Page 13 of True Colors


  She skidded to a stop beside him. His right cheek was cut open. One eye was swollen and turning black.

  “Hey, Princess,” he said, wincing, trying to smile.

  “Oh, Dal . . . I’m sorry—”

  “We’ve got to get him into the ambulance,” said one of the paramedics, and she nodded and stepped back.

  “I’ll meet you at the hospital,” she promised.

  “Don’t.”

  She leaned down and kissed his good cheek.

  “It’ll be ugly in there, Vivi . . .”

  “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have lied.”

  There was no time to say more. The paramedics rolled him to the ambulance, loaded him in, and drove off.

  In the sudden, quiet darkness, Vivi Ann stared at her grandfather’s cabin, trying to find the strength she needed to face Luke.

  When she was ready, she went up to the front door and stepped inside.

  Only it wasn’t just Luke. He stood near the kitchen sink, flanked by Winona and Dad.

  Vivi Ann’s step faltered, but she kept going, walked up to them.

  “I’m sorry, Luke. I went to your house to tell you—”

  “Too late, Vivi,” he said.

  “But—”

  “Your chickenshit boyfriend didn’t even fight back.” He pushed past her and walked out of the cabin. The door banged shut behind him.

  Vivi Ann stood there, hearing his truck start up and drive away. In the silence that followed, she looked at her father and Winona. “I’m sorry, Daddy. You must have felt like this when you met Mom—”

  He smacked her across the cheek so hard she stumbled sideways.

  “You’ll be at the parade tomorrow, with this family, and by God, you will not disgrace me again.”

  Vivi Ann sat in her grandmother’s wing chair all night. If she slept at all it was a catnap here or there. Mostly she stared out the window at the darkened expanse of Water’s Edge.

  You’ll be at the parade. You will not disgrace me.

  There was no doubt at all about what that meant. Her dad was reminding her that she was a Grey and as such was expected to align with her family. He knew, as she did, that she could be forgiven for this affair, even for hurting Luke. It would not be pretty, or come without pain, but forgiveness could be granted in time. Things were done a certain way in Oyster Shores and everyone knew the rules. All she had to do was repent and return home in acknowledgment of her sin.

  His ultimatum had been a reminder that family bonds were strong. For all her life, she’d taken that fact as a bedrock truth; indisputable. Last night, though, she’d glimpsed a fragility that was new to her, a fault line running beneath the surface of their family. Never before had she considered that it might all be conditional, that if a wrong choice was made, a misstep taken, the once-solid ground could crack in half and let them fall.

  Her choice now was clear: Dallas or her family. It was like having to choose between an arm and a leg, lungs and a heart.

  At last, dawn came to Water’s Edge, spilling over the steel-gray Canal and illuminating the snowcapped mountains on the opposite shore. She went to the barn and fed her horses, then returned to the cabin, where she sat on the porch, watching.

  She was there when Dad left the house and walked over to his truck.

  Did he glance up here? She couldn’t be sure. But he drove away without once slowing down as he passed her truck. Soon he would be pulling up to the diner, where he’d meet his friend for breakfast; then, at noon, he’d drive to Grey Park. The family always met in the same spot before every town gathering. There, the various pieces came together to make up the whole. He cared deeply that they all showed up to things together, a subtle reminder that they were a family that mattered in this town. Her dad would meet Aurora first (she was always early) and then Winona.

  The pain at that thought surprised her, so she pushed it aside. Her sister had betrayed her last night; it was a thing that had to be dealt with. Later.

  Now it was time to make a decision. She could go back to her family or she could go to Dallas.

  She wished it were a difficult choice, but the truth was that she wanted Dallas Raintree.

  It had always come down to that, from the very first time he reached for her hand and led her onto that dance floor.

  She got dressed and went to her truck. As she drove out of town, she could hear the start of the parade, but by the time she reached the gas station it was gone and the world was quiet again, leaving her time to think, to worry.

  Would he still be there?

