“While I’m glad you’re taking a nap, you were crying out. Is everything all right?”
She’d had a raging headache and had decided to work in their apartment for a while. When had she fallen asleep. “Of course. I’m fine. I have bad dreams sometimes. You know that.” She tried to keep his gaze, but it cost her.
His pupils narrowed. “What aren’t you telling me?”
She might have been avoiding him by working in the apartment. Sometimes she forgot how smart he was and how well he already knew her. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He didn’t speak. Those bourbon colored eyes narrowed, and the muscles in his chest flexed.
How could a look be so intimidating? For goodness’ sake. Her gaze shifted and landed on her father’s journal, near the counter. Her father had been a brilliant scientist, and he’d often recorded his thoughts. She hadn’t read it for a while. “Maybe I’ll read a bit.”
Jax bent and lifted her, striding toward the bed to pin her beneath him on the mattress. “Blue? In this new, postapocalyptic world, the rules have changed. You get that, right?”
Tingles rushed through her. His hard body bracketed her in warmth, and her breath caught. “Yes.” Her gaze dropped to his lips.
“You’re lying to me, and I don’t like it.” He settled between her legs, pressing just enough to catch her interest.
Her body pulsed. “I’m not lying.” She just wasn’t giving him the entire truth. Oh, she’d tell him about the letter she’d seen Vinnie grab, but not until Vinnie had a chance to speak with Raze. Lynne didn’t know what was going on, but the couple deserved a small window of time to do the right thing, and she wanted her new friendship with Vinnie to last. Jax would kick their door down to get the letter. “Don’t accuse me of being untruthful.”
He grasped her arms and lifted them above her head, flattening them under his.
She couldn’t move.
Her body trembled, and her nipples peaked.
“Tell me all of it.” His order came with warmth and warning.
“No.” She widened her legs and rubbed against him. Sparks rolled through her, caressing each nerve.
His head tilted just enough to be threatening. “Last time you defied me, you got spanked with a belt.”
She lifted an eyebrow. “I’ve learned to fight since then.”
“No, you haven’t,” he whispered, brushing his mouth across hers. “What are you hiding?”
“I’ll tell you later tonight.” She nipped his bottom lip. “Give me a few hours. You have to trust me, Mercury.”
He breathed out and studied her. “I do trust you. More than anybody else in life.”
She smiled. “Then believe me.”
“All right.” He leaned down and kissed her, going deep.
The sense of coming home careened through her, along with liquid desire. When he lifted his head, she waited until he focused on her gaze. “I love you, Jax. Everything you are and have done and will be.”
He closed his eyes and dropped his head to her neck to place a kiss at her jugular. “You’re my heart, Blue.”
“Good. You have got to stop threatening me with the belt.” She wrapped her fingers through his, even though she couldn’t move her hands off the bed.
He levered himself back. “You’re right, and I won’t do it again. Though if I remember right, you do like being tied with it.”
Well, now, that had been an adventure. She forced a frown. “Hmmm. I don’t recall that.”
His lip quirked. “Maybe I’ll have to remind you.”
God, she hoped he would. At the very least, she’d bought Vinnie a few hours to talk some sense into Raze Shadow. After dinner, Lynne would have to level with Jax about the letter. For now, she was going to enjoy her late afternoon. While she’d never solve the puzzle of how she’d found love in such dire circumstances, she’d learned to accept the good in her new life.
Whether he liked it or not, whether he understood it or not, Jax was good.
After a cold dinner of canned ravioli, Vinnie went up to the apartment and straightened the place. The area smelled like Raze, all male with the hint of forest. He was supposed to return by suppertime, but sometimes the scouting trips took a while. Finally, she lay down on the big bed, just for a moment, and closed her eyes.
She drifted along until fine whiskey heated through her veins. Her body hummed, and her mouth tingled. She opened her eyes, caught a flash of blue, and then gasped as Raze’s mouth enveloped hers.
