I sniffed but didn’t answer.
“How are your classes?”
“Fine.”
“So, you still get to graduate?”
Sending him an odd look, I nodded. “Yeah. Why?”
With a frustrated laugh, he jerked his hands into the air. “I don’t know, man. You tell me. Something is definitely bothering you. You haven’t been typical annoying Ten since...fuck, I almost can’t remember when.”
“Well, I’m sorry to disappoint you,” I snapped. “Nothing’s fucking wrong. I’m not fucking sick. And the world’s not fucking ending. But I am beat. I’m going home to take a nap before I have to put up with you losers for the rest of the night.”
A sudden smile lit his face. “Oh, so that’s what this is about. Your midnight visitor been keeping you up too late lately?”
I almost choked on my own oxygen. “What? No. Fuck, that’s over. She’s not...she’s not coming back again.” I had to glance away when I said that. My face felt hot and shit. But when I did look away from Gam, I accidently met Ham’s gaze.
When my roommate narrowed his eyes and frowned sternly, I blinked in confusion. What was up with him?
“As I live and breathe,” Gamble murmured beside him. “I never thought I’d see the day a woman could tie you into knots.” His grin died as he studied me longer. “So what’d you do to piss her off and send her running?”
“Nothing,” I muttered, pissed he instantly thought I had to be the reason for my imaginary break-up with my imaginary midnight visitor. “And for your information, I am not tied in—”
I kind of forgot the next thing I wanted to say when I spotted Caroline and Blondie strolling our way. The knots in my stomach expanded, letting me know just how securely they were indeed tied.
Jesus, this girl owned me completely, and she probably had no clue.
Heat raced across my skin. The urge to go to her swept over me, and it took everything I had not to just...go. But Hamilton bumped me—hard—in the arm, making me stumble off balance and break my gaze from her.
I scowled at him, but he only mouthed two words my way, which looked like Stop staring.
Fuck, I had been staring at Caroline right in front of her brother, and getting turned on, unable to forget last night, or the night before that, or the fucking Friday before that.
“Hey, kiddo,” Gamble called when he noticed her. “You ready to get home? Aspen said she was cooking lasagna for supper.”
“Mmm.” The unintentional seduction in Caroline’s voice about made me go cross-eyed. I kept myself from looking at her directly, but I could tell by watching her from the corner of my eye that she was rubbing her belly. “I could die fat and happy from Aspen’s lasagna.”
And I could die fat and happy from her little moans.
Gamble’s woman really did make a kick-ass lasagna, though. In fact, if I’d been acting as my usual self, I’d step in right about now and finagle my way into getting an invite to supper, or fuck, I’d resort to outright begging for one and end up inviting myself over whether Gam said yes or no.
But I had this sense that if I opened my mouth right then, I’d say the first thing on my mind, which would be to tell Caroline how good she looked, or ask her when I’d get to see her again...alone, in my bedroom.
So I kept my lips clamped firmly and my attention on a fucking tree next to us as the other four members of the group chatted a few minutes before Gamble slung his arm around his sister’s shoulders, called a goodbye to us and steered her away.
She had to walk right past me to leave, though, and I just couldn’t handle it. As soon as she passed, I shifted out my arm that had been hanging down at my side and flexed the backs of my fingers so that they brushed across hers. I kept my attention on Gamble, making sure he saw none of this. Caroline responded by weaving her fingers through mine so they interlaced for the fraction of a moment before she pulled them away and was gone.
I stared after her, pulverized. She’d been right fucking there, and the only thing I’d gotten to do was barely brush my hand against hers?
Not fucking right. That had sucked ass. Majorly.
Turning away, edgy and cantankerous, I jerked to a stop when I found both Blondie and Ham watching me quite openly, and sternly.
Shit. I’d forgotten about them.
Ham lifted a disappointed eyebrow. “Really? Do you think you could’ve been any more obvious?”
