I jerk awake and wipe sleep from my eyes, surprised to find myself in the front seat of my car, not back home in bed. I must have fallen asleep by accident. I was sitting here after attempting to get my car unstuck for the second time. I cried for a little, ate a smashed granola bar I found wedged between my back seats, played a sad CD and imagined it was the soundtrack of my life, cried more, and then at some point I must have put my head down on the center console and dozed off.
TAP. TAP. TAP.
I jump a mile in the air and whip my attention to where someone is standing on the other side of my driver’s side door, tapping a flashlight against my window. The rain didn’t wake me up, he did.
A thousand slasher-movie scenarios play through my mind in a matter of seconds. I’m in the middle of nowhere. It’s still raining. There’s a person dressed in all black trying to break his way into my car. At first I’m worried that he’ll want to have his way with me, but then I remember I’m covered in mud, smell a little funky, and generally look like the scary girl from The Ring.
“I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING GOOD IN HERE!” I shout. “I have no money and nobody loves me, so there’s no chance for a ransom!”
The flashlight clicks off, and everything goes dark.
I pinch my eyes closed and prepare for a swift death.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
ADAM
After leaving Madeleine’s apartment, I called Lucas to alert him about the situation. He got Daisy involved and within a few minutes, it seemed like everyone in town was mounting a search for Madeleine. I took Mouse back to my house and washed him off. After he had food and water and I was sure all the doors were closed and securely locked, I headed back out and joined the search myself.
The rain didn’t let up for hours, and around midnight, Daisy insisted we call Carter. I was hesitant to get the police involved—after all, it wasn’t as if she was a missing person—but as the minutes continued to tick by and there was no sign of Madeleine, I decided we could use all the help we could get.
I go back to her apartment around 3:30 AM. The receipt I taped to the door sits on the ground a few feet away, drenched. I call her cell phone and this time, there’s no chime from inside. No doubt it’s dead. How many people have tried calling her in the last few hours?
I turn and slide down to the ground, bending my knees and resting my forehead on them. I’m exhausted and drained of ideas. I know I could be out there doing more—maybe there are places we haven’t thought to check yet.
Hamilton isn’t large, but when you’re looking for one woman among acres and acres of farmland, it feels hopeless.
She’s okay.
She’s not in danger.
Even repeating the sentiment to myself, it doesn’t quite stick.
If she was okay, she would have come back by now. She would have come back for her phone, or to check to see if Mouse had returned, and if she had, she would have seen the note and called me, or Daisy, or Lucas.
Nothing makes sense.
I know I should lift my head and stand, head back out there and keep looking for her, but there’s nowhere to go. I want to be here when she gets back, so I close my eyes and wait.
At some point I fall asleep, for a few minutes or a few hours, I can’t tell.
I blink and glance down at my watch. It’s barely 6:00 AM and Madeleine still isn’t home. She would have woken me up on her way inside.
I call Lucas, and when there’s no answer, I resist the urge to throw my phone at the wall across from me. It’s useless. There’s no one else I can call. I don’t have Daisy or Carter’s number. I try Lucas one more time, and it goes straight to voicemail.
Then a police cruiser pulls up in front of Madeleine’s apartment complex. The lights are off and I can’t see through the tinted windows. I assume they’re here because of the missing persons calls—maybe Daisy forced them to expedite the report—but then I see someone step out, and from the passenger side, Madeleine follows.
I leap to my feet.
“Madeleine!”
She glances up and I register the exhaustion right away. She’s completely disheveled. There’s mud covering her legs up to her knees and her arms are just as dirty. A gray police-issue blanket rests across her shoulders and when she walks toward me barefoot, she winces as if in pain.
Carter rushes around to help her, but I’m there first, holding up most of her weight as we walk toward her apartment.
“What happened to you?” I ask, all my residual anger and fatigue gone.
I’m just so happy to see her, to know she’s all right.
She smiles up at me a bit sheepishly. “Long story. Have you seen Mouse?”
