It shouldn't be this hard. They were just words. Yet, as Spencer worked to spit them out, he stumbled over his tongue and had already given up more than once. With Kathryn at his side, he'd never throw in the towel. Especially now with how much he stood to lose if he gave up.
The special directors had called everyone together in the den, which made no sense. It was smaller than the living room, had less seating, and with all these TREX agents, no one had enough room to stand without brushing shoulders with someone.
The boy had barely left Dan's side since the two of them had some sort of powwow by the Christmas tree earlier. Now here they all sat or stood, most of the kids in bed-except for Emily, who took after her mother in every way, stubborn streak and all. The adults waited on the leaders of the two divisions to explain why they were stuck in one of the smallest rooms in the entire mansion.
"It's time we explained why you're all here," Malcolm McKoy said as he raised his glass of scotch. "It's to propose a toast."
Judging by the looks they shot each other, the agents didn't believe that for a minute.
"You could have toasted via Skype," Bailey pointed out, her arms crossed as she pouted in the corner.
Dear God above, his daughter would one day be a moody girl. Spencer refused to leave dealing with that on Kathryn alone. He refused to leave anything on her alone. Hell, he refused to leave her alone period. His family needed him. He needed his family even more. The reality of what he had yet to face was debilitating.
"Pipe down," Mitch barked, coming to the aid of his dad and shocking the rest of them. He rarely spoke up in favor of anything TREX. Bailey thinned her lips and thumbed at the screen of her phone.
"TREX is expanding," Dan announced, pulling in the attention. "Frontline will almost double in size."
"Sideline will triple," Malcolm added, his glass still in the air. "Our toast is to congratulate those in this room. You have been chosen to take an active part in the expansion. Each one of you will be a leader in your division."
Spencer snagged David's attention. They'd never agreed to this angle. The younger agents hadn't been on any serious finds. How in the hell were they supposed to lead a team on one?
"Before we reassign duties, we're going to play a little game." Dan didn't do games. He was the opposite of a game player. Game changer, maybe. What the hell was going on? "Each one of us is going to give up something no one else in this room knows." His gaze rested on Spencer, those piercing blue eyes drilling into his resolve.
Oh shit. He knew.
"I hate this agency," Mitch volunteered first.
"Everyone knows that," Dan pointed out, his lips twitching into what Spencer could only describe as the start of a smile. "Got anything else?"
"I don't like you that much, either."
"That means you like him some." Hunter spoke up, surprising several agents. That was the first time he'd volunteered anything, especially to the group.
"Thank you." Dan nodded at the kid.
Hunter grinned wide. "You're welcome."
Holy shit, they'd somehow bonded and become one. Poor kid.
"I'll go." Wayde stood up from the arm of the chair Mia sat in. He turned to Spencer. "I really appreciate the offer, but I don't want to be spec ops. I'm pretty damn happy being a dual agent between the SBI and TREX. I'd have to give that up. I've worked too hard to be a unit lead with the SBI."
"No one gives up an invite to be one of the elite," Kaylee said. "Are you crazy?"
"Give it to someone else," Wayde said and returned to the arm of the chair, his hand searching for Mia's. "I've got everything I need right here."
Spencer nodded in agreement. It disappointed him knowing he'd have to open the position to an agent fresh out of SOLAS, TREX's field training for Special Operations for Land, Air, and Sea, but he understood completely. "Fair enough."
Seth was next. "I want to work in the bioterrorism unit."
"I can make that happen." Dan gave him a firm nod.
"Like hell," Malcolm growled. "No boy of mine is working chemical warfare."
"It's my choice," Seth fired back, clearly stunning his siblings, who all exchanged wide glances. Spencer had to admit, he was taken a bit off guard as well. Seth rarely if ever spoke back. To anyone. "I want to create the vaccines and antibodies needed to fight off the poisons put in dirty bombs. Terrorists are getting more creative. We need to be ready. I can help get us there."
"New rule," Dan jumped in as Malcolm drew in a sharp breath. "No telling someone he's crazy in his choice." He looked at Kaylee. "Or flat out telling him no." He then looked at Malcolm. "This is a way to get to know each other as a team, not tear each other down. Now, who's next?"
