To make the matter worse, earlier that evening Edin had spoken, unintentionally, that Serenity was beautiful. All could see that she had been on his mind. Another woman had pleased him by just looking at her, and his wife believed she could not. That she was not beautiful enough.
So much spoken with just a few words.
Roughly, Edin wrapped his arm around Anessa and pulled her to him. He let her try not to cry into his shoulder, while he stroked her hair. When the whimpers stopped, he realized she had fallen asleep. Edin stared up at the ceiling and resumed his thoughts of the young woman. Of Serenity.
Chapter 5
The next morning, Anessa reluctantly sent her husband off to his work. To the castle where the woman who claimed his thoughts and eyes resided. Even though Edin knew that he would not see Serenity for some days, when that group of women worked the garden again, his body and heart still felt glad to head toward her, to the place she occupied.
It made him feel guilty. After he kissed Anessa's cheek, who would not look at him, Edin left his home and headed for work.
As the days passed, the men talked of Serenity until she became old news and no one much cared anymore about her. Edin listened, remained silent, and counted down the days in his mind when she would emerge from the castle once again.
But that day did not come. On the morning that Edin knew the rotation was complete, and Serenity's group would work in the gardens again, he was excited and although he did not speak his excitement, he was worried that it showed nonetheless. He showed Anessa a bit more affection, but not too much, so that she wouldn't become suspicious, and he walked along the street with a smile on his face.
"Let me guess, Edin," Cartel said when he spotted Edin's smile. "You are to be a father."
"What? No!" Edin said, appalled. While Cartel laughed at his responses, Edin ignored it and continued his work.
"Something has the boy excited," Cartel mumbled.
The sun was too slow. Edin gauged its place in the sky by the amount of heat on his back, and the shadows it made. When it appeared time for the women to arrive, Edin stood up, pretended to need a drink of water, and watched the castle. He waited, impatient, for figures to move past the wall and into sight. Taking sips, small ones over and over, Edin tried to not appear to be a man infatuated with a woman he had never met. But he could only drink so much without looking foolish.
When the first woman came into view, the dark-skinned one, Edin's breath caught in his throat, the bag of water frozen at his lips. The next came, and a third. Then there came a gap, and Edin assumed Serenity would be joining them in mere moments and that fate was cruelly making him wait a few seconds longer.
But, she did not come.
Nor did she come any other day. All Edin had were his dreams of her at night, and his silly hope that some day she would emerge. Anessa sensed a change, and she was glad for it. No longer did her husband wish to race to work, but instead he moped and appeared saddened, and she relished the job of pleasing him, of making him happy. As any good wife would do.
Serenity appeared when he least expected it. He was hard at work, covered in sweat and dust. His tool was in mid-air when he spotted her walk past them as if they weren't even there. The pick fell from Edin's hand and onto the stone. It made a ringing sound fill the air and the others to jump, startled.
"Edin, what are you...?" Barin asked, but Edin did not hear the rest. He was too lost, too far away. He followed behind Serenity as she walked into town.
As she walked through the village, she looked at everything about her, and ignored the stares of the villagers. Edin watched her just as the villagers watched her. He saw that she was pregnant, because her stomach bulged and her dress stretched out to accommodate. It pained him to see her with child. It also made him envious. When a scion couple congratulated her, Edin caught the emotion in her face. The baby did not make her happy. It made him wonder what kind of a woman did not love her child, when they had always been told that the women of the castle happily gave birth to further Ilmarinen's future.
The scions spoke as if she was one of them. Her beauty confused them.
Edin continued to follow Serenity throughout the city. Not once did she suspect that she was being stalked, and so he stayed pretty close to her, and pretended to be a man on the streets with a purpose, a place to be.
It confused him when he watched her look at the children upon the street, the way she smiled at them. Then how she looked when one of them ran to their mother. At first, Edin thought she was sad that she did not have love for her child, and silently wished she did. But, then the shock coursed through her, surprise so strong that it made her weak. Her wide eyes stayed where the child and mother had stood, although they were now within their home, and Edin quickly began to realize.
Serenity, with her hand upon her stomach, had just learned that her child would be given away. Did she not already know it? Had they all been lied to, to believe that the women gave willingly?
When Serenity ran down the street towards the castle, Edin instinctively chased after her. People looked, but he didn't care. There was nothing that could stop him from following. When she stumbled upon her skirts, and fell to the ground, Edin raced to her and when he reached her his hands rested upon her. There was no thought to his actions, just a pure need.
"Are you all right?" he asked.
"Yes, thank you," she said, and she tried to walk away from him. When she stumbled again, his hands moved towards her, and he scooped her up in his arms.
He carried her past his work, past his friends, but he did not look to see how they reacted. Once inside the castle, he headed towards the women's quarters. He had seen the plans, had been building the castle walls, so he knew where he needed to go. Once he reached the hallway, he spotted Dai's young friend, who gave Edin a scared look but silently pointed him to Serenity's door. Again, the fact Edin had no care that so many people saw him with Serenity was a dangerous thing.
It wasn't until he set her upon the bed that she looked at him, acknowledged his presence, and thanked him for his help. She seemed so sad, so helpless. He did not wish to leave her.
