“I called her.” Jack shrugged off his raincoat and considered the best way to approach this dilemma.
“Did you tell her about the sperm test?” Eric demanded. His son was on his feet now, outrage flashing from his eyes.
“There wasn’t any bread left this morning,” Jack said, “and the hot water was used up and then both towels were wet and—”
“You broke my trust because I ate the last stale piece of bread in the house? Is that what you’re telling me?”
“No…I was hoping that if I reasoned with Shelly, we might clear this up once and for all.”
“If you want me out of here, all you have to do is ask.” Eric stormed into what had once been the spare bedroom.
“I didn’t say I wanted you to move out,” Jack said, but his words held little conviction.
“Not a problem, Dad,” Eric said, rushing out of the room a minute later with his duffel bag. Clothes spilled out from all sides. “I’m out of here. You weren’t much of a father when I needed one as a kid. I don’t know what made me think you’d be any different now.”
Jack groaned in frustration. He’d made a mess of this when all he’d been trying to do was get their lives back to normal. “Eric, listen, I’m sorry.”
“Sorry?” Eric repeated as if this was the most ridiculous comment he’d ever heard. “It’s a little late for that. Don’t worry, I won’t bother you anymore.”
With that, he was gone and Jack wondered how long it would be before he heard from his son again.
Cedar Cove was a wonderful place to be at Christmastime, Maryellen mused as she opened the gallery the first Friday in December. Evergreen boughs were strung along both sides of Harbor Street and large festive candy canes hung from each of the streetlights. The gallery itself was decorated with tiny white lights and elegantly draped swags of spruce that scented the air. It was the smell of Christmas to Maryellen, the smell she associated with childhood holidays—and with her father. She had a sudden sharp memory of him, bringing in a fresh Christmas tree, stamping snow from his feet. Maryellen blinked back unexpected tears.
For some reason, she found herself thinking of Jon. It’d been two weeks since Maryellen had last seen him, but, she suspected it wouldn’t be long before he arrived at the gallery with more of his photographs. Especially since she hadn’t brought them with her when she’d left his house. Maryellen had done her best to prepare emotionally for this next confrontation. She couldn’t allow what had happened to taint their business relationship. A thousand times since that night she’d wanted to kick herself for giving in to her baser instincts. She had plenty of excuses to justify her actions, but time and truth had knocked down every one of them. It wasn’t the wine or the moonlight, nor could she blame Jon for seducing her. She’d been fully involved.
Almost as if Jon was aware that she was thinking of him, he showed up shortly after the gallery officially opened for business. Maryellen was busy with a customer when he came into the large open studio. She noticed that he had two framed photographs with him and guessed there were more in his vehicle.
Maryellen was still waiting on the customer as Jon made a second and then third trip, carrying photographs into the back room.
“I’m going to think it over,” Mrs. Whitfield said.
It took Maryellen a moment to realize the doctor’s wife was referring to the watercolor she’d been considering as a Christmas gift for her husband.
“That’ll be fine,” Maryellen said. Then, with far too little warning, she was alone in the back room of the gallery with Jon.
“Hello,” she said stiffly, doing her best to remain cordial and polite. Before leaving his house, she’d told him their relationship, from that point forward, would be strictly business. She’d meant it.
“Hello.” His eyes probed her with such intensity she looked away.
“It’s a lovely morning, isn’t it?” she murmured.
“The sky’s a dull gray and it’s threatening to rain.”
She smiled weakly. Obviously, small talk wasn’t working, but when had it ever with this man? “I see you’ve brought me a few pictures.”
“These are the ones you left at my house. If you hadn’t been in such a rush—”
“I appreciate your bringing them by,” she said, cutting him off before he could say something else to remind her of that evening.
“I came for another reason,” he said. He tucked his hands in the back pockets of his jeans. His pacing was making her nervous, and then she realized he was nervous, too. He stopped abruptly. “Are you free Sunday afternoon? There’s a dinner train I’ve always wanted to take and I was hoping you’d agree to come as my guest.”
This was exactly what Maryellen had feared was going to happen. She held her breath so long that her lungs began to ache. “Thank you, but no.”
“No?” He sounded hurt and confused.
“I meant what I said earlier. It’s important that our relationship not become personal.”
He frowned. “A little late for that,” he muttered.
She ignored his remark. “I’m not interested in seeing you outside the gallery.” She couldn’t make it any plainer than that.
“You were the one who invited me to the Halloween party.”
“I know, and that was a mistake. The first of several. Listen, Jon, this is all rather embarrassing and awkward, but I’d consider it a favor if you forgot all about what happened.”
His frown darkened. “That’s really what you want?”
“Please.”
It looked as though he was going to argue with her, but then he shook his head. “I don’t have any other choice do I?”
“I know. Again, I’m sorry.”
“Fine, whatever.”
Maryellen wrote him a receipt for the pictures and held it out to him.
An uncomfortable moment passed before he took the slip, turned and walked out of the gallery. As soon as he was gone, Maryellen closed her eyes and released her pent-up tension in the form of a deep sigh. She sagged onto the stool and tried to compose herself.
