The news spread through the town like wild fire. Jed Conner had been accused of killing Pastor Brown and running a still. Many in town knew about the illegal whiskey. They had bought it from him themselves, but killing the minister? Why do it? People shook their heads, saying what a waste it was.
When the news reached Franklin Conner, he couldn’t believe it.
“Confessed! What do you mean he’s confessed?” Reaching for his phone, Franklin immediately called his attorney, demanding that he rush over to the jail and see that his boy got the best defense possible.
What are people going to think?
Later that day his lawyer notified him that Jed had refused to see him and had accepted a court appointed attorney instead.
“There’s nothing I can do for him, Franklin. He has to agree to my representing him. And he’s refused twice, so far.”
“I’ll take care of it. Wait for my call,” the prominent man stated as he hung up and drove over to the county jail.
When he was able to talk to his son, through a reinforced glass wall, he demanded, “What’s the idea Jed? To refuse an experienced lawyer, for one appointed by the court is stupid! Are you crazy? They’ll throw the book at you. What made you confess? I want you to see my lawyer right now. I’ll take care of the cost.”
Jed exploded, “Now you’re willing to pay for it, when it’s too late!” he yelled, standing in anger as his chair fell over.
The guard warned Jed to behave. Jed picked up his chair and sat down heavily, pouting, scared and mad.
He continued, not looking at his dad, “I don’t want anything from you! Nothing! Where were you when I needed you years ago? When we were struggling? I needed help then, so I wouldn’t end up here, like this… now!”
Franklin was visibly shaken. “How can you blame me for this? Are you telling me that my refusal to loan you money, so you’d have to stand on your own feet and be a man, is the cause of all this?”
“Yeah, I’m a man now. And I’ll take my punishment like a man, but without you! How can you sit there and tell me it all was for my own good. It wasn’t! We couldn’t make our bills, we couldn’t eat, the children needed clothes. What did you expect me to do? I told you we needed to sell everything and find a job in the city. But, no… you insisted we stay here, helping you with the mill, or the lodge. It was all for you and nothing for us! All my life you’ve told me how to live, according to your rules. But, did you ever think about us, even once? Did you ever love any of us? Have you ever loved me, Dad?”
“What are you talking about? Of course I love you,” he answered, confused.
Why should I have to say it? He should know how I feel, without having to say it! he thought angrily.
“You never showed your love. You never said it, and you certainly never helped when it was important. I’ve been on my own since Mom died. You were always too busy for any of us. The only time I had you in my life was at church, and that was with your righteous, pious attitude… always telling someone what to do. When did you ever show any of us that you loved us?”
“I’ve provided for you boys and your mother,” he stated, becoming uncomfortable.
“Everything you ever did was for yourself. You’re cold, Dad… ice cold. There was never any love in anything you did. None! Pastor Brown had more love, more compassion, and kindness in his little finger, than you ever will in your entire body. He was merciful, kind, patient and forgiving. When were you ever anything like that? Give me one example, just one.”
Franklin remained silent, trying to think.
“You’re such a hypocrite! You believe yourself to be a righteous man of God, yet when a good, kind man stands up to you, you persecute him. The only thing he ever did wrong was not to agree with you. What a sin!”
Franklin was crushed by his son’s tirade.
“I’m done. You’ve got nothing I want. This conversation is over and I don’t want to see or hear from you again.”
“You don’t mean that Jed?”
Jed got up and walked out of the room, never looking back or talking with his father again.
The bond of love wasn’t there to bridge the abyss that existed between them.
Franklin had lost his son, in bitterness and pain. He was shaken by the experience and walked out of the jail trying to think, wondering if he had indeed been wrong.
* * * *