The good thing about Joey’s party was that I got to eat pizza and cake and ice cream, too. Also I got to watch Pockets put on his magic show. Guess what Pockets could do. He could break an egg into a hat, pour in some milk, tap the hat with his wand — and make a dove fly out. If I put an egg and milk into my hat, I would just make a mess. And some adult would probably be mad at me. Pockets could also pull scarves out of his mouth. And he cut a rope in half, and then the rope put itself back together again. Pockets was a true magician.
The bad thing about Joey’s birthday party was that I did not know the kids. When Joey’s father brought his cake to him, I sang, “Happy birthday, dear Joey,” with everyone else. But I felt funny, since I had not met Joey before. Then Mr. Rush handed me a big present and he said, “Go give Joey this gift, Karen. Tell him it is from the Pizza Queen.”
But it was not really from me, and Joey knew that.
I was glad when the party was over.
“Mommy, what time is it?” I asked on the way home.
“Almost five o’clock, sweetie,” she replied.
Five o’clock. Boo and bullfrogs. The weekend was almost over and I had not had time to play with Nancy or Hannie. I had not even called them. I played with Emily Junior that night instead. And Hootie. And Andrew. But I missed my friends. I was not sure I liked being so busy.
Before I went to sleep I kissed Hootie good night. “I hope you are enjoying your new home,” I said. Then I lay in bed and thought about going to school in the cafeteria the next day.
Karen the Pest
Bang, bang, bang. Clunk, clunk, clunk.
I peered into my classroom. It was full of workmen. They were standing on ladders and bending over toolboxes. One was lying on his back with his head under the radiator. They were hammering and banging and talking. Also they were drinking coffee. The room smelled of coffee and paint. I saw brushes and cans lined up.
“Hey, Karen! Did you forget?” called someone. Natalie Springer was hurrying through the hallway. “It’s Monday. We go to the cafeteria, remember? The workmen are in our room today.”
“I know. I just wanted to see what they are doing,” I replied.
Natalie and I walked to the cafeteria. Natalie gazed at my crown. “How long do you get to wear that?” she asked.
“For another week or so,” I told her.
“How about the sunglasses?”
“Forever. I think I will just keep wearing them. Except when I need to wear my other glasses. It is good practice for when I really am a great big movie star.”
Natalie and I walked into the cafeteria. Our classmates were running everywhere. Bobby was pretending to serve drinks from the soda machine. Pamela was giving Jannie and Leslie a ride on a food cart.
“Uh-oh,” I said. “We are going to get in tr — ”
“Ahem.”
I whirled around. Ms. Colman was standing behind Natalie and me. She did not look a bit happy.
In a flash, everyone was sitting at two of the long cafeteria tables.
We folded our hands in front of us.
That morning Ms. Colman gave us a big talk about our behavior. Then we got to work. We worked on reading and spelling and math. Guess what. There was no blackboard in the cafeteria, so we could sit wherever we wanted. I sat between Hannie and Nancy.
After a few hours, the first-graders came into the cafeteria. It was their lunchtime. So we had to leave. We worked in one of their classrooms for awhile. Then it was our lunchtime, and then recess. After recess we moved into the auditorium.
Ms. Colman told us to open our science books. She talked to us about the sun and the planets. But we were having trouble paying attention. Ricky was busy prying old gum off the bottom of his seat. The twins were trying to peek behind the curtains at the windows. Addie kept moving her wheelchair up and down the aisle.
Finally Ms. Colman sighed. “All right,” she said. “I think you need a break.”
“Yes!” I cried. I leaped to my feet. So did everyone else. Bobby, Ricky, and Hank began a game of Kleenex tag. Hannie and Nancy and I raced up the steps to the stage.
“Let’s put on a show!” exclaimed Nancy.
“Okay!” I cried. “I know what to do.” I settled my crown on my head. “I will now perform my television commercial,” I announced.
I performed it five times. I would have kept on going, but Pamela said, “Tsk. You are a pest, Karen.” Everyone nodded their heads. Even Nancy and Hannie. Even Natalie.