"What is your name?" she asked.
He hesitated, but not because giving her his name would further condemn him, but because she spoke to him, no longer lost in her sorrow.
"Edin, my lady." Although he knew she was not a lady of Ilmarinen, he wanted to give her that title.
She repeated his name a couple of times. In Ilmarinen culture, Edin was a term of endearment more than an actual name. Long ago, when Ilmarinen was new and dragons had not ripped it apart, people called loved ones "Eden," a word learned from Lilith herself, who said that it was a special word, a word of love and peace.
"Is that what you are for me?"
"My lady?" he asked, confused.
"A heaven on Earth."
"Heaven, my lady?" To her was Edin a place?
"A place of peace. A heaven for Serenity. Will you give that to me, as your name suggests?"
Although he did not fully understand her, he knew that she hurt. She was broken, and weak. He could not give her what she wanted. He did not understand what that was. But, what he wanted was to melt into her. To be carried about with her wherever she went. And when she was sad, he would show himself to calm her tears, and then melt back into her. He would move within her bones, her veins, pulse like her blood throughout her. And like blood, she would not even sense he was there unless cut, unless hurt, and then he would flow out of her, not to harm her further, but to remind her that she was not alone, that she carried him with her.
"I am sorry, my lady." And he had never felt those words to be so true.
She bade him to leave her be, but as he turned she left him with a few more words.
"I have sold my soul, and there is no one to redeem me," she said, words not directly spoken to him, but to her own misery. He didn't understand half of her words, but he felt her pain.
And it was at that moment that Edin
vowed to save her. To be her Eden. To carry her to peace.
Chapter 6
Back at home, Edin's family greeted him at the door. His mother came at him and hugged him. His wife smiled, but looked shy. Dai looked about to laugh.
"Your wife is now a woman," his mother said, arms still wrapped around him.
Edin tried to look pleased, but he wasn't sure his face conveyed that emotion. Anessa smiled shyly. It was important to be happy at this moment, but it wasn't the kind of thing that a young woman wanted announced in front of everyone. Edin's mother was too excited to care.
"In a few days, you can consummate your marriage," his mother continued. She reached for Anessa's hand and pulled the girl towards Edin. Edin took his wife's hand and tried to smile again.
That night, Edin stared at the door in fear with his head covered by the blanket. He was frightened that one of lord Tanahn's men would come for him, and he was petrified that his wife would come for him.
It was a very long night, and his eyes were still open as the dawn approached.
For the next few days, Edin was paranoid. Every time someone said his name, he would jump a mile. Every touch on his arm startled him. He just knew that at any moment lord Tanahn would be after him for talking to Serenity. So many people had seen him with her. Anessa made him fearful as well. She would give him loving smiles whenever he looked at her, and he was frightened that at any moment she would tell him that she would be in his bed that evening. It made him not want to look at her.
"I know your secret," Dai said, as brother and sister walked through the market.
It was one of the rare days that Edin did not have to work, and he accompanied his sister while she shopped. She had asked him to, and now Edin knew why.
"Secret?"
"You have been acting strangely." She laughed. "And I know it is not a fear of poor performance in the bedroom."
"Dai!" Edin scolded, shocked at his sister's words.
Again his sister laughed. "Shylan told me," she said, her face serious. "That he saw you. Within the castle."
Edin stopped. He closed his eyes, raised his face to the sky, and sighed. Shylan was Dai's young male friend, and the boy that pointed him toward Serenity's quarters within the castle. If he had told Dai, had he told anyone else?
"Do not worry," Dai said. Edin could hear her voice, but he did not open his eyes to look at her. "He will not speak of it to anyone. He only told me because I am his dearest friend."
After he lowered his head, Edin opened his eyes and looked at his sister. She was nearly Anessa's age, and would be wed before long. Shylan was not yet old enough to be wed, as the boys were wed when they were sixteen and old enough to work hard. She would not be given to him, although he could see in her eyes that was what she wanted.
"I know you understand," she said as he looked at her. "How unfair it is. I just wanted you to know that I knew, that we knew. That you are not alone."
"Such a wise young woman."
Dai smiled, a huge smile, and they continued to shop. It was while they looked at an assortment of stones that a messenger rode through the streets, heralding his news. Edin and Dai watched the man as he reared in his horse, and let the crowd gather around him before he spoke.
"It has been decreed, by our great lord and god, Odin, that no longer are plants and stones to be used in the healing of the sick or wounded."
The crowed murmured their shock. Someone yelled out, asking how were they supposed to help their loved ones. The messenger ignored them all.
"You have until sunset to bring every stone and healing plant in your possession to the center of town. There is a well-guarded fire there, where you will destroy your goods. Once the sun sets, there will be a city wide search in every home. Failure to burn your items of healing will result in death. From here on out, any healing will bring your death. As decreed by our lord and god Odin."
Having spoken as he was ordered to, the messenger rode off to the next part of town, where he would deliver his speech again. This law made no sense to Edin. Why would they create such a law? Especially one that would harm their need for a growing and healthy population of people. Edin felt a tug on his sleeve. He looked down at Dai, whose face looked worried and fearful.
