Chapter viii.
What passed between Jones and old Mr Nightingale; with the arrival ofa person not yet mentioned in this history.
Notwithstanding the sentiment of the Roman satirist, which denies thedivinity of fortune, and the opinion of Seneca to the same purpose;Cicero, who was, I believe, a wiser man than either of them, expresslyholds the contrary; and certain it is, there are some incidents inlife so very strange and unaccountable, that it seems to require morethan human skill and foresight in producing them.
Of this kind was what now happened to Jones, who found Mr Nightingalethe elder in so critical a minute, that Fortune, if she was reallyworthy all the worship she received at Rome, could not have contrivedsuch another. In short, the old gentleman, and the father of the younglady whom he intended for his son, had been hard at it for many hours;and the latter was just now gone, and had left the former delightedwith the thoughts that he had succeeded in a long contention, whichhad been between the two fathers of the future bride and bridegroom;in which both endeavoured to overreach the other, and, as it notrarely happens in such cases, both had retreated fully satisfied ofhaving obtained the victory.
This gentleman, whom Mr Jones now visited, was what they call a man ofthe world; that is to say, a man who directs his conduct in this worldas one who, being fully persuaded there is no other, is resolved tomake the most of this. In his early years he had been bred to trade;but, having acquired a very good fortune, he had lately declined hisbusiness; or, to speak more properly, had changed it from dealing ingoods, to dealing only in money, of which he had always a plentifulfund at command, and of which he knew very well how to make a veryplentiful advantage, sometimes of the necessities of private men, andsometimes of those of the public. He had indeed conversed so entirelywith money, that it may be almost doubted whether he imagined therewas any other thing really existing in the world; this at least may becertainly averred, that he firmly believed nothing else to have anyreal value.
The reader will, I fancy, allow that Fortune could not have culled outa more improper person for Mr Jones to attack with any probability ofsuccess; nor could the whimsical lady have directed this attack at amore unseasonable time.
As money then was always uppermost in this gentleman's thoughts, sothe moment he saw a stranger within his doors it immediately occurredto his imagination, that such stranger was either come to bring himmoney, or to fetch it from him. And according as one or other of thesethoughts prevailed, he conceived a favourable or unfavourable idea ofthe person who approached him.
Unluckily for Jones, the latter of these was the ascendant at present;for as a young gentleman had visited him the day before, with a billfrom his son for a play debt, he apprehended, at the first sight ofJones, that he was come on such another errand. Jones therefore had nosooner told him that he was come on his son's account than the oldgentleman, being confirmed in his suspicion, burst forth into anexclamation, "That he would lose his labour." "Is it then possible,sir," answered Jones, "that you can guess my business?" "If I do guessit," replied the other, "I repeat again to you, you will lose yourlabour. What, I suppose you are one of those sparks who lead my soninto all those scenes of riot and debauchery, which will be hisdestruction? but I shall pay no more of his bills, I promise you. Iexpect he will quit all such company for the future. If I had imaginedotherwise, I should not have provided a wife for him; for I would beinstrumental in the ruin of nobody." "How, sir," said Jones, "and wasthis lady of your providing?" "Pray, sir," answered the old gentleman,"how comes it to be any concern of yours?"--"Nay, dear sir," repliedJones, "be not offended that I interest myself in what regards yourson's happiness, for whom I have so great an honour and value. It wasupon that very account I came to wait upon you. I can't express thesatisfaction you have given me by what you say; for I do assure youyour son is a person for whom I have the highest honour.--Nay, sir, itis not easy to express the esteem I have for you; who could be sogenerous, so good, so kind, so indulgent to provide such a match foryour son; a woman, who, I dare swear, will make him one of thehappiest men upon earth."
There is scarce anything which so happily introduces men to our goodliking, as having conceived some alarm at their first appearance; whenonce those apprehensions begin to vanish we soon forget the fearswhich they occasioned, and look on ourselves as indebted for ourpresent ease to those very persons who at first raised our fears.