“Just a minute here,” Jon said, bursting back inside the room. “I don’t do a good job of pretending. Maybe you can forget what happened, but I can’t. Dammit, Maryellen, what we had was good. Surely you can see that?”
“No, I can’t. Please don’t make things any more difficult than they already are.” She should’ve known he wouldn’t be willing to drop this.
“I’m not the one making things difficult—you are. Let’s meet and talk this out. You decide when and where.”
“There’s nothing to discuss.”
“I don’t understand you,” Jon said, pacing again. The old boards creaked beneath his feet as he walked around a gorgeous blue porcelain vase she was getting ready to display. “If you want to pretend it didn’t happen, fine, be my guest, but I can’t. I wish to God I could because I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. About us….”
“Rest assured the matter is out of my mind.”
He snorted at that, recognizing her remark for the lie it was. “If you gave us a chance,” he argued, “you might discover we have something worthwhile here.”
“I doubt it,” she said as blandly as she could, wanting him to assume that this conversation was boring her. “I’m afraid you’ve misread the situation.
He stared at her. “You do this sort of thing on a regular basis?”
She laughed, hoping to sound amused when in reality she felt humiliated and ashamed. “Not in a while…Jon, I’m sorry if you read more into our night together than you should have, but—”
“I know, I know,” he said, and raised his hands to stop her. “I get the picture.”
She sincerely hoped he did.
“Our relationship is strictly business.”
She nodded, forcing herself to smile. It probably looked more like a grimace.
He slowly surveyed the back room of the gallery. “That being the case, I won’t trouble you again.”
br /> “I appreciate that, Jon,” she said gratefully.
“Will you mail me a check once the photographs sell?” he asked.
Maryellen didn’t immediately make the connection. “Mail you a check? You mean you won’t be in again?”
“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” he said starkly.
“Ah…” He had her flustered now. “That’s exactly why I wanted to keep the personal out of this! There’s no need to end our professional relationship, is there? I mean, your pictures are wonderful, really wonderful, and—You will let someone else drop off your work, won’t you?”
The question fell between them and hung there for several tense seconds. While she waited for him to consider her solution, Maryellen clenched her hands behind her back. This wasn’t what she wanted. She was proud to display his photographs. His work brought in customers and paid him well. It was a mutually beneficial relationship. A business relationship.
Jon held her gaze, and in him she saw anger and regret.
“I think it’s time I made arrangements with another gallery,” he said with a shrug that looked anything but casual.
Maryellen bit back words that would ask him to reconsider, that would plead with him to stay. In a small voice she managed, “If this is what you prefer, then I can only wish you the best.”
“It isn’t what I’d prefer,” he told her flatly. “It’s what you want. Goodbye, Maryellen.”
A thickness formed in her throat as Jon turned and for the second time started to leave. “Oh, hell,” he muttered, turning back. He walked quickly toward her. “Don’t worry,” he said, taking her by the shoulders. “Like I said, I don’t plan to bother you again, but I would like one last memory before I go.”
“What?” she asked, her voice trembling, reacting to the shock of his touch.
“This,” he said hoarsely. Then he kissed her as if it was the only thing that had been on his mind from the moment she’d dashed out of his home. His kiss was hard and hot and unbearably slow. By the time he tore his mouth from hers, the blood was pounding in her ears.
Maryellen tried to prevent herself from giving him the satisfaction of a response, but when he released her, she staggered back two steps and gasped for air. Her hand went to her throat in an instinctive reaction.
Muttering something she couldn’t quite hear, Jon left and this time she knew it was for good. Her legs were unsteady and Maryellen felt close to tears. Making her way to the coffeepot, she poured herself a cup and was shocked by how badly her hand trembled as she filled the mug.
He’d kissed her like that because he wanted her to remember him. To remember the night they’d spent together. His ploy had worked far too well. Maryellen shut her eyes, and their slow, seductive lovemaking played back in her mind. She recalled how he’d touched her, the feel of his strong, masculine hands as he’d explored her body, caressing her first with his fingers and then his tongue. She remembered in vivid detail the sensations she’d experienced as he made love to her. She’d wanted him with a passion that was difficult to renounce.
She hadn’t set out to hurt Jon, but she could see that she had. In the process she was hurting herself, too. Jon didn’t understand why she’d rejected him. He didn’t know, and he never would. She’d sent him away for a reason that lay buried deep inside her.
She’d walked this path once before and still bore the scars. Sometimes emotional wounds were harder to heal than physical ones. Sometimes they never healed at all.
Strings of Christmas tree lights were spread out on the living room floor when Zach woke on Saturday morning.
“Hi, Dad,” Eddie said when Zach looked in, yawning, on his way to the kitchen. His son sat amid the lights, straightening them and draping the long cords along the back of the sofa.
“What are you doing with those?” he asked. Rosie liked having the outside of the house decorated with Christmas lights, but he’d always found it a nuisance. He glanced at the clock and saw it was barely seven. Apparently Rosie was already up.
“Mom got them out,” Eddie explained, and stuck the plug into an outlet. Lights instantly blazed, nearly blinding Zach.