  Did he even want her? He had never said the word love to her.

  At the hospital, she found him in his room, standing at the window, looking out. When the door opened, he turned to her. “Go away, Vivi. We’re done.”

  She crossed the room, went around the bed, and approached him. Her gaze moved along his face, his injuries, pausing at every stitch and bruise. He’d have a new scar along his cheek-bone because of her. “You should have defended yourself.”

  “Should I?”

  “You did nothing wrong. I was the one who was engaged.”

  “Leave me, Vivi Ann.”

  “Tell me you don’t want me and I’ll leave.”

  “I don’t want you.”

  She saw the lie in his pale gray eyes. “What’s my favorite ice cream?”

  “Vanilla. Why?”

  “Marry me,” she said, surprising herself.

  “You’re crazy.”

  “We’ve been crazy from the start.”

  Time slowed down for a moment. She realized how much she wanted him to say yes and she was afraid. All her life, she’d gotten what she wanted. What if that meant she would lose it now, when it mattered most?

  “Say something,” she pleaded.

  Winona heard her front door bang open and knew exactly who it was. She sat down on the end of her bed, waiting.

  Aurora came around the corner in a cloud of Giorgio perfume. “What the fuck?”

  Winona was dressed for the parade, but even with her curled hair and heavier-than-usual makeup, she knew she looked bad. A sleepless night always showed in the eyes. “You heard.”

  “Are you kidding? Everyone has heard. And thanks for letting me hang out there alone, by the way. When Myrtle Michaelian spilled the beans, I told her to quit spreading lies.”

  Winona sighed. “It was ugly last night.”

  “What happened?”

  “Vivi’s been screwing Dallas Raintree.”

  Aurora sat down in the chair by the window, sighing. “Jesus. I guess that explains a lot. How did Luke find out?”

  Winona studied her ragged fingernails. She’d chewed them down to the quick last night. “When I got to the cabin, Luke was kicking the shit out of Dallas. He just stood there and took it, too, smiling the whole time like he liked it. I ran down and got Dad to stop them. But when Vivi Ann came back, he slapped her across the face and called her a disgrace.”

  “He slapped her?” Aurora frowned.

  Winona could see that her sister was fitting the pieces together. Before she could find a hole, Winona said, “It’s probably all for the best.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Better that Luke finds out now that she doesn’t love him. And God knows she can’t go around screwing a guy like Dallas. She had to know she’d get caught. She should get caught. It’s disgraceful.”

  Aurora went very still. “What did you do, Winona?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You told Luke, didn’t you? I knew it was all going to go to crap when you wouldn’t tell Vivi Ann the truth.”

  Winona got to her feet. “Don’t be ridiculous. Let’s go to the parade. Vivi Ann will be there. Dallas will be gone and everything will be fine. You’ll see.”

  “You think Vivi Ann will show?”

  “Where else would she go?”

  “What if she doesn’t forgive you?”

  Winona didn’t answer that. Instead, she shuffled Aur
ora out of the house and toward the sidewalk. As they walked to Grey Park, she tried not to think about last night, but Aurora’s words had brought it all back. Now she couldn’t forget anything . . . her agonizing jealousy, her desperate longing, the surge of bitterness . . .

  She’d raced to the cabin after Luke, wanting to take back what she’d done, but when she’d gotten there, she’d seen him beating Dallas up, and she’d gone for help, pulling Dad out of bed.

  Luke is beating Dallas up. You have to come.

  Luke . . . beating up Dallas? Why?

  Because Vivi has been screwing him.

  That was the moment, of all of them, that played over and over in her mind. She could tell herself it had been a heat-of-passion decision, but she couldn’t quite believe it. She’d wanted her dad to know the truth.

  When they turned the corner and came to the park her grandfather had donated to the town, she saw her father standing alongside Richard and the kids. They stood beneath a gorgeous madrona tree. For more than fifteen years they’d met here at the start of every town party or parade. It was a tradition their mother had begun, back when she’d had three small girls and a horseback 4-H group to corral. But today, as they stood there, all that mattered was who was missing.