"After that pep talk?" Bailey mused, the sarcasm oozing from her tone. When all eyes were on her, she let out a sigh and stood to address the room. "I've decided to move to Seattle. Montana is too far away."
"Too far away from what?" David pushed away from the wall, his spine rigid. "It had better not be because of-"
"Jason," she cut him off. "It is. He's letting me move into his place until I can find something. I heard what Hunter said when he was talking to the director. Christmas is about presence, not presents. We spend so much time worried about material things and push away the things we really want. I want to be with Jason."
Kaylee stepped next to her twin and slid their hands together. "Bails is right. Life is too short to give into our fears." She drew in a deep breath and faced Spencer. "I want to be considered for the position on Team Two."
"You?" Bailey whispered. Her mouth fell open as tears swelled in her eyes. She shook her head, mouthing the word no over and over.
"It's okay, sis. It's okay. I promise it's okay." Kaylee pulled her into her arms. "You're not going to lose me." She grasped Bailey's shoulders and held her gaze, repeating, "You're not going to lose me."
"But spec ops?" She flicked a quick look at Chris before centering on his crutches.
Kaylee spoke, pulling Bailey's attention. "You have to let me do this. It's all I've ever wanted but never did because I was too scared you'd hate me if I left. I know how you feel about field agents, especially spec ops."
"Hey," several of the agents protested, Spencer included.
"If this is because I want to move in with Jason?"
"You said it was just a place to stay," David growled.
"It's not that," Kaylee corrected quickly. "It's because you're finally taking that leap. If you can do it, so can I." They hugged.
Spencer swung his gaze to Dan and shrugged. Kaylee had more guts than the rest of her family combined. If she shot half as well as Logan, thought half as fast as Chris, and dug up intel anywhere near as quick as Charis, she'd make one hell of a spec ops agent.
Dan narrowed his eyes as he held Spencer's. "Anything you want to offer up?"
"I'm good."
"Are you?"
Goddamn it. He didn't want to announce it and make it sound like he was fishing for sympathy. But, it was out there now. With a deep sigh, he came out with it. "I'm going to be taking a little time off."
"Another kid on the way?" Wayde asked. All eyes jumped to Kathryn. She shook her head and nodded for him to go on. Little Emily, her wild curls like a red halo, stared at him with those giant blue eyes. She looked just like her mom. He had to be here to watch her grow up. He just had to. That thought alone gave him the strength to keep going.
"I, uh?" he cleared his throat when his voice cracked. Jesus, it shouldn't be this hard. He shouldn't be scared. But, damn it, he was. Not for him, but for his family being forced to face a possible future without him. "I have cancer. Stage three."
The collective gasp echoed through the room. He closed his eyes to gather enough resolve to not break down in front of them all. After several seconds, he glanced around and braced himself just as Charis ran over and threw her arms around his neck. He then looked to Dan, who'd paled and kept his head down, his expression guarded.
"Good thing you're in
TREX," Hunter said when the silence grew so loud it rang.
Spencer cocked his head. "Why's that?"
"You find anything. Even a cure for cancer."
"And if we don't?" He hated to ask, but since everyone else put their raw emotions out there, he held nothing back. Charis withdrew but still held Spencer's arm.
Hunter looked around the room. "Cancer is just one thing. There are more of you. The odds aren't looking good for cancer."
Everyone chuckled, including Spencer. It was the first time he'd felt like smiling since hearing the news that had changed his entire outlook. Before, he was all about the job, using it to protect the family. Now, family came first. It should have always been that way.
"What kind of cancer?" Seth asked.
"Rectal."
Several of the agents exchanged glances before Chris said what everyone else was thinking. "You've always been a pain in the ass."
The room erupted in laughter. It was dark. Morbid, even. Yet, it was how the agents coped with tragedy, both present and future. They cracked jokes and jibed each other. It was their way of saying what no one had the guts to say-they loved each other and would always be there for their family, blood or not.
Logan hugged Spencer before slapping him on the back. "Let me just throw this out there. What if I take Team Two? Temporarily, of course. Give you a chance for some downtime. I doubt either of the Neely brothers will want a lead position. Granger and Burns are too busy cracking jokes, and you're down a man anyway. Bring me in and let me take the team off your hands."
