colleague is to make yourself--and this company--look bad. So unless you'd like me to pick up my phone and make a call to Dr. Tretham--that's your advisor at the university, right? I have his number on my on my phone right here. We speak regularly about the intern exchange between the university and this company." I detected a movement behind me, presumably Jordan producing his cell phone and holding it up.
Cari's jaw dropped. "Please don't do that...."
"Why shouldn't I? Were you not standing here blackmailing my assistant with some bullshit accusation?"
Cari sent me a pleading look but I said nothing, folding my arms tightly across my chest. I was shaking so hard I was certain she could see it. He probably could, too.
"Now, if I hear one word that you are speaking to anybody--anybody--about this matter, I will have security escort you out of here so quickly it will make your head spin. Do you understand?"
Cari shook her massive amounts of hair. "But--"
"Do. You. Understand?" he repeated between clenched teeth.
She visibly swallowed. "Y--yes."
"I can assure you that if you speak of this to anyone or go to any of the other officers with this, you will wish you never set foot in this building. You signed an NDA when you came to work here, and if you violate it, you will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. Is that clear?"
Cari's lips disappeared inside her mouth, and she looked as if she was about to start crying.
"Weiss," Jordan said.
I cocked my head toward him, but I couldn't meet his eyes. "You are to stay away from this young woman, do you hear me? And she's not allowed near you either. If you see her in the atrium, phone security and have her escorted out of the building. Now get back to your desk."
"Yes, sir," I croaked, and without looking at Cari, I turned and fled.
***
I have no idea what else he said to Cari after I left, but Jordan didn't show up at the atrium for another ten minutes. Ten minutes that I tried valiantly to keep it together and not cry. I sniffed. I blinked. Susan pretended not to notice. I kept my face down and attempted--and failed--to continue with my work.
I was proofreading a document that someone on Jordan's team had prepared for him, penciling in corrections through blurry vision, when a shadow appeared across my desk. I jumped even though I knew who it was. I didn't look up and was well aware that I looked hunched and miserable.
"Weiss," he began in a low voice. "I need to speak to you in my office. Now, please." Where had the "please" come from?
I swallowed, and without a word, I got up and preceded him into the office. Susan cast a concerned glance at me, but I didn't hold her gaze for longer than a second. The minute I walked through the door, the tears sprang from my eyes so instead of stopping to face him, I headed straight for his private bathroom. He followed me in, despite the fact that I was certain he knew I was upset. I turned toward the wall, away from the mirror's reflection. It was the second time in two days that he'd caught me losing it. Just great.
When I'd regained control of myself, I squared my shoulders and then turned to face him. It was time to inform him that I was ready to end this now.
It was time for me to take my lumps. I almost felt relieved about it.
Chapter 12
Jordan
I gave her a moment to collect herself, but it was more for me than it was for her. Crying women always made me uneasy. They often brought out that old misplaced sense of chivalry in me--like I was somehow responsible for the crying and it fell on me to stop it.
I'd made a woman or three cry in my lifetime. Sometimes I felt guilty about it. More often, I didn't. But this one was shaking me more than I'd anticipated. I rubbed my jaw and watched her quietly pull herself together, straighten her shoulders and turn to face me.
Her blue eyes were clouded with uncertainty, self-questioning. I'd wanted to crack her cool facade, but this wasn't what I had in mind. April was tender and vulnerable inside. The thickness of the walls she'd built to protect herself didn't change that.
I took a breath and let it go. "Are you okay?"
She pressed her hands to her cheeks and shook her head.
I sighed and looked away. "She's not going to say anything now that I've put the fear of God into her."
She shook her head again, apparently still too emotional to speak.
I clenched my teeth, annoyed at how much it was bothering me to see her this way. "Weiss. You need to take a deep breath and calm down. You don't have anything to be scared about."
"I--I'm not scared. I'm guilty. I'm a horrible person. I--"
"You aren't a horrible person. Stop it."
