“Yeah, but since when do I wait around for an invitation?”

  “True.”

  “How you doin’?”

  “Fine. Why?”

  “I, uh, I’m taking off for a few days.”

  I’m a little surprised he doesn’t ask where. For a few seconds, I wrestle with whether I should tell him Heidi’s coming with me, but I finally decide against it.

  “Go,” he says, waving his hand at the door. “I have Wrath, Z, and Trinity up my ass twenty-four-seven, I’ll be fine.”

  “Murphy?” he calls out as I’m about to shut the door.

  “Yeah?”

  “Please don’t knock my sister up.”

  “Asshole.” I flip him off, but there’s a big part of me that’s relieved. And an even bigger part of me is happy he’s back to joking around here and there.

  I stop in the kitchen and throw some bottles of water, sodas, and iced tea in a cooler. Excitement’s buzzing through me when I get to my truck and load it up.

  “Where you headed?” Wrath asks.

  “Shit!” My elbow slams into the door. “How can someone your size be such a stealthy motherfucker?”

  Because it’s Wrath, he takes that as a compliment.

  “I’m taking Heidi away for a few days.”

  He raises an eyebrow, folds his arms against his chest, and leans on the side of my truck. “Really? I’m not sure how I feel about this.”

  “Good thing no one asked your opinion.”

  “Ballsy, that’s good.”

  I gesture for him to move so I can open the back door, then freeze when I see Alexa’s car seat.

  “What’s wrong?” he asks.

  “Nothing. Hope’s watching the baby for the weekend and I feel bad leaving her.”

  He stares at me.

  “What? It’s not weird, right? Parents go away together for weekends, don’t they?”

  “You realize what you just said, right?”

  “What? Going away together?”

  He slaps the side of my arm. Hard. “Never mind. I take it back. I feel good about the two of you together.”

  Somewhere with you

  While Blake might have been eager to finally have sex, he still takes his sweet time. First, there’s the three-hour drive up the Northway. Then another half an hour finding the place.

  It’s amazing, though. A huge, elegant lodge nestled in the mountains behind a glittering lake.

  Not even the snooty old man who checks us into the hotel snuffs out my excitement. I’m so wound up—thrilled, throbbing with anticipation—that I’m afraid I’ll explode in the lobby.

  When we’re finally inside our room, the door closes and I jump him. My arms wind around his neck and I press a kiss to his mouth. He kisses me back, quick. “Whoa. Slow down.”

  “Slow? Really?”

  He drops the bags to the floor and wraps both arms around my waist, keeping me still. “Yeah. Let’s take our time.”

  Crap. That makes me feel slutty. Tears cloud my vision and I push past him to go to the bathroom.

  “Hey, what’s wrong?”

  “Nothing.” I’m being silly. I know that’s not what he meant.

  “Heidi?” His serious tone makes me stop. “Talk to me.”

  I open my mouth, but I don’t know how to explain the awful feelings welling up inside. “You make me feel like I’m being too eager,” I whisper finally. It doesn’t make a lot of sense, but it’s the best I can do.

  He brushes the hair out of my eyes. “I’m thrilled. I’ve just been waiting so long. I want to do everything right. Want this to be perfect for you.”

  Each word is filled with so much emotion, it drives the doubt out of my chest. He’s overthinking this as much as I am. “It will be perfect because it’s you. Because it’s us.”

  “Yeah,” he agrees.

  Feeling better, I rock to my tiptoes and kiss his cheek. “Thank you.”

  His gaze darts around the room, and I take a second to appreciate it, too. “Wow. Fancy, Blake.”

  He chuckles and moves to the small bar area on the far wall. I follow him over and gasp when I see the box of plump chocolate covered strawberries. Blake knows they’re my favorite.

  “How?”

  “I asked for them to be in the room, along with the flowers.” He nods at the vase on the table at the foot of the bed.

  I’d been so focused on him, I missed the flowers. I slip my hand into his. “That was so sweet, thank you.” He places a kiss on my forehead. “We should probably move the flowers, though. Things are going to get wild on that bed, and I don’t want to accidentally break the vase.”

