Clay,
I’m just getting in your way right now. Gone to Dad’s. Take your time.
Nat
In my way?
In my fuckin’ way?
Is she crazy? She’s the only thing that’s keeping me from losin’ my shit lately. When I’ve felt lost, she’s been right there to hold me close. When I felt overwhelmed with Seth’s funeral, she jumped right in and took care of things. She’s been at my side, loving and sweet and supportive and it’s been so fuckin’ appreciated and she thinks she’s in the goddamn way?
My mouth goes dry. I . . . I’ve chased her away. Fuck.
I know I haven’t been as affectionate since Seth died. I know it’s been a week since we’ve made love. I know she’s reached out to me and I’ve been remote. It’s just my way of dealin’. I thought she knew that I needed a little time in my head to sort through things—but what if she didn’t? What if she thought I was silently tryin’ to send her a message to go away?
What if I’ve lost her?
The thought is like a gut-punch and I feel sick. I drop to a nearby chair, reading the note again. Take my time. Take my time? I don’t want time if it’s not with her. I don’t want my time. I want every second, every hour of her time.
I can’t lose Nat. Not when I’ve just got her back.
I fling myself out of the chair, grabbin’ my keys. No sedan today, no limo today—I don’t want to wait for them to get here. Time to take my truck. I race down to the elevator and when it doesn’t come fast enough, head for the stairs. If Nat’s gone, I’m gonna fuckin’ bring her back. If she thinks she’s not important to me, then it’s up to me to show her just how much she means to me.
If it takes more money, I’ll spend it.
If it takes grovelin’, I’ll do it.
I just can’t imagine life without her at my side. Already I feel empty at the thought.
I fucked up. I was hurtin’ and instead of reachin’ out to my girl, I pushed her away. Just like seven years ago, I didn’t talk to her. I pushed her away and now I’m gonna pay the price.
I only hope it’s not too late.
Chapter Sixteen
Clay
A man’s never driven so fast down the highway. I push the pedal in my truck down to the floorboards. Every minute that ticks past feels like another minute that might make things too late. It’s tearin’ me up inside that she thinks she’s in the way. That she’s leavin’ for my sake. Fuck all that. I’m a selfish enough bastard to admit that I want her at my side always. Her stayin’ is for my sake. Didn’t realize what a good thing I had when she came back to me, agreein’ to my stupid-ass contract and my ignorant demands. Fuckin’ anal. I demanded anal because I thought it was funny. Here she was havin’ to give up her pride and her dignity just so she could keep her dad off the streets, and I’m demandin’ her butthole because it soothes my pride.
I’m such a goddamn bastard. I hate myself right now for what I’ve put her through.
I don’t want to lose her. I can’t.
When I pull up to the Chap Weston Museum and Ranch, I growl to myself at the realization that it’s the grand reopening and the place is packed. There’s not a spot open in the newly expanded parking lot. I circle it twice, tapping impatiently on my steering wheel and hopin’ a slot will open up. When one doesn’t, I get tired of waitin’ and drive my truck onto the freshly landscaped grass and park it there. I’ll fuckin’ pay for the flowerbeds to be fixed. I don’t care. Right now I just want to see my Natalie.
I slam out of the truck and up the path. There’s a short line waitin’ to get in, and I push ahead of them. Someone protests but no one stops me. Inside, the place is twice as crowded, and I push past two rooms crammed full of people before someone taps me on the shoulder. “You need to wait your turn, mister,” a woman with a baby under her arm and two kids behind her tells me, giving me her best mom glare.
“I ain’t here for the tour,” I say, tryin’ to push past.
A big man—probably her husband—moves in front of the doorway to the next room, blockin’ me. He crosses his arms over his chest. “You need to stop and think about what you’re doing, sir.”
Fuck, enough with this. I’m normally the good-natured Price brother, but right now, I’m about to punch a man in the face. “And you need to move—”
“What’s going on?” a woman asks in a bright, chipper voice. Suddenly there’s a pink cowboy hat at my side, and for a flash of a second, I think it’s Natalie. But it’s only the actress I hired to do the tour. She’s dressed similar to Natalie’s old costume, her hair in pigtails. “Oh, Mr. Price!” She beams at me. “Are you here for the grand opening?”