"Father."
Edin took his sister's hand and raced off toward their home. Without his medication, their father would not survive. The healer, the woman who loved him, kept them supplied with the items he needed to stay alive, and to function at least a little. As they ran down the street, Edin saw people as they talked about the new law. Many had tears in their eyes. They held their plants and stones in hand.
When they reached their home, the front door was wide open and no one was inside. Dai pointed to the huge bonfire just down the street, and Edin saw his family near it. They rushed over to them, and when their mother saw them, she grasped at both of them to pull them into a hug. She cried openly, and loudly. Anessa was in front of them. She guided Edin's father toward the fire. Edin went to his other side to help steady him as well. In the man's hand, his palm up, was a small stone. It had been given to him by the healer.
Edin's father looked over at his son and smiled.
Anessa cried, but they were quiet tears. They couldn't be sure that the man really knew what he did, as he tossed his stone to the flames, but Anessa kept her cries quiet so that the man would continue to smile. The stone rested among the flames for a moment, and then once it had absorbed too much heat, it burst with a loud popping sound. They stepped back from the fire and returned to the rest of the family.
The family stood together and stared at the fire, while others also burned their chances of survival. It was quiet within the city; the only sounds were of the flames as they ate their way through all they had been offered.
The silence was broken by a scream. It was a scream of both anger and fear. A few men, sent by lord Tanahn, pushed through the crowds with their arms laden with sacks that could only contain the now forbidden plants and stones. Behind the men came the healer, the woman who had loved Edin's father, and had tried to keep him alive. She screamed and begged. For the first time, Dai broke into a sob and buried her face in their father's shoulder.
"Please!" the healer begged, and she dropped to her knees. "I have done no harm to anyone. Why should I be punished so?"
She grabbed at one of the men's arms and tugged. He forcefully tore himself from her grasp, but once he was free, he looked back at the healer with sorrow in his eyes. As the men dumped all her goods into the fire, the multitude of people all cried out. The healer stared at the fire. Her face was red and worn. As the three men passed by, she looked up at them.
"You have just killed nearly half this city," she spat.
"I am sorry," the man who had grabbed her earlier said. "I have an ill child at home." He reached down and offered the woman his hand. She took it, and let him help her rise to her feet. The healer now looked at the man as an equal. He did not want to do as he was ordered. He must have done the same already, tossed away his child's chance to get well. The man started to lead the healer away, but when she saw Edin's family, she pulled away from the man and ran towards them.
"I am so sorry," she cried to Edin's father. Edin could hear his mother's breath catch at the display. The woman dropped to her knees again, and Edin leveled himself with the healer. He tried to get her to stand, but it was the touch of Edin's father, his hand upon the woman's head, that made her rise. She looked into his withered face, and he smiled back at her. Did he see the woman he had loved? Edin didn't know, but he hoped so.
The man from earlier led the healer away and back to her home. Edin and his family returned home as well.
They ate their dinner in silence, and when Edin went to his bed, he was exhausted and his mind was filled with thoughts about the new law. He wondered how much longer his father would survive. He wanted to know what caused their lords to create such a law. And he wanted to see Serenity again.
He was wide awak
e when Anessa entered his room. Edin sat up straight on his pallet and watched her make her way to his bedside. He let her lie down beside him, and he wrapped his arm around her. In his mind, he thought she was an upset girl who needed comfort. He pressed his lips to her brow, and held her close.
"I am ready," she said.
Edin's heart stopped, and he had to fight the urge to push the girl away from him.
"Although it scares me," she whispered, her fingers on his chest. "Not fear of you hurting me, I know you never could. But I fear having a child that I could not take care of if it became ill. This law will not last, will it?"
"I cannot say," Edin said, his voice hoarse.
"I am happy."
"Ah, Anessa, you are a child."
"I am a woman," she said, defiantly. She sounded like Dai.
"But, still a child."
The girl, Edin's wife, cried onto his chest. She begged and pleaded with Edin, asked him to take her, to give her what she waited for. She said that it would finally bring them together as husband and wife. Edin listened, but didn't reply. It was when she said that she felt that if she could give herself to him then he would stop thinking of Serenity, that Edin pushed Anessa from him and held her face in his hands. She looked expectantly at him.
"Is there not someone that you love?" he asked.
"I love you."
"Someone you were not told to love."
"I want to love our child."
He could not hear anymore. Edin got up from his bed and dressed quickly. He could feel Anessa's eyes on him. Without a word to her, he left the house. It was foolish to be out in the middle of the night. There would be so many questions if he were caught. But, despite that, Edin made his way to the castle. He walked past the ashes, all which were left of the city's medicines. Once he reached the castle, he walked around it, and looked up at the windows. He tried to figure out which one belonged to Serenity. A candle blazed in one window, and so he chose that one. Edin sat on the ground, his legs wrapped together, and stared at the light in the window.
He held his breath when he saw a figure move. Someone walked to the castle, but they didn't seem to know that Edin was there. He held perfectly still, but tried to figure out who the person was. It was dark, but the moon shone bright enough that he could make out some features.