And Bobby stopped his game of Kleenex tag to say, “You know, the contest is on at Pizza Express to choose the next king or queen.”
I closed my eyes. I did not want to think about that.
Lonely
On Tuesday my friends and I went to the cafeteria again. But this time, when the first-graders came in, Ms. Colman did not move us to their classroom. Instead she said, “Boys and girls, the weather is beautiful today. So we will try working outside until lunchtime.”
Oh, boy. I just love working outside. When Ms. Colman takes us to the playground, we always sit under the same tree. Sometimes she reads to us, sometimes we write stories or poems, sometimes we work in our workbooks. On that Tuesday, Ms. Colman read to us from a very funny book called The Mouse and the Motorcycle, by Beverly Cleary. But after a while she noticed that Nancy was looking for four-leaf clovers, and I was braiding Hannie’s hair, and Ricky was rubbing two sticks together trying to start a campfire. Then a kindergarden class ran outside for recess and we all turned to watch them.
“Okay,” said Ms. Colman, “I think you need another break.” She closed the book. “Fifteen minutes,” she added.
Nancy and Hannie and I headed for a hopscotch court, but I heard a small voice say, “ ’Scuze me. Are you the Pizza Queen?”
A bunch of kindergarteners were following my friends and me.
“Yes, I am,” I replied.
“I like your crown,” said one.
“Do you remember me?” asked another. “I was at Joey McGrath’s birthday party. And so were you, Pizza Queen.”
“I was there, too,” said another little kid.
“Pizza Queen, could I have your autograph?”
“Could I try on your crown?”
“Sure, sure,” I replied. I wrote my name on a couple of pieces of paper from my notebook. Then I let two of the kids try on my crown. (I watched them very carefully.)
“Thanks! Thank you!” cried the kids.
“Would you like me to perform my TV commercial?” I asked.
Of course they wanted me to. I put it on four times. Then I turned around to see if Nancy and Hannie and my other friends were watching. But they were not. They were playing hopscotch and catch and jump rope and kickball. Do you know what? I felt an intsy bit lonely.
Oops
Since I had felt lonely that day in school, I played with Nancy all afternoon. We pretended we were Lovely Ladies having a tea party. Then Mrs. Dawes let us take Nancy’s baby brother for a walk. After that we ran around my yard for a while. By dinnertime I felt much better, not lonely at all. I ate a big supper.
Then I went to my room. This is the homework Ms. Colman had given us at the end of the day: Think about ways you can help the environment. I sat on my bed. Hmm. What kinds of things could kids do? What could I do?
While I thought, I gazed around my room. I looked at my desk. I looked at Emily in her cage. I looked at Hootie’s cage. I saw the cage, but not Hootie. I jumped up. I ran to the cage.
Where was Hootie?
“Hootie? Are you there?” I cried. “Where are you hiding?” The top of Hootie’s cage was half off. It looked as if it had been moved to the side. How had that happened? Had Hootie figured out how to escape? (He might have. He is a very smart guinea pig.) Had Rocky gone after Hootie? (He might have. He is a cat.)
“Hootie! Hootie!” I called. I rummaged around in his cage. Maybe Hootie was hiding in the shavings.
But Hootie was gone.
“Oh, Emily,” I said to my ra
t. “I wish you could talk. Then you could tell me what happened to Hootie.”
Emily just peered at me from her nest of newspapers and shavings. I ran to my door. I was about to yell for Mommy. Then I remembered something. I remembered the promises I had made when I had asked if I could take care of Hootie. I had promised Mommy that Hootie would be no trouble. I had promised to be responsible. Well, now there was big trouble. And I certainly did not seem very responsible.
I could not tell anybody that Hootie was missing. I would have to solve this problem all by myself.
I decided to search my room. (I closed my door so no one would see what I was doing.) “Hootie! Hootie!” I called softly. “Hootie, come out. Please come back home. I miss you.”
I looked under my bed and under my desk and under my chair and under everything. I got a flashlight and shined it behind the bureau. Then I shined it around inside my closet. I looked in every shoe, and under all the junk. I even looked on the shelf above my clothes.