“I’m looking for Natalie,” I tell her. “Natalie Weston.”
“Oh!” She gestures past her. “I think she’s actually helping out in the gift shop right now—”
I grab her by the shoulders and gently move her to the side. “That’s all I needed to know.” I step forward but the man’s still blocking my way, and I give him a deadly look.
“It’s all right, sir,” the actress tells the man. “Mr. Price is the owner.”
I don’t correct her. Ain’t got time for that shit. All I care about is that the man moves to the side and then I rush past him, frantically tearing through the crowded rooms and looking for the gift shop.
I can’t be too late. I refuse to think it. If I can get her to hear me out, there’s still a chance for us.
I burst into the gift shop, and to my frustration, it’s twice as crowded as any other room. People are grabbin’ up souvenirs like they’re goin’ out of fashion. The tiny cafe tucked in the corner has a huge line, and I can hear the coffee machine’s frother goin’ a mile a minute. I look around desperately for Nat, but she’s dark-haired and short and doesn’t stick out in a crowd. Is she not here? Did I miss her? Or is she hidin’ from me? The thought wrenches my heart. If I’ve lost her—
“A double mocha latte?” a familiar voice calls out, and as I look in that direction, I see a familiar arm holding up a coffee in a Chap Weston decorated disposable cup. “Double mocha latte? Who had it?”
Nat.
Thank god.
I move forward, pushing people aside. There she is, lookin’ just as pretty as ever. Her hair’s down around her shoulders and curled slightly, and she has a pretty, pale pink dress on that makes her look all peaches and cream. Her lips part in surprise as I move forward and take the coffee out of her hand.
“Hey, that’s mine,” someone says, protesting.
I put the coffee down on the counter and take her hands in mine. Her mouth is open slightly and she stares in shock at me. “Clay?”
Fuck. I’m just so glad to see her. She’s here. I caught her before she could walk out of my life again. The emotions I’ve been holding back for the last two weeks rush through me with staggering force, and I drop to my knees and bury my face in her skirts, my arms locked around her waist. “Don’t ever leave me,” I tell her raggedly. “Never, ever again.”
“Oh . . . honey,” she says softly, and her hand strokes my hair. “I wasn’t leaving. I just wanted to give you a little room to breathe.”
“I don’t need room to breathe. I need you.” I look up at her. “You’re all I’ve ever needed.”
The look on her face is beautiful to see. A tiny, understanding smile curves her pretty mouth and she strokes her fingers over my short beard. “I know it’s been a hard few days, Clay. I just didn’t want you to feel like you had to rush on my account. I know there’s a lot demanding your time right now—”
I shake my head, because this last hour or two, when I thought I lost her again, has made things crystal clear to me. Nothing matters if I don’t have her. She makes me happy. “I love you, Natalie Weston.”
Someone in the crowd “awwws.”
Nat’s smile grows wider, radiant. “I love you, too, Clay Price. I always have. I’ve been waiting for you to say that, you know. I think I’ve always been waiting for you.
”
I get to my feet and cup her face, bending so I can give her a kiss. I claim her mouth with a fierce, possessive locking of lips, showing her just how damn much she means to me.
“This is a very sweet moment,” someone nearby says, “but can you guys do that somewhere away from the counter? I’m trying to make coffee here.”
Nat pulls away, her eyes shining. “My bedroom’s upstairs, remember?” she whispers.
“Say no more.” I lock my hands under Nat’s hips and lift her into my arms. She gives a little scream of surprise and flings her arms around my neck, pressin’ her tits near my face. Takes everythin’ I have not to plant a kiss on ’em, but there’s dozens of people watchin’ us right now. I push my way through the crowd, toward the back of the house where I remember the stairs are, my woman in my arms.
It isn’t until we’re up the stairs that I set Natalie down. A glance toward the far end of the hall shows the double doors of Chap Weston’s rooms are closed, and I half wonder if my girl’s gonna head down there like she did last time, and talk to her daddy. I want to tackle her into bed, but I know the nurturer in her always wants to make sure that everyone’s doing okay, even her asshole old man.
