I managed to make it through the rest of September that way, most of October too. I kept my head down when they were near and shifted my focus to my friends and schoolwork. I might have started flirting a little with Arianna, but it was just to ease the heartache, and it was never anything serious, no more than how Arianna often flirted with me. I’d toss my arm over her shoulders when Raquel walked by. I’d lean in close to tell her something when Raquel was watching us across the cafeteria. It irritated Nika, and I hoped it wasn’t leading Arianna on, but seeing the flash of jealousy in Raquel’s eyes was almost addicting. It made my long days of watching her with Russell…bearable.
I was waiting for Starla after school one afternoon with Nika, Trey, and Arianna, when Raquel’s jealousy finally seemed to get the better of her. Arianna and I were sitting on the steps leading to the library, the long overhang of the building protecting us from the rain that had started. Arianna was sitting on the step right behind me, her legs on either side of me as I leaned back into her body. My head was resting on her stomach and she was trailing her fingers through my hair in a repetitive pattern that was surprisingly peaceful. I knew the way we were sitting was couple-like, but when she’d pulled me into her, I hadn’t been able to resist. Nika was upset; I could feel the disapproval coming off her in waves.
My sister had asked me several times to stop flirting with her friend. She’d tell me, “If you don’t like her, don’t encourage her.” But the thing was…I did like Arianna. Maybe not in that way, not in the way I liked Raquel, but I enjoyed being around her. We’d had a lot of quiet conversations since she’d helped me get through my torment at the movie theater, and I found myself looking forward to talking to her. And if I was honest, I looked forward to flirting with her too. It felt really…nice. Although, I supposed that was a habit I needed to break. Before Arianna got hurt.
Just as I was thinking that I should move away from Arianna, Raquel walked by. She did a double take when she noticed the way we were sitting on the steps, and a flash of something dark and vindictive spiked in me. How does it feel? I initially wanted to push the bitter feeling back, but it was better than pain, so I welcomed it instead, and stayed where I was on Arianna’s lap. She sighed with contentment while Raquel seemed torn.
Surprising me, Raquel stopped and stepped under the overhang with my group. Looking at the students lingering nearby, she muttered, “Hey, Julian.”
Staying where I was, I watched her every move. “Hey, Raquel.”
Arianna, maybe feeling a little possessive, rested her hand on my chest. I thought to remove it, but the look of dismay on Raquel’s perfect face lifted my heart, gave me a burst of painful hope. Was she upset at the idea of me having moved on? Did that mean she still cared about me? Still considered me…a maybe?
Arianna’s heart started increasing as she stroked her fingers over my chest. I knew I should stop her, move away from her, but with Raquel openly staring at me, I couldn’t move; I could barely breathe. I hadn’t said more than two words to Raquel since the closet incident, and this was the longest we’d looked at each other in a long time. Nika wasn’t happy about Raquel being here, about the swarm of feelings resurfacing in my chest, but for now she was holding her tongue. I didn’t know how much longer that would last.
Raquel pointed at Arianna and me. “Are you guys going to the Halloween party at Derrick’s tonight?”
Adrenaline shot through me. She was asking about my plans? She hadn’t done that since before Russell and I had gotten into it at the beginning of the year. Even though I was euphoric, I acted like it was no big deal. “Probably not. You?”
Raquel shrugged and tucked a dark lock of her hair behind her ear. It revealed a long, shapely neck that both sides of my nature longed for. “Yeah…Russell wants to go.”
She frowned after she said it, and I resisted every instinct I had to comfort her, to tell her that she could do better than Russell, to tell her that Arianna and I were just friends…to tell her that I still wanted her. But being distant from her was drawing her closer, so I didn’t say anything that was in my heart. Knowing she was waiting for some shred of hope that I would be there, I told her, “I’m sure you guys will have a good time.” Not wanting to sound callus, I smiled and added, “Actually, I hope you have a great time.”
She nodded at me, eyeing Arianna uneasily. “Thank you. I guess I should go. I hope…I hope you change your mind and come.”
She spun on her heel and walked away, seemingly flustered and embarrassed. Confusion welled in me as I watched her leave. I hope you change your mind and come? She wanted me to go to the party. Was she changing her mind about Russell? About me? About us?