“He’s at my house, probably in need of a bathroom break.”
She closes her eyes for a moment and sighs, as if finding peace after the longest night of her life.
“I want to go with you when you let him out.”
Carter is there with us when Madeleine unlocks her door. I have so many questions I want to ask. Where’s her car? Her shoes? Why did she leave her house without her cell phone? How did Mouse get out in the first place? Why did Carter drive her back home in his cruiser?
Instead of bombarding her, I swallow down each question and quietly follow her inside.
She stands in the threshold, trying to get her bearings.
“Carter, after I grab some shoes and my cell phone, I’m going to head to Adam’s house. You can meet us there.”
“What?” I ask, staring back and forth between them.
Madeleine puts her hand on my arm. “Carter is going to have a friend help him with my car. It’s stuck in the mud out by the dog park a couple miles from here.”
Pride rises inside me as if I’m a petulant sixteen-year-old boy. “I can help you get your car. I’m sure Carter is tired.”
Her fingers squeeze my arm and her eyes implore me to listen. “Just let him do it. I want you to drive me to your house so I can see Mouse, and then I need some coffee and food. I’m starving.”
I glance back at Carter, who’s watching Madeleine like she’s a china doll about to crack. “Are you sure that’s okay?” I ask. “I could always come help you after I drop Madeleine off.”
“No,” she answers for him. “I want you to stay with me.”
Carter glances away and then meets my eyes. All hints of admiration for Madeleine are gone, replaced with his cop-on-duty expression. “It’s no problem. I’ll pick up the other officer on my way to the park and then he can drive Madeleine’s car to your house. Shouldn’t take us long now that the rain has finally let up.”
“Thank you, Carter,” Madeleine says, releasing my arm so she can give him a quick hug. “Seriously, I owe you.”
…
I assume Madeleine and I will have some time to talk in the car on the way to my house, but there isn’t a spare second. Once she plugs in her cell phone and turns it on, she’s bombarded with message after message. She spends every minute in the car and the first half hour at my house returning phone calls and assuring everyone that she and Mouse are all right.
When I come down from my shower, she glances up from the kitchen table with an exasperated expression. “Daisy and Lucas are about to arrive. I tried to tell them everything was okay, but Daisy insisted.”
I nod, trying not to let my disappointment show. “I don’t blame her. They were both worried about you.”
She opens her mouth to say something and then shakes her head and looks down. Mouse is at her feet. He’s been at her side since her arrival, when she flung her arms around him and cried. He licked her face and wagged his tail, just as happy to be reunited.
“Would it be okay if I showered really quick?”
I snap back to the present. “Of course. C’mon, I’ll show you where the towels are.”
She’s still a mess from last night, but it’s nothing a quick shower can’t fix. I put together the bits and pieces of what happened from her phone calls with other people—the rain, the mud,
the tires spinning until she was stuck overnight. Carter found her this morning and now here she is, in my bathroom, waiting for me to leave before she tugs her tank top overhead.
It’s silly. We’ve had sex. I’ve seen her bare body from head to toe. I know she has a little freckle on her left breast, right at the top.
“Adam?” She’s smiling and her cheeks, though streaked with mud, are the lightest shade of pink.
I reach down to kiss her just as a car pulls up into the driveway.
“Oh! I bet that’s Daisy,” she says when my mouth is barely an inch from hers.
I sigh and stand, giving us both some space.
“I’ll stall them while you shower.”
She bites her lip. “Are you sure? I can wait and shower later.”
I laugh. “Madeleine, no offense, but you sort of stink. Now I’ll go get you some small dish towels to dry off with.”
She bats me out of the bathroom and closes the door. The lock clicks into the place, and then I hear her voice calling out for me.
“Adam?”
I press back against the door. “Yeah?”
“I just…Thanks for going to my apartment to check on me last night. Daisy said it was you who initiated the whole search. If you hadn’t come, I’d probably still be stuck out there.”