  His eyes widen before he bursts out laughing. “Damn right they are.”

  Turning, he plucks one of the strawberries out of the box and holds it for me to take a bite. Strawberry juice and chocolate end up all over my face and they’re so good, I don’t even care.

  Blake lowers his head, kissing me soft and slow. I sway and steady myself by holding on to him. His kiss grows more urgent and he presses is body against me. Years of wanting each other seem to shape our kiss. We’re finally together. Alone together. Able to learn everything about each other.

  “Love you, Heidi,” he murmurs as he ends our kiss, searching my face as if he wants to memorize this moment.

  Pulling away, I lean over to pick up my bag. “Give me a second. I want to change.”

  He lifts an eyebrow but lets me go.

  I take my time, stripping down, rubbing coconut oil into my skin until I’m soft and smooth all over. It takes a second of rummaging through my bag to find the black and green lace bralette and panty set I brought with me. I bought it with Murphy in mind. How long ago I won’t say. It’s a sheer, black, fishnet material with green lace. The top has stretchy fishnet cups with a keyhole cutout. Useless for support. Perfect for sexiness. There are a bunch of straps that wind down and around my ribcage. The panties are full bikini panties—no thongs for me. The material of both pieces is so sheer, everything is visible. It’s a little bit sweet and a little bit slutty.

  Of course, Blakes’s seen way hotter girls in way tinier outfits for years at the strip club and at the clubhouse.

  The thought is like a bucket of ice water over my head.

  “Heidi?” He taps on the door.

  The concern in his voice helps me forget about the thoughts that should stay in the past. I whip my hair into a long, messy braid over one shoulder and open the door.

  “Holy. Fuck. Wow,” Blake stammers while backing up a few steps to take all of me in. “That’s so fucking hot. Turn around.”

  Bracing myself on the doorframe, I spin and slowly wiggle my butt. I peek over my shoulder and find him staring, running his hand over his beard, possibly drooling. “Is this okay?” I ask.

  “Yes.” In a few smooth, measured steps, he’s pressed up against my back, winding an arm around my middle and pulling me against him. “You’re every fantasy I’ve ever had and finally in my arms,” he whispers against my neck.

  My breath catches.

  “But now I’m worried.”

  “About what?”

  The arm around my middle flexes, squeezing me tighter, while he wraps his free hand up in my braid and gives it a gentle tug. “I’m worried,” he says in between tiny kisses along my shoulder. “That I’m so worked up, I won’t be able to be sweet and gentle.”

  “I don’t want gentle. I want you.”

  His hands drop to my hips and he turns me so I’m facing him. I reach up, looping my arms around his neck. “I want you the way you are. Just you and me. No pretending we’re anything other than who we are.”

  “I love you, Heidi. You understand that, right?”

  I can’t find any words, so I nod instead.

  “I’ve always loved you, but like you said, this is different.”

  “This is forever?”

  He was wrong. He can be gentle, because he places the softest kiss on my forehead and says, “Exactly.”

>   As soon as I have all of her, I know that’ll be it for me. She’s all I want, all I’ve wanted for way too long.

  Those few moments together on her eighteenth birthday—Heidi riding my fingers, exploding for me—was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. I had the worst case of blue balls after, but it was still the best sexual experience of my life. Doesn’t matter how many girls I’ve been with or how many filthy things I’ve done. That small taste of her fucked me up permanently—the way I always knew it would. I tried living without her and it’s impossible.

  My lips move from her forehead to her mouth. One of my hands slides into her hair to hold her still. My other hand squeezes her hip. The solid feel of her against my body beats out every fantasy I’ve had.

  Against my mouth, she makes these eager sounds and her body melts into mine. Her hips arch toward me, and I slide my hand from her hip to grab her ass. She moans into my mouth again and drags her fingers from the back of my neck to my scalp. The shivery sensation from her nails on my skin feels so good, I lean into it, silently asking for more.

