THE STREETS WERE DEADLY quiet as Gray and Carolyn made their way to the convention center area, where she was reasonably certain they’d be able to get a room. She’d wanted to call ahead, but she figured it was more important to get out of Hannah’s house before any Guardians came knocking. For security purposes, they’d be staying under a false name and paying in cash.
They stopped at an ATM on the way, where Carolyn made a maximum withdrawal. Gray was silent and brooding, his eyes distant as he fought whatever internal demons he wanted to hide from her. His hands were shoved into his coat pockets as he walked, his head bowed.
Carolyn slipped her hand through his elbow and he seemed to start out of some reverie. “We’ll get through this,” she assured him, giving his arm a squeeze.
The expression on his face lightened into something almost like a smile. “Nothing ever intimidates you, does it?”
She raised her free shoulder in a half-shrug. “It does, but I’m damn good at hiding it.”
He laughed, the cold turning his breath into a misty white cloud. He withdrew his hand from his pocket and slung his arm around her shoulders. It was only natural for her own arm to slip around his waist. His body felt wonderfully warm in the frigid night. Carolyn matched his long stride as deep down inside her a revelation unfurled.
I’ve never stopped loving him.
She closed her eyes for just a moment, wishing she could stuff that thought back down into her subconscious where it belonged.
The silence between them shifted from companionable to tense, and Carolyn couldn’t for the life of her tell if it was just her imagination. His arm tightened around her shoulders, and something stirred in her center.
Three years. Three years she’d been alone, her heart irreparably broken by Gray’s desertion. Three years she hadn’t had sex, or even a kiss, for God’s sake! Hannah had repeatedly told her she wasn’t over Gray, and Carolyn had repeatedly denied it. Well, denial wasn’t getting her anywhere anymore. She cleared her throat.
“So, about that woman …” Her voice came out husky, so she cleared her throat again. “You said you were in a relationship with her, and yet it’s me you came to.”
He sighed. “I lied about that. I was trying to protect you, keep you out of all this craziness, but you’re so damned stubborn. I thought telling you I was in a relationship with Deirdre might be the one thing I could do to get you to back off.”
And he’d been right, as far as it went. “But then you got that letter from the Banger.”
“Right. I got that letter, and I knew it was too late to keep you out of it completely.”
“So what about that time I saw you kissing her?”
He made a sound somewhere between a snort and a laugh. “She kissed me. She’s been flirting with me on and off since the beginning.”
Carolyn came to a stop, looking up into his face. “And why haven’t you taken her up on it? She’s awfully pretty.”
He said nothing, just stared down at her, his jaw clamped so tightly shut that a muscle twitched in his cheek. A lump formed in her throat as she came to her own conclusions, but Gray abruptly dropped his arm from around her shoulders and shook his head.
“Let’s keep moving,” he said, walking on without waiting to see if she was coming.
Carolyn hurried to catch up with him, her teeth worrying at her lower lip. His head was bowed, his shoulders hunched, his hands back in his pockets. She wanted to break down the wall that separated them, but he had reinforced its weak spots and she doubted she would get through.
They spoke not a word to each other as Carolyn checked them into the Marriott, paying a cash deposit. When the guy at the reception desk balked at the idea of cash, Carolyn convinced him she was a battered woman trying to hide from her abusive ex-husband. She was probably being paranoid, for it seemed unlikely the Guardians had the resources to track her by her credit card, but she wasn’t inclined to take chances. She chose a non-smoking room with two double beds.
Carolyn’s heart sped as she and Gray rode the elevator. He wasn’t looking at her, and his expression was still closed and shuttered, and yet there was a tension in the air that wasn’t born of awkwardness. She chewed her chapped lip some more, wondering if she was imagining it, sure she was not.
Once they were inside their room, the deadbolt secured, the tension rose another notch. Carolyn slipped out of her coat, tossing it over a chair. Gray stood in the middle of the room, looking indecisive, his hands still stuffed in his coat pockets.