It strikes me as odd that we’re having this conversation with a door between us, but then, Madeleine and I still haven’t had time to put our relationship back on course. Maybe this is all she can muster. I press my forehead to the door and close my eyes, enjoying this moment for what it is.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
MADELEINE
The last twelve hours have been an utter disaster, and though I’d love nothing more than to crawl into Adam’s bed and sleep the day away, we seem to have initiated a full-on party.
“Hey, they don’t call it a search party for nothing,” Daisy says, clinking her coffee with mine.
I resist the urge to roll my eyes.
By the time I finished with my shower, she and Lucas were downstairs at the dining table, spreading out the food they’d picked up on the way over: donuts and kolaches, cinnamon rolls and mini muffins. Adam was filling them in on the missing details from last night, and I’d barely loaded up a cinnamon roll on my plate when Carter and a fellow officer pulled into the driveway with my car.
If possible, the hunk of junk looks even worse than it did last night, as if I had taken it mudding on some country back-roads. The duct-taped mirror on the passenger side is still somehow clinging on for dear life, but the steam rising from the hood is pretty hard to ignore.
“I hate to say it, Daisy, but this car just might be toast,” Carter says, popping the hood. Plumes of steam rise up, and Adam shoots me a knowing glare.
“Yeah, I actually had plans to get it looked at this morning, but obviously I’ve been busy with other things.”
Carter waves away the steam. “Unless you’re willing to drop a couple thousand for a new engine, there’s no point trying to salvage this thing. What is it, prehistoric?”
I prop my hands on my hips. “I’ll have you know I’ve driven this car since high school and it has been dependable—”
“Not true,” Adam cuts in.
“And trustworthy—”
“Nope.”
“For all these years.”
“Half the time it won’t start,” he tells Carter.
“Well I’m not just going to throw it away!”
Adam claps Carter on the shoulder and then nods to the other officer. “Thanks for getting her car, man. Do you two want to come in for some coffee? Daisy brought enough donuts to feed an army.”
Carter pats his flat stomach, his friend does the same, and then the three of them disappear into the house.
“Don’t worry,” I whisper to my car. “I’m not getting rid of you.”
The morning passes slowly as we all huddle in the kitchen, refilling our coffee and going back for donuts even though we’ve all been full for hours. I keep assuming everyone will eventually excuse themselves and leave, but no one’s in a hurry. Apparently, we’ve all taken a sick day from work.
“No one wants me diagnosing patients on two hours of sleep,” Daisy explains.
And like that, it’s decided—no one is leaving.
Adam takes the guys around the property, and Daisy corners me in the kitchen.
“You and Adam are being really weird.”
“Are we?”
“Yeah, don’t play dumb. You sat next to him earlier and when he put his arm on your chair, you flinched. What was that about?”
I sigh and glance out to make sure the guys are still outside. “Olivia was at the training class last night.”
She frowns. “Olivia. Olivia…”
“His ex-fiancée! Olivia!”
Her eyes nearly bulge out of her head. “Oh! Olivia! Oh God, I bet that was awkward. Why was she there?”
I shrug. “Actually, I’m not sure. He might have invited her. Hence the unresolved weirdness in the air.”
She shakes her head. “What do you mean you aren’t sure? I thought you two were dating—why would he invite Olivia to the training class?”
“I don’t know…” I stare down at my coffee cup. “They might be getting back together.”
She punches my arm and coffee spills down the front of the t-shirt Adam lent me. “Hey! Watch it.”
She dabs halfheartedly at the stain with a paper towel. “Sorry, sorry. I need more details. How is he possibly getting back with Olivia? The last time we spoke, I thought they just went to dinner for closure or some bullshit like that.”
“Well, she showed up at the YMCA last night looking like a Disney princess, and then she announced to the class that she was Adam’s fiancée.”
Daisy slaps her hand over her mouth in shock. “No!”
“Yes. So I left early and that’s why I was by myself when Mouse went missing.”
