* * *
Hours had passed—thousands of breaths--since my parents abrupt departure. I still had no idea what they meant—it had to be a long shot, but I tried to hang on to that thread of hope. Jason's mom hadn't left his bedside since Jason's last episode. She'd fallen asleep, but was still clinging to his hand. Beyond my own sorrow—guilt—I felt so sorry for her, she was going to lose her son, the son her entire world revolved around. She would lose everything, her husband, her son, because of me. The door swooshed open and Nurse Greene entered the room.
"Shhh, she's asleep." I whispered.
"Oh," she whispered back. "There's something you should see." She looked down at Jason's mom. "I think she will want to see it too."
"Okay. Mrs. Whitaker," I called softly as Nurse Greene went over to the television. "Mrs. Whitaker?"
She stirred and then opened her eyes. Her gaze immediately found mine. "Jason?"
"No, there's been no change. He's okay."
The television came on and drew her attention away from me as I filled Jason's lungs again.
"There's something I want you to see." Nurse Greene said.
"I don't feel like television." But before Jason's mom could look away, Nurse Greene changed the channel to what looked like a candlelight vigil.
"Is that the school stadium?" I said.
"Yes," Nurse Greene said, "that's the stadium at Boonsboro High School." She looked down at Jason's mom. "Where your son played football. The announcer said most of the town is there. The largest crowd that has ever filled the stadium."
Jason's mom sat up and turned her attention toward the television. "Oh, my, how touching."
"And there's more." Nurse Greene said as she walked across the room and then pulled up the window shade. "Look at the parking lot."
Jason's mom joined her at the window and after a few minutes, waved.
"What is it?" I asked.
"There's another group of people here—all holding candles." Jason's mom said. Her voice—while not happy wasn't as forlorn. "It looks like mostly students. I can see Cathy, Alex and Matt among them."
I filled Jason's lungs again and kissed him. "I love you." I whispered. "The whole community—our friends, are here and at the stadium pulling for you." If Jason could hear me, he would detect the desperation in my voice, but it was impossible to hide. I looked up at the television and wondered if the candles would burn longer than Jason's life. What affect would his death, so pointlessly—so needlessly have on our friends—his teammates. I kissed Jason and filled his lungs with the 11,435th breath. "I love you."
Jason wheezed as he drew in a breath and then a second.
"Jason?"
His eyes fluttered as if he were gaining conscious and in my hands, I could feel a surge of energy. Jason's mom and Nurse Greene were quickly at his bedside. He opened his eyes, looked at his mother and then me. There was so much pain in his eyes. My lips followed his as he tried to speak. "I love—" The heart monitor beep became a steady tone.
"Jason!" his mom cried.
I couldn't find the safe spot this time. Nurse Greene was watching me intently as she steadied Jason's mom. A crash team burst into the room, but she motioned them to stop.
"You can't," she told them, "any motion will sever his spinal cord."
"He's the one they've been talking about." One of them mumbled under her breath.
"Help me." I said to his mom. "Take his hand."
"Please, Jason." she said as she clutched his hand, kissing it over and over.
I looked at Nurse Greene—she obviously saw the desperation in my eyes and turned to the doctors.
"Adrenaline?" she said and then looked back to me.
I nodded.
One of the doctors ran forward with a huge hypodermic, plunged it into Jason's chest and emptied the contents into Jason's heart. There was a beep, and I felt a slight flutter under my fingers. I twisted and pulled just a minute amount and there it was—Jason's heartbeat. The monitor followed with a steady beep, beep, beep...
The doctor pulled out the syringe. "Unbelievable." He walked back to the others. They gathered their gear and left shaking their heads.
"I still don't believe it—and I saw it with my own eyes." The door closed behind them.
Jason's mom scooted her chair closer to the head of the gurney—still holding Jason's hand. Every once in a while, she would brush back my hair as I continued to breath for him. At first I thought it was just so she could see Jason's face better, but the more she did it, the more it seemed like she was also trying to comfort me. She was an amazingly, compassionate woman.
I closed off everything but Jason as his energy continued to fade. I'd wondered about Benjaim and Elizabeth for a little while, but come to the conclusion that they had probably come just for verification. If they'd really gone this time, it would be difficult to end my existence unless Elizabeth wasn't lying about my deterioration. Perhaps I would go, and take Jason with me. Now though, there was nothing but Jason's heartbeat, the breath—my breath rushing in and out of his lungs and my whisper between breaths, "I love you."
Slowly, I became aware of a hand on my shoulder. I'd lost all concept of time, it could have been minutes, hours since I folded my focus inward. I'd even lost count of the number of breaths. What I first noticed, was how weak Jason's heartbeat was and then, despite our closeness—our touch, he was so far away, so cold.
"Izzy."
The voice was soft, gentle, familiar.
"Izzy, can you hear me?"
It was a struggle to open my eyes and even more difficult to lift my head. "Dad?"
"Yes. You've done splendidly, young Jason is still among the living. You've almost completed your part, then, it will be time to let us do ours."
"I won't let you change him." I muttered through a raspy voice.
"I understand. We don't intend to."
"What then?"
Benjamin withdrew a small, ornate, glass vial of golden fluid from his pocket and gently set it on the backboard next to me. When I looked down, I realized Jason's mom wasn't in her chair. I looked toward the glass wall. She was talking with Elizabeth in the hallway. I turned my attention back to Dad.
"What is it?" I asked.
Benjamin leaned closer and spoke softly. "Do you remember the laboratory Jason discovered during your abduction?"
"Yes, you destroyed it."
"That we did, but not before removing a few items."
"Can I assume that that bottle is one of them?"
"Yes."
"Changing Jason into some other kind of monster is no better."
"You know me better than that." He withdrew a leather piece of material about the size of a tissue, but thicker.
"What is that?"
He folded it once, and then rolled it into a cylinder and held it up to my face. "We need to extract some of your venom."
"Why? I've never—"
"Your venom, mixed with the contents of this vile, I believe is the key to saving Jason's life. Your venom will heal his injuries and the liquid from the laboratory will prevent his change."
"But you're not sure?" I could sense the doubt in his voice.
"No."
"This isn't a trick—no, I know you wouldn't do that. What do I have to do?"
"Bite the leather and expel your venom."
"I've never—"
"I realize that, but you must try. The potion won't work without it."
I opened my mouth and Benjamin pressed the leather cylinder between my teeth. I bit down, easily tearing into the leather.
"Think of Jason. How much he means to you. How painful his death will be. Concentrate, feel the anger—the thirst." Benjamin urged.
I bit harder, shaking my head—Jason's heart skipped a beat and then there was a sweet taste in my mouth.
"Open." Benjamin said. He withdrew the shredded leather and wrung it tightly over the bottle.
I breathed another breath into Jason's lungs. When I looked up, three dro
ps of venom dripped into the bottle.
"Excellent." Benjamin said. "You've done well." He stuffed the piece of leather in his pocket and then lifted the vile, swirling it to mix the two liquids. When he was satisfied with the solution, he set the bottle back on the backboard. It was shimmering, almost glowing. "Elizabeth will come in to administer the medication to you."
"To me? I don't understand."
"She will explain everything. This is your choice, Izzy. I can offer no guarantees. He may change, it might kill him in his fragile condition, but it is the best I can do."
"I understand." I filled Jason's lungs with another breath.
"Make your decision quickly, the longer you wait—"
"I got it Dad."
Benjamin kissed my cheek and then smiled—a sad smile it seemed—and turned away. He looked back when he got to the door. "Good luck. You know I support your decision."
"Thank you."
"I love you." He turned, the door swooshed open and he walked out into the hallway with Elizabeth and Jason's mom.
"I don't understand." Jason's mom said.
Benjamin led them down the hall, past the windows, but more importantly beyond my ability to hear what they were saying. I looked down at the elegant glass vial—medicine or poison? There was no way to know.
I knew my family well enough to know Elizabeth would not discuss the choice—or consequences, only the 'administration' as Benjamin called it. Was it worth the risk? Certainly Jason's life was worth the risk, but what if it was poison—he was going to die regardless and my existence would end shortly after—this entire thing was my fault already. Then there was the possibility it would change him. Jason would be a magnificent vampire and we could be together forever—I couldn't do that to him, not even now. I could kill him if he started the change, but I knew I was weak, what if I waited too long—would that really be that bad? The choice was impossible. The door swooshed open.
"How is he?" Elizabeth said from just inside the doorway. Benjamin and Jason's mom were behind her.
I couldn't say it, so I shook my head.
"What is your decision?"
"Now? I have to decide now?"
"Yes, child—dear." She corrected.
"Try." I blurted out. There really was no other choice. I couldn't just let Jason die—not if there was a chance, no matter how remote.
Elizabeth turned toward Benjaim. His expression was so strange, resolute—accepting maybe. He looked past Elizabeth to me, nodded approvingly and then escorted Jason's mom just inside the room. The door swooshed closed behind them as I filled Jason's lungs with another breath.
"I love you." I whispered. "I'd do anything for you."
Elizabeth turned at the sound of my voice. "Then you've made the right choice."
Jason's mom walked toward Jason and I slowly—she looked so frail—so distraught. She stopped next to Elizabeth.
"She is willing to try." Elizabeth said.
Jason's mom looked at me. "I don't understand any of this, but Elizabeth reminded me of my faith—faith in God—faith in you—Jason's life is in your hands like it has been since the day you two met." She looked to Elizabeth and then back to me. "May I?"
"Please."
She walked, feebly to his bedside while I filled Jason's lungs with another breath. "I love you." I whispered and then lifted up further away from Jason than I had been doing so she could see his face.
She leaned down and kissed Jason's cheek, then kissed me on the cheek. "I believe in angels and I've come to believe that that is what you are. I don't understand how, or why, but I will pray. I leave Jason's life in your loving hands." She turned and staggered back toward Benjamin. He met her halfway, supported her and escorted her out of the room.
Elizabeth followed to the door, locked it when she got there, and then pulled the drapes closed. Next, she walked deliberately to the monitoring equipment and somehow seemed to know exactly how to disconnect everything.
"The nurses will be alerted." I said.
"The doctors have agreed to let you have these final hours together, in peace. The only device that will still operate is the button to call the nurse." She walked around behind me as I exhaled another breath into Jason's lungs.
"I love you."
She smiled. "Before we begin, I want you to know how much we—how much I love you. You have meant everything to me."
"You know how much I love you, all of you. Not that it matters, but am I in danger?"
"It matters a great deal, to everyone. As you've said many times, your fate lies with Jason unless you have changed your mind."
"No, whatever we're about to do, that has to be our last chance."
"Very well." Elizabeth picked up the potion Benjamin had left on the backboard. "I'm going to put a few drops of this on your tongue. After I do, you are to breath it into Jason's lungs. Several breaths."
"Okay." I opened my mouth, inhaled deeply and then Elizabeth dripped four drops onto my tongue. I lowered my lips to Jason's and filled his lungs with my breath. "I love you." I filled his lungs with the aromatic potion several more times.
We waited, but nothing happened. I continued with three more breaths, but noticed the aroma had dissipated considerably, leaving a slightly sweet aftertaste.
"Do you know how long it takes the drug to work?" I asked.
"It may not."
I filled Jason's lungs with another breath and this time I felt a surge of warmth from deep within him. "There." I said.
"Something?"
I filled his lungs again and felt his warmth grow. "Yes, he's gaining strength."
"Open your mouth." Elizabeth commanded.
When I did, she poured the remainder of the potion into my mouth.
"Swallow, all of it."
I followed her instructions. The potion was sour, but laced with the same sweet aftertaste as my venom. "What happens now?"
"You're going to sleep—"
"We don't sleep—I can't, if I fall asleep I can't hold Jason's neck."
"It will be gradual. While the potion is rejuvenating your body you must continue to breath for him, as long as you can."
"But—"
"I will help you hold him." Elizabeth slid around behind me and wrapped her arms around me. She covered my hands with hers as I breathed another breath into Jason's lungs. On my next breath, Elizabeth began to hum—an old song it seemed, one a mother might sing to a child. She rocked me rhythmically back and forth between breaths.
Slowly my senses dulled, my mind became cloudy—confused. I struggled to keep my eyes open. "Elizabeth?" I slumped forward.
"Jason is okay, he's breathing on his own now."
"It's working?" I mumbled.
"Yes, it is working."