I blinked, confused but worried what he might suspect. “Huh?”
“You’re going to get yourself caught if you keep staring at her like that. And what was up with that hand thing? Noel’s definitely going to figure out she was Midnight Visitor if he catches you sneaking in crap like that.”
My mouth fell open as I stared at him, unable to say anything. But, yeah...mind blown.
“You...know?” I finally found the words to rasp. I glanced from between him to a flushing, guiltily cringing Blondie. Well, shit. They both knew. “How long have you guys known?”
Ham sighed and rubbed a spot on the center of his forehead. “Since Saturday,” he admitted.
Again, I could only stare. Unable to believe him, I glanced at his woman for confirmation. She gulped and nodded.
“What the hell?” I exploded. “How could you two know before I knew?”
Blondie shifted closer to Ham and began to wring her hands as she confessed. “Caroline. She, uh, she confided in me.”
“Well...fuck.” I set my hands on my hips and stared up at the sky where odd-shaped clouds drifted overhead. For a moment, I was transported to my childhood when my sister and I would lie on our backs in the grass and think up dirty images we saw in the clouds. Yeah, I was troubled enough that I almost settled for memories of her rather than dealing with my two know-everything roommates. But shit, the pain that came with those memories chased me back to the present.
I shook my head and glared at Ham. “And you never thought to tell me who was sneaking into my room? Jesus, man. I was fucking betraying Gamble, and I had no idea.”
Saying that felt like a lie though, because okay, I’d had an idea, but I hadn’t known.
Had I?
Fuck. The sudden taste of bile at the back of my throat made me swallow hard.
“It’d already happened by the time I found out,” Hamilton told me. “What would telling you have accomplished?”
Was he freaking serious? “It would’ve kept me from doing it again, maybe.”
“Are you sure?” He lifted an eyebrow. “You know now, and it’s...not going to keep you from going back for more, now is it?”
“Shut up.” I scowled at both him and his woman. “It’s too late now. We’ve already...” Shit, I didn’t know what we’d already done. But there was no way we could just...stop it just because it was wrong to keep it from Gamble. That point had passed too many kisses and orgasms ago. We were already set and aimed straight toward our collision course with fate.
“Do you remember when Noel thought I was doing something with Caroline and he went for my throat?” Ham asked out of the blue, his voice soft and almost apologetic.
I snorted. “How could I forget?” It had proved to me that Gam would never think I was good enough for her if he didn’t even think my flawless roommate was worthy of her.
“Yeah, well, when he apologized to me for overreacting, he said it wasn’t because he thought I wasn’t good enough for her but because he thought I was sneaking around with her. He said someone else had done that to her, had treated her like she wasn’t the type to date openly, and Noel thought she deserved better than that. He was mad because he thought I’d been keeping her a secret.”
Ouch.
Shame bore down on me with a vengeance. My roommate was standing there telling me I was no better than that fucker from Caroline’s hometown who’d used her and left her pregnant and alone, and I had to agree with him.
“Well, she does deserve better than becoming someone’s secret,” I said, my voice all raspy with regret. But sh
it. I hissed, “Why didn’t you tell me about this conversation before?”
“Would it have made a difference?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe.” But it was too fucking late now. He’d already think I’d been sneaking her around if I told him now, because I’d already been fucking sneaking her around.
Damn...it.
I wiped my quivering hands over my face. “Doesn’t matter. Like I said, it’s too late. Thanks so much for your fucking help.”
I strode away from them in a bundle of broiling nerves. It was then I fully realized just how badly this was going to end. And I started to panic.
I know what you’re thinking. Why didn’t I just cut ties with her then if I was so worried about Gamble? Well, why don’t you ask a smoker why they don’t just stop smoking, an alcoholic why they don’t just stop drinking, a book lover why they don’t just stop reading? And fuck you for thinking an addiction was even remotely easy to quit. I was addicted to this girl. I wasn’t anywhere near ready to give her up.