  I’m so hard. Too hard. Afraid-I-might-hurt-her hard. I couldn’t stop if I wanted to, so I remind myself to be gentle. We’re so close. She’s in this sexy see-through, lacy outfit and I can’t resist. Her body tightens as I slide my hand down the front of the tiny scrap of lace between her legs. Heat pours off her. Slick, wet heat. She jumps and lets out a little cry when I graze her skin. I use that gasp to push my tongue into her mouth. She tastes as sweet as I remember. My lips slide to her jaw and I nudge her toward the bed, still kissing my way down her neck.

  The back of her legs hit the bed and she lets out a surprised oh sound. My fingers brush against her inner thigh and she shudders. “Get on the bed,” I whisper against her ear.

  She does something so perfectly Heidi, I’m rocked to my core. She turns and jumps on the bed, scooting all the way to the top and landing in the pile of pillows. Sweet, eager, not meant to be seductive—but it is. Then she does something completely unexpected, by patting the bed and wiggling her eyebrows. “Come get me,” she taunts.

  “Wait,” I say.

  She drops the cute come-to-me look. “What?”

  “Here.” I slip the paper out of my pocket and toss it onto the nightstand.

  “What’s this?” she asks as she reaches over and picks it up. She has some medical training, right? She’ll figure it out. Her gaze flicks up after she finishes reviewing it. “An STD test result sheet? Is this supposed to be romantic? Because I’m not feeling it.”

  She’s teasing, and I let out a short laugh. “I’m trying to be an adult here.”

  “Well,” she says, glancing down at the results one more time—surprised I’m clean, perhaps—and shaking her head. “I don’t have one for you.”

  “I don’t need one from you.”

  Her big brown eyes stay focused on me as if she’s waiting for more information. Shit. Why is this so fucking awkward? Because it’s Heidi and I’m trying to do everything right, but instead, I feel like I’m screwing everything up. I reach up and rub my hand over the back of my head while I figure out how to explain I’ve never gone bare with anyone else, and I don’t want there to be anything between us. “Are you on the pill?”

  “Oh.” She averts her eyes and nods, as if my question finally helped all the pieces click into place. “Uh…” Her forehead wrinkles and she tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. “Well, no. I was breastfeeding and then, you know, there didn’t seem like much point.” Her cheeks are bright red now, and I feel like an asshole for putting her on the spot.

  Call me twisted, but I’m also harder than a motherfuckin’ hammer. Not because she’s embarrassed—I’m not that much of a dick.

  “Anyway, I should warn you that Alexa happened while I was on the pill, so…” she trails off.

  “Really?”

  Her eyes snap to mine. “It happens.”

  I hold up my hands. “I wasn’t—”

  “I know.” She huffs out a breath. “So, now that you’ve pretty much killed my lady boner, what should we do?”

  How can I not burst out laughing? “Mine’s fine.”

  Her eyes immediately zero in on my dick, which only makes things more uncomfortable behind my zipper.

  “How nice for you,” she says with a sly smile.

  I slip my shirt up and over my head, since she seemed to enjoy checking out my upper body before.

  She still likes it, because she takes in a sharp breath, kneels up, and runs her hands over my chest. I take one of her hands and drag it lower. She gives my dick a squeeze through my jeans, and I almost come in my pants. I really should get one out of the way so I can calm down.

  “Do you want that?” I ask, as she strokes me even harder.

  “Yes.”

  “Want to kiss it first?”

  She pulls away and gives me strange look. I feel dangerously close to begging her to suck my dick. A new experience and not one I’m currently enjoying.

  “No?” I ask.

  “Not yet. You need to give head to get it.”

  What the what?

  I can’t come up with a response. My experiences with that haven’t been positive. Girls I’ve been with either didn’t want it or were only looking to please me, so they never asked, which was fine, because I don’t enjoy doing things I’m not good at.

  But this is Heidi. Not a club girl or random chick I don’t care about. There’s nothing I won’t do for her.

  Why am I still thinking about this?

  Get your face between her legs, idiot!

  I work a cocky grin onto my face and rub my hand over my chin. “All you had to do was ask, sweetheart. Lie back.”

