“Adria, I—”
“If Aramei’s able,” I interrupt, finally meeting Eva’s eyes, “I’m going back in.”
Reluctantly, Eva nods and gives in to me, but there’s no absence of disquiet in her face.
Eva pushes herself back into a stand and wrings out the cloth that always sits on the table next to Aramei’s bed and she goes to clean my face. I let her. I lay still on my back as the cool cloth moves across my forehead first to wipe away the sweat, and then around my mouth. I shut my eyes and take in the comfort of the cloth, feeling my suffocated pores opening up to the coolness of it. After lying here for a moment longer, I pull myself up and lay next to Aramei again. I comb her hair with my fingers and stare down into her angelic, sleeping face. I never say a word. I can’t. I can never possibly describe to anyone how much I feel for her, because no one would understand. Not even Isaac. But my journeys into her past, although few, have brought me closer to her than even her own sister had been. Because I feel her emotions, because I am right there with her, experiencing everything that she sees and hears and tastes and smells and touches. It’s as if we are sisters, but share so much more with each other than anyone can possibly know.
And I’ve become addicted to her, to traveling into her past and living her life through her eyes. And I truly want to help her. I know better than anyone her pain and life. I could’ve been her. I keep saying that to myself over and over: I could’ve been her.
But she never had a choice. She never even had a chance. Not like I did. Infecting her very likely would not have turned out the same as me. I don’t doubt for a second that Aramei would’ve died and that’s why Trajan never risked it.
Aramei knows that I’m right there with her in these visions. She wants me here and she needs me to help her, though I still have yet to understand what for.
I have to know. And soon. Because her emotions are killing me.
Eva leaves us again without me having to ask her to go. I barely hear her when she quietly makes her exit after cleaning the floor where I had my little accident. I keep my eyes on Aramei the whole time, unable to tear my gaze away. And now I stroke her face again with my fingers and whisper softly near her mouth, “I know you can show me more.”
I can feel her steady breaths on my lips. Her eyes don’t flutter and she doesn’t move any muscle in her face to indicate that she can hear me, but I give her time. I lay with her for nearly an hour before she shows signs of being ‘coherent’ again.
And when I feel her breath quicken, I’m only given seconds before I’m thrust into her world again…and again.
~~~
Much later, I open my eyes to see Trajan standing over me, but I can’t make out where I am at first. I realize that I’m naked, sitting upright in a deep bathtub with Eva sitting beside me on the edge of the porcelain. Panicking, I lurch forward to cover my nakedness with my arms, pulling my bare knees briskly toward me and pressing them against my chest. A great gush of water rolls over the top of the tub and onto the floor.
“No,” Eva says gently, putting out her hand as if to calm me, “you are safe.” She smiles down at me. “Forgive me, but I couldn’t get you to wake up, so I thought getting you into the water might help.”
With my arms pressed tightly across my breasts, I jerk all around every which way to find my clothes or a towel, anything to cover myself with. I see that this tub is an old-timey standalone claw-foot situated away from any walls. Away from anything I could put around my body.
“What are you doing in here?” I snap at Trajan, my eyes full of resentment glaring across at him. At the same time I’m thinking: What am I doing in here? Because Eva’s explanation really hasn’t sunk in yet.
Trajan is unfazed by me. He stands over me with his hands folded together behind him. No emotions in his face. Just the same domineering look he always has when he expects information from me. I know he could care less that I’m naked and that I’m clearly pissed off that he’s invading my privacy, but it doesn’t stop me from being openly irate about it.
“Do you mind?!” I shriek.
“Tell me what you saw,” he says simply, completely ignoring my anger.
“Look,” I growl at him, “I draw the line right here! You force me to help you, threaten me and threaten Isaac—you have no boundaries! The least you could do is show a little respect! I don’t care who you are!”
