“As if that really—” The door to North’s room creaked as it pulled open and shut, the voices disappearing. I traced their path down the hallway, straining my ears.
I stood close, my ear pressed against the wooden door, and listened.
“…will you do when the city is destroyed?” North asked.
“If we keep Auster in the Serpentine Channel, it won’t even come to that,” Oliver said.
“Fine, but even if you hold them there, what will you do about Saldorra marching from the west?” North said. “Dividing the Wizard Guard is a terrible idea—you won’t have anyone left here to defend the city, especially if Dorwan takes it upon himself to pay the queen a visit.”
“If you believe that, then why won’t you stay and fight?” Oliver demanded. “You criticize our methods of leadership, and yet you won’t lift a hand to aid us?”
“I did help you. I brought you everything you needed to stop this war,” North said, “but it obviously meant nothing coming from a dirty, unranked vagrant.”
“Wayland,” Hecate said, her voice hard. “Now is the time for you to come back, don’t you see? Everything will be forgiven.”
“No!” North said. “I didn’t come back here for you, or for this life. How many times do I have to tell you that?”
“You’re doing your father a great dishonor,” she said severely.
“As far as I’m concerned, I’m the only one doing his memory justice,” North shot back. “He would have done everything in his power to deal peacefully with this threat.”
“Really, Wayland?” Oliver asked, sneering. “Auster is no more of a threat to the people of Palmarta than the girl you’ve brought here.”
I tensed, my heart giving a strange lurch.
“She has nothing to do with this,” North said.
“Don’t think we didn’t realize what she was the moment we both saw her,” Oliver said. “Other wizards may not be powerful enough to sense it, but unfortunately for you, we are.”
“Oh, how foolish of me,” North said. “How could I ever forget how very powerful you are, Ollie?”
“You know what we’ve done with her kind in the past,” Hecate said. “I thought at first that you were bringing her to me to use in the war. That kind of power would devastate Auster’s armies.”
“Sorry to ruin your plans,” North said, “but I’ve been sorting out the threads of her magic since the first day I met her. It’s not as simple as you would think. She radiates magic, yes, but all the different kinds are knotted together, so she can’t necessarily control the effect she’ll have on the world. I’ve closed off most of her ability to use it, willingly or not. She’s no danger or use to you, not anymore.”
My mind, or at least the portion that wasn’t slowly spinning it all together, was telling me to stop listening. To turn and walk back down the stairwell, to leave before I learned the full truth.
“All you’ve done is repress her magic,” Hecate said. “A single wizard can’t strip that type of power, Wayland. She’s not like us. She doesn’t just channel magic; she creates it—is it. You must understand why the Guard has handled things the way they did in the past. The jinxes were detected and put to death before the age of seven, when their magic would have manifested.
“Does she even know?” Hecate continued. “Does she know what she is, or have you kept that from her, too?”
“She doesn’t,” North said. “And I’ll skin the both of you alive if you tell her.”
Oliver laughed. “Oh, this is too good! The dumb thing follows you around like a lovesick puppy, and she’s never put it together?”
I cringed, shrinking away until Hecate’s voice caught me and held me there.
“That’s unfair, Oliver,” she said. “How could she possibly know? Most wizards wouldn’t recognize the magic, let alone a human. I’m assuming that’s what the duel with Genet was about? And the quake that followed?”
“I had to fight,” North’s voice was strained. “She releases so much magic into the world that it draws other magic to her, and there hasn’t been a wizard who’s been able to resist it.”
“I felt I had to touch her,” Hecate said. “Even with the bracelet, I could still sense it, weakened as it was.”
“Yes, and I noticed how well you resisted it, Mother.”
“You touch her all the time,” Oliver snapped. “It’s disgusting how little restraint you have.”
“Because I want to, not because I feel compelled to! There is a difference!”
“Wayland,” Hecate said. “I’ll use her, or I’ll end her life—either way, she will not leave this city until I’ve made my decision.”
North was practically pleading now. “Magister helped me create a lock. I’ve been strengthening it over the past few days, making sure that no one else can sense her power. It’s contained completely. She’s not any danger to Provincia!”
I could hear Hecate’s sharp breath, even through the thick wood. “That is highly unsafe, Wayland! If the lock breaks, all of the repressed magic will spill out—who knows what disaster that would create!”
“She’s created very few disasters,” North said sharply. “A drought, a quake, a storm, and a landslide—that’s it. And the only reason they came about was because she was upset!”
“So she stubs a toe and creates a whirlwind?” Oliver said scathingly. “Tell me how that isn’t unnatural or dangerous?”
“That’s not—!” North began fiercely.
“The truth is, my son, that you were irresponsible in taking this on,” Hecate said severely. “You don’t know what kind of destruction she’s capable of—no one does! How many have died or lost their homes and possessions in the towns you’ve passed through? Do you even know if the magic you’re using on her is causing her pain? Will repressing her magic kill her? Or, worse, kill you?”
I couldn’t breathe. My vision had blurred, and my throat constricted. This couldn’t be real—whoever that girl was, she wasn’t me.