I tried to sit up, but Arianna’s grip on me tightened. Just as I was beginning to think that maybe I’d already misled Arianna, Nika snapped, “Mom’s here, Julian.” Her voice was as prickly as her mood.
I glanced over at her narrowed eyes, then turned to see Starla’s car pulling into the lot. Arianna sighed as she let me go. Hopping up, I grabbed my bag. I wasn’t sure what to do with Arianna now, since we’d somehow shifted our flirting into something more than causal; I hadn’t meant to. Most of the time, I just followed her lead. Bouncing to her feet, Arianna said, “Are you sure you don’t want to go to that party tonight? I think it could be fun.” She gave me a small smile that was almost shy. It was…kind of adorable.
Confusion tore through me as I looked at her; had she always been this pretty, or had she done something to herself in the last several weeks? New haircut? Different makeup? “I don’t…I don’t know,” I told her. I’m not really a party person…or a costume person.”
Nika muttered, “Or an honest person.”
None of the humans heard my sister, but I glared at her anyway. Starla honked her horn at us, and Arianna sighed again, then gave me a radiant smile. “Have a good weekend, Julian, and call me, if you need to talk about…anything. I’m here for you.” She turned her smile to my sister. “I’ll talk to you later, Nika.”
She bounded away, nearly skipping; her kind words left a warmth hovering over my chest. I’m here for you. I’d never heard anyone but my family say that to me.
Just as I was about to head off to my “mom’s” car, Trey grabbed my arm. His face oddly serious, he said, “You were joking, right? You are going to that party tonight, aren’t you? It’s gonna be huge, Julian.”
I glanced over at the direction Raquel had taken, and again, confusion roiled within me. Should I let her comment go? I hope you change your mind and come. With a sigh, I finally told him, “Yeah, I’ll be there.”
He smacked my shoulder in approval as Nika stormed off, ticked now. I sighed, said goodbye to Trey, and followed her. Catching up, I asked, “Why are you mad?”
She spun in the rain to face me. “You’ve been flirting with Arianna for weeks. I think in the beginning, it was just to get a rise out of Raquel, but now… I feel how happy you are when you’re around her, Julian. And maybe it was stupid of me, but I thought you were actually starting to like her. But with the way you got all confused and hopeful when Raquel invited you to that party…well, it’s obvious that nothing has changed. It’s still all about Raquel. And now you’re blowing off Arianna to be with her? You got Arianna’s hopes up, just like I asked you not to, and now you’re dumping her, like some jackass, lamo…guy! Is that who you want to be, Julian?” she asked.
Her biting tone got under my skin; it also struck a nerve. She might have a point, not that I was going to concede that while she was snapping at me. “A guy? Yeah, I would like to be a guy, because, if you hadn’t noticed, I am a guy!”
Starla honked her horn again as Nika stood still as stone in the rain. Beads of it collected in her hair. Maybe it was my imagination, but I could almost hear the drops sizzling in her anger. “Don’t be a guy…be a man. If you don’t want to be with Arianna, then leave her alone. She deserves better.”
She spun again, leaving me standing alone in the rain. Shame pelted me as I watc
hed Nika slam Starla’s door shut. She was right. I liked Arianna, in the friendly sort of way, and she did deserve better—she deserved someone amazing, like she was. Someone who thought the sun rose and set with her. I would tell her. The next time I saw her, I would sit her down and be brutally honest with her. I liked her as a friend, but that was it…so the flirting needed to stop. I didn’t want to hurt her like Raquel had so often hurt me.
Head down, I trailed after my sister. Starla spun out of the lot before I even got my door closed all the way. She immediately took Nika to the library, since she spent every day after school there on her still-secret dates with Hunter. As Nika exited the car, I muttered, “I’m sorry, Nick. I’ll tell her I don’t see her that way. I’ll leave her alone.”
Nika paused. Face still stony, anger washing up and down her body, she nodded stiffly, then slammed the door shut. I sighed, and Starla chuckled as she pulled away. “Score one for Nika…she owned your ass back there.” She popped a bubble with her gum, her gaze locked on mine in the rearview mirror. “Serves you right for being a prick.”