"I'm losing the Neelys to Team Three, so I'm actually down three. If I step back, you'd only have two. That's not enough for a team."
Logan shoulders slumped. "Guess not."
"Which is why you should head up one of the new teams," Dan offered. "We're putting together four new teams to have six in total ready for deployment. We've got Teams One through Four covered, so take your pick. Do you like Five or Six better?"
Logan grinned. "Six. That way I can use my thumb to signal my team. I'd rather keep my trigger finger free." Considering he was one of the best sharpshooters in all of TREX, Spencer understood why.
Charis finally released Spencer's arm and returned to her husband's side. They exchanged glances before she spoke. "David and I have news."
"More babies?" Helen McKoy, the matriarch of the McKoy clan, chimed in, a wide smile lighting up her features.
"God, no." David spoke up quickly, earning a glare from his wife. He shrank back. "I mean, not right now." It came out like a question.
"We're moving."
"What?" Chris stiffened and sat up straight, definitely not happy at the news of his twin moving away. "Where?"
"Closer to you."
"Closer?" Correction. Now he was definitely not happy. "You're shitting me."
She smiled warmly, either oblivious to her brother's shock or ignoring it. Charis didn't miss much, so Spencer leaned more toward her ignoring it. "It's the house right next door to yours. Bethany and I already have plans to fence the two backyards so the kids can play together."
Chris whipped his head around to his wife. "You knew about this?"
Bethany opened and closed her mouth several times before admitting, "It was my idea." When Chris took a breath to protest, she hurried out the rest of her explanation. "I need help. I thought I could do this, but I can't. I'm not afraid to admit that. When Charis told me they were looking to upgrade to a bigger house, I mentioned the one next door. It just sort of took off from there."
"You're okay with this?" he asked David.
"You're my brother. I'm more than okay with whatever it takes to help out. Charis works from home now and I'm gone on assignment half the time. We can set up quite the intel office for you."
"And I can come over whenever you need me. Even better, we can set up one big office." Charis clapped as she smiled wide. "We'll see each other every day!"
"Swell," Chris groaned and rolled his eyes.
"Twins," Hunter said, bouncing his gaze between Charis and Chris. "A boy and a girl. Her babies are twins." He nodded at Bethany's huge belly. "Twins?"
She shook her head and rubbed her rounded abdomen. "Just one."
"You sure?"
Hesitating, she then turned to Chris. "We're sure. Aren't we?"
"The doctor would have told us."
"Twins," Hunter repeated. "Lots of twins in this family. I like this family. It's big. There are too many people to all disappear."
"You're a member of this family, too." Dan shocked everyone with that statement. He'd never warmed up to anyone so fast. That included his wife.
JT stepped forward. "You found us, right? That makes you a junior TREX agent, you know."
"Can I be a real agent someday?" Hunter beamed. "I'm really good at finding stuff."
"You want to be a TREX agent when you grow up?" she asked.
He dropped his smile and immediately shook his head. "I don't want to grow up."
She brought her hands up like a traffic cop. "Then you don't have to."
His smile returned.
"How about you, Hunter?" Dan nudged the kid. "Do you have anything you want to share with the group? Something none of us know about you?"
He blushed hard and dropped his gaze.
Dan nudged him again. "You don't have to."
"Buster wants to," he muttered. The room fell silent. He kept his attention on the dog at his feet as he finally spoke. "We weren't home when Carmen died because we were?uh?" He shoved his hand deep into his front jeans pocket and pulled out a handful of wadded up cash. "We stole from the big church right by my house. We usually only take enough to buy food, but it was Christmas and I wanted to get my sister something nice." He dropped the money to the floor and looked to Dan. "Are you going to take me to jail?"
"No," Dan said and snapped his brow into a frown. "But you have to promise me you'll never steal again."
"I promise. Stealing is wrong. It doesn't matter why. I'm sorry."
"Does stealing hearts count?" Kathryn whispered in Spencer's ear after sneaking up behind him. His daughter reached for him. He took her and cuddled her close on one side, and pulled his wife close to him on the other.
