“You look like a goddess.” I graze my teeth over her ear. “One I’m gearing up to properly worship.” I rub my blooming hardness over her thigh. “But first I have a gift for you.”
“Hmm.” She gives a playful laugh. “I wonder what that could be? Let me guess. You’re going to feed me breakfast.” Her knee grazes my balls ever so gently.
“You’re crude, you know that?” A dull laugh dies in my chest as I lean over to the nightstand and pull out a small velvet box with a disheveled bow and hand it to her.
“What’s this?” She hikes up on her elbows, eyeing the curiosity as if it were a scorpion. “My God, do you give all of your one-night stands a parting gift? You’re a real prince, you know that?”
“I might be a prince, but to answer your question, no. That’s just a little something I’ve hauled around with me from move to move for the last six years. We broke up before Christmas.” I take a deep breath at the thought. “Remember? Anyway, that was your Christmas gift. It’s a little overdue.”
“Oh?” She sits up in bed until I’m eye level with the girls. Lex has never been shy about her body, and dear Lord, she doesn’t have a reason to be. “If this is an engagement ring, I’m going to say no.” She bites down over a smile while stealing a moment to glance at me.
“It’s not an engagement ring.” I frown up at her playfully. “But now that I see how much pleasure the prospect of turning me down brings you, the next gift just might be.”
My phone buzzes over the nightstand, but I choose to ignore it. Whoever it is will have to wait until later, until tomorrow if I’m lucky. I’ll do every acrobatic stunt in the book to keep Lex locked in my bedroom.
She plucks at the old worn bow and peels the box back, exposing a frail gold necklace with a pendant attached with three shiny Xs attached in a row. “Oh my goodness! Triple X!” She gasps, pulling it to her chest with delight. Triple X was what I called her in private. But Lex did her part too and lived up to the moniker. “I love it!” Her feet kick at the sheets in an airborne version of the happy dance. “Help me get it on.” She hands me the box, and I carefully free the necklace from it and clasp it around her neck.
Lex holds the tiny pendant out, examining it from a new vantage point.
I brush a kiss over her hip before sitting up next to her. “I always knew it was all you would ever have to wear. It’s perfect on you.”
A laugh bubbles from her as she opens her arms and pulls me down on top of her. Lex is smiling right down to her toes, her golden eyes, each with a laugh of their own.
“Lex,” I whisper right over her lips. I can feel the words bubbling up inside me, begging to jet on out. “I love you. I still love you.” I dot her lips with a kiss. “I never did stop.”
A gasp gets locked in her throat, and she flattens her palms over my chest. Just as she’s about to either slap or deck me—probably both, the hard thump of a fist pounds over the front door.
“What in the hell.” I land a kiss at her temple before jumping into my pants and heading for the door. “Wait here.”
The pounding intensifies, and the doorbell goes off in spasms. The doorman would never let a madman through those gates, but then again, my phone did ring. Worst-case scenario—a madman made it past him, and he tried to warn me.
I peer through the peephole and spot an officer dressed in uniform, the magnification of the tiny hole barrels his chest out a little too much. He leans in, and the stubble on his face comes at me so fast I back up.
Lex ambles into the room and speeds next to me, desperately trying to button the dress shirt I wore last night. It’s a good look on her, and I can’t help but give a lopsided grin at the sight. “Who is it?” she hisses. Her nose does this cute little twitch that opens the floodgates to a thousand different memories, and all I want to do is carry her back to that bedroom.
“It’s a cop. I’d better see what he wants.” Just as my hand goes for the lock, the door thumps to life again.
“You in there, Lex?” a deep voice thunders from the other side. “Don’t make me beat this door down.”
Shit. My adrenaline skyrockets. “You know this guy? Is this some amped up ex of yours?”
“No.” She taps her hands in the air as if motioning for me to keep it down. “It’s my amped up big brother.” She hides her face in her hands a moment. “I forgot all about meeting him for coffee this morning.”
“Big brother—Marlin?” Crap. It’s been years since we last had the misfortune to meet, but something tells me it wasn’t long enough.