Thus it happened to Nightingale, who no sooner found that Jones had nodemand on him, as he suspected, than he began to be pleased with hispresence. "Pray, good sir," said he, "be pleased to sit down. I do notremember to have ever had the pleasure of seeing you before; but ifyou are a friend of my son, and have anything to say concerning thisyoung lady, I shall be glad to hear you. As to her making him happy,it will be his own fault if she doth not. I have discharged my duty,in taking care of the main article. She will bring him a fortunecapable of making any reasonable, prudent, sober man, happy.""Undoubtedly," cries Jones, "for she is in herself a fortune; sobeautiful, so genteel, so sweet-tempered, and so well-educated; she isindeed a most accomplished young lady; sings admirably well, and hatha most delicate hand at the harpsichord." "I did not know any of thesematters," answered the old gentleman, "for I never saw the lady: but Ido not like her the worse for what you tell me; and I am the betterpleased with her father for not laying any stress on thesequalifications in our bargain. I shall always think it a proof of hisunderstanding. A silly fellow would have brought in these articles asan addition to her fortune; but, to give him his due, he nevermentioned any such matter; though to be sure they are nodisparagements to a woman." "I do assure you, sir," cries Jones, "shehath them all in the most eminent degree: for my part, I own I wasafraid you might have been a little backward, a little less inclinedto the match; for your son told me you had never seen the lady;therefore I came, sir, in that case, to entreat you, to conjure you,as you value the happiness of your son, not to be averse to his matchwith a woman who hath not only all the good qualities I havementioned, but many more."--"If that was your business, sir," said theold gentleman, "we are both obliged to you; and you may be perfectlyeasy; for I give you my word I was very well satisfied with herfortune." "Sir," answered Jones, "I honour you every moment more andmore. To be so easily satisfied, so very moderate on that account, isa proof of the soundness of your understanding, as well as thenobleness of your mind."----"Not so very moderate, young gentleman,not so very moderate," answered the father.--"Still more and morenoble," replied Jones; "and give me leave to add, sensible: for sureit is little less than madness to consider money as the solefoundation of happiness. Such a woman as this with her little, hernothing of a fortune"--"I find," cries the old gentleman, "you have apretty just opinion of money, my friend, or else you are betteracquainted with the person of the lady than with her circumstances.Why, pray, what fortune do you imagine this lady to have?" "Whatfortune?" cries Jones, "why, too contemptible a one to be named foryour son."--"Well, well, well," said the other, "perhaps he might havedone better."--"That I deny," said Jones, "for she is one of the bestof women."--"Ay, ay, but in point of fortune I mean," answered theother. "And yet, as to that now, how much do you imagine your friendis to have?"--"How much?" cries Jones, "how much? Why, at the utmost,perhaps L200." "Do you mean to banter me, young gentleman?" said thefather, a little angry. "No, upon my soul," answered Jones, "I am inearnest: nay, I believe I have gone to the utmost farthing. If I dothe lady an injury, I ask her pardon." "Indeed you do," cries thefather; "I am certain she hath fifty times that sum, and she shallproduce fifty to that before I consent that she shall marry my son.""Nay," said Jones, "it is too late to talk of consent now; if she hadnot fifty farthings your son is married."--"My son married!" answeredthe old gentleman, with surprize. "Nay," said Jones, "I thought youwas unacquainted with it." "My son married to Miss Harris!" answeredhe again. "To Miss Harris!" said Jones; "no, sir; to Miss NancyMiller, the daughter of Mrs Miller, at whose house he lodged; a younglady, who, though her mother is reduced to
let lodgings--"--"Are youbantering, or are you in earnest?" cries the father, with a mostsolemn voice. "Indeed, sir," answered Jones, "I scorn the character ofa banterer. I came to you in most serious earnest, imagining, as Ifind true, that your son had never dared acquaint you with a match somuch inferior to him in point of fortune, though the reputation of thelady will suffer it no longer to remain a secret."
While the father stood like one struck suddenly dumb at this news, agentleman came into the room, and saluted him by the name of brother.
But though these two were in consanguinity so nearly related, theywere in their dispositions almost the opposites to each other. Thebrother who now arrived had likewise been bred to trade, in which heno sooner saw himself worth L6000 than he purchased a small estatewith the greatest part of it, and retired into the country; where hemarried the daughter of an unbeneficed clergyman; a young lady, who,though she had neither beauty nor fortune, had recommended herself tohis choice entirely by her good humour, of which she possessed a verylarge share.