Closing my eyes, I leaned my head back on the seat and wished I could magically teleport like so many vampires in the movies could. That would be a much handier super power than excessively good hearing.
Starla took me home next, and seeing Ben’s rental car in the drive made me sigh. If he was there, then Liv was there too, and I felt like I’d been fawned over enough for one day. Thanking Starla for her parental duties, I opened the front door and stepped inside. By the response, you’d think I was a soldier returning from the war.
“Julian!”
Liv’s arms cinched around me, and I struggled to breathe. For such a young girl, she was exceptionally strong. Coughing, I removed my bag from my shoulder and held it out. “Hey, Liv, you want to give me a hand and run my bag to my room?”
She brightened and nodded her head so hard I thought she might give herself whiplash. “Sure thing, Julian.” She had my bag halfway up the steps before I could even tell her thank you. I peeked over to the living room, to see if Ben would scold me for using his daughter like that, but Ben wasn’t in there. Tuning in, I heard him talking to someone in the kitchen.
“I’m at Teren’s now. When he gets home, we’ll go check it out. Like I said, I’m not as good at spotting these as you, but better safe than sorry.”
Curious, I tiptoed into the room. Ben was frowning, cell phone to his ear, while he hunched over the kitchen table. There was an open laptop, but I couldn’t see the screen from where I was. The table was covered in newspapers; they all seemed to be opened to the classifieds section. Ben’s finger traced lines over the black print as the person on the other line spoke to him. “What about the one I showed you last night? Were you able to follow up on it?”
Ben sighed, closing his eyes. “We were too late. I cleaned up the best I could, but—”
A floorboard creaked under my weight, and I stopped moving. Even though he was human, Ben heard me and stopped explaining. The voice on the other end heard me too. “Is someone there, Ben? Is it Teren?”
Straightening, Ben locked gazes with me. “No…Julian.”
“Ah, I see. I’ll let you deal with that then.”
The line disconnected, and Ben set his phone down. Wondering how to explain to the adult before me that I was spying, I slapped on a smile. “Hey, Ben. You, uh…looking for a job?”
Ben gave me a business-like smile. “Something like that. I didn’t hear you come in.” He snapped the laptop shut.
Shrugging, I walked over to the table and examined the slew of papers; a handful of the classifieds were circled in red. “Sorry, I was just hungry…wanted to get something to eat but didn’t want to bug you.”
Ben nodded and started cleaning up the newspapers as I tried to read the details of some. They seemed like random Help Wanted listings. Maybe he really was looking for a job. He’d been here a while, helping Gabriel with his super-secret L.A. type problem. A problem that none of the adults would discuss around any of us kids.
Wondering if he’d slip up while he was preoccupied with cleaning, I asked, “Was that Gabriel on the phone?” Ben stopped collecting papers and glanced at me. “It sounded like him,” I added.
Shaking his head, Ben quickly swept away the rest of the mess. “Your hearing never ceases to amaze me.” Folding the papers into a more manageable pile, he met my eye. “Yeah, that was Gabriel.”
Determined to get some answers, I crossed my arms over my chest. “And what did he want? What exactly did he show you last night, and what did you have to ‘clean up’?”
Ben stared at me a moment, weighing me. Then he flashed a smile that made the women melt, or so I’d been told. “Don’t worry about it, kid. Your dad and I have it under control.”
“Didn’t sound like it. It sounded like you were too late. It sounded like you needed help.” I snatched the pile of papers from him, lightning fast. “What are these about?”
Ben blinked, then snatched the papers back from me. “I know you want to help, Julian, you and Nika both, but your parents have asked for you two to not be involved…and I have to respect that.” Running a hand through his highlights, he let out a weary exhale. “I’m sorry, I can’t tell you anything.”
He tucked the newspapers under some books on the counter, hiding the last of the “Services Needed” postings. He gave me a blank look that all adults give children when they aren’t going to budge on something. It irritated me. I wasn’t a kid anymore, and I didn’t need to be sheltered.