He suspected this was his wife’s less-than-subtle hint that she wanted him to string up the lights this morning. Great, just great. She might’ve mentioned it earlier, but then they weren’t on the best of terms these days. Remaining civil during the Christmas holidays was going to be difficult if Thanksgiving was any indication. Somehow they’d made it through the day without a major blowup—probably because Rosie had spent most of the afternoon in the kitchen with her sister, no doubt complaining about him.
“Where’s your mother?” he asked irritably.
“She’s gone.”
“Gone?” Zach checked the time again. “Where is she now?”
“Christmas Bazaar at the high school.”
“What’s she doing there?”
Eddie shrugged. “She didn’t tell me. Can we go to McDonald’s for breakfast? I’m getting tired of Pop-Tarts.”
Zach stared at his son. This nine-year-old kid actually believed the alternative to Pop-Tarts was a meal outside the home. Rosie had gotten so lax in carrying out her responsibilities as a full-time wife and mother that their children didn’t even know that most families ate meals together around a table.
“Dad?”
Eddie’s urgent cry cut into his thoughts. “Look!” He pointed to the television. “That’s what I want for Christmas.”
Zach studied the screen and watched some remote-controlled monster truck propel itself over a huge dirt mound with a deafening roar.
“Mom said I could have it.”
“She did, did she?” Zach would talk to Rose about that. He wasn’t forking over a couple of hundred bucks for a stupid toy. Wandering into the kitchen, he discovered that the coffee wasn’t on but his wife had taken a moment to jot him a note, which she’d propped up next to the automatic drip pot.
Working until four at the Bazaar. Put up the outside lights, okay? Allison’s at a slumber party and will need a ride home. If you have a chance, would you buy the Christmas tree? See you later.
Rosie
His wife had forgotten to mention she’d be working at the bazaar. That was predictable enough. But he’d hoped that for once they’d have a day together without obligations or demands. It used to be that buying the Christmas tree was a family event; they’d go to the lot together and everyone had a say. Decorating it was fun, with music playing in the background and popcorn popping and hot cider. These days, getting and trimming the tree was an afterthought, a nuisance that had to be fitted into the cracks in Rosie’s overbooked schedule.
“Can we go to McDonald’s for breakfast?” Eddie asked a second time.
Zach didn’t answer him.
“Dad?”
“Sure,” he muttered, noting that there wasn’t any milk in the refrigerator. Not only had Rosie left him with a to-do list, but the house was devoid of groceries.
Zach was furious all morning about his wife’s lack of attentiveness when it came to her family. He remembered what Janice Lamond had told him about the special Saturday she’d planned for her son. She was clearly the type of mother who made her child a priority.
After breakfast at McDonald’s, Zach collected Allison from her friend’s place, and then, with Eddie’s help, tackled putting up the Christmas lights.
“Are we going to buy our tree today?” Eddie asked while Zach stood on the ladder and attached the lights along the roofline of the house. He gazed down on his son, who was looking anxiously up at him.
“Ask your sister if she wants to come,” Zach called.
“Okay.” Eddie raced into the house. He wasn’t gone more than fifteen seconds. “Allison said she’ll come if she has to. We don’t need her, do we, Dad?”
“Tell her we need her.”
Eddie stared up at him, his face a picture of disbelief and disgust. Zach couldn’t keep from laughing. With a twinge of regret he realized it was the f
irst time he’d smiled all day. It wasn’t his children’s fault that Rosie chose to spend her day with strangers rather than her own family. Once she was home, Zach intended to have a very long talk with his wife.
Buying the Christmas tree proved to be one more annoying episode in a day that had started off badly and quickly gotten worse. By the time they returned to the house, the kids were bickering and hungry. When Zach pulled into the garage, he saw that Rosie’s car was there.
“We got the tree, Mom,” Eddie announced as he rushed into the kitchen.
“Hi,” Zach said, determined to put on a happy front until he had a private moment with his wife. “How was your day?”
Rosie sat on the sofa with her feet up. “I’m exhausted. How did everything go at home?”
“Great,” Eddie said. “Dad and I got the Christmas lights up. We went out to breakfast at McDonald’s and then we stopped at the store and bought milk.”
“You got groceries?” Rosie asked, a look of relief in her eyes.
“Just milk and bread.” Again it was Eddie who answered. “Dad thought we should make tomato soup and toasted cheese sandwiches for lunch, and we needed stuff for that.”
“It sounds like you guys had a nice day.”
“Are we going to decorate the tree tonight?” Allison asked, her expression bored.
“Sure,” Zach said.
“Not tonight, sweetheart,” Rosie answered simultaneously.
Allison glanced from Zach to Rosie.
“I’ve just spent nine hours on my feet,” Rosie said. “The last thing I want to do now is decorate a tree. We can do it tomorrow after church.”
“I can’t,” Allison complained. “The French Club is having their bake sale in the mall, remember?”
“Oh, right.” Rosie rubbed a hand over her eyes. “I’m not supposed to help with that, am I?”
“Yes, Mom…” Their daughter sounded both hurt and provoked.
“Okay, okay.”
“What about dinner?” Zach asked.
They’d already had pizza once that week and KFC another night. Zach realized this was an especially busy time of year, but it seemed important that they have at least one meal a week as a family.