More pounding ensues, this time with the threat of taking me downtown.
“I guess I should let him in.” I unhook the lock, and Lex presses her body against the door. Her lips quiver as she looks up at me with fright.
“Have you lost your freaking mind? He’s going to kill us. You first, then me!”
The door pulsates with each thunderous bang. “Lex? I can hear you for shit’s sake. Open the damn door before I beat it down!”
I’m not sure what happened next. Either I twisted the knob or Lex hit it just right with her hip or Marlin just got lucky because the door cracks open and his foot is suddenly wedged inside.
“Oh my God!” Lex jumps away from the door as if it morphed into a snake. And just like that, Marlin spills into the room clad in blue. The shiny silver badge on his chest proves that he’s the real deal. Jepson PD. Who would have thought that after all these years he and I were just a hair away from meeting up again? And, unfortunately, it wasn’t some run-of-the-mill speeding ticket that reconnected our paths. It’s the fact Lex overslept in my bed.
Marlin is basically Lex in male skin, far more aggressive, both arms riddled with tats, his biceps bulging as if silently promising me a broken nose, leg, and arm before he takes off.
His eyes ride up and down his sister in disappointment. “Go get some clothes on,” he growls as he refocuses his attention back on me. “I’m probably going to kill you,” he says it flat like a fact. “Don’t worry. I’ll make it look like an accident. No reason to embarrass either Lex or me in the situation.” A menacing smile flinches on his lips. “The only decision I need to make is whether or not I want to make it quick and painless or slow and agonizing as hell. I vote for the latter.”
He lunges at me, and I pull him in by the shirt, launching him across the room.
“Marlin—mind your weapon!” Lex shrills so loud the veins in her neck jump like livewires.
“You’re right.” He takes off his belt, dumping it along with his gun onto the coffee table before pouncing on me like a wild tiger.
This isn’t your standard Jepson PD procedure. This is fist in your face, knee up your ass personal.
He bashes my head into the wood floor like bouncing a ball. “You piece of shit!” He offers up a couple of kidney punches, and Lex screams and threatens to break a vase over his head. And instead of fighting back, I try to figure out where the hell Lex will get a vase because I’m one hundred percent certain I don’t own one. But in the truth, I don’t want to be the bad guy here. I just crawled back into Lex’s life. There’s no way in hell I’m letting Marlin boot me out. And if I fracture his skull like I’m leaning toward, it might just do that.
He lands hard over my back, his heavy breathing clotting up my ear. “I’m going to make sure you never screw another living thing again.”
I can feel his knee retract.
“That’s it.” I twist out of range and land my fist over his jaw, connecting time after time as if he were a punching bag. My foot digs into his gut, and I kick him across the floor until he butts against the sofa with an ugh expelling from him.
I’m slow to look up and meet with Lex’s beautiful eyes, half-afraid it’ll be the last time I see them.
Her fists are balled into her hips, and she’s shaking her head at me.
“It’s about time you grew a pair.” She reaches down and offers me a hand as I get up on my feet. “For a second there, I thought you were enjoying it
.”
“I didn’t want to hurt your brother.” I pull her in and bury my face in her neck a moment, still struggling to catch my breath.
Marlin crawls to his feet, using the couch for support. “You didn’t hurt me.” He looks to Lex, and a thick moment of silence bounces between them. “But he will hurt you. I can’t believe you’re going back for seconds. Wasn’t once enough?” He’s speaking tenderly, the way you would a distraught soul about to take a fatal plunge. “Don’t do it, Lex. You deserve better than this. You’re special, and he has a habit of forgetting that.”
My stomach clenches. With everything in me, I know that’s not true, but I don’t want to fall into Marlin’s bear trap and have to chew my way out with a bunch of truths I’m not sure Lex is ready to believe. That’s a conversation we need to have in private. For sure not with her brother in the peanut gallery ready to refute any and everything I have to say. Nope. Not going there.