  She narrows her eyes—seeing right through my cocky bullshit, I’m sure—but does as I ask.

  “Spread those legs for me.”

  Almost shyly, she does it. For someone who boldly told me what she wanted five seconds ago, the shyness is funny.

  “Why’re you laughing at me?” she asks.

  “I’m not,” I answer as I slide onto my belly and grip her thighs with my hands. I glance up at her. “You’ve got a pretty pussy, baby.” My eyebrows wiggle, and she laughs so hard her legs shake.

  “Touch me,” she whispers.

  How can I say no? I push the thin strip of lace out of my way and trace my fingers over her smooth skin.

  “Use your tongue.”

  “Calm down, bossy. I’m getting there.”

  She screws her face into this pissy expression that’s both unexpected and cute.

  “Keep it up.” I slap her pussy lightly and she gasps.

  “Did you just spank my pussy?”

  “Yup.”

  She laughs and her knees fall together, so I wedge my shoulders against her legs. “You want me to kiss you here, keep your legs open.”

  I’m watching her face closely for every reaction. Her breathing picks up. She likes when I tell her what to do. Good.

  Hooking my fingers into her panties, I drag them down her legs. “These are pretty, but they’ve got to go.”

  She laughs softly.

  “Did you buy them for me?”

  “Yup.”

  “Thank you.”

  I can’t get over how pretty she is. All pink and glistening.

  All mine.

  I place little kisses against her inner thigh. Slowly working my way up. I take a slow lick and she makes the sweetest gasping-moaning noise, arching her hips up.

  “Do you like that?”

  “Yes. More.”

  “So demanding,” I tease. I trace a few more long, slow licks over her wet flesh. I can’t get enough of her. My hands dig into her hips, pulling her to my mouth, so I can run my tongue up her center over and over.

  Her hands grip my hair, and she lets out a bunch of stunned little cries and gasps.

  “You like that, Heidi? Tell me. Talk to me.”

  “Uh…ah…yes. More.”

  I lick and suck and tease her with my
tongue and fingers until she’s trembling. I want to make her come on my tongue more than anything else I’ve ever wanted.

  A few seconds later, she does.

  “Oh, Blake, please.” She draws the words out until they’re a high-pitched moan.

  Kiss and nip my way up her body, stopping to play with her breasts, which are still covered in the black lacy top.

  I keep kissing, softer as I reach her neck. “Did you like that?” I whisper.

  “Oh my God, yes.”

  I can’t help smiling, pleased with myself. “You sound surprised.”

  She opens one eye and the opposite corner of her mouth quirks up. “Well, I figured with all those girls willing to do whatever you asked, you might be lazy in bed.”

  “Wow,” I say, drawing out the word and laughing at the same time, because secretly to myself, I’m laughing at how well she has me pegged. “I did not see this coming.”

  “What’s that?”

  “You being such a brat.”

  She covers her mouth and giggles. “Sure you did.”

  Grabbing her hand, I bring it to my mouth and kiss her fingers. “I love that you always say what you’re thinking instead of what you think I want to hear.”

  “Lucky for you that I’m full of opinions.”

  “Yeah, I am lucky.” I trace my finger over her cheek. “But you know what, beautiful?” My voice comes out lower. Rougher. And the smile fades from her face.

  “What?”

  I’ve never been with a woman who challenges me the way Heidi does. Tease and flirt, sure, had plenty of that. But challenge me until all my instincts are riled up? Nope.

  From Heidi, I love it. Gets me hotter than anything. I want to please her more than I want a quick release. She also pushes me to discover what I really want.

  She’s watching me with expectant eyes, her chest rising and falling rapidly, waiting for my answer. “The punishment for that bratty mouth of yours is that I’m going to fuck you so thoroughly, you won’t be able to walk straight. Have fun explaining that when we get home.”

  “Is that a promise or threat? Because it kind of sounds like fun.”

  Blake growls against my throat and places rough kisses all over my neck and shoulders, making me laugh and then moan.