I decided to avoid the conflict and head out without a goodbye. My mother has constant stress. She’s an accountant, and I swear it has been at least ten years since I’ve heard her say anything positive about her job. What I never understood was why she dedicated her life to something she hated. Every morning she would get up, put on the same boring black office outfit and pour herself a cup of coffee. She always had bags under her eyes that she tried to cover with makeup. I’d never tell her the makeup made it even worse. She was a dedicated type of person, the type you know you could always count on. Even at the last minute. Naturally, I looked up to her. She worked harder than any other person I’d met but I’d never end up like her. I was more of a dream chaser. I knew no matter where my life would take me, I just wanted to be happy.
I walked outside to see my car had been either moved from the side of the street or to the terrifying thought that my sister took it the night before. I walked over and opened the garage before jumping to any conclusions. No car to be found. I shut the garage and walked with anger back to my front door the way a three year old would act when their mother took away their favorite toy. “MOM! Olivia took my car again!” I yelled. She didn't respond. What the hell, I thought, has my mom suddenly gone deaf? “Whatever, I'm taking yours then,” I snarled.
As I walked over to the counter to grab my mom's keys the TV caught my eye and I stopped dead in my tracks. My body went numb, my knees were weakening by the second. All I saw was my car in ruins on the side of the busiest highway in town.
“Olivia's dead” was all that was running through my mind. I ran upstairs to grab my mom but my hand went right through her as if it were thin air. I'm dreaming, I have to be dreaming. What is happening to me? Just as I went to grab for her the second time the phone rang and she answered immediately. She fell to her knees, “This can't be true,” she sobbed into the phone. I tried to embrace her but just as the first time I went straight through her body.
I sat on my mother's bed watching as she grabbed a handful of things from her dresser and shoved them in a bag. The next few minutes went by in a blur. I felt as if my life was moving in slow motion, I tried to calculate every move my mother was making but my eyes became heavy. I felt like I hadn’t slept in weeks, like I had just finished reading the longest, most boring book imaginable. My head wouldn’t stop spinning, I closed my eyes to try and gain some sense of balance. Am I a ghost, I thought to myself. This is the worst nightmare I have ever had.
“Emma” is all I heard.
I opened my eyes in panic and jumped to my feet. “Who the hell are you?” I said to the boy that finally woke me from my horrible nightmare.
“I’m Jake” he said, slowly standing to his feet. He had piercing blue eyes, the kind you would pick out in a crowd. His sandy blonde hair was cut just above his eyebrows and his lips curled under like he hadn’t had a drink of water in ages.
“How do you know me? Where’s my mother? How did you get in here?” I said barely taking a breath between each question.
“Before I explain to you why I’m here I think you should sit.” Is all he said back. Without questioning I sat down next to him. I had never met this guy and somehow I felt an undying need to listen to him. “You are the chosen one, Emma.”
“The chosen one, what does that even mean?” I said getting a little annoyed.
He stood up, walked over to the window and put his head down. “You didn’t chose this life, none of us did. Your life as you know it is about to change drastically,” he said, finally turning towards me. “The car accident you were in last night, it left you in critical condition.”
I then remembered what I thought had been my dream. The car I saw on the news, my car, I had been driving it. “None of this is making sense,” I said to him still trying to pinpoint the last thing I remembered from the night before. “Follow me.” Is all he said in reply.
He took me to the hospital where I saw my mother’s car outside parked next to my father’s truck. He lead me inside where I finally saw my parents, I wanted so badly to run up to them. I wanted to hug them and ask what was going on. I knew better, I knew I wasn’t a human anymore.
I examined the looks on my parents’ faces. My mother had been crying, her dark mascara dried on her rosy cheeks. My father was fiddling with his thumbs. I could tell he was nervous by his constant movement. “They can’t see you,” Jake said to me as he walked over to the front desk. Tears began to form in my eyes. I was unsure if I was more scared or pissed off at the fact that my life was in pure confusion.
I smoothed out the nonexistent wrinkles in my favorite sweater and turned away from Jake. “Emma,” he said, in a soothing voice. “It will all make sense soon.”
Make sense? How was this supposed to make sense. If this is what death is like, it is a hundred times more horrid than I ever imagined.