“I don’t—” North tried again.
“Exactly, you don’t. You’re no less of a child than she is, full of pride. You never stopped to consider her once in all of this!”
“Of course he wouldn’t have,” Oliver said. “I know very little about jinxes, but I do know the legend. Their blood heals all kinds of things, doesn’t it? Especially curses.”
“Did you try it?” Hecate asked eagerly. “Did you see if her blood would help with your curse?”
There was a very long silence, and then, faintly, “Yes.”
I flung myself away from the door, scorched by my own foolishness. Pascal and North talking in Arcadia—the bloody handkerchief he never let me wash. The tears that dripped down my cheeks burned; every part of my body felt as if it was on fire. I couldn’t get away fast enough.
“The amount of blood I would need to cure the curse would kill her.”
I stumbled down the steps, trying to control my thoughts long enough to find the way out of the castle—out of Provincia—as far away as I could get.
Why me? It all made sense, as if the final piece of the riddle had fallen into place. Every piece had been right in front of me, but I had trusted North too much to put them together. I had to find a way out, to get away from the wizards—away from what they would do to me and what I could do to them.
I continued downstairs, and when my steps finally slowed, I didn’t know where I was. Surrounding me was a sea of white pillars, no doubt supporting the castle above. Everything was dark and still, save for the steady drip of water. Somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn. I would have to retrace my steps to find my own way out. Unless there were side passages that led to the shipyard.
No sooner had I taken another step than there was a sharp tug on my arm. I looked down past my shoulder, expecting to find a gloved hand, but there was only air and nothing else. I moved forward again, but something kept me there with an invisible grip on my wrist. I tried wrenching my arm free. Every other
part of my body could move, but it was as though an invisible rope had chained me to the nearest wall.
I took a step back and my bracelet made a light tinkling sound as my arm fell limply to my side. My bracelet, which seemed to glow unnaturally in the torchlight. My bracelet, which I cherished.
My bracelet, which had been given to me by North.
I sagged against the nearest pillar. I stared at the silver chain, the three perfect stones—so beautiful that they might not have been of this world—and touched it gently. There was no clasp to undo the chain around my wrist. I turned it around, searching. I had never noticed, because before that moment, I hadn’t thought to take it off.
It was too small to pull off over my hand, and the chain was too strong to simply break. The more I pulled, the warmer it seemed to become. I finally recognized the presence of magic for what it was and began to cry. Really cry, from deep inside my chest, the sobs clawing their way out. And when that wasn’t enough, when I felt like I would be crushed by the weight of it all, I looked at the dripping ceiling and let out a silent scream.
What else did this bracelet do? Why had he given it to me—why had I just accepted it, without another thought?
“How…stupid,” I sobbed. I pressed my hands to my face. How incredibly stupid you are, Sydelle.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
I waited for the dark to settle in before moving again. My knees hurt from hugging them tightly to my chest, but I had been on the cold, wet floor for so long that every other part of me was numb. Even the ache in my heart had lessened from a stabbing pain to a dull, heavy throb.
I stood unsteadily, looking around. The smoldering torches lit the water at my feet, showing me the path out. There was another stone archway at the opposite end of the chamber that looked as if it led into another room—perhaps even a passage to the outside. If I could escape the invisible chain holding me back, I would have a good chance of finding a way to leave the castle. It seemed a better idea than going through the same door by which I had come in. Less chance of running into someone.
I went forward tentatively, bracing myself for a sharp yank back…but there was no resistance at all. I took a step, and then another, and another.
I was free from whatever had been holding me back before. I moved quickly, so much more lightly than a moment earlier, splashing through the dirty water toward the other archway. I can do this, I thought. I’m going to be fine. I will be alone, but I will be fine.
“Syd?”
The voice that echoed through the chamber was laced with incredulity and relief. My body lurched to a halt. With that single word, my heart suddenly constricted, the blissful nothingness gone. All I could feel was hurt, and then, suddenly, a hot flash of anger that raced down my spine and curled my toes.
“Did you get lost down here?” he asked, laughing. “I’ve been looking for you all day! Come on, we’ve missed dinner.”
I couldn’t turn around—I wouldn’t. I was one of Mr. Monticelli’s little glass animals, teetering at the very edge of a shelf, waiting to fall and smash into a thousand pieces. I took a deep, calming breath and continued walking.
“Where are you going?” North called.
I walked faster, feeling the first burn of tears. Unfortunately, North was walking faster, too. His long strides overtook mine in a moment, and he blocked my path with a look of annoyance. When his hands reached out to touch me, to stop me, I shattered, like one of the glass animals.
“Don’t touch me!” I yelled. “Don’t look at me, don’t talk to me—just leave me alone!” I pushed him away with all my strength. North stumbled back a few paces, but recovered quickly and seized my shoulders before I could fight back.
“What’s wrong?” he asked. “Did something happen? Did someone hurt you?”
I struggled to pull out of his grip, fighting the urge to scream. “I think you know exactly what you did.”