  Every minute that passed was an aftershock that rattled the foundation of their family, cracked it just a little more. Finally, at 11:55, Dad walked over to the trash can on the street, threw his empty plastic glass away, and turned to them. His face, always craggy and a little cold, looked older. “I guess she made up her mind, then. Let’s go.”

  Aurora looked at Winona in confusion. She was chewing on her flag-painted acrylic fingernail like a rabbit with a carrot. “We can’t just leave. She’ll be here. Won’t she?”

  Winona had to admit it: she was shaken by this. It wasn’t what she’d expected.

  “Come on,” Dad said sharply. He was already to the corner, making the turn.

  Winona didn’t know what else to do, so she followed.

  She stood beside her dad for the next two hours, waiting every minute to see Vivi Ann move past her on some float or ride past on Clem.

  But her sister never showed.

  “This is trouble,” Aurora said when the last entry in the parade moved past them. “Big trouble. Tell me the whole story. Why did you—”

  Winona walked away. “I’ll talk to you later, Aurora,” she tossed over her shoulder.

  By the time she got to her car, she was practically running to avoid the gossip on the streets. She jumped into her car and drove out to Luke’s house. He would be the only person who would understand and appreciate what she’d done. She found him exactly where she’d expected to: sitting on his porch, staring out. Cuts and dried blood marked his left hand.

  “Hey,” she said.

  He barely acknowledged her, just tilted his chin a little.

  She sat down on the seat beside him, her heart aching for how hurt he felt right now. It was the same pain she’d felt since he first turned to Vivi Ann. “I’m here for you.”

  He didn’t answer, didn’t even look at her, and something about that made her nervous.

  She started to put her arm around him. “It’s all for the best, really. If she didn’t love you, you had to know that. Now you can go forward.”

  He pushed her arm away.

  “Luke?”

  “Why did you tell me?”

  “What? You had to know. What she was doing with that man was wrong. I knew how hurt you’d be.”

  “Exactly.” He got up and walked over to the porch railing, putting as much distance between them as was possible. With his back to her, he stared out at his land.

  “It’s not my fault, Luke. I wasn’t sleeping with him. I didn’t cheat on you and break your heart. What she did was wrong. Of course she got caught. I’m the one who is trying to help you. Look at me, Luke.”

  He didn’t turn around. “Just go, Winona. I can’t talk to you now.”

  She didn’t know how to react. None of this made sense to her. “But—”

  “Go. Please.”

  It was the please that grounded her. She’d come to him too soon; that was all. Of course he wasn’t ready for comforting yet. But he would be. Time healed all wounds. She just had to be patient. “Okay. I’m available anytime, though. Just call me if you need a friend.”

  “A friend,” he said, putting a sharp, strange emphasis on the word.

  She was halfway to the door when his voice stopped her.

  “Was she at the parade?”

  “No,” she said bitterly, looking back at him. “She chickened out.”

  “Did she? You think?” He sighed, and still he didn’t turn around. “You shouldn’t have told me.”

  “It broke my heart,” she said quietly, “seeing them in bed together. I knew what you’d think.”

  “I love her.”

  “Loved,” she corrected, reaching for the door. “And you didn’t even know her.”

  Vivi Ann and Dallas got married in the Mason County Courthouse, with a justice of the peace presiding and a law clerk as witness. After the ceremony, they climbed into the truck and turned on the radio. The first song that blared through the speakers was Willie Nelson’s “My Heroes Have Always Been Cowboys,” and Vivi Ann laughed and thought: That will be our song.

  All the way out of town and deep into the Olympic rain forest, they talked. When the sky turned dark and the road began to twist and turn, thrusting deep into the old-growth trees, they came to the lodge at Sol Duc, and there they rented a cabin.