I watched Jake as he watched me. We stood in silence for what felt like an eternity until he finally spoke again. “I’ve never had to tell someone their meaning in life, I just found out mine five months ago,” he said matter-of-factly. “Mine was much different. I’d suffered from depression for as long as I could remember. It all got too much to bare and I took my own life. It went slow, and I was in pain before I felt relief. Peter is my mentor like I am for you. He came to me in what I thought was my sleep much like I came to you. It took me days to wrap my head around why I, Jake, a guy who couldn’t even save his own life would be much like an angel for other people.”
An angel, I thought to myself; so this is heaven. I am in heaven, and heaven wasn’t as great as I’d hoped for. “Emma, please listen to me.” He said breaking my thoughts, he must have noticed how distant my eyes were from his. “You have a choice, one I never got. Although I would have picked this life over mine any day, you have a family that loves you and a future ahead of you. I was assigned to you a month after my death and I’ve been watching you ever since. You aren’t dead, Emma.” He took a long breath before continuing. “You have a choice to make. You are strong enough to keep fighting and heal yourself or you can join me.” he finished. What the hell did he mean join him? Join him doing what?
A part of me still felt like this was dream. I hoped it was. “We angels were born with a specific purpose in life. You know that saying about the devil and angel on your shoulder? Well, turns out that’s actually real. I was assigned to be an angel, I alter thoughts in criminals. I change their decisions.” He got serious, his eyes narrowing in on mine as if he was trying to read my mind. “I know this might not be making a lot of sense to you, but you were born with a gift.” he said.
Yeah, no shit it wasn’t making sense. I was an average girl, I tried hard in school to make something of myself. I wasn’t born with a gift. It wasn’t fair that this could all be taken from me. This isn’t a blessing at all. “Let me show you.” he said, and we were off.
I wasn’t sure where I was. From the looks and sounds of it, it seemed like I was in a large city, much like New York. There were people hustling about, like I look in the morning running late for school. Some hailing taxis others speaking on their phones. “Follow me,” Jake said. I walked a few steps behind him, still people watching. He took me to a dark ally. Even if people couldn’t see me, I’d never go in here alone. He walked over to a man in dark clothing.
“Can he see us?” I muttered to Jake.
“No,” he replied.
I watched closely as Jake narrowed his eyes just like he did to me earlier. If the man could see us he made no signs of it. Although nothing was happening but Jake’s eyes being fixated on this unknown person I couldn’t stop watching him. A few seconds later Jake took his eyes off the man. The man then put his arm into his dark jacket and pulled out a gun. With no thought I immediately stepped back from him. The man walked to the end of the ally and dumped the gun into a dumpster.
“Do you understand now?” Jake said, still watching the man. “I won’t tell you what he was thinking, it’s too disturb
ing,” he said. “But I stopped it. That is my gift, this is your gift.”
“So you are trying to tell me that I have the ability to change the thoughts of random creepy dudes in big leather jackets?” I asked. It came out more sarcastic than I wanted. “You’ve watched one too many CSI shows,” I said, still sarcastic.
I knew by the way his jaw clenched that I shouldn’t of tried to joke with him. “You’re not ready,” he said. “You may never be.”
Maybe I wasn’t taking this as seriously as I should have been. I suddenly knew this wasn’t a dream like I’d hoped, this was my destiny. “I’m sorry, Jake,” I said, as if we had been friends for years and I hurt his feelings. “I’m not sure how to take all of this in, I don’t know why I would ever be chosen to do something like this.”
“None of us know exactly Emma, but the reality of it is that you have been. We out of the billions of people in the world have been chosen to help. To save people’s lives, to be much like super heroes,” he said with a smile on his face. I laughed at the thought and so did he. “Emma.” I looked up at his face. “You don’t have to have this life, you can go back to your old life.” and suddenly I wasn’t sure if that’s what I wanted anymore.
Twins
by Derek Wettstein
Alone, now and forever
Not by choice; one of two
To reunite above the clouds
To meet the other shoe
Socks come in twos
Salt and pepper a pair
They carry the same code
Yet one no longer there
A while has passed
The days go by
Still a longing remains
For the one in the sky
His absence not strange
For he never came to be
But family he is
We shall always decree
Of each other they never knew
A tragedy pre-birth
Surprised to find another
Brought abundant mirth
It’s hard now to imagine
Another one of him
How would life be today
Had we the other twin
I once was blind
by Derek Wettstein
The desert scorches all who pass through
To this boy that fact was nothing brand new
All of his life he lived in this place
Though solemn and broken, a smile on his face
His home was uncared for; by the holes in the roof,
No money to help it and much other proