Desperately wanting him to answer my questions. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his desk. His thumb running back and forth over his lower lip, undressing me with his dilated, mysterious eyes. My heart sped up, heat raced through my veins from his not so subtle regard. When he caught me staring at the movement of his mouth, he leaned back and grinned again.
Growling, “If I fucked you, cariño. You'd know why too.”
Her eyes intensified, waiting for my next move. “My name isn't cariño.”
I peered deep into her eyes, and without thinking, I rasped. “When you own something, cariño, you can call it whatever you want.”
She beamed with a gleam in her eyes. Staring back at me with a starry gaze that was new and unfamiliar. “Only problem is, you don’t own me, Mr. Martinez,” she murmured so low I could barely hear her.
I chuckled, “I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but I own everything.” Once again leaning back into my chair, giving her the space she didn’t want.
“What does cariño mean?” she asked, changing the subject. Needing to control the effect I had on her. Unfolding her legs from beneath her, squirming a little in her chair.
“It’s a term of endearment in Spanish, like saying honey or baby.”
“Oh…” she purred.
“Don’t read too much into it, it’s a term I use loosely,” I lied.
“Oh…”
“I really like the way you say that,” I paused. “Cariño.”
She blushed, bowing her head so I wouldn’t notice. I was about to tell her to look me in the eyes when I was talking to her, but my phone rang, breaking our connection and ruining the moment. It was starting to take its toll on me. My willpower to stay away from her, fading more and more as the days went on. I actually looked forward to coming home to her. Wanting to make her laugh, to see her smile, to talk to her, to watch her fucking dance.
To have her in my bed every night… and every morning. I was falling for her, and I hadn’t even touched her, yet. Fuck, I had already fallen for her.
Which was a deadly combination for a man like me.
“Habla,” I answered, “Talk” on my phone.
“Boss, we have some trouble at the dance club.”
“Why is this my problem?”
“Trust me, boss. I wouldn’t have called if I didn’t think you would want to make it your problem.”
I hung up, throwing my phone on the desk. Taking a deep breath, pulling the hair back away from my face. The last thing I wanted to do was go back out at this time of the night. I was fucking exhausted, or at least that was what I told myself, knowing it had to do with the beautiful ballerina sitting in front of me.
“Is everything okay?” she asked, out of concern.
“I have to go.” I stood, grabbing my suit jacket from behind my chair.
“Can I come with you?” she warily questioned, bringing my attention back to her. Batting her fucking eyes at me.
“Lexi, I—”
“I promise I’ll listen to you,” she coaxed in the sweetest fucking voice, making it nearly impossible for me to say no to her.
“Your nose is actually growing right now. You are aware of that right?”
She bowed her head, disappointed.
“You have five minutes to meet me at the front door.”
She immediately peered back up at me with wide eyes. A smile spread across her face.
“If you’re not there. I’m leaving.”
She enthusiastically nodded. Bolting off the seat, hauling ass out of the room. Stumbling over her own two feet, catching herself at the last second. I laughed, not letting it deter her.
I shook my head, berating myself. “What the fuck are you doing, Alejandro?” I murmured, rubbing the back of my neck. Trying to ease the sudden splitting headache I felt looming.
I holstered my guns, put extra magazines, in my suit jacket. Grabbing my phone on my way out. Lexi was already waiting by the door when I walked up. Her long, dark hair flowed loosely around her gorgeous face. She was wearing a pair of low cut, tight fucking jeans that accentuated her luscious ass, and a belly shirt, which left very little to the imagination. A studded bellybutton ring hung temptingly on display. A pair of fuck-me heels, finished off her barely their getup.
“I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop, but I heard your man say they needed you at your dance club. I’ve never been to a club, so I didn’t know what to wear. I hope this—” I wiped off the red lipstick from her pouty goddamn lips.
“Your nose is growing again, cariño. Not trying to eavesdrop my ass.”