No Hootie.
I carried the flashlight into the hall. I looked up and down the hall. I looked in Andrew’s bedroom and in Seth and Mommy’s bedroom. I looked in the bathrooms.
No Hootie.
At bedtime, Hootie was still missing. I made an announcement.
“Mommy, Seth, Andrew,” I said, “I am very sorry, but I think Rocky has been going after Hootie.” (That was not a lie.) “So I have decided to keep the door to my room closed. That way, Hootie will be safe.” (That was sort of a lie.) “Please do not go in my room.”
If nobody went in my room, nobody would notice that Hootie was not in his cage. To help my family remember to stay out, I made a sign. It said, Privit. Do Not Enter. I hung it on my door.
Finally I went to bed. But I did not sleep very well. I kept waking up and calling softly, “Hootie! Hootie!” But in the morning, Hootie was still missing.
Worries
It was Wednesday. I had woken up early because I had not slept well. Even though I knew it was a silly thing to do, I checked Hootie’s cage. I did not think he would be in it, but I checked anyway. Then, while the rest of my little-house family slept, I looked around my room again. I looked under things, behind things, and in the closet.
No Hootie.
By the time Seth drove me to school that day I was keeping a terrible secret: Hootie was still missing. I did not think anyone in my family would find out, though. The door to my room was closed, and my sign was hanging up. And I did not plan to tell anyone about Hootie.
That morning I tried to concentrate. I tried to pay attention to Ms. Colman. This was not easy. I was worried about Hootie. Plus, we were working in the cafeteria again. I could smell chicken roasting. I watched a deliveryman bring in a load of ice-cream bars. I listened to the cooks talking.
And then into the cafeteria walked Mr. Rush, a photographer, and a woman holding a pad of paper. Mr. Rush waved to me. Then he talked to Ms. Colman for a few minutes.
“Class,” said Ms. Colman when they were finished talking, “I would like you to meet Mr. Rush. He is the owner of Pizza Express. He phoned me yesterday and said he might drop by school this morning. He has brought along some people from the newspaper. They are working on an article about the Pizza Express contest. They would like to take some pictures of Karen during her last days as the Pizza Queen.”
I sat up straight in my seat. I smiled. I adjusted my crown. “Where do you want me to pose?” I asked Mr. Rush.
“Oh, just stay where you are,” he replied. “We want pictures of you and your friends working at school, just like on any day.”
“You want pictures of us?” siad Bobby.
“Really?” squeaked Natalie.
“How does my hair look?” whispered Pamela.
The photographer walked around the room. He snapped pictures everywhere. I was not even in some of them. The woman walked around the room, too. She asked us questions and wrote down what we said. She asked me if I had enjoyed my reign as Pizza Queen. She asked my friends how they had felt about going to school with the Pizza Queen.
“It was wonderful,” said Natalie. “I like knowing a famous person.”
But Pamela said, “Karen is a pain in the neck.”
And Bobby said, “The Pizza Queen does not keep her promises.”
I stuck my tongue out at Pamela and Bobby.
Then the photographer said, “How about a group shot? Everybody together. Ms. Colman, too. Over here at this table.”
The photographer took five pictures. Then my friends began talking and laughing. Audrey chased Hank around a table. Addie gave Tammy a ride on the back of her wheelchair. And …guess what. Bobby Gianelli walked right over to Mr. Rush and said, “When are we going to get the free pizza?”
“Excuse me?” said Mr. Rush.
“Karen said she would get free pizza for us, because she is the Pizza Queen. Only she has not done it.”
“And soon she will not be the Pizza Queen anymore,” added Hank.
A bunch of kids had crowded around Mr. Rush. They were all asking for their free pizza. Mr. Rush looked confused. I heard him say, “We’ll see, we’ll see.” Then Ms. Colman rescued him.
I was so embarrassed. I wished I could just crawl somewhere and hide. Soon everyone would know I had lied about the pizza. And soon everyone would know I had lost Hootie.