"He's a pretty damn cute kid." Spencer gave her a sideways glance. "Should I be worried?"
"I'll let you know in a couple of years."
He kissed the top of her head. Every day he thanked his lucky stars for reuniting him with Kathryn and starting a family. If he'd learned anything from tonight's events, it was to live each moment like it was your last. His dad used to say a person could never look forward to the future if they couldn't see beyond the past. Jack Allen had been a very smart man.
"What are you going to sing?" she asked as she batted those beautiful baby blues. His daughter followed suit and batted hers, too. Talk about stealing hearts. He melted as he always did around them.
"Sing?"
"You always play the piano and sing on Christmas Eve."
"At home," he pointed out, but it was too late. Too many had heard Kathryn's comment.
"I didn't know you sang." Wayde nodded toward the door. "We have a piano downstairs."
In no time, the party moved to the large rec room on the first floor. Spencer sat at the piano and teased the keys as he warmed up. He loved to play. He wasn't that great of a singer, but it didn't matter. He was surrounded by his family. For them, he'd happily perform.
"I love Christmas music," Hunter said and sat on the bench with Spencer. For a kid with communication issues and trouble with social cues, he had no problem fitting right in with this motley crew. "Do you know the one about being together every Christmas? Can that be us?"
Spencer played the intro to Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas. Charis pulled her little sisters over to the piano. JT and Mia joined them. Even Bethany joined in as the women sang the first verse.
By the chorus, the men had joined in, some hitting the mark, but most completely off-key. They all laughed a
s they got the words wrong, laughed when they missed the notes, and never stopped smiling.
"And have yourself," Spencer sang above them all. "A Merry little TREXmas now."
THE END
Thank you for reading Merry TREXmas! Please consider leaving a review. It's one of the absolute BEST things you can do for an author.
Interested in more TREX? Please visit my website at?www.alliekadams.com.
About the Author
"If you're looking for non-stop, heart-racing action and sizzling romance, look no further. Allie K. Adams will take you there-and more!" -USA Today bestselling author Lucy Monroe
Allie K. Adams is the USA Today bestselling author of several award-winning stories. An active member of the search and rescue, as well as having previously served as a reserve deputy, Allie has firsthand experience in most of the dangers she writes about. Known for her highly thrilling, deeply intense suspense romances, she can be found most days in front of her computer, saving the world one sizzling story at a time. She grew up in Seattle and now currently lives in southwest Montana with the hubs and various other wildlife.
She loves to hear from readers and encourages them to reach out to her through her website at?www.alliekadams.com.
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Books by Allie K. Adams
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No Way Out (#4 TREX Brief - Special Edition)
Seek and Destroy (#5)
Under the Covers (#6)
Out of Time (#7)
It Takes Two (#8)
Merry TREXmas (#9 - Special Edition)
Girls On Film (#10)
THE BRACE SERIES - Police Romantic Suspense
Brace For Impact (#1)
Brace For Contact (#2) - Unabridged Version Coming Soon!
THE CAMPUS PLAYERS - Sassy New Adult
Grooming the Player (#1)
Hiring the Player (#2)
Playing the Player (#3) - Unabridged Version Coming Soon!
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A Love Once Lost (Barbara Freethy's The Callaways)
Taking Chances, Part 1 (HM Ward's The Arrangement)
Truth or Dare (Carly Phillips' Dare to Love)
Turn the Page (Tiffany A. Snow's Kathleen Turner)
Taking Chances, Part 2 (HM Ward's The Arrangement) - Coming Soon!
THE ROADHOUSE SERIES - Cowboy Romantic Suspense Serial
Riding Lessons - Masters' Roadhouse, Part 1 (#1)
Riding Double - Masters' Roadhouse, Part 2 (#2)
Riding Cowboys - Henry's Roadhouse, Part 1 (#3) - Coming Soon!
Riding the Fence - Henry's Roadhouse, Part 2 (#4) - Coming Soon!
Riding Bareback - Emerson's Roadhouse, Part 1 (#5) - Coming Soon!
The Last Ride - Emerson's Roadhouse, Part 2 (#6) - Coming Soon!
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