And thus started the true turmoil.
So, stabbing my best friend in the back sucked ass, but finally having Caroline after months of wanting her…that was fucking heaven.
On day six of our week-long agreement, she rested her cheek against my shoulder, pressed her damp breasts to my side and started drawing patterns on my chest before saying, “So tomorrow’s our last night together, huh?”
My brow furrowed. Not even wanting to think about it, I took her hand and concentrated on weaving our fingers together. “No,” I said slowly. “I think your math’s off. We’ve still got, like, four or five more days left.”
“Yeah,” she finally murmured. “Yeah, I think you’re right.”
And that was that.
The next day, our one-week time limit came. The day after that, it passed. I kept picking my midnight visitor up at the curb a block from her house damn near every night and then dropping her back off hours later. And I kept doing naughty, unspeakable things to her. And yeah, I loved every second of it. But then, so did she.
So, not on day eight—hell, not even on day twelve—did either of us mention the fact that we’d gone over our affair’s deadline. I’m pretty sure neither of us cared that we totally broke the rules. In those first few weeks, nothing mattered but the next time I could be inside her. Not even the fact that I was completely betraying my best friend on earth.
I still hated it when she brought up his name though, especially when we were wrapped up together and relaxed into a near coma after a really vigorous round of sex.
“Is it immature to hide this from Noel?” she asked, her cheek resting on my arm and her perfect ass tucked in my lap as my arms remained banded around her.
A tick formed in my jaw, but she didn’t see it, so I shrugged. “We’re still young. Aren’t we allowed some immaturity?”
She sighed. I hated that sigh because it told me keeping this from him bothered her as much as it bothered me. “I know you hate lying to him, but I...I want to wait to tell him, if that’s okay with you. This is just...”
“None of his damn business.” I growled, irritated because he was even an issue.
“Well, that and...it’s new and fun, and he’ll make it all—”
“Trust me.” I stroked her hip to relax her. “I’m not exactly thrilled about the idea of having my best friend go all disapproving dad on me. And we know he will. I don’t mind waiting. Maybe if he sees me settling down for a while and not chasing every woman who crosses my path, he’ll grow a little more...open to the idea.”
He wouldn’t. She probably knew that as well as I did. Gamble had gotten drunk with me too many times, he’d seen me hook up with scores of women too many times, hell, he’d shared women with me too many times to ever let me chase after someone important to him.
“Yeah.” Caroline blew out a breath and sent me a blinding smile, letting me know I’d said the right thing. “Maybe a little time will help him…adjust to the idea.”
Her smile did things to me, so I rolled her until she was on her stomach. Needing to distract her from the sadness, guilt and unease that always followed a “Noel” conversation, I rubbed her back and kissed my way down her spine. A grin lit my face as she gave a dreamy sigh.
“Damn, I love your mouth and hands on me.”
Her voice was languid yet husky, so I leaned in to whisper in her ear. “And I love your after-sex voice. Just listening to it makes me want to…” Instead of describing my fantasies, I pressed my hips up against her perfect bare ass and rubbed my growing cock against her sweet tush.
She sucked in a breath and arched back. “Again? Already?”
“With you? Always.” After suiting up, I took one of her legs and shifted it out of my way so I could slot myself between her thighs. “Excuse me. Pardon me, ma’am. I just need through here. Thanks.”
She giggled just as I entered her from behind. And then... “Oh,” She gasped in surprise. “Wow. I love how full you always make me feel, how perfectly you slide in and out, how warm and stimulating your fingers are when they cup my breasts and...yeah. That.”
I grinned as I lightly pinched her nipples. She arched and moaned out her need. “Oh God. Oren.”
I wanted to tell her I loved it when she said my name like that. But I just sighed. “I know, right? I’m really good at this.”
Another laugh blurted from her. “And so modest, too.”