Her arm tightens around my waist. “This isn’t anything,” she barks it out so convincingly my stomach is right back to tensing up in a knot for far more nefarious reasons. “We’re not serious.” Her hand floats to that triple X necklace I just gifted her, and she fingers it as if it were a life raft. “I’m in control, Marlin. And what the heck is this, I’ll huff and puff and blow your doors down routine? I’m not amused. Yes, I missed meeting you for coffee. Yes, you probably sent a million text messages I didn’t see, but does that really justify what went on here? How the heck did you find me, anyway?”
His eyes enlarge with rage. “That roommate of yours made it real easy. And since when did you get a roommate, anyway? How many more things about your life don’t I know about, Lex? Anything else you’d like to spring on me while dressed in last night’s clothes? Hell, it’s not even your shirt.”
Her mouth opens and closes, and she clenches her knees together as if just remembering her scantily clad state.
“We’ll do lunch this week. I promise.” She scuttles up and presses a quick kiss to his cheek, but he turns his head slightly as if repulsed from any physical contact with her in this less than chaste state.
“Make it dinner. I’m on days all week. And yes, I know you work nights at that—that ridiculous bar this twerp owns.” He darts an accusing finger at me. Twerp? He’s lucky I don’t shove him out the window and call him a twerp all the way down. “That new roommate of yours sang like a canary.” He heads for his belt and straps his weaponry back into place. “And why the hell didn’t you tell me you had some nut job orchestrating a PETA protest in front of your home?”
Lex groans. “Son of a motherless goat, why did Stumpy have to drag PETA into this?” She rolls her head back and moans as she walks Marlin to the door. “Don’t call me. I’ll call you.”
“Too bad, I’m calling,” he snaps as he crests the threshold. “We need to talk about Serena. Or have you forgotten that family comes first?”
Her spine straightens as she stiffens. Ever since Lex’s mother ran out on them, she’s taken on the role of primary caretaker. Her father passed a while back, and she’s been mothering not only her sister and Marlin—even though he’s too much of a douche to admit it, but she had taken her cousins, Rush and Sunday, under her wing. Nolan, their brother, is about my age. I’ve known him for a while. Good guy. But in the last six years, I’m sure Rush and Sunday have grown up. I figure they’re in college themselves about now. This is the first time in Lex’s life that she gets to focus on herself—and hopefully, she’ll make a little room for me in the equation.
“Family comes first,” she repeats as she starts to shut the door.
“Hey, Collins!” Marlin shouts as she proceeds to entomb us inside. “I know where you live now. You better watch your back.”
“Nice,” I say, twisting the lock as soon as Lex seals the door shut. “Which one of us ordered a beating for brunch?” I tease, peppering her neck with kisses.
Lex pulls me back, tears glittering in her eyes, and my gut coils right back into that knot again.
“Hey”—my arms steady her by the shoulders—“I’m sorry I hurt your brother. I had no intention of doing so. Things just got out of hand. In no way did I—”
“Stop.” Her finger bounces over my lips, and I pull her in close again. “Marlin is right. What am I doing here?” She holds out her hands, confused as if she just materialized into the room. “I’m not the girl who sleeps with guys on a whim. I should never have had a drop of wine last night. I’m so stupid to think we could do what we did and there not be any repercussions. It’s going to be awkward now.” She drops her face in her hands and takes a hard sniff before coming back up for air. “I’ll try to get another waitressing position somewhere else.”
“No.” A rife panic sets in, and suddenly it’s as if my feet were to the flames. I’ve had Lex in my life for less than five minutes, and already she’s anxious to slip away. I can’t lose her twice. I couldn’t bear the torment. I almost didn’t survive the first time. I sure as hell won’t the second. “I’ll go somewhere else. You keep your job at The Sloppy Pelican.” I wince because I just so happened to rig it that I can’t be anywhere else. “Or you can simply go back to giving me the cold shoulder. But what I’m really hoping for is that we can have a sit-down. It doesn’t have to be now. I just—I need—”
“Closure.” She gives a curt nod as if demanding that I agree with her.