“You’ve had quite the eventful twelve hours.”
I can’t bring myself to laugh. “Unfortunately.”
“And you and Adam haven’t talked things over since?”
“Nope. For all I know, he could still be engaged at this very moment.”
“Well it’s a good sign that Olivia isn’t here. But clearly you guys need to talk.”
I snort. “Why do you think I was kicking your leg under the table during breakfast?”
“I thought that was Lucas!”
“Oh Jesus.” I roll my eyes.
Now that I have Daisy on my side, I assume she’ll march up to her husband and insist that they need to leave. She does try, but Lucas shakes his head.
“We’ll go in a little while.”
A little while turns into a few hours. Pizza is ordered for lunch, and I’m sitting in the living room, silently nursing my third cup of coffee, wondering how I can convince all of them to leave. Adam is sitting across the room, talking to Carter about cars…or vegetable gardening, I don’t know. I lost track thirty minutes ago.
“Is that someone pulling up the driveway?” Daisy asks.
“You’ve got to be kidding me.”
Five pairs of eyes whip over to me and I laugh.
“I mean, you’ve got to be kidding me, ha ha,” I repeat in a forced jovial tone. “More well-wishers for little ol’ me?!”
Adam laughs, and I think he’s the only one who feels my pain.
Across the room, Mouse emits a noise I’ve never heard before. It’s a slow-building whine that makes me think he’s dying.
“Mouse? Buddy?” I rush over to him, but his attention is laser focused out the window. I follow his gaze and find Adam’s mom strolling up the front path with Molly at her feet.
Mouse emits another guttural moan and then leaps off the couch. He darts to the door and jumps, scratching at it to get to this golden retriever who is apparently his one true love.
“Mouse! No! Bad dog.” I try to pull him back, but he’s too strong. Adam comes behind me and gr
abs his collar, pulling back with both hands.
“What’s wrong with him?” Daisy asks.
“He’s a Capulet, and his Montague is out there,” I whisper.
“What?”
“Is that Molly?” asks Adam. His smile drops. “With Olivia?”
My heart breaks. “No, with your mom.”
Olivia will probably be by shortly, just as soon as she finishes applying perfect winged eyeliner and brushing up on her French.
The front door opens and in what I can only describe as a lover’s reunion, Mouse breaks free of Adam’s hold and darts toward Molly at full speed. I cover my eyes with my hands, preparing for the worst, but when I pry them open again, Mouse is lying on his back with his paws in the air—a universal sign of submission. I’ve seen him do it a hundred times with other dogs, but with Molly, it looks as if he’s thrown himself on the ground and is pleading with her to have him.
I love you, his eyes implore. Molly stands beside him, peering down for only a second before she barks and licks his face. Then, they’re off, tearing through the house at breakneck speeds.
“Open the back door!” Adam shouts to Lucas.
He does so just as they race past and head out into the pasture.
“They’re in love,” I explain to the room full of curious onlookers. “I think that’s why he ran away last night. He went to look for her.”
“Aw!” Daisy exclaims. “That’s adorable.”
We all go peer out the back window; sure enough, they’re frolicking in the grass, taking turns chasing one another. It looks like a cliché dog food commercial.
“Diane, can I get you some coffee?” I ask when I turn back to the group.
Please say no, please say no.
Her eyes light up. “Actually, I’d love some. I had an early morning and I forgot to take some out on the road with me.”
Of course. Why did I even dare to hope otherwise? Adam and I will never be alone. This parade of people will continue until eventually I lose my remaining grip on sanity, hoist him up against a wall by his lapels and shout, ARE YOU STILL WITH HER?! JUST TELL ME!
For now, I move into the kitchen like a robot, pouring Diane coffee and counting backward from ten so I don’t lose my cool in front of everyone. I hear footsteps behind me and expect it to be Diane, but then I catch a whiff of Adam’s body wash. Mountain-man freshness makes me straighten and pause.