I felt Nika’s buoyant mood start to shift toward curiosity as Ben and I stared each other down. The mounting tension in the room was only broken by Olivia, who burst around the corner and attached herself to my body. “I put your bag away, Julian!” Her cheeks were rosy as her bright face searched mine like I had all the answers to life’s most important questions. “Can I do anything else for you?”
Ben raised an eyebrow. Not tearing his gaze from me, he asked his daughter, “You’re doing chores for him?”
I cringed as Liv twisted to face her dad. “Just little ones.”
Ben put a hand on her shoulder. “You don’t have to do that.” He shifted to cup her cheek. “I’m going to take you to the airport in the morning, so you can go visit your mom for a while. Why don’t you go get your stuff together?”
Liv frowned and looked back at me. “I don’t want to go.”
Ben sighed and pulled her in for a hug. “I don’t want you to go either, sweetheart, but Mom misses you, and you’ve missed too much school.” His eyes were moist when he pulled away from her. Tucking a golden lock of hair behind her ear, he told her, “But if I’m not done here soon, I’ll have Mom send you back for a visit, okay?”
While Ben had been staying here with us, he and Tracey had been shuffling Olivia back and forth. It was hard on her, to be shuttled around, flown from one parent to the other. But Ben got antsy when she was away from him for too long. I’d heard him tell Dad that not everyone in San Francisco appreciated his services. He was worried that some ticked off vampire would harm his daughter…or his wife. Even though Ben was devoted to my family, even though he’d left mixed-vampire bodyguards behind to watch over his loved ones, being here was a struggle for him. I could see the weariness all over his features. One more reason he should let my sister and me help. All hands on deck.
Olivia nodded sadly before trudging out of the room. Standing, Ben faced me. “She adores you, Julian. Please don’t make her do things for you.” With those words, he grabbed the laptop, books, and papers, and left me alone in the kitchen.
Nice. I’d been reprimanded for using two girls today. Well, wasn’t I turning into a full-fledged dick. Pretty soon, I’d be cornering guys in the locker room and roughing up my girlfriend. No. No, I’d never do that.
Before too long, my parents came back home with Nika. She was bubbly, having spent a good chunk of her afternoon with Hunter. My parents were still in the dark about that. They just ass
umed that Nika had a love of books that bordered on obsession. During dinner, Nika brought up our spat after school. “Hey, sorry to snap at you earlier.”
Mom and Dad were in a conversation with Ben, both of them pretending to eat the bits of food on their plate, since Olivia was seated to my left, watching everything. Undead vampires couldn’t eat human food anymore. I wasn’t sure what would happen if they did, but Mom had hinted once that it wasn’t pretty.
“It’s okay, you were right,” I told her.
She smiled brighter. Like most girls, Nika loved hearing that she was right. Glancing at Mom and Dad, she asked, “So, are you still…?”
She didn’t finish her question since our parents were in earshot, but I knew what she was referring to—she wanted to know if I was still going to go to that Halloween party with Trey. Honestly, I’d put it from my mind once I’d gotten home, but, now that she mentioned it… “Yeah, yeah I think so.”
Nika pushed some chicken around her plate, not too thrilled by my answer. She didn’t say anything more though. She couldn’t really. If she outed that I was going to sneak off to some underage drinking party, then I might out her secret boyfriend. And even though Nika and Hunter were taking things slowly, usually only meeting at the library during the week, their friendship was not something Nika wanted to share just yet.
After dinner, Dad and Ben left the house to look into whatever it was Ben had found in the classifieds. Mom seemed worried as she stared out the front windows, playing with the heart locket around her neck. The gold locket opened to reveal baby pictures of Nika and me, along with tiny pictures of Mom and Dad. Dad had given it to Mom when she was pregnant with us; she wore it almost every single day.
I played a board game in the dining room with Olivia while I waited; Nika gabbed with Arianna in her bedroom. I wasn’t quite sure how to sneak out of the house with two supernatural parents. It wasn’t just their hearing that I had to watch out for. No, the blood bond was the real problem. I had an internal GPS spouting my location to them twenty-four-seven. There was a way to turn it off—that was what had happened to me when I was younger—but I didn’t know what the drug was that I’d been dosed with. All I remembered about it was that it had made me sick to my stomach…and it had burned. I’d felt on fire as the shot had moved through my veins.