Xander nodded but he kept his eyes on Riley as she moved over to stand beside Carl in a position meant to defend John from any possible threat. The only problem was that they both had their backs turned to what may become the biggest threat in the room. It could be hours before John woke again, they would know then what it was they were trying protecting.
Moving from the kitchen, he stood in the doorway as he surveyed the people gathered within the room. One of them he'd known most of his life, five others he'd only known for a couple of months and yet they were as close to him as family. The others, he'd encountered more but they were already becoming an important part of his life. They may not have gotten off to the best start with Rusty, but if he and his children proved themselves then Xander suspected they would be adding more members to their growing family.
"Al told me about what you saw," he said to Rusty.
Rusty lifted his gaze from John's body. "War?"
"Yes," Xander confirmed. Riley and Carl shifted; they glanced at him questioningly before focusing on Rusty again. "We saw Death."
"It is true," Claire breathed.
"It's true," Xander confirmed and proceeded to tell them what they'd witnessed last night, and what happened yesterday with Josh.
"Do you think it left earth after?" Leah asked anxiously.
"I don't know. Hopefully it was called back to wherever it came from. Or maybe it's riding through some new area of the world today."
"The horsemen were never our battle," Al said. "We could have gone the rest of our lives and never known they were here. There are other things out there…"
"The sick are dying," Carl said. "Or at least they appear to be."
"We saw the same thing," Mary Ellen said. "The human body can't withstand whatever is ravaging through them. From what we've seen it's only a matter of time before the body gives out completely."
All of their eyes turned to John's immobile body on the table. Riley and Carl stepped closer together in an attempt to shield John but it was impossible to do so completely. Nancy edged her way in front of Riley and Carl and toward the front of the table. Carl moved with her, the look on his face saying more than words that he wouldn't hesitate to take her down if she so much as took a threatening step toward John.
She reached the front of the table and crossed herself before falling to her knees. Her hands clasped before her as she bowed her head and began to pray, or at least that was what he assumed she was doing, as she never uttered a word out loud. He felt Riley's gaze burning into him and turned to look at her. Deep shadows lined her eyes, he knew she hadn't slept in at least twenty-four hours but her bloodshot eyes were still alert. Beside him, Al shifted back and forth. Across the way, Claire hitched an eyebrow up at Nancy.
There may be a God but it didn't seem as if everyone was willing to forgive him, or her, if Carl and John were right. Even as he thought it, Rusty turned on his heel and walked out of the cabin. Xander stared at Rusty's back as he hurried down the steps and toward the lake. His gaze fell on Rochelle, sitting on the couch with Freddie's arm around her and Victor pressed against her other side. She had started to cry the minute she'd seen John, her tears had only intensified when she'd learned of Josh's early demise. Her eyes were dry now, bloodshot and swollen, but they were unwavering when they met his.
"John brought something back for you," he told her. "Come on, I'll show it to you."
She glanced at John before rising to her feet. Mary Ellen followed them onto the porch. Rochelle let out a delighted cry when she spotted the trailer; she leapt off of the porch and raced toward the trailer.
Mary Ellen glanced at him and then shook her head. "What are we going to do with a horse?"
"I don't know."
"Where are we even going to keep it?"
"In the trailer?" As if on cue the animal kicked the side of the trailer again, drawing the attention of Rusty from where he stood by the lake. "Or not."
"Feed it?"
"That we did think of." He was happy to have at least one answer for her right now, but he had no idea how long the food they'd brought with them would last. "The horse was something John wanted for her and we didn't have the heart to deny him."
Mary Ellen glanced into the cabin behind her, then at the trailer. Her shoulders slumped as she sighed. "Yeah, I understand. Well let's go see this beast."
"He's actually kind of cute."
"Oh well that makes it all perfectly acceptable then."
Xander laughed as he followed her down the stairs and toward the trailer. He could already hear Rochelle talking excitedly to the horse. "Do you think it will bring one of them here?" Mary Ellen asked.
"They don't want anything to do with us," Rusty said as he joined them on the walk toward the trailer. "Even if they come for the horse, they won't bother us."
"I really don't need her new pet turning to ash or whatever else they become," Mary Ellen replied.
Rusty gave a low chuckle and ran his hand through his hair. "I can understand that."
They found Rochelle standing in the doorway of the trailer, petting the head of the horse that had calmed down a lot since she'd entered the trailer with him. It took the three of them to get the horse off the trailer. They tied together a bunch of rope, wrapped it around a tree on the other side of the cabin and secured the horse to it. He had enough room to roam but was safely away from the ditches surrounding the cabin. Eventually they would have to figure out a more permanent solution but it would do for now. Rochelle immediately started brushing the horse with the brushes she'd discovered in the trailer while she carried on a one-sided conversation with her new friend. Freddie and Victor emerged from the cabin and carefully approached Rochelle and the animal.
Xander savored in their happiness for a minute. He wanted to stand there and watch them for hours, but unfortunately there were less pleasant things to deal with. He turned to Rusty. "Josh's body is in the back of the truck, I need help burying him. We can do a ceremony later but we have to get him in the ground."