She threw her head back, laughing, and I resisted the urge to laugh with her. Instead, I grabbed her hand and led her out the door. “You don’t leave my side unless I tell you to. Do you understand me?”
She nodded, following me out to the limo with four bodyguards I had escorting us. Usually I would only take one, but since Lexi was with me, I chose to be overly cautious. I spent most of the ride on the phone, while Lexi sat beside me, fidgeting with her fingers. Her leg bouncing up and down, anticipating what the night would bring. At one point, I subconsciously reached over, placing my hand on her thigh to calm her. She tensed from the unexpected gesture, but I squeezed her thigh in reassurance. She relaxed, easing into my touch. I spent the rest of our ride trying like hell not to move my hand further up her thigh.
When we arrived at the club, I had the bodyguards do a sweep before letting Lexi out. The dance club was packed to the brim like it was every Friday night. Everyone dressed to the nines, my drugs and booze flowing like fucking water. It happened to be Latin night, the salsa rhythm pounded through the speakers. We walked in through the back entrance, avoiding the crowds I fucking hated. Drunken strangers, grinding up against you as you tried to make your way inside, was not my kind of night. I’d already done my share of partying. I was too old for this fucking shit. I left Lexi with the bodyguards at my VIP table, ordering them not to let anyone near her. I needed to make nice with some of the regular high rollers, who all spent a fuck load of money on everything I had to offer.
When I was done, I turned to find Lexi dancing, provocatively swaying her hips to the music without missing a beat. Not paying any mind to the sets of male eyes that were solely focused on her. I saw it happen before it actually went down, one of the men eye fucking the shit out of her, slid past the guards. The motherfucker caged Lexi in with his arms, pinning her against the wall. The fear in her eyes was enough for me to push through the fucking crowd, yelling at my men to turn the fuck around. I got to her just as they were about to intervene.
Roughly grabbing the random motherfucker by the back of his collared shirt, dragging him away from her. Throwing him up against the adjacent wall. It was my turn to cage him in.
“You don’t touch what fucking belongs to me,” I growled, knocking the fucker to his knees. Stepping back and nodding to my men to get this piece of shit out of my club. They would have to deal with my wrath later for not doing their fucking jobs.
I turned my attention back to Lexi, who was shaking in the corner from the motherfucker who scared her. As soon as she felt my touch against her cheek, my fingers caressing the side of her face, she relaxed.
“You okay?” I asked, pulling her into my body.
She nodded unable to form words yet. I hated seeing her weak. It physically pained me to watch her shut down. I acted on pure impulse, without thinking twice about it. I grabbed her hands, placing them around the back of my neck. Bringing her as close to my body as possible. Wrapping my arms around the small of her back, I savored the feel of her exposed skin, clinging to my back. I slowly spun us around in slow circles. Taking my time until she smiled, getting comfortable, and content again.
I rested my forehead on hers, staring deep into her bright, green eyes as I swayed around with her. Moving us effortlessly around our private space. Blocking out the people near us.
The moves.
The music.
All bringing back painful m
emories from my past. Seeing flashes of my mother and Sophia dancing and laughing in our living room. I hadn’t danced since then, another lifetime, another world, another man. I shook off the memories as fast as they came. Pushing Lexi away from my body, turning her in a circle, ending with a dip. She laughed, and I swear it was the most contagious sound. I looked down at her, both of us losing ourselves to the undeniable connection we always shared.
She stood up on the tips of her toes to whisper in my ear, “Thank you, Alejandro. For everything.”
The feel of her in my arms.
The smell of her against me.
The look in her eyes.
I didn’t fight it any longer. I smiled. Laughing with her, enjoying the fact that for the first time in a long time. I was happy.
With her.
The upbeat rhythm transitioned into a slower Latin melody. Lexi looked up at me through her lashes with lust filled eyes, begging for me to lean down and kiss her pouty lips. My smile faded, reality kicked back in.
What the fuck was I allowing to happen?
I completely let my guard down. “Fuck,” I breathed out, stepping back and away from her.