Trajan moves so fast towards me that I don’t have time to blink. My naked body is pushed down against the side of the tub and I thrash about, splashing the water out all around me as I gasp to fill my lungs with air again. A thunderous boom resonates through my head as the back of my skull is rammed against the porcelain and a thousand black and yellow spots flutter around in my vision. I feel Trajan’s powerful hand around my throat, his thick fingers squeezing my muscles with just enough force to terrify me into total submission.
I’ve gone too far. And I knew that I had before the last word even escaped my lips.
I despise him, but at the same time I can’t help but respect him because of what he is. He’s not human and for me ever to think that I could treat someone with his power, someone of his kind with the same defiant nature as a human, I admit I’m one stupid girl for it.
Trajan only releases his grip when he feels my body give in to him. My hands slowly slide away from his wrist where his own hand is around my throat. I stop thrashing and gasping and my silence leaves only the sound of water trickling onto the floor. His fingers slide away from my neck and he slowly raises his body, but his dark, piercing eyes never leave mine. I see Eva from the corner of my eye as she stands against the wall; indifferent on the outside, but I see in her face, total dismay.
Finally, I look away from Trajan and down at the water rippling beneath me with all of my subtle movements.
“I’m sorry,” I say and raise my eyes to him again. “Not because I’m afraid of you, but because I’m not.” Curiosity sparks in his eyes, almost unnoticeable, but I catch it.
I go on, “But it doesn’t mean I don’t respect you…and…,” I look across at Eva and finish, “…I’m not like Viktor Vargas. I can hate you without losing my dignity.”
It seems that my willingness to accept his authority, even with defiance in my words, is all I needed to gain his respect. He gives me a single nod of sanction and says, “I will be waiting for you in the main room. Do not keep me waiting.” And he turns and leaves me alone with Eva in the downstairs bathroom.
Silence fills the room for a moment and we just look at each other. Maybe she’s trying to figure out what to say the same as I am, but then she smiles and walks over to me with a thick black bathrobe.
“You cannot go under for that long again,” she says, holding the robe open for me and I rise from the water and step out, slipping into the fabric. “It’s very dangerous, you must understand. You risk never coming back out.”
I tighten the rope around my waist and look at her.
“How do you know this?”
She’s hesitant at first, glancing downward at the floor. “We shouldn’t keep Milord waiting.”
Eva points to my clothing on the pedestal sink and then slips out of the room, ignoring my question.
I get dressed slowly, but not to intentionally keep Trajan waiting. I can’t help it that every movement I make is dictated by deep thoughts. My head is overloaded with a lot of everything, so much that I can’t focus on one thought alone long enough to actually remember it a second later when the next one comes around. I bring up my hands, my fingers spread in a claw-grip and I clutch my head on both sides, my eyes squinting as if trying to force down all of these thoughts into a place where they can be controlled. I move my hands from my head and brace my palms against the wooden wall and just lean forward. My head drops and I stare down at the floor.
After I feel I’ve kept Trajan waiting long enough, I take in a deep breath and leave the spacious bathroom.
He and Eva are waiting for me; Trajan is sitting comfortably on
the couch with Eva standing against the wall nearby in all of her gentleness and servitude. And her secrets, which I will not ignore forever. All of the servants have already been told to leave. I know Aramei is sleeping soundly upstairs; I can hear her soft breathing and only wish that I could be there with her, instead of down here staring into the face of my undoing.
And just like the last time, I tell Trajan everything that I saw and experienced. I hold back nothing. I learn during our conversation what I already suspected: Viktor had been trying to get Aramei out of the area because the war between his army and Trajan’s was spreading fast and soon to engulf all of Serbia. Viktor’s rebellion had just started months before to infect locals, to bring more to his side so that he could eventually overthrow Trajan and claim his throne. Because Viktor knew he could never defeat Trajan on his own, nor could he defeat him with such a small army. Viktor’s actions were limitless and within a couple short months, there were so many rogue werewolves under his command that the humans who had not yet been infected were terrified to leave their homes. Rumors of the Old Myths being true had started to spread as fast as Viktor’s growing numbers. Villages days from the carnage heard of the rumors of the Black Beasts who were spreading through the countryside.