“Aren’t you hot?” she asked, moving to the thermostat and sliding the temperature down. Of course, she didn’t think it was the heater that was generating her body heat.
Gray hesitated a moment, then shook his head and shrugged out of his coat. When he turned to drape it over the chair with hers, Carolyn saw why he’d been reluctant to take it off. He followed her gaze down to the bulge in his jeans, then raised his eyes to hers again.
“Carolyn …” he said, his voice conveying a vague warning.
She moved closer to him, her pulse throbbing insistently in her throat as warmth flooded her body and pooled between her legs. But Gray held up both hands to ward her off. She might have felt hurt, except there was no denying the desire that shone in his eyes.
“It’s glamour, Carolyn,” he said in a husky, strained voice. “I’m not trying to use it, but it seems to be a reflexive reaction. Don’t come any closer.”
She raised an eyebrow as a few puzzle pieces fell into place. She’d never thought of glamour as something to cause sexual desire, but now she remembered how badly she had wanted him when they’d gotten carried away on his living room couch. At the time, her desire for him had been totally inappropriate, and she’d attributed it to her long abstinence. Apparently, there’d been more to it than that.
Carefully, she poked at her feelings, wondering if they were genuine or whether they were artificially created by Gray’s vampire glamour. She didn’t have to think about it very long.
Shaking her head, she continued to move closer as Gray continued to back up. “It’s not glamour.”
“Yes it is!” he insisted, and he sounded almost panicked. His butt hit the dresser and he couldn’t back up any farther. His eyes had gone almost black with desire, and his erection looked like it was about to burst out of his pants. Still he held up his hands, keeping her away.
She began unbuttoning her blouse, smiling at him. “No. I remember what that felt like, and this isn’t it.” She thought the sight of her unbuttoning might push him past his resistance, but instead he reached out and grabbed her wrists, stilling her hands.
“Please, Carolyn,” he said, anguish in his voice and eyes.
“I’m not expecting this to turn back into what it once was,” she assured him. “But we’re two adults who’ve gone without for too long. We can still enjoy each others’ bodies, no matter what’s come between us before.”
Gray shook his head, not letting go of her hands.
“That’s not why I’m fighting this.” He took a long, deep breath, letting it hiss out slowly between his teeth. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed hard.
“Then why?” she asked, mystified.
“Because I can’t trust my self-control. I’m afraid I might … hurt you.” His eyes closed in pain and he bowed his head.
Gently, she extricated her wrists from his grip. Perhaps a more sensible woman would be frightened by that admission, but she only felt more keenly her body’s desires. She stepped into him, pressing her belly against the glowing heat of his erection. His eyes popped open in surprise.
“I’m not afraid of you, Gray,” she whispered, reaching up to cup her hand against his heek. “You won’t hurt me.”
The fire in his eyes flared higher, and he pulled his lips away from his teeth, baring the two sharp fangs that had appeared where his canines once were. A tremor passed through her body at the unspoken warning, but she slid her hand along his jaw, then speared her fingers through his silky dark hair and pull
ed his head down to hers.
For one agonizing instant, he resisted. Then with a guttural moan, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her hard against him. His lips pressed against hers, his tongue demanding entrance, which she eagerly granted. It was a bruising, hard kiss. She welcomed it with all her being.
One of his hands grabbed her ass and pressed her even harder against him, fingers digging into her flesh in a grip that should have been painful but wasn’t. His other hand tunneled into her hair and held her head still while his tongue ravaged her mouth. Fire coursed through her veins, and she could barely breathe. Even through the thickness of his jeans, she could feel his erection throbbing and pulsing. She moaned deep in her throat, and Gray let out a feral growl.
He raised his head from her lips, his breath coming in short gasps. His fangs were bared, his eyes dark as a moonless night. Carolyn’s breath caught in her throat as she looked into the face of lust and danger. Her heart hammered, and for a handful of beats a flicker of fear sparked in her belly.