“I left because of that other man!” North said. “I don’t know why you had to hang all over him like that.”
I shook my head in disbelief. “I don’t believe you.”
“If that’s not it, then what?” North cried.
“Explain to me again,” I said, “why it was that you chose me.”
Even in the faint light I could see the color drain from North’s face.
“I told you,” he began weakly. “I needed an assistant.”
“So it wasn’t because you wanted to study me?” I asked, unable to stop the tears from filling my eyes.
“What are you—?”
“It wasn’t because I was a jinx,” I repeated, “and you wanted to use my blood?”
North’s hands released me. He opened and closed his mouth wordlessly.
“You really had me, you know.” I took a step back. “I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t heard the words come out of your own mouth.”
“What did you hear?” he demanded.
“I heard everything!” I cried. “You want my blood? You want a fresh sample? Isn’t that what Pascal said? Then take it if you want it so badly!”
He stared at me, horrified, but unable to deny any of it.
As I turned to go, he grabbed my arm and spun me back around. I tried to pull free, but he held me in a crushing grip.
“Don’t you dare walk away from me,” he shouted. “Not after everything!”
“Everything? Everything was a lie!” I said. “You said you came to Cliffton to give us rain, but it was because you sensed me, wasn’t it? All I ever wanted from you was the truth, and you couldn’t even give me that!”
“I’m sorry,” he said desperately. “I never meant to hurt you. I needed to try, to see if there was any hope left for me. I didn’t want to bring you here, Syd. I didn’t want to even try to break the curse anymore. After you ran away, all I wanted to do was take care of you, I swear.”
I would have given him my blood, I would have given him anything, if he had ever asked. All I could do was shake my head.
His grip on my arm tightened as he hauled me closer. For a single, stupid instant I thought he might try to kiss me. Instead, he simply pinned me there, staring into my eyes.
“All of those people, North,” I said. “All of those homes and families…How could you take me to those cities, knowing that I could destroy them?”
“If I had told you that you were the cause of those storms, would it have made it any better?” he asked. “Would it have lessened your hurt or guilt? How do you feel now, knowing that you inadvertently caused your entire village to suffer for years? I never wanted you to feel that kind of pain.”
“But it’s still my fault, if I hadn’t—”
“If you hadn’t been born?” North said. “Syd, there was nothing you could have done about this! It is not your fault, and it has never been. Your powers, like the power of all magic users, manifested themselves when you were around seven years old. I believe those new powers fed into and worsened the dry conditions that already existed, so instead of a quake or storm, a drought occurred. You didn’t ask for it or even recognize it.”
“You should have told me from the beginning!” I pressed my hands to my face, taking in a shuddering breath. People had died because of that drought. My parents, my grandparents, my friends—all of my loved ones had suffered from constant hunger and fear that they’d be forced to leave their homes. And why? Because I had been born with this curse, because I was that random anomaly in nature. Just by existing, I had caused them to suffer.
I felt like throwing up more than anything. Leaning forward, I braced myself against one of the pillars.
“How did I do it?” I demanded. “What did I do to cause all those horrible things to happen?”
“It’s…complicated,” he said. “You have a kind of web of magic around you. You let off magic, rather than channel it for use. Before I was able to find a way to restrain it, your presence disrupted the natural balance of magic in the world, and when you were angry or upset, you let off more magic than usual
, and it would set off a storm or a quake.”
I shook my head. “Is that the real reason why all of the jinxes have been killed in the past? Tell me, if it hadn’t been for your curse, if you hadn’t needed a cure, would you have killed me when you realized what I was?”
“Syd, no!” he said, taking my arm again. “How could you think that?”
“I don’t know what to think!” I said. “I trusted you! If you had told me this before, I would have known to control my emotions, but instead you kept it secret, so you could do your little tests with my blood—”
I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye, a flash of dark purple in the pillars behind us. North must have seen it, too, because it broke his concentration long enough for me to pull away.
“Is someone there?” North called angrily. His only reply was his own voice, echoing back to him. For a moment we stood there staring at each other, breathing heavily.
“And this bracelet?” I asked, feeling stronger now that I was away from him. “What does it really do?”
North took a deep breath. “It suppresses your magic so that other wizards aren’t able to detect it.”
“What else?” I demanded. His eyes fell to the ground, as if he couldn’t bear to look at me.
“I put a spell on the bracelet to tie you to me. You won’t be able to go more than a certain distance away from me.”
“So I’m your slave after all, then? Only now you’ve added the chain.”
“That’s not true!” he said sharply. “I put it on you so you couldn’t be carried away or hurt by another wizard!”
“Which makes me nothing more than your property,” I said. “Property you don’t want anyone else to use before you can.”
“Is that really your opinion of me? Do you think I’m some kind of monster, that that’s the only way I think about you?”
“No, but you think I’m a monster,” I said. “To be toyed with and manipulated. How dare you treat me this way? You’re no better than Dorwan!”
Even as the words left my mouth, I regretted them. North took a step back, his face hardening into fury.