But I also learned something I never expected.
Nataša, after Viktor went rogue was made Trajan’s Right Hand in place of Viktor. But Nataša had always been crafty and vindictive. She had been spying on Viktor and all of the time that he spent with Aramei, she had been watching from the shadows. Viktor never detected her presence because his infatuation with Aramei blinded his senses, but every encounter that Viktor had with Aramei was being watched with vengeful eyes.
To become involved with a human the way that Viktor was with Aramei was not only against their laws; it was against their nature and Nataša was the most unforgiving of all. She had always hated humans and because Viktor had become infatuated with a human, Nataša would be the one to set in motion the plan to bring about Aramei’s death.
I leave the cabin with more information than I ever thought I’d have. And I start to see now more than ever how the pieces of so many mysteries are quickly coming together.
~~~
“Why do you serve him?” I say to Raul sitting in the driver’s seat of a black SUV. Isaac had to go to Augusta and deal with another challenge made by a werewolf who apparently wants control of the Maine territory. I, knowing the nature and the importance of these types of challenges, understand that Isaac had to leave and deal with it.
I was still under with Aramei when Isaac left.
Now, Raul has been appointed my chauffer and is taking me back to Hallowell. It could’ve been worse; I’m happy I didn’t get stuck on a long drive with Trajan as my company. I like Raul and Isaac trusts him, and so do I. I’m pretty sure Isaac had words with Raul before he left about watching over me.
“He is the Sovereign,” Raul answers, glancing over at me. His enormous, muscled arms look awkward out ahead of what appears to be a tiny steering wheel; his giant hands grip the wheel on each side. I’m surprised he can fit in the seat.
“He is a bastard,” I say.
If this were any guard other than Raul, I likely would not have said that out loud.
“I know,” Raul says and it stuns me.
I turn my head to look at him.
“To be Vukašin doesn’t mean for a goddamned second that anybody has to like you.” He laughs a deep, rumbling laugh. “Someone like him has more enemies than friends.”
“I can’t imagine him having any friends,” I say, looking out the windshield now.
It’s late in the afternoon and the sun will be setting soon.
“Nah,” Raul says, “he doesn’t, but that’s best being in his position. There are no such things as friends in his case.”
“Well, serves him right.”
“Other than their fear of him,” Raul says, “he associates with no one by his own choice. If I were the Sovereign, I would befriend no one just the same. Too risky.”
“Oh, so you’d shun me?” I cross my arms and scrunch up my nose looking over at him, trying to lessen the bleakness of the conversation.
I’ve had enough of bleak.
A giant grin etches across Raul’s big face and he wriggles his bushy brows at me. “Oh, no ma’am! You’d be my only friend.” Then a sneaky look appears and he adds, “I’d let you be anything to me that you wanted.”
Even Raul knows that I’d never give him the time of day, but I’d also never dream of not going along with his innocent teasing, either. I love me some Big Raul.
“Yeah, yeah,” I say, “you couldn’t afford me.”
Raul throws his head back against the seat and laughs.
“Baby, after one night with me, I wouldn’t be able to get rid of you!”
I laugh right along with him, never uncomfortable with his sexual comments. The truth is that I don’t think I ever could be. He’s totally harmless.
The sun has set by the time Raul drops me off outside at the Mayfair house.
“You be careful on the drive back, Raul,” I say standing outside at the driver’s side window.
He draws his square-shaped chin in a circular motion, looking out at me with an awkward, thoughtful expression. “Well, thanks for your concern.” I realize that Raul may have never really experienced a genuine human gesture of concern like that before. I can see all over his face that he’s contemplating it and his smile seems to deepen.
“Thanks for the ride,” I say, pat him on the shoulder and head toward the front porch.
Raul drives away and in no time I hear the big tires on the SUV braking over the little pebbles at the very end of the driveway.