I was in a gigundo mess.
Hide-and-Seek
I could not wait to go home after school. I did not want to hear any more questions about pizza. I did not want to hear about being a pain in the neck or about not keeping my promises.
I did want to look for Hootie, though.
I ran up the stairs and down the hall to my room. I opened the door. I closed it behind me. Then I peered into Hootie’s cage. Of course, he was not in it. How could he have gotten into my room when the door was closed? And even if he had returned, would he have jumped back into his cage by himself? Probably not.
I decided to search the house again. I would search one room at a time. And I would look in every place I could think of.
I looked in Andrew’s room first. Maybe Andrew had wanted to play with Hootie so he had taken Hootie from the cage and hidden him in his room. But I did not find Hootie there, even though I looked very hard. I did find one of my sneakers, though. I tossed it into my room.
Next I searched the bathrooms. That did not take too long. After that I searched Mommy and Seth’s room. Then I went downstairs.
I was on my hands and knees peering behind a couch when I heard Mommy say, “Karen? What are you doing?”
Uh-oh. I could not tell Mommy what I was really doing.
“I — I am, um, playing hide-and-seek with Rocky,” I said. I stood up. “Oh, Rocky!” I called. “Where are you? You have found a very good hiding place this time.” I ran into the playroom.
Andrew was there. “Are you really playing hide-and-seek with Rocky?” he wanted to know. “Can I play, too?”
“Well — ” I started to say. And just then Rocky wandered into the room.
“Hey! There’s Rocky!” cried Andrew. “He is not hiding at all.”
“I guess he got tired of playing,” I said. “Oh well.”
I went back to searching for Hootie. While I was looking for him I found my missing troll, a quarter, a poem I had written, and the other sneaker. But I did not find Hootie.
I sat down on the floor in the dining room. What if I did not find Hootie in the next five days? Also, what would my friends do when they learned the truth about the pizza? They would think I was a lot worse than just a pain in the neck.
I gulped. I was about to burst into tears when the phone rang.
Good News
“Karen!” called Mommy. “Phone for you. It’s Mr. Rush.”
Mr. Rush? Oops. I was sure he wanted to know why my friends had been bugging him about free pizza. Or maybe he was calling to tell me it was time to turn in my crown.
I took the phone from Mommy. “Hello?” I said.
“Hi, Karen. It’s Mr. Rush from Pizza Express. I enjoyed meeting your classmates this morning. They are very …energetic.”
“I — I know. Um, Mr. Rush, about the free pizza,” I began. (From across the kitchen Mommy sent me a FROWN.)
“That is just why I am calling, Karen,” said Mr. Rush. “I heard your friends asking about the free pizza, and I was wondering something. I was wondering if you would like to invite your class to a party at Pizza Express. I will serve free pizza and sodas to everyone. It will be my way of saying thank you for doing such a wonderful job as the Pizza Queen. We could have the party after school on Friday. How does that sound?”
“Oh! Oh, Mr. Rush, it sounds great! Thank you so much! I will have to talk to my friends, but I am sure they will think it is great, too. Here comes my mom. She wants to talk to you now.”
* * *
Even though I had not found Hootie, I began to feel better. I looked cheerfully for Hootie until dinnertime. After supper I did my homework. Then I looked for Hootie again. The next morning I put on my crown and my sunglasses. When I reached the cafeteria I said to my classmates, “Guess what. Wonderful news. You know the free pizza I promised you?”
Everyone crowded around me. “Yes?” they said.
“Well, I can give you something better than just pizza. I can give you an actual pizza party. It will be at Pizza Express tomorrow after school. You will get pizza and soda. And all because I am the Pizza Queen. I told you I could get you pizza, and now I got you a whole party.”
All day long, whenever I could, I reminded my friends about the wonderful pizza party I would be giving them the next day.
But guess what. When I was in the bathroom I heard Pamela say to Audrey, “Karen thinks she is so great. She brags all the time.”
“Yeah, just because she is the stupid Pizza Queen,” said Audrey.