Rusty nodded. "I'll help you."
"Keep the children distracted," he said to Mary Ellen.
"I will."
She walked across the clearing to the kids. When Xander was certain none of them were looking, he opened the back doors of the truck and climbed in. Rusty helped him unload Josh's body. They hurried past the cabin and into the woods. Xander paused to retrieve the shovels leaning against the side of the cabin before walking deeper into the forest with Rusty. Xander kept a watchful eye on Rusty as they worked silently together to dig the hole and carefully placed Josh's body inside.
"Thank you," Xander said to him when they were finished covering the hole.
"I'm sorry for your loss." Rusty held the shovel out to him.
Xander bowed his head and took the tool from him. They walked back to the cabin; Xander returned it to where he had found it. Spotting them, Mary Ellen walked over to join them. "Is it done?" she inquired.
"It is," he confirmed. "We'll do something for a memorial when John is feeling better. There are supplies in the truck to unload."
Tears brimmed in Mary Ellen's eyes but she followed them over to the truck. None of them spoke while they unloaded the supplies from the truck but he worked steadily beside the two of them. Unwilling to look at it, Xander threw a t-shirt over the dried blood staining the wooden truck bed.
"Do you intend to stay with us now?" Xander asked Rusty as they dropped some clothing on the porch.
Rusty frowned and wiped his arm across his forehead. "I'd like to see if he pulls through."
"Are you hoping he does or he doesn't?"
Rusty did a double take that Xander knew couldn't be faked. "I don't want him to die. I don't want anyone to die. I've seen someone turn and I've seen what those things are capable of."
"We all have."
"You really were bitten?" Rusty inquired.
Mary Ellen dropped some more clothes on the porch as Rusty asked the question. She glanced nervously at
Xander; he stared at Rusty for a minute before bending down and rolling up the pant leg of his jeans. He didn't sense anything hostile from Rusty, just curiosity and some disbelief. The scar from the bite mark was still red and puckered but it had healed well considering what it could have been. Sadness flickered over Rusty's face as he stepped back.
"It was pure luck," Xander told him. "That we combined the medications we did. We could have tried a million other combinations but Bobby had had poison ivy and knew about the steroids, and I was allergic to penicillin."
"And Bobby is?" Rusty inquired.
"He was a friend of ours that didn't make it," Mary Ellen answered.
"Al told me one of you had become sick. Was he the one the girl with the gun said she put down?"
Xander rolled his pant leg back down. "Believe it or not there was a time when she'd never even touched a gun. Riley's an amazing person, with a big heart, but she's a bear when it comes to her friends and we've lost too many of them while trying to get here. And no, Bobby was overtaken by some of those things. Lee was another friend of ours who became sick and she was forced to kill him."
"I think we've all had a bad time of it," Rusty said and turned away from him.
"You lost your wife?" Xander guessed as they all walked toward the truck again.
"Yes, and others."
He didn't elaborate and Xander didn't press him. There was no reason to exchange horror stories, to pick at old scabs and rehash things that could never be changed. It wouldn't bond them closer, wouldn't make them trust each other any more. That would take time and shared experiences.
With the truck unpacked, they gathered in the cabin to eat lunch. Uneasiness grew in Xander as he watched Nancy rise and walk over to the window before returning to kneel by John. She did it two more times in the short period he was inside. She'd never been completely stable but the revelation of the horsemen had rattled her even more.
Xander stayed with Riley and the others for a little bit but eventually he wandered outside again. He couldn't take the alternate praying and anxious pacing anymore. He had to get away from John's unmoving, sweat covered body. Perhaps they should all be praying but he was convinced it would only fall upon deaf ears. There had probably been more praying over the past couple of months than over the past ten years combined. He doubted many of those prayers had been answered.
He wasn't about to curse God though, it would be useless. He assumed the force that had struck down most of its creations was as completely apathetic to them as it had been all along. No prayer was going to change that now.
Riley reluctantly gave up her position as guard after a couple of hours to Al, but even she couldn't deny she could barely stand anymore. Xander was glad to get her out of that stuffy cabin and away from the others. They went down to their spot by the lake. She tried to fight it but she fell asleep in his arms within five minutes of settling down.
Xander held her against him as he watched the sunset over the water. He didn't look up when Rochelle, Victor, and Freddie settled in around them and sat silently. The warmth of Rochelle's shoulder pressed against his gave him some comfort. She drew her knees up and hugged them to her chest. A twig breaking announced Donald, Claire and Mary Ellen before they stepped around the rocks and spread out around them. Riley's breath warmed the skin on his neck, she didn't stir but he knew she was awake when her lashes fluttered open against his neck.
It didn't matter if some large mystical being had decided to destroy the world. Sitting here, watching the colors of the sun spreading across the water, with a person he'd always loved and others that he'd come to love and care for deeply, he knew he'd found a little piece of heaven. It wouldn't last, not with everything they still had to face, not with John's life still hanging precariously in the balance, but to have this moment was something precious. Something that he cherished as he held Riley closer against him.