But she doesn’t even look in that direction today. She puts a finger to her lips and opens the door to her room, then tugs me inside.
And . . . wow. I remember sneakin’ into Nat’s room once as a teenager, back when we were datin’ for the first time. I remember that everything was pink and white and girlish, like she was five years old instead of sixteen. Now, seven years later, I’m a little startled to see that it hasn’t changed a bit. Nat still has a ruffled white canopy bed and pink walls. There’s a fluffy white throw rug on the floor, delicate white dressers, and a chest covered with worn stuffed animals off to one side. It still looks like the room of Shirley Temple instead of a grown woman.
“Uh,” I say softly.
“I know,” Nat says, and moves to my side. She buries her face against my chest. “It’s a hideous room. But my dad thought I was a little girl—emphasis on ‘little’—until I graduated. I was going to change it, but then there wasn’t time, and then when there was time, there wasn’t any money. So . . . yeah.” She slides her hands around my waist. “I hope it isn’t too much of a boner killer.”
“Ain’t nothin’ that could kill the boner I have for you,” I admit. “Though this might be close.”
She giggles, and the sound is so sweet and lovely that it makes me ache all over again. Just bein’ in her presence makes me hard. God, I love this woman.
“Maybe just close your eyes,” she murmurs, and tucks her head against my chest again.
“Nah. I’d miss out on gettin’ to look at you.” I smooth my hand down her silky hair. “I thought I’d lost you. Thought you were gone for good.”
“Absolutely not. Remember that our contract states that I’m at your disposal.”
That fuckin’ contract. “I’m sorry I made you sign it. I shoulda came to you and just asked you out on a date, like a normal person.”
Her hands smooth up and down my back, the soft motion both soothing and erotic all at once. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I don’t have my share of normal people in my life. I probably wouldn’t have understood the question.”
I chuckle.
“I wouldn’t have left you,” she tells me in a gentle voice. “Never. I’ve actually been scared for the last few weeks that you’re the one tired of me, and I’ve been wondering how I’m going to cope when you send me away again.”
“You crazy?” I tighten my arms around her, wonderin’ how I’m gonna manage to get this dress off her without distractin’ her from her thoughts. “I’ve been in love with you all over again since you kissed me in the limo and let me know how mad you were about it.”
“I’m glad you say that,” Nat admits with a sigh. “Because I’ve been in love with you all over again since the beginning, and I thought I was being too clingy.”
“You were?” I frown. “You cried after we had sex.”
“Well, yeah,” she admits, and pokes my side. “You rather ungraciously pointed out that you’d paid me to have sex, and here I was all in love with you again, and it made me feel guilty.”
I groan. I probably did say that. “I’m not real smooth with words, Nat. You might have noticed that.”
“I might have,” she teases. “You might have also noticed that I tend to not ask questions, and then I get my feelings hurt without telling you how I truly feel.”
“That did occur to me.” I rub a hand up and down her back. “So basically what I’m hearin’ is that we’re both shit at communicatin’.”
“I believe that to be an accurate statement, yes.”
“Maybe we should work on that,” I tell her. I glance around her room and spot a pen on the dresser beside her bed. Pressing a kiss atop her head, I pull away from her arms and pick it up. I sit on the edge of the bed, and when she moves to stand closer to me, I take her hand in mine. “I don’t know if you noticed, but for a while, I was writin’ things on my hand so I wouldn’t forget how to act.”
“I remember,” she tells me. “I saw a S and a R. I wondered what they were for.”
“The R was for ‘ruthless’ because I decided I was gonna be ruthless about gettin’ you in my bed. And the S was for ‘scoundrel,’ because Knox suggested I be one. Said that I should be mean and not care about your feelings in this contract I made you sign. That I was gonna use you to get what I wanted and not care somehow.” I shake my head. “Shitty advice.”
“Maybe you don’t ask your single brother for advice about women,” Nat teases, smiling.