Passion uncoiled inside her, taking over, making her pulse. She struggled to focus, but his tongue swept inside her mouth, and then all she could do was enjoy the moment. He kissed her deep, taking his time, propelling her into desire.
Something, a thought, tickled in the back of her brain, but sleep turned to need so quickly, she banished doubt.
His nimble fingers unbuttoned her shirt right before he swept off her pants.
She moved against his bare skin and hard erection. Her body ached, more than ready for him. Her heart thumped, and emotion filled her heart with Raze Shadow.
Almost frantic, she explored him. All hard ridges, smooth muscle, and raw strength. He rolled her over, and she had one second to appreciate the fact that he wore a condom before he shoved hard inside her.
She arched and sighed, accepting him, finally feeling appeased. Then he started to move. Her need shot right back up, sharper than before. “Raze,” she murmured, sliding her hands through his thick hair.
He pounded inside her, no preliminaries, giving as much as he took. His blue eyes tracked her, focused and glittering.
The orgasm attacked her from nowhere, flaring the room white-hot and forcing her eyelids closed. She gripped him hard, holding tight. With a final shove, his body jerked inside hers.
What the heck? A smile tickled her mouth. They came down at the same time, both panting.
He leaned back, still inside her. “Did you have a nice nap?” he asked, his voice gravelly.
She laughed. A full-on, relaxed, satisfied laugh. “Waking up was better.”
“Good.” He smoothed the hair back from her face, his large hand gentle.
Reality crept back in. She breathed out and sobered. “Um.”
“Um what, sweetheart?” he whispered, dropping a kiss on her nose.
Sweetheart. She liked that. A lot. “I found your letter, and I know about your sister.”
The energy in the room changed faster than a lightning strike.
Raze pulled out of her so quickly, Vinnie’s eyelids slid open. He rolled off the bed and stalked into the bathroom, no doubt disposing of the condom. Too bad the bathroom wasn’t functional.
Seconds later, he returned, seemingly unconcerned by his nudity.
His face had lost the slumbering pleasure she’d glimpsed on it moments ago, leaving hard and pissed in its place.
“Ah, shoot.” She tugged the sheet up and then sat, covering her still-humming body. A chill shook her. “I didn’t mean to blurt that out.”
“Where’s the letter?” he asked evenly, his eyes glowing with a light she couldn’t quite read.
She pointed to her jeans. “Back pocket.”
He grasped her jeans and tore out the letter. “You read this.”
“Yep. It’s very sweet.”
“Sweet?” His face darkened even further. “What the fuck, Vinnie? Seriously. What the fuck?”
Man, he could go from satiated to furious very quickly. That was quite a temper. “What?” She pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them.
“Are you crazy?”
“Maybe.” But she’d gone into this one with her eyes wide open.
He dug a fist into his eye. “You slept with me. Why the fuck did you sleep with me? Did you think sex would keep me from turning you over to Grey?”
Hurt ticked in her chest. “You’re the one who woke me up with the kissy face.”
He glowered. “Are you trying to manipulate me?”
&nbs
p; “Of course not. Geez, Raze. If I wanted safety, I would’ve gone to Jax with the letter immediately. Sleeping with you doesn’t guarantee my safety.”
Oops. She would’ve thought it was impossible, but his fury darkened even more. “It doesn’t?” He sounded like he’d bitten, chewed, and swallowed shards of glass. In fact, he sounded like the glass was still in his throat. “Really.”
She swallowed. “Um, listen. I—”
“Stop talking. For the love of God, stop talking before I beat you.” His hand shook as he reached for his jeans.
She snorted.
He stilled.
She smashed her lips together, but a small laugh escaped. Then another. Then she started laughing so hard, tears filled her eyes.
He watched her, his expression an intriguing mix of rage and incredulousness.
Finally, she hiccupped twice. “Sorry about that.” She cleared her throat. “There’s no way you’d beat me.” The man had apparently forgotten she was a profiler. Perhaps the most experienced one still living.
He cocked his head to the side in a curiously dangerous move. “Maybe you didn’t profile me as well as you thought.”