She stepped toward me, placing her hands on my chest. “What just happened? Why did you push me away?”
“Because you got me to smile and laugh with you in a span five minutes? Because I've changed? Because you’ve changed me? I’ll break it down for you, little girl. You make me lose sight of who I am, I’ll admit that. I find myself thinking of you in moments that I shouldn’t. I can’t have that, and…” I gestured in between us, “we can’t happen,” I snapped, turning back into the cold, callused man I needed to be.
She grimaced, her eyes instantly shutting. The hurt was plain as day on her face. She didn’t try to hide it. Her hands slid down my chest to her sides, defeated. It took everything inside me not to place them back on me again.
“Watch her. See what happens to you if you don’t this time,” I ordered my men, then turned and left not looking back. I couldn’t handle seeing the disappointment on her face.
I sifted through the crowd, making my way toward my office, to find out what the fuck was so important that I needed to be here. I honestly didn’t think the night could get any fucking worse.
“Fucking-A,” I spewed as soon as I saw a drugged out Austin Taylor, sitting in the seat in my office.
Briggs had left him a few months ago for reasons I didn’t want to get into. She just showed up on my goddamn door, late one night saying she needed a place to crash for a few days. Lexi was actually the one who answered the door and I almost bit her fucking head off for being so careless. I’m sure she was dying to get to know Briggs but I made sure that didn’t happen.
I spent the next fucking hour dealing with Austin, when all I wanted to do was be with Lexi. I actually wanted to fucking apologize, and tell her I didn’t mean it. Tell her whatever I needed to, to make things right again. I couldn’t get out of there soon enough. Finally, after what seemed like forever I was able to go back and find her. Leaving Austin in my office to sleep off his drug-induced haze, wanting to know where the fuck Briggs was.
I couldn’t help but feel responsible for him, thinking how much I had to do with his addiction. I shook that off like I did everything else that night.
“Boss, we didn’t—” I shoved him out of the way as I took in a drunk-ass fucking Lexi.
“Who the fuck gave it to her?” I seethed, trying to remain calm, but my limits were being pushed to the max.
“Well, you said to make sure she was taken care of,” he explained, gesturing to her dancing on the fucking table.
“I meant for you to make sure she was protected not let her become two sheets in the wind! Now get the fuck out of my face,” I yelled, shaking my head, ready to put some goddamn bullets in these worthless sons of bitches’ heads. I was over to her in two strides, reaching for her hands, pulling her down and over my shoulder. Carrying her off the table.
“Heeeeeyyyyyy… I was dancing… I don’t even likes yous anymores…” she slurred, reeking of whiskey, vodka, and God knows what the fuck else. Protesting by slapping my back and kicking her legs.
I sat us down on the leather couch, placing her swaying body next to me, her head spinning with a glazed over look in her eyes. She could barely hold her head up. Just one more thing to add to the clusterfuck of a night I was having.
“Boss, she’s fine. She’s just a little drunk,” Rick assured, trying to save his sorry ass.
As if on cue, Lexi leaned over toward me, and threw up in my lap. I held her hair back, scooting her face toward the floor as she continued to heave liquid, until she couldn’t anymore.
I shot him a menacing glare. “Obviously, she’s fucking not.”
“I’m sooooo sorry…” Lexi drunkenly giggled. “I feels betters though…”
I leaned her back up against the couch, wiping her mouth with a napkin. Ripping the glass of water from one of my men’s hands.
“Lexi, drink this.” I placed the glass near her lips.
“No… no… more… no more… drinkies.” She shook her head from the glass. Pushing it away, causing me to drop it. It shattered upon impact with the floor, near our feet.
“Fuck me,” I murmured, frustrated.
She peered up at me through her lashes, grinning. “You… don’t’s let’s me…”
I shook my head, trying hard as fuck not to laugh. Even drunk as shit, she was still fucking adorable. I cleaned my slacks up as best as I could, before standing and picking her up into my arms, cradling her like a baby. She leaned in, nestling into my chest, sighing in contentment as her body went lax, almost immediately passing out. She stayed just like that the entire ride back to my penthouse. Snuggled in my arms, softly snoring. I took her straight into her room, and stripped the clothes that smelt like puke off her body.
