“Interesting choice,” Kaidan said.
“Trust me.”
My mouth watered at the scents of chilies and fried corn inside. One wall was painted with a mural of a Latina dancing woman, a colorful skirt flowing around her. Mariachi music was twanging overhead.
A hostess led us to a private booth with high backs and a brick archway at the end. A boy brought hot tortilla chips and a bowl of salsa.
I closed my eyes for a quick blessing and opened them to find Kaidan watching me, a chip loaded with salsa in his hand.
“Do you do that at every meal?”
“Yeah.” I took a chip and dunked it. “And every night before bed.”
We took our bites at the same time, and a second later both reached for our ice waters, eyes bulging.
“Hot!” I said, nearly sucking down the entire glass.
Kaidan laughed and wiped his forehead with his napkin. I should have known there’d be no wimpy mild stuff out here.
A waiter approached and we gave our orders.
“I didn’t see you pray either night,” Kaidan said after the man left.
“I don’t have to get on my knees or say it out loud. I just say it in my head while I lie there.”
He was contemplative as we munched on chips.
Our food came out superfast. Kaidan’s fajitas sizzled and gave off a steamy scent of cumin and sweet onion. We didn’t speak a word until we were finished, except when Kaidan said, “May I?” and skewered half of my shredded beef enchilada. When he finished, Kaidan threw his napkin down on the table in surrender.
“I promise to trust your choices from now on,” he said, stretching and patting his stomach.
I handed him the keys.
We had a great view of a snowcapped mountain range in the distance as we passed Flagstaff. There were trees again now, giant pines stretching upward.
My stomach knotted at a sign for California, and I counted down the mileage until Los Angeles. Kaidan must have noticed my crazy bouncing knee, because he attempted to distract me from my thoughts.
“You haven’t asked me any questions in ages,” he said.
“Let’s see. Okay. Basic Demonology 101. How does a demon get into a body?”
“Well, it’s difficult for two healthy souls to possess a body at once. A human soul can’t simply be shoved out of the way. I’m sure you’ve watched movies about exorcisms?”
“Heard of them, but never seen any.”
“Those stories are examples of possessions gone bad, usually some dissatisfied spirit whisperer who wants to stir up trouble. The demon soul and human soul fight over the body and the body wears down. It can get gory. Most often it ends in death.”
What a horrible way to go.
“Demons and angels both have free will, but rules still apply. Demons have been forbidden to physically harm humans, and that includes possessions. You with me so far?” I nodded, and he went on. “Dukes spend a lot of their time in hospitals and emergency rooms while they’re searching out a new body in their spirit form. When people are close to death and lose the will to live, the souls are just barely hanging on to their bodies, like a loose tooth. The Dukes can just pinch off the human soul and release it without protest, then enter the body before it dies and heal it with their powers. They heal much faster than us. They could share the bodies when the human souls are weak like that, but it hinders their powers within the body, so they prefer to be the only dwellers.”
“How do they decide who to pick?” I asked.
“That’s where it can get tricky. They seek out low-profile young or middle-aged people, preferably someone who isn’t surrounded by a big, doting family. It’s too much effort if there are humans who will search when the person disappears. Some Dukes want attractive bodies; some want to appear rougher. It can take a while to find a perfect match, but time doesn’t matter to them. Besides, the Dukes enjoy having an opportunity to whisper to humans while they’re hunting and waiting. A hospital is a perfect place to work, because emotions are already running high.”
“That’s disgusting,” I muttered.
“As far as life span,” he continued, “normal humans can live upward of one hundred and twenty years these days, but their life expectancy is lower because of health-related issues. Dukes and Neph don’t have those problems, so our bodies can make it that long. We’re not immune to aging, though. A body wears out, no matter how healthy it is. Dukes discard their bodies before they get to that point. Then it’s on to the next body and building a new false identity.”
“What happens when they leave the bodies?” I envisioned zombies.
“If no other soul was inhabiting it, the body appears to die of cardiac arrest.”
“Ah. I’ve been wondering about Nephilim souls. Are our souls half demon?”
Kaidan’s mouth lifted. “The questions you ask remind me of when I was a child. I asked the very same ones of my father.”
I tried to imagine young, inquisitive Kaidan looking up at the demon in his life, desperate for his attention. I wished I could hold that little boy.
“No,” he answered, “our souls are neither human nor demon. We Neph have our own unique souls, but as children of dark angels our souls are marked with demonic stains.”
I did not like the sound of that.
“I guess in your case you’ve got a bleached-out angel patch there, too,” he added.
Funny.
“There’s something else I’m confused about,” I said. “If I had a baby someday, would the childbirth kill me?”
“Yes, it would. Why? Are you thinking of conceiving?”
I gave his arm a little shove and he grinned, but he got serious again before answering.
“I’m not certain why, but nobody survives.”
I thought of my mother’s singing, and her love for me inside of her. She must have known she wouldn’t live to hold me, and yet she exuded pure joy.
“Were you able to sense your mother’s feelings when she was pregnant with you?” I asked him.