I step up onto the first concrete step but then halt in my tracks.
Something’s not right…
All of my senses have suddenly gone into overdrive. The tiny hairs on my arms rise and the back of my neck all the way down my spine prickles with alarm. My eyes shift black out of nowhere and it completely shocks me because I’ve only ever known it to happen in times of rage or lust, not when I have no idea what’s going on, or which emotions to act upon. I take a deep breath, close my eyes and calm myself, letting the blackness fade. And then I open up my ears to the sounds inside the house. There are voices in the den that are muffled by grave whispers, a flurry of words that I can’t make out because they are all talking at the same time: “…to kill her,” I hear one voice say. “Where is Isaac?” and then another, “…maybe she’s a spy.” And the last one I hear says, “Hope she’s still in the cabin,” which causes me to burst inside the house to find out what’s going on.
I walk quickly into the den and all of the whispers cease in an instant; more than a dozen pairs of eyes are looking across the vast room at me.
“What’s going on?” I say; my eyes jerk around in every direction searching for some sign.
Isaac’s sister, Camilla, and Zia both walk toward me. Zia’s smoky gray eyes peer at me solemnly. She steps up in front of me and whispers, “Rachel caught someone snooping around the woods behind the house.” She glances toward the hallway which leads into the kitchen. “They’ve got her in the basement and they’ve been more or less beating the shit out of her for information for the past hour.”
“Really?” I say, my eyebrows knotted. I look toward the kitchen briefly and then back to Zia because I sense she’s not exactly telling me everything.
Then Zia leans in even closer to my ear and says, “I think she could be that Praverian you guys have been looking for.”
I gasp and my face freezes in all of its stunned glory. As Zia’s face gradually moves away from mine, all that I can move are my eyes to follow her. I feel like I’m trapped inside my own body and have lost my ability to control any part of it.
Oh my God, she said it. She said Praverian. At least I know now that she’s not the traitor, but how did she know?
I look down at my shoes and then out at all of the eyes pe
ering back at us, Camilla standing just a few feet behind Zia. Not one of these faces can look at me fully. It’s as if every time I make eye contact, their glances stray away from mine.
I grab Zia by the elbow and pull her into the dimly lit hallway.
“How did you know about the Praverian?” I whisper harshly through my teeth. I can’t help but continuously glance down the hallway in both directions to see if anyone might be in earshot.
I still haven’t let go of her elbow.
“Girl, you can’t hide stuff from me,” Zia says, grinning. “Don’t you know that by now?”
“Tell me how you know,” I say and I’m not smiling. I don’t give in to her natural humor. Not yet. My eyes are wide and focused as I stare intently at her.
Finally, Zia pulls her elbow gently from my hand.
“Chill the hell out, Adria,” she says. “Look, I don’t like being left in the dark and I knew that for you to keep secrets from me that it must’ve been something really serious. So, I did what any nosey girl would do and I listened in on a conversation between you and Isaac—.” She grins deeply and adds, “I guess you thought I was still in Augusta with Sebastian that night, but we came home early.”
I’m not liking where this might be going. I rip through my mind, trying to figure out what night she’s talking about and what Isaac and me might’ve said.
“Well, what did you hear?” I say, still showing trepidation about her knowing anything at all and she’s starting to take offense to it.
The grin disappears from her face and she looks at me confused and maybe even a little snubbed. “Just something about a Praverian being a traitor—I don’t know why you never let me in on it and I won’t lie and say it doesn’t bug the shit out of me, but come on, I know now. What’s with the paranoia?”
The ‘paranoia’ is anyone else other than those who already know being aware of what Harry is. It’s too risky, even for one more person to be let in on the secret. We have gone to great lengths to protect Harry’s secret because if the Dark Praverian gets wind of what he is, he’s as good as dead. We can’t afford even those closest to us knowing. All it takes is one person, one slipup and this whole plan will fall apart.