“No, I don’t need or want anything to do with that word. I need you. I need you back, Lex. I need things the way they were between us.” I’m pleading like a pussy, and I don’t really give a shit. “I need you, Lex. We’re good together. We fit. I get you, and you get me. The reason neither of us had a relationship in the last six years is because there’s nobody else out there for us. It’s you and me, ride or die. And I don’t want to ride or die without you.” My hand glides over her hair, and I memorize the soft silk of her waves, too afraid she’ll keep them away from me forever.
Lex steps back, peeling my limbs off her one by one. Her features turn to stone, that lively affect of hers all but a memory. “We’re not together.” She looks right past me as she says it. “This was a fluke, and it won’t happen again. There will be no personal conversations, no dates, no rolling around the sheets, and for God’s sake, no relationship.” She says that last part as if she were incredulous at the thought.
“Funny, you weren’t so repulsed by me last night.” Our eyes lock in a standoff. The gloves are off, and I’m ready to go twelve rounds. Hell, I want to. “You love me, Lex. You’re too afraid of losing control to give us another try. Let me in, Lex. Give us another chance.”
“You’re the one who loses control!” She drills her finger over my chest. “That’s your role in this disaster, remember?”
I close my eyes because it’s too hard to fight her on it. “Lex, as much as I don’t want to drag the past into this”—rage rockets through me, and I thunder at the top of my lungs—“that’s not what happened!”
She takes a quick breath. Her face grows pale, and for a second I want nothing more than to rewind the last ten seconds.
Lex takes a step in, her eyes seething with a newfound hatred for me. “Don’t you ever raise your voice to me again.”
“I raised my voice because I’m flat out frustrated that I can’t make you see the truth.”
Her shoulders sag, her entire person wilts into me a moment. For a brief second, gone is the ice queen that erects herself like some automatic response to rejection, pain, and hurt.
“I know,” she whispers. Her hand rises to my face, and for a moment I’m convinced she’s going to slap me, but instead, she pats my lips as if she were blind and needed to feel them in an effort to get to know them better. But my heart shatters to dust because deep down I know it’s her way of saying goodbye to them. “I’m so very sorry about Emilia. Be sure to tell Teagan I’ll help plan her party.” A lonely tear rolls down her face, and it knifes me to see it. “Don’t you ever speak to me again.”
She sn
atches her purse off the sofa and bolts out the door. No shoes, no pants, no underwear—I’m pretty certain. Nope. Lex Maxfield cannot get away from me fast enough.
Lex doesn’t want me to speak to her ever again.
It’s going to be a long, lonely, awful, hellish life without her.
And in no way will I ever accept it.
Belle of the Bar
Lex
Six Years Earlier…
It’s been one year. A little over one year to be exact. We actually celebrated our one year anniversary like a bunch of sappy hippies last Halloween. We were so ecstatic you would have thought someone inflated us with helium the way we were floating around Hollow Brook like a couple of mismatched balloons—dancing, exchanging I love yous as if every day were Valentine’s Day. We were kissing—outright diving our tongues down one another’s throats in public as if we were trying to give all of society the middle finger. We didn’t care who watched The Ax and Lex Show. We were on all the time, twenty-four seven and didn’t give a flying rip who tuned in or tuned out. I had finally done the impossible. I relinquished—gave my heart away, lost control. Two things I vowed I would never do again after my mother took off in that rumbling station wagon that roared up to our driveway. My mother, the flake, took off with some high school sweetheart so the two of them could shoot up coke for the rest of their days. She chose a mountain of white powder and cheap motel sex over my siblings and me. If she wasn’t going to step up and be the woman God intended her to be, I sure as heck was. In fact, I was fast becoming an expert. I took Aunt Priscilla’s younger two under my wing after she died in that horrible car wreck. Rush and Sunday need me. Nolan is grown, but he needs a mother figure to act as the familial glue even if he’s too stubborn to admit it. This is precisely why falling in love with Axel Collins or anyone else was a risk I never should have taken. Someone needs to have their head about them. And for God’s sake, nobody is ever allowed to run out on me again.