“Yes, I suppose because we were sharing a life source. I could sense moments of affection directed at me, even brief glimpses of love, but mostly she despaired. No doubt she was suffering from obsession with my father, but he saw her only as a vessel for his use. She was chosen for her beauty, and physical characteristics in her family that complemented his. When I was very small I asked him what happened to her and he said, ‘You killed her—shame, too. She was nice to look at.’”
He brought a hand up and ran his fingers through his hair, blocking my view of his face so I couldn’t see any hint of emotion that might have been there. I had a violent image of kicking Kaidan’s father in his prized lust parts. He cleared his throat and began again.
“My father has had one child in each life, all trained in music and manners, and highly educated.”
He stated the facts without any interest.
“Are any of them still living?”
“No.”
“You might have relatives out there. Maybe I do, too!”
“No, we don’t. Don’t get excited. There are no descendants.”
“Why not?” I asked.
“The details aren’t important.”
“They’re important to me.”
“Please, Ann, not right now. I’ll tell you everything later, just not right now. I’m not in the mood for your tears. It’s been a nice day.”
I didn’t want to be protected through ignorance. I hated that he thought I would cry, and hated even more that he was probably right. Kaidan pointed out the window at a sign. We were entering California.
I took a deep breath. I would go to the prison tomorrow and meet another of Lucifer’s Dukes. My own father.
What was the worst that could happen? If I prepared myself, then maybe it wouldn’t hurt as badly. He could refuse to see me. He could see me, but be hateful and rude and tell me never to come back. No matter what, I would be okay. I didn’t need him, I told myself. I needed inform
ation from him, yes. But I had Patti to give me love.
“Can I use your phone?” I asked.
He handed it to me, and I took out the paper with the number to the convent. A woman answered after three rings.
“Convent of Our Mother Mary, this is Sister Emily speaking.”
“Hello, Sister Emily, my name is Anna Whitt—”
“Ah, yes. Sister Ruth has been waiting for you, and try as I may, she will not relay a message of any sort. She insists on seeing you.”
Hope bubbled up inside me.
“That’s why I’m calling. I’m in California now. I want to come see her right away.”
“Unfortunately Sister Ruth has been in a comatose state for over twenty-four hours now. This isn’t the first time. She’s pulled herself out of it before, so we can only hope she’ll do it again.”
“Do you think maybe I can just come and sit with her?”
“Dear, we have someone sitting with her around the clock. Why don’t you give me a number where I can contact you, and I’ll let you know the moment she comes to—that is, if it’s okay with you.”
“Yes, please,” I said. “Please call me the very second she wakes up; I don’t care if it’s the middle of the night.”
I closed my eyes after hanging up. Please don’t let her die yet.
“I’m curious about something,” Kaidan said.
“Yes?”
“Do you even feel the full temptations of sin, or are you just extremely self-controlled? Because even when I’ve seen you feeling dark emotions, it’s so brief.”
I thought about it. “Of course I feel temptation, but I’m really aware of it, so I can sort of squash most of the urges before they have time to register. Rules are meant to protect us, so I follow them. Something might feel good at the moment, but the consequences are scary.” I paused. “That sounds lame, doesn’t it?”
“Just... fascinating, is all. Have you never outright sinned, then?”
“I disobeyed Patti when she told me to stay away from you.”
“Right. I remember that one. So just once, then?”
“There was this other time....” I thought about the two girls in the bathroom and stopped myself, blanching.
“Yes? Go on,” he urged.
He watched the road, but excitement underscored his tone. I rubbed my dampening palms down my shorts.
“The night we met, I sort of... well, I flat-out told a lie. On purpose.”
I thought he was trying not to smile.
“To me?” he asked.
“No. About you.”
Now he unleashed that devastating smile of his, crinkling the corners of his eyes. My face was aflame.
“Continue. Please.”
“There were these girls in the bathroom talking about you, and for some reason, I don’t know why, it upset me, and I told them... thatyouhadanSTD.”
I covered my face in shame and he burst into laughter. I thought he might drive off the road.
Well, it was kind of funny in an ironic way, because he couldn’t keep a disease anyhow, even if he had gotten one. I found myself beginning to giggle, too, mostly out of relief that he wasn’t offended.
“I wondered if you were ever going to tell me!” he said through spurts of hilarity.
Duh! Of course he’d been listening! My giggles increased, and it felt so nice that we kept going until we were cracking up. It was the good kind of laughter: the soul-cleansing, ab-crunching, lose-control-of-yourself kind.
We started catching our breath again a few minutes later, only to break into another round of merriment.
“Do you forgive me, then?” I asked when we finally settled down and I wiped my eyes.
“Yes, yes. I’ve had worse said about me.”
We passed a billboard advertising gin. It made me think of Jay.
“Hey, remember when you said the Dukes have power to persuade people?” I asked. “Do we have those powers, too?”
“We call it the influence,” he said. “And no, it’s only the Dukes. Why?”
“There were a few times when it seemed like I mentally persuaded Jay not to drink, but I guess not.”