Well, he did have the hint of a wild card to him. “You’re angry because I know your real agenda?”
“Damn it. I’m pissed as hell.”
“Why?” It wasn’t like she’d snooped through his stuff. She’d gone back to her former apartment.
He gripped her arms and lifted her onto her knees. “You found a letter saying I planned to turn you over to the Mercs.” At her nod, he hissed in his breath. “Instead of running to Jax and telling all, you come up here and take a nap? Then you let me roll you over and fuck you senseless?” His voice rose on the last.
Temper roared through her. She shoved him, and he released her arms. “Listen, jackwad.” Her voice shook. “I found the letter and came up here to discuss it with you. I don’t need Jax to tell me what to do. Finally, this most recent fuck wasn’t good enough to make me remotely senseless.”
His head jerked back. “Excuse me?”
If danger had a tone, he’d just used it. She deliberately lifted one shoulder. “Eh. You’ve done better.” What the holy hell was she doing, poking the beast? She couldn’t help it. He was just so damn arrogant and scary. “I’m a very good profiler, and while I know you’re a big bad with a history, I don’t think you’d kidnap me and turn me over to the Mercs.”
He glowered. “Oh. Don’t you?”
She wavered and then straightened her spine, even though she was naked and on her knees. “No. Besides, Lynne knows about the letter, too. My guess is that you have about thirty minutes to find Jax and confess all, or she’ll do it for you.”
Raze’s eyes glittered. “At least that’s somewhat of a backup plan.”
She shook her head. “Wait a minute. You’re angry I didn’t turn you in?”
“Yes,” he exploded. “My God! The world is a dangerous place, and there’s a chance I’m not gonna be here tomorrow to cover your ass. So you need to cover your ass and protect yourself, no matter what.”
She chuckled.
His face flushed a deep red. On most guys, it would look like a heart attack was imminent. Not Raze. Not even close. His fury was darker, dangerous. Raw and primal in a way that had her quickly biting her lip. No laughing. No more laughing.
She breathed out. “You’re mad because I didn’t turn you in, and I need to do things like turn you in because you may not be here to protect me tomorrow.”
“Exactly.”
She just gaped. The man had gone and totally lost his mind. “Are you listening to yourself?” she whispered.
He headed for the couch to yank up faded jeans. He turned while drawing down a black Metallica T-shirt. “Stay here.”
She scrambled out of bed and hurriedly dressed. “I’m coming with you.”
He stepped toward her, and she hastily retreated, falling on the bed to sit.
“Stay. Here.”
“N-no.” Her stupid voice quivered, but she stood again. “There’s less of a chance that Jax will shoot you in the head if I’m standing next to you.”
Raze’s head tilted just enough to be threatening. Incredibly thoughtful, deliberately threatening. “Not gonna say it again.”
That probably didn’t mean he was going to agree with her if she argued. “We need to come up with a plan,” she croaked.
“I have a plan, finally. My last meeting with the Mercs gave me the location of the next meet. Tonight I’ll go get Maureen, and I’ll bring her back here.” He turned on his heel.
Vinnie rushed after him and smashed right into his back when he stopped moving.
He pivoted and lifted her by the arms.
“Eek.” Shock stilled her for precious moments as he walked backward, grabbing a belt from a pile of discarded clothing on the way. She struggled then, panic consuming her.
He set her down on her ass beneath the window, not hard but definitely not gentle. Quick, smooth movements had him easily tying her to the rickety, useless old radiator. He sat back on his haunches, surveying his handiwork.
“You goddamstupidmotherfucker,” she spat.
He stilled. His lips tipped almost in a smile.
She kicked out and nailed him in the thigh.
He stopped smiling. “Man, you’re a handful.” Leaning in, he fisted her hair and held her face right beneath him. His heated breath brushed her lips, and his fiery gaze warmed her entire body. “If I make it back, you and I are gonna have a little chat. You might want to reflect on the fact that I’ve tamed wilder animals than you.” He pressed a hard kiss on her lips, turned, and strode out the door before she could say a word.