Rochelle's head dropped to his shoulder when sleep claimed her. He could sense the exhaustion in those around him but none of them moved as night descended. Tomorrow they could deal with things; tonight was for them and the crickets chirruping loudly around them. An owl hooted in the distance as the moon's rays began to sparkle across the water.
The crunch of a footstep brought their heads around. Rusty emerged around the corner of the rocks. "Carl sent me to get you. John's waking up."
Riley pulled from his arms and leapt to her feet. Turning to Rochelle, he gently shook her awake as the others began to rise. "How is he?" Riley demanded.
"I don't know, he just started moving," Rusty answered.
He thought Riley was going to take off but she held her hand out to him and waited. Her hand shook within his as they hurried toward the cabin with the others. He tried not to get his expectations up, tried to remain reasonable about everything, but he was nearly running by the time they were halfway to the cabin.
Their feet slapped against the porch, he pulled Riley back before they could enter the cabin. He didn't want her to see it if something had gone horribly wrong. She'd seen and experienced many horrible things but he'd still like to try and keep her sheltered from some of it, if he could. He should have known better. There was no keeping her back from something when she wanted it.
Xander braced himself to discover a monster inside, braced himself for John already having been killed, even if he hadn't heard a gunshot. He was ready for every horrible thing imaginable, he wasn't ready for John to be sitting at the edge of the table with his hands wrapped around it, his shoulders hunched up around his ears, and his head bowed down chin to his chest.
John lifted his head sluggishly, as if the gesture still hurt him, and blinked at them. Shadows encircled his eyes, his cheeks were sunken, and his eyes were bloodshot but when he saw them a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.
"You look like you've seen a ghost," John muttered.
Xander glanced at all of the gaping mouths, and stunned expressions surrounding him and couldn't help but smile. It wasn't the incredulous looks of those surrounding him that had him grinning like an idiot, but the sight of John looking as if he'd been hit by truck.
"How do you feel?" Riley asked anxiously.
"As good as I look, or so I'm told," he said with a pointed look at Carl.
Carl shrugged, but he smiled as he rested his hand on John's shoulder. "Well you do look like sh… crap," Carl hastily amended when his eyes landed on the children.
John gave him a halfhearted finger but the gesture almost caused him to topple off the table. Carl and Al grabbed him back before he could fall. Rochelle broke away from the others and hurried over to him, she hesitated for a second before carefully wrapping her arms around John's neck. "I'm glad you're ok," she whispered and took a step away.
"I'm not going to break kid," he assured her but he looked as if he might.
"I love my present."
He appeared more like a scarecrow than a man right now, but his smile lit his face as he squeezed Rochelle's hand. "I promised you a horse."
Rochelle began to cry; she threw her arms around him again and hugged him close. The others crept closer when Rochelle stepped away. Hugs were exchanged; even Rusty's family shared in the laughter as John was helped from the table and over to the couch. Mary Ellen shook out another high dosage of medicine for John but he waved the water away.
"I know I carried some beer out of Walmart," John told her.
Mary Ellen gave him a disapproving look but John held her steely gaze. She finally relented with a nod. Carl carried over a thirty rack of beer and placed it in the middle of the floor. Alcohol probably wasn't the best thing for John to wash his medicine down with, but no one argued his choice. Warm beers were passed around the room to those that could and would drink. An air of normalcy surrounded them as the pop of can tops filled the room.
"To Josh," John said and lifted his can toward the middle of the room.
"To Josh," a chorus of voices sounded.
The beer, though warm, was one of th
e most delicious things he'd ever tasted, Xander decided as it slid down his throat. "And to everyone else we've loved and lost," Xander said and raised his half-empty can into the air again.
Another chorus of voices sounded, the cans crashed against each other. Xander wrapped his arm around Riley's shoulders and kissed her temple as he drank down the rest of his beer. There would be a watch to take later, endless things to do tomorrow, but right now was just for them. It was for the people that had risen up to fight against a world trying to tear them apart. Risen up against enemies and threats they never dreamt could have existed only months ago.
They'd done some things they'd regretted over the past few months, but they hadn't given up and they hadn't given into the worst parts of themselves like Yosemite and others like him had.
In the absolute worst of times they'd bonded together with strangers and created a family that loved and cared for each other just as deeply as a family of blood relatives would.
Yes, this night was for them and them alone. Tonight was for the survivors.
EPILOGUE
We didn't know what to do for the first anniversary of the apocalypse, but the one thing everyone agreed on was that no one wanted to sit around and weep. In the end the decision was taken away from us by Carl, John, Xander, and Riley arriving with an armload of whiskey and rum they'd raided from a farm home in the nearby countryside. Maybe throwing a party wasn't the best way to celebrate the end of the world as we had always known it, but that was exactly what we did.
It was very tempting to give in and have a couple of drinks with everyone but in the end I decided to forgo it. I'd come too far to regress to my former self again now. The celebration went on into the morning hours but the stories told throughout the night were what fascinated me the most. The good memories were shared this time around, not the bad. These stories were all happy ones about families and friends no longer with us.