Gray lifted her easily off her feet, his hands under her butt. Instinctively she wrapped her legs around him to keep from falling. His mouth descended on hers once more, hot and fierce and needy. She held tight to his neck, sucking on his tongue whenever it slipped into her mouth, the spark of fear overwhelmed by the inferno of her desire. He surged forward, setting her down on the foot of one of the beds.
Carolyn let out a moan of protest when he tore his lips from hers. He towered over her, his chest heaving with his hastened breaths. She wanted to reach for him, but he kept her trapped with his eyes as his fingers tore at the buttons of his shirt. She bit her lip to stifle another moan when the shirt fell from his shoulders. His chest was all lean, toned muscle that rippled when he moved. God, he was beautiful! She reached for his belt, desperate to get him completely naked, but he batted her hands away. She gasped in surprise.
Baring his fangs again, Gray pushed on her shoulders until she lay back on the bed, her legs still dangling over the edge. He practically tore off the button on her jeans, then his fingers curled into the waistband, snagging her panties at the same time. Before she knew what was happening, both jeans and panties were bunched up around her knees. Gray was still tugging on them, and she wriggled to help free herself.
Her skin glowed with the heat of her body, and she held her breath in anticipation. This was so unlike anything she had ever experienced with Gray before. She had no idea what to expect, what he would do next. She was on a roller coaster, being inexorably dragged up the endless incline, knowing the drop—terrifying and exhilarating at once—was waiting for her.
Gray jerked open his belt with hands that visibly shook. Carolyn watched, fascinated, as he popped the button open and yanked the zipper down. He didn’t bother to remove his jeans or shorts, just pulled them down far enough to free himself. Carolyn’s throat closed as her eyes fastened on his enormous erection. She had almost forgotten the mind-boggling size of him, and after three long years of abstinence, he looked even bigger than she remembered.
There was no hint of gentleness to his touch when he urged her legs apart. He seemed a creature of raw, unbridled passion, all trappings of civilization gone as he bent over her.
He buried himself to the hilt in one hard thrust. A choked cry escaped her lips, mingled pain and pleasure. Always when they’d made love before, he’d entered her slowly and carefully, letting her body stretch to accommodate his impressive girth. Now, his hips pistoned, driving his rock-hard shaft deeper with every thrust. She gasped for breath, her back arching under his assault, her hands fisting in the covers, holding on for dear life. She lifted her legs and clamped them around his hips. Mindless whimpers escaped her lips. The headboard banged rhythmically against the wall. Tension built in her center, a meteoric rise she tried to control. Not yet! She wasn’t ready for this to end yet!
Gray’s hands slid to the back of her knees, powerful fingers urging her to release her hold. She would have done anything he wanted at that moment. He pulled her legs forward until her ankles rested on his shoulders. The change of position awakened new sensations, and no matter how hard she tried to hold it off, orgasm seized her by the throat. Her whole body arched into the pleasure, wringing a rapturous cry from deep within. Gray roared in triumph, exploding inside her as he continued to pump.
Releasing her legs, he collapsed on top of her, his body slick with sweat, his heart thudding so loud she could hear it. Or was that was her own heart she heard? She wrapped her arms around him, burying one hand in his sweat-dampened hair as she sucked in gasps of air. There were tears on her cheeks, though she didn’t remember crying.
Gray raised his head and saw those tears drying on her cheeks. His eyes widened. “I hurt you!” he cried, his face filling with anguish.
“No!” Carolyn hastened to assure him. “It was just … powerful.”
Carefully, he pulled out of her. She bit her lip at the fiery burn between her legs, but it wasn’t an entirely unpleasant sensation. It was like he’d imprinted himself on her body, branded her as his in some primal way that should have offended her feminist sensibilities but didn’t.
For a moment, he looked torn between the alternatives of pulling his jeans back up or taking them off entirely. He glanced at her face, then made the correct decision, letting them slide to the floor and then stepping out of them, along with his shoes. Sitting up gingerly, Carolyn finished unbuttoning her shirt, then tossed it and her bra aside as Gray pulled back the covers. She started to get up so she could get into the bed, but Gray swept her into his arms and laid her down.