She inhaled my scent and half moaned, “Alejandro,” as I gently laid her on the bed. She spread out like a cat, stretching then curling up into a ball. I quickly walked to my bedroom, and changed out of my soiled pants, went into the bathroom, and grabbed three Ibuprofen from my medicine cabinet. Making my way back into her room. Padding down the hallway, needing to get back to her. She hadn’t moved.
I reached for her and sat her up. “Cariño, you have to take these.”
She half-opened her beautiful eyes and smiled at me. “I really love it… when yoooouuu… call me that… it sounds sooooo sexy… it makessss me all hot and wet… you’re the only man that’sss ever been able to do that…” her head bobbed, struggling to remain upright.
“Lexi—”
“I know… you’re going to be alls… yoooouuu… but you’re not a bad man… mmm hmm… I know yous…” She nodded. “More than you… know you. One day you’re going to… loovvveee me… because… I already think… I’m falling with you... In yous. In love.” Her head stopped moving, and she looked me dead in the eyes for a split second.
I swallowed hard.
She sluggishly smiled. “Night… night… Mr. Martinez.” She laid back, shutting her eyes, and was out within seconds.
I stayed with her for a few minutes, brushing her hair away from her face. Caressing her cheek, taking in all her dainty features. She was so breathtakingly beautiful.
I was fucked.
I sat back in the armchair and rubbed my temples in an effort to calm my migraine to no avail. I watched her sleep like I had every night for the past six months, taking in each and every word she drunkenly just shared with me. Knowing in the back of my mind.
She. Was. Right.
“Oh God,” I groaned in pain, immediately grabbing the pillow, wrapping it around my pounding head. Trying to remember what the hell happened last night.
“Splitting headache? You really shouldn’t be so careless with alcohol,” Martinez chimed in, sitting in his usual spot in the armchair near my bed.
“Mmmm…” I moaned as I rolled over to face him, blinking away the hangover haze. “Maybe y
ou shouldn’t have been an asshole to your guest. Driving me to drink in the first place.”
“Oh, so it’s my fault you decided to drink double your weight in booze?” He stood, walking over to the window.
“I didn’t think I was drinking that much at the time. I don’t usually drink, and now I know why,” I retorted. Squeezing my eyes shut, praying to God to take it easy on me.
“You need to get dressed,” he simply stated, roughly pulling the curtains back. The bright sunlight beamed through the window, causing me to flinch in pain.
“What the hell, Martinez! A little warning please,” I roared, flipping over so I was face down on the bed.
He chuckled, “Close your eyes.”
“Asshole,” I whispered under my breath. “I’d ask you to leave the room, but you’ve already seen me naked,” I replied, feeling the sheets on my unclothed skin.
“And both times you were unconscious. Though, I will give you some credit. You didn’t throw up on me the first time. Lucky me. Don’t worry, sweetheart, I looked but I didn’t touch.”
I sank into the mattress, mortified. Ignoring his statement about looking. “I threw up on you?” Shaking my head, the embarrassment settling in. Making me flush all over.
“And yourself,” he added for good measure.
I couldn’t even look at him, all I wanted was to disappear. Fade into the comforter and pretend like I didn’t make an absolute ass of myself in front of him. In front of his men and thousands of club goers. I fucked up. All I wanted to do was forget about how he snapped last night. One minute he's throwing a man off of me, then we’re dancing and laughing, and the next he's pushing me away again. Acting like a complete fucking dick. I shouldn't have been surprised but it had been months since he treated me that way.
A little part of me thought I had finally broken through his icy demeanor, only realizing it was just another illusion in my delusional head. I had no intention to get wasted, and make a fool out of myself. Which was exactly what I accomplished. I only downed like three, maybe four…or was it five? I lost count.