  “I guess we’re just a cabin couple,” Dallas said as he carried her over the threshold and into the piney-scented room. For four days they stayed in bed, making love, caressing, talking. Vivi Ann told Dallas everything there was to know about her—when she’d lost her virginity and to whom, how it had felt to lose her mother, why she loved Oyster Shores so much, and even what foods she despised. The more she talked with him, the easier he laughed, and it became a new addiction for her, this needing to make him smile.

  On the fifth day, they hiked up the beautiful, rugged trails to the famous Sol Duc Falls. There, completely alone in the wild old-growth rain forest, with the sound of the falling water thundering around them and the air full of spray, they made love in a small clearing at the base of a two-hundred-year-old cedar tree.

  “I’m wise to you, you know,” she said when they were done, resting her back on the mossy nurse log behind them.

  He pulled out his pocketknife and began idly carving a heart in the tree’s ridged bark. “Oh, really?”

  “I’ve told you everything there is to know about me and you haven’t told me a thing. Every time I ask you a question you kiss me.”

  “That’s all that matters.” He carved his initials, then began on hers.

  “But it isn’t. We’re married now. I have to be able to answer questions about you.”

  “Are we signed up for The Newlywed Game or something?”

  “Don’t make a joke. I’m serious.”

  He finished the carving and put down his knife, looking at her finally. “If you saw someone standing on the edge of a cliff and you thought they were going to jump, what would you say?”

  “I’d tell them to back away before they got hurt.”

  “Step back, Vivi.”

  “How can it hurt me to know you?”

  “You might not like what you find out.”

  “You have to trust me, Dallas, or we won’t be able to make this thing work.”

  “Okay,” he said after a long silence. “Ask your questions.”

  “Where were you born?”

  “Big surprise: Dallas, Texas. My mom and dad met at a diner down there. She was living on the reservation with her sister.”

  “What’s her name?”

  “Her real name was Laughs Like the Wind. Her husband called her Mary. She’s dead now.”

  “And your dad?”

  “Alive.”

  She touched the sc
ars on his chest. In the fading light, they looked silvery, like skeins of broken fishing line embedded in his flesh. “How did you get these?”

  “Electrical cords and cigarettes. The old man didn’t like to look for weapons.”

  Vivi Ann flinched at that. “And your mom, did she—”

  “That’s enough for now,” he said quietly. “How about we talk about something that really matters?” he asked when she leaned against him.

  “Like?” She stared up through lacy evergreen fronds at slices of the purple sky.

  “Winona.”

  Vivi Ann sighed. They might not have talked about this in the past few days, but she’d thought about it. “She couldn’t stand what we—what I was doing to Luke and she snapped. Win’s always been a very black-and-white, right-and-wrong girl. I know I should be mad at her, and I am, but in the end, she helped me. How can I stay mad at someone when I’m married to you?”

  “So you want to go back,” he said.

  “It’s where I belong,” she said quietly. “Where I want you and our children to belong.”

  “It won’t be easy. People will talk.”

  “They always do, and I’ve finally given them something to talk about.”

  “I love you, Vivi,” he said, and in his voice was a surprising intensity. It scared and thrilled her at the same time. “I won’t let anyone hurt you. Not even Winona.”

  She laughed. “Don’t worry, Mr. Raintree. We Greys are ranchers. We know how to mend our fences.”

  On the first Saturday in September, Winona woke well before dawn and dragged her tired ass to the ranch. On the way there, she picked up Aurora, who managed to look completely put together at this ungodly hour.

  “I can’t believe she’s still not home,” Aurora said as they pulled up to the farmhouse.

  “She wants us to sweat a few bullets. It’s working, too. Dad is realizing how much he needs her around here.”

  “That’s not how she thinks.”

  “You’re assuming she does think.”

  Aurora rolled her eyes. “God, you can be a bitch. So, after all this, how’s Luke? Has he promised his undying love yet?”

  Winona slammed on the brakes hard enough to shut her sister up. “The cookie dough is in the fridge. Make as many as you can, and then take all the food to the cook shack.”