With this woman he had, during twenty-five years, lived a life moreresembling the model which certain poets ascribe to the golden age,than any of those patterns which are furnished by the present times.By her he had four children, but none of them arrived at maturity,except only one daughter, whom, in vulgar language, he and his wifehad spoiled; that is, had educated with the utmost tenderness andfondness, which she returned to such a degree, that she had actuallyrefused a very extraordinary match with a gentleman a little turned offorty, because she could not bring herself to part with her parents.
The young lady whom Mr Nightingale had intended for his son was a nearneighbour of his brother, and an acquaintance of his niece; and inreality it was upon the account of his projected match that he was nowcome to town; not, indeed, to forward, but to dissuade his brotherfrom a purpose which he conceived would inevitably ruin his nephew;for he foresaw no other event from a union with Miss Harris,notwithstanding the largeness of her fortune, as neither her personnor mind seemed to him to promise any kind of matrimonial felicity:for she was very tall, very thin, very ugly, very affected, verysilly, and very ill-natured.
His brother, therefore, no sooner mentioned the marriage of his nephewwith Miss Miller, than he exprest the utmost satisfaction; and whenthe father had very bitterly reviled his son, and pronounced sentenceof beggary upon him, the uncle began in the following manner:
"If you was a little cooler, brother, I would ask you whether you loveyour son for his sake or for your own. You would answer, I suppose,and so I suppose you think, for his sake; and doubtless it is hishappiness which you intended in the marriage you proposed for him.
"Now, brother, to prescribe rules of happiness to others hath alwaysappeared to me very absurd, and to insist on doing this, verytyrannical. It is a vulgar error, I know; but it is, nevertheless, anerror. And if this be absurd in other things, it is mostly so in theaffair of marriage, the happiness of which depends entirely on theaffection which subsists between the parties.
"I have therefore always thought it unreasonable in parents to desireto chuse for their children on this occasion; since to force affectionis an impossible attempt; nay, so much doth love abhor force, that Iknow not whether, through an unfortunate but uncurable perverseness inour natures, it may not be even impatient of persuasion.
"It is, however, true that, though a parent will not, I think, wiselyprescribe, he ought to be consulted on this occasion; and, instrictness, perhaps, should at least have a negative voice. My nephew,therefore, I own, in marrying, without asking your advice, hath beenguilty of a fault. But, honestly speaking, brother, have you not alittle promoted this fault? Have not your frequent declarations onthis subject given him a moral certainty of your refusal, where therewas any deficiency in point of fortune? Nay, doth not your presentanger arise solely from that deficiency? And if he hath failed in hisduty here, did you not as much exceed that authority when youabsolutely bargained with him for a woman, without his knowledge, whomyou yourself never saw, and whom, if you had seen and known as well asI, it must have been madness in you to have ever thought of bringingher into your family?
"Still I own my nephew in a fault; but surely it is not anunpardonable fault. He hath acted indeed without your consent, in amatter in which he ought to have asked it, but it is in a matter inwhich his interest is principally concerned; you yourself must andwill acknowledge that you consulted his interest only, and if heunfortunately differed from you, and hath been mistaken in his notionof happiness, will you, brother, if you love your son, carry him stillwider from the point? Will you increase the ill consequences of hissimple choice? Will you endeavour to make an event certain misery tohim, which may accidentally prove so? In a word, brother, because hehath put it out of your power to make his circumstances as affluent asyou would, will you distress them as much as you can?"
By the force of the true Catholic faith St Anthony won upon thefishes. Orpheus and Amphion went a little farther, and by the charmsof music enchanted things merely inanimate. Wonderful, both! butneither history nor fable have ever yet ventured to record an instanceof any one, who, by force of argument and reason, hath triumphed overhabitual avarice.
Mr Nightingale, the father, instead of attempting to answer hisbrother, contented himself with only observing, that they had alwaysdiffered in their sentiments concerning the education of theirchildren. "I wish," said he, "brother, you would have confined yourcare to your own daughter, and never have troubled yourself with myson, who hath, I believe, as little profited by your precepts, as byyour example." For young Nightingale was his uncle's godson, and hadlived more with him than with his father. So that the uncle had oftendeclared he loved his nephew almost equally with his own child.
Jones fell into raptures with this good gentleman; and when, aftermuch persuasion, they found the father grew still more and moreirritated, instead of appeased, Jones conducted the uncle to hisnephew at the house of Mrs Miller.