When he slipped into the bed beside her, she curled herself into his arms, laying her head on his chest and twining her legs with his. The drumbeat of his heart under her head soothed her raw nerves and she played absently with the sparse hair on his chest.
“Are you sure I didn’t hurt you?” he asked, his voice hoarse and tentative.
She pressed a kiss against his chest, savoring the salt of his skin. “Not in any way I feel inclined to complain about.” She folded her hands on his chest, then rested her chin on them, smiling up into his face. He’d always been a good lover, reveling in her pleasure as much as in his own. But he’d always been so terribly gentle, knowing that he was particularly well-endowed, and she was a small woman. She’d appreciated the care he took with her, but every once in a while she’d wished he would just let go of the reins. “You were magnificent,” she told him, and to her surprise he actually blushed. She laughed and laid her cheek against his chest once more.
“I was a rutting beast with not a hint of finesse, and you call that magnificent?” Laughter mellowed his voice, and she felt wrapped in a cocoon of warmth.
“There were times in the past when you were making love to me that I wished you would just fuck my brains out instead,” she admitted.
He was silent for a moment before he spoke. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
“You would have taken it as criticism, and that wasn’t how I meant it.”
“Jesus, Carolyn, was my ego really that fragile?”
She chose not to answer that one. Gray sighed and ran his fingers lightly through her hair. She practically purred with contentment. She traced his chest with her fingertips, finding a hardened nipple. She tweaked it experimentally, smiling at Gray’s sharp intake of breath. She smiled even wider when she saw how the sheets were tented below his waist.
“Would you like me to fuck your brains out again?” he growled, his fingers tightening in her hair.
Something quivered in her center like the flap of butterfly wings. She found his other nipple and flicked her tongue over it. “Yes, please,” she said as he groaned in pleasure.
Gray was happy to oblige.
MICHAEL FREEMAN HISSED IN pain, but Drake didn’t slacken his grip. He didn’t dare. The other three Guardians glared at him, newly roused fanaticism in their eyes. Michael shifted, trying no doubt to ease the pressure on his shoulder, which must be screaming in p
rotest. Drake nudged his wrist a little higher up his back, and Michael held still.
“You’ll pay for this,” Tim Carter snarled, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides.
“Yeah, yeah,” Drake said, and the blandness of his voice made the Guardians even angrier. Drake bared his own fangs, dangerously close to Michael’s throat, and the Three Musketeers refrained from charging him. “Now get your car over here.” A pedestrian passed by their little gathering, but Drake turned the mortal’s attention away from the violence before his eyes.
Carter hurried down the street to get the car and Drake eased a little of the pressure on Michael’s arm. The poor kid was shaking, from fear, from grief, from impotent fury. “I’m sorry about Thomas,” Drake said in a murmur so low only Michael could hear it. “I didn’t kill him, and don’t want to hurt you either.” Not surprisingly, Michael didn’t respond. When Carter pulled the car up to the curb, Drake motioned for the others to get in before him. After another round of resentful glares and snarls, they obeyed.
Drake couldn’t really keep his grip on Michael’s arm while getting into the car. He shifted so that his forearm pressed tightly against the Guardian’s throat. Michael instinctively reached up and grabbed at the arm that pressed against his windpipe.
“Let go,” Drake said quietly. “I can break your neck with one quick move if I want to.” Michael’s hands dropped back to his sides, and Drake maneuvered him into the car. “We’re going to Eli’s,” Drake informed Carter.
Carter met his glance in the rearview mirror. “Eli’s not going to take your side against us!”
Drake shrugged as best he could while retaining his choke hold. “Let’s go ask him, shall we?”
The car started, and Drake allowed himself to relax just a little. None of the Guardians seemed to realize that Drake was not the only vampire on the scene when they arrived, which meant Gray had a good chance of escaping. For now. But Eli’s control over his Guardians was slipping, and Drake had the sinking feeling that things were going to get worse. Much worse.