I nod. “Thing is, I couldn’t be mean to you. You’ve always just been so sweet and perfect and exactly what I wanted, and every time I tried to be ruthless, it never worked out. I ain’t cut out to be a scoundrel.” I take the pen and draw a tiny heart on her knuckle. “All I know how to do is be in love with you.”
“That’s not such a terrible thing,” she tells me breathlessly. “So do I get to write a message on your hand?”
I hand her the pen. “Go for it.”
She takes my fist in her hand and begins to delicately write something. It’s just a few lines, and when she releases me, I’m a little surprised to see an E there. “E?”
“Because you’re my everything,” she admits softly. “And you need to remember that.”
I groan. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I take the pen from her hand and put it back down on the dresser, then pull her close. “I love you, Nat.”
“I love you, too, Clay.” Her smile is happy, gentle.
I lean in and give her a light kiss. “Way I see it, you’ve got two choices.”
“Oh?”
“You can let me fuck you hard and dirty here on your bed, but you’ve got to be quiet,” I tell her, and slide a hand up her skirt to cup her ass. “Or we can go out to my car, drive down the road about a mile and pull over, and then I can fuck you hard and dirty there and hope the cops don’t stop to pay a visit.”
“Mmm. Choices, choices.” She shifts her weight, and her ass brushes against my hand. Little tease. “I think I’m going to go with the bed in here. It looks like it needs a little dirtying up, don’t you think?”
I like the way she thinks. “You sure you’re gonna be able to stay quiet?”
“If not, you’ll just have to shove something in my mouth, won’t you?” Her eyes gleam.
I pull her forward and bury my face against her tits again, stifling my groan. “You are the naughtiest thing ever, Natalie Weston. I love that about you.”
“You love everything about me,” she says lightly, a slight wobble in her voice.
“I do,” I tell her. “Don’t you ever think I don’t. I loved you from the moment I saw you. I loved you even when I thought you hated me. I loved you then and I love you now. Don’t think I know how to not love you.”
“I love you, too,” she whispers.
“So, so much.”
I pull her down next to me. “Then you ain’t gonna mind if I pull this skirt of yours up and test-drive my new beard? It’s grown in quite a bit.”
She shivers. “Let’s check things out, shall we?” Her hand goes to my jaw, and she feels it, pretending to consider the length. “It seems acceptable,” she tells me after a moment. “Maybe not as good as before, but acceptable.”
“That just means my tongue will have to work a little harder,” I tell her, and get to my feet. My cock’s already respondin’ to this playful talk between us, hard and pressin’ against the front of my jeans. I ignore it, though. Not when I’ve got Nat ready to let me go down on her in this fluffy monstrosity of a bed. I ain’t gettin’ my nut until she’s come at least once. I wanna see if she can be as quiet as she thinks she can, because, from my experience? Nat don’t know how to be quiet when she’s in bed.
Which is . . . pretty damn fun. I wanna break that control she thinks she has, too. So when she beams up at me, all gorgeous and soft, I lean and give her a quick kiss and then say, “Get on your hands and knees.”
Her cheeks flush immediately, which is just the prettiest damn thing. “What?”
“Hands and knees,” I repeat, grinning.
“But I thought we were going to—”
“Oh, we are. Trust me on that.”
She bites her lip and her face seems to be an even brighter red. “From behind?” she asks, scandalized.
“Absolutely. You chicken?”
“Of you having your face in my privates? No. Don’t be silly.” But she can’t quite keep her bluster together. She gets to her feet, smooths her skirts, and then climbs on the bed on hands and knees, and looks over her shoulder at me.
“Now, remember,” I drawl. “Gotta stay quiet. Don’t wanna be found out.”
“I know!”
I grab the hem of her skirt and begin to slowly drag it up her thighs. She shivers, and I can tell she’s got gooseflesh. She’s practically trembling with anticipation.
I am the luckiest son of a bitch ever to have this woman. Humbled by that realization, I vow that she’s gonna get two orgasms from me goin’ down on her, not just one. She deserves a hundred, but I suspect she’ll be squirmin’ off the bed by the time I get two out of her.