“No. Dukes have the ability to put an urge into a person by speaking a command out loud or even silently. But just like the whisperers, they can’t force it. The influence doesn’t work if the human is really strong and adamant against what the Duke tells them to do. It works best if the person is already inclined to go in that direction, but they’re sort of teetering on the edge of a decision.”
We watched the road now. I looked at Kaidan’s hand on the steering wheel, and just for fun I said in my mind, Tap your finger on the wheel.
Tap, tap. Oh, my gosh! He did it! I tried it again, and this time when he tapped the wheel I tittered. He didn’t even notice he was doing it.
“What’s up with you?” he asked.
“Are you sure it’s not possible for a Nephilim to have the influence?”
“I’ve never heard of anyone having it except a Duke, and trust me, I’ve tried. It doesn’t work.”
For twenty minutes Kaidan would periodically chuckle under his breath and shake his head. I kept grinning, too.
We were less than two hours away now.
“I know we’re going to be there soon, but I really need to go to the bathroom,” I said.
“Oh, all right. Loo stop.” He took the next exit and we both went into a convenience store. When I came out I saw the back of Kaidan as he was walking to the exit doors. I had a sudden urge to try my power of influence again.
Spin around! I willed to his back. And to my utter disbelief, he spun midstride and then put his hand on the door handle to open it. He paused there for a moment, and then turned and looked at me with an incredulous, wide-eyed expression. I darted into the candy aisle and bent over laughing.
“Oooh, so not funny,” I heard him say as the bell chimed his exit.
I couldn’t stand straight as I made my way back to his car, holding my sides and cracking up, no matter how hard I tried to keep a straight face. He gave me a fake glare and shook his head when I climbed in.
“How did you do that?” he demanded.
“I don’t know. Just like you said, I gave you a silent command and willed it to happen. You weren’t really thinking about it, so I guess you went with it.”
He continued to shake his head.
“I can’t believe it. Maybe you’re more powerful because you’ve got the double-angel parentage. That’s completely unfair.”
“Ha, ha,” I teased.
On our way back onto the interstate we passed a long row of stores and shops, and a giant tattoo parlor.
“I had a tattoo once,” said Kaidan. “Last year, just before we left England.”
“What do you mean, you had one ‘once’?”
“Bloody thing was gone by the morning!” His voice was indignant. “Sheets were black with ink. I put myself through all of that for hours, and my body just pushed it back out!”
And once again we were both in a fit of hysterics, sharing the world’s best inside joke. We were doubled over, unable to breathe, and I accidentally snorted. Kaidan pointed at me and laughed harder, clutching his stomach.
“What was your tattoo?” I managed to push the words out.
“You had to ask. It was a deadly-looking pair of black wings on my shoulder blades.”
Kaidan and I started roaring again, muscles clenching from the exertion.
We had no way of knowing it would be our last reason to laugh for a very long time.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
THE GREAT PURGE
We made our way through the dry hills and valleys of Southern California, passing neighborhoods of homes with rounded red tiles on the roofs, and manicured lawns. By nightfall we were outside of Los Angeles. I kept checking Kaidan’s phone for calls from the convent, but there was nothing.
“It’s still early,” Kaidan said. “Let’s drive through L.A. or Hollywood. We’re close enough.??
?
“Hollywood!” I wasn’t up-to-date on celebrity gossip, but it sounded exciting, and I wasn’t ready to settle down yet.
We were focusing on road signs when I happened to notice writing on a small mountain.
“Oh, my gosh, Kai, look! The Hollywood sign!” I bounced in my seat and pointed to the giant white capital letters standing on the mountainside. His head tilted to the side, peering at me.
“You called me Kai.”
“Sorry,” I said.
“No, it’s okay. That’s what my friends call me.”
“Your friends?” I asked.
“As close as I have to friends, yes. Four Neph. Two I’ve known since childhood, although I’m not particularly close with any of them. It’s more like we’re all in it together.”
“Will I get to meet them?”
“I don’t know. I’m not going to tell them about you, because I think you need to lie low. But that doesn’t mean they won’t hear about you through word of mouth. The Dukes and demons are worse than a bunch of gossiping old women.” That was a funny image.
“What are your friends like?”
“Well, there’s Blake, the son of the Duke of Envy. He lives out here on one of the beaches. He was born in the Philippines. His job is the best, because all he has to do is get his hands on the latest material things and date the most beautiful women. I’ve wondered if he even feels a pull to sin. He’s completely mellow. I’ve seen him jealous only once, and it got ugly.”
“What was he jealous about?”
“A girl he liked was chatting up another bloke. Anyhow, he’s a thrill seeker. Likes all the extreme sports. He travels the world to surf. He’s got freakishly good balance. And then there are the twins, Marna and Ginger.” His voice went a little sour as he spoke of them. “Daughters of the Duke of Adultery, Astaroth. They’re dancers. I spent a good bit of my childhood with them, sharing tutors and whatnot. They still live in London. Marna can be a joy, but Ginger has not been pleasant for quite some time.”
“Are they expected to break up marriages?” I asked.