Fury burned through her like a flash fire. She pulled against the restraint, but it held fast. Oh, she was going to kill him.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Behavior is the most important aspect in studying the true nature of man.
—Dr. Vinnie Wellington, Sociopaths
Raze found Jax pounding on a punching bag in the basement. His movements were fluid and fast . . . and his strikes were aimed to kill instead of subdue. “Jax.”
Jax stopped and turned, sweat rolling down his face. “Where’s Vinnie?”
“Tied up.” Raze hadn’t regained his full strength after having the fever, and he knew it. But he was fast, and his training for the military matched Jax’s. If they fought to the death, it’d be close. Hell, they might both die. “I told her I wanted to speak with you alone. Where’s Lynne?”
“Sleeping. She’s working too hard.” Jax rolled his neck. He’d left his hands and knuckles bare for his boxing session, and they were already turning purple.
“You’re one tough bastard,” Raze murmured.
Jax lifted an eyebrow. “What’s it going to be? You telling me all, trying to kill me, or leaving?”
“Are those my only three options?” Raze drawled, his body settling.
“Yes.”
Raze leaned against the doorframe. “How about option four?”
“Go on.”
“I leave tonight, do the mission I’d intended, and then return tomorrow?” Raze lifted his chin. “Then we go on, and I serve Vanguard and its people.” It shocked him how much he wanted to do just that. Wanted to belong and find a place in this new world for himself.
Jax shook out his scarred right arm. “I want to read the letter. Lynne said Vinnie found it.”
Raze nodded and reached into his back pocket to draw it out. He handed it to Jax.
Jax slowly unfolded the worn paper and read, his expression revealing nothing. Finally, he refolded the note and handed it back to Raze.
“Well?” Raze asked, shoving it in his front pocket.
Jax struck with a right cross, followed up by a left to the gut.
Pain exploded in Raze’s face and torso. He bent over and grunted, instinctively lifting with an uppercut that jerked Jax’s head back with an audible snap.
Jax kicked Raze’
s knee in a sweep, ducking as Raze aimed a punch for his temple.
Raze roared as agony split his knee and jumped Jax in a tackle, tumbling them both to the mat. They rolled, both punching, both trying to find leverage with their feet.
The fight lasted nearly thirty minutes. Neither tried for a kill shot, but pain remained on the table, and both men were more than willing to cause it.
At some point, Tace and Sami entered the room. Tace blocked the door, his gaze intent, watching them. Sami slid to the floor, her legs extended, and munched on what smelled like popcorn. A few times Raze could see her wince, but she didn’t make a move to stop the fight.
Raze leaped backward to his feet, his vision fading, his muscles protesting. Jax jumped up and rushed him.
At that point, Tace stepped between the two men. “Enough.”
“Get the fuck out of the way,” Jax snapped, punching around Tace to hit Raze in his aching jaw.
“Yeah.” Raze pivoted and bent his leg, kicking around Tace.
“Stop it right this second!” Lynne Harmony yelled from the doorway. She ran inside and wedged herself between Tace and Jax.
Raze stilled. He couldn’t hurt the little scientist. Small hands grabbed his shirt and yanked him back. He turned and looked down at Vinnie. “How the hell did you get free?”
The promise to kill him all but glowed in her eyes. “Lynne dropped by to see how our talk went.”
“I need to get a lock for the damn door.” Raze wiped sweat and blood off his chin. Now that he’d stopped moving, his entire body throbbed in agony. There wasn’t a square inch of him that wasn’t bruised or battered. “How about the scientists get the hell out of here, and we finish our talk, Jax?”
“Damn good idea.” Jax walked right into Lynne, forcing her to back toward the doorway.
She planted both hands on his chest, seeming not to care about the blood and sweat. “I am not leaving.”
Vinnie nodded vigorously. “You tell him, sister.”
Jax looked over his shoulder at the profiler. “I’m glad you two have bonded. Now go mind your own damn business.”