"Everyone had to do all that because of me. Because of what I did. I don't even know why you are covering for me like this. You--"
"Because you're part of my team and I protect my own. I'm the only one who has the right to torment you and make your life hell, got it? She's not--"
"But why?" Her dark brows scrunched, and she scanned my face as if she were trying to solve a puzzle. "Why are you letting me stay on your team? You could have let me go on the first day. I know you lied to her just now, about the fact that Adam knows it's me. He doesn't know it's me. But he should."
That worried me. I shook my head. "Calm down. You don't even know what you're saying."
She straightened, lifting her chin. "I'm going to end this."
I did not like the sound of that. At all. "What do you mean?"
"I'm going to talk to Adam and tell him that I'm responsible for the video, explain it was an accident, and then I'm going to apologize and resign on the spot."
My entire body tensed and my gut tightened. "And what will that solve?"
She turned, grabbed a tissue and dried her face. "It will get Cari off my case and make me feel better."
"Cari is already off your case. And how will it make you feel better to be dismissed from your internship in disgrace, with no chance of getting a recommendation for business school?"
She looked away, her bottom lip trembling. "So, you know how...how I was the one who made the video? And you know that question you asked Essie...about one of the people not knowing they were being recorded?"
I blinked and swallowed, suddenly feeling more than a little guilty. I didn't say anything though, and she took that as a prompt to continue talking--even if I preferred that she drop it.
"Well, you were right. He didn't know...the guy, I mean. It was so stupid. I was drunk and feeling pretty high on the whole experience. I'd never done anything like that before and...well, it was a bit of a fantasy, I have to admit. So, on an impulse, I pulled out the phone to record it. I figured I'd erase it right away. But..." She took in a deep breath and let it go. "I had no idea I was committing a crime. I feel wretched. And the poor guy, he had no idea. I need to find him. I need to apologize."
"Hold the phone. Just calm down, all right? He's fine. He's safe. Nobody knows who he is. He has no reason to want to come after you and put you in jail. The sexual harassment stuff, well, all companies have to do that sort of training by law anyway. So yeah there's been extra inconvenience brought about by what you did, but I've got it handled, okay? No need to go throwing yourself on a sword in self-sacrifice. Nobody needs that kind of drama."
She huffed. "I didn't want it to be about drama. I'm just...I'm trying to do the right thing."
"Sometimes it's best not to. That's another thing you need to learn about business. Ethics are slippery things." And God, wouldn't I know about that? This would have been an appropriate time to let her know that I knew all about her partner in the video because it was me.
It occurr
ed to me--it honestly did. But the less she knew, the better. At least that was the lie I told myself so as to not hate what I was doing. It would be for her own good.
And yeah, it helped that it was for my own good as well.
She sniffed and then looked at me--really looked at me--with a gaze that seemed to penetrate my own facade. I almost drew back, startled.
"Why are you doing this, Jordan? Why do you care so much?"
I blinked. Her question took me totally by surprise. Why do you care so much? Good question. I had no idea. I wasn't supposed to care. I'd told myself a long time ago that I wasn't going to ever care again. It had hurt too much, that once.
But this woman was doing something...something she didn't even know she was doing.
And I was allowing it to happen.
I rubbed a hand over my mouth and shrugged. "I care about this company. I care about the IPO being successful. I care about you keeping your nose clean and getting out of here without upsetting more than you have already. That's what I care about."
Her brows drew together and I stepped back. I didn't want to feel her near me again, didn't want to smell her. I didn't want to care. So, I wouldn't. That was it. I'd flip it off, like a switch. I was good at that. I could do that.
I had to.
But there was still a thing or two that I wanted to know. "Why didn't you speak up for yourself with Cari? Why'd you let her trample all over you like that?"
She shrugged.
"That's not an answer and you aren't four," I ground out. "Somewhere along the line, you learned that you aren't worth standing up for. That other people's feelings and opinions are more valuable than your own. You keep those feelings inside and show the world a brave face."
She looked at me like I'd slapped her. "And there's something wrong with that?"
I nodded. "In the process of trying to save everyone else's feelings, you give no value to your own. Because you're too nice. That will get you nowhere. I learned a long time ago that nice guys finish last. Do you want to finish last?"