“Modest, schmodest.” I rolled onto my back so she was on top of me but still facing away. The new exposing angle made her gasp, but I took advantage of it by cupping a breast in one hand and her clit in the other. “Who wants modesty when you can have the best sex of your life?”
“Not…not me, I guess,” she panted out, turning her face to the side until our cheeks brushed. “I…ooooohhhh.”
I slowed the movement of my fingers, really getting into the playfulness of the moment. “What was that?” I asked as I nibbled at her earlobe.
“Oh, shut up.” Panting and straining on top of me, she caught my hip and buried her fingers into my flesh. “Just finish it already.”
Slowing the progress of my fingers even more, I applied more pressure to her pussy lips. “Haven’t you ever heard of patience, Miss Gamble?”
“Damn you,” she muttered. Then she arched her back, pressed her cheek alongside mine, and lifted her hips before coming down on me and sending an electric jolt through my dick. But the girl wasn’t finished yet. She squeezed her inner muscles at the same moment she reached behind her and grasped two fistfuls of my hair. And holy hell, okay, so maybe I liked my hair being pulled too.
“Not fair.” I growled and went off, unable to stop the orgasm that gripped me by the balls.
Caroline laughed as I came inside her. Then she cried out as she followed me into oblivion.
If we made it to a second round in one night, I usually took her home directly afterward, because otherwise we knew we’d fall asleep and accidently spend the entire night together.
But neither of us had moved yet. I was even too exhausted to run my hand over her like I always liked to do. We kind of just lay slumped there, limp against each other. I didn’t want the moment to end, though I knew we’d have to go soon.
The worst part of each night was sneaking her back home.
“I’m thinking about getting set up on birth control,” she said out of the blue.
Every muscle in my body tightened. I knew she felt my reaction. But shit. This was the first reference to a future between us that she’d ever mentioned. This meant she actually wanted a future between us. The idea scared me as much as it thrilled me. I’d avoided relationships for four years for a reason, but here I was ready to dive into the most dangerous one ever without even batting an eyelash. This wasn’t me, and that was the terrifying part.
But, God, a future with Caroline. That thought was fucking nirvana.
I cleared my throat and pushed all the casualness into my voice that I possessed. “Sounds good to
me.”
“Good,” she echoed.
I didn’t answer, a little dizzy from what had just happened. We’d just made an agreement. We were now a couple.
A few minutes of silence filled the room. I was too petrified to say anything, even to offer to take her home now.
Caroline drew in a breath and asked, “How’s your portfolio and resume writing coming along?”
Ready to discuss anything but our new relationship status, I sat up and started to climb off the bed. “I’ll show you if you want to see.”
“Of course.”
As I gathered the bag full of shit I’d collected with my portfolio and resume kit, she sat up naked and crossed her legs, eagerly waiting for me to show her what I had. I paused, freshly startled by just how good she looked sitting that way, prim yet naughty.
Having her here, naked in my bed, was a wet dream come true.
Shaking my head free of such thoughts, I dragged my crap to her and flopped onto the mattress next to her. “This one’s my portfolio.” I handed it over. “Here’s the list of places seeking new partners. Here’s the resume I keep scrapping and starting over again. And this—”
She looked up from the shit I was piling into her arms. “So you haven’t applied to any of these places yet?” She dug out the folders full of job listings.
I shook my head. Of course, I hadn’t applied. I was scared shitless of growing up and finding a real job. I liked my life as it was. I supported myself and was surrounded by my friends, and Caroline was in my bed now. If I found a good job, I’d most likely have to move, and I didn’t want to leave this yet, not when I was as satisfied right where I was and as happy as I’d ever been.
“My resume looks like shit,” I said instead, using that excuse. “I can’t send it out looking like this.”
Caroline chewed on her lip as she glanced over my resume. “You know,” she said. I thought she was going to offer to read it for me, but she surprised me when she said, “Aspen just went over her own resume when she applied for that position at the high school. I’m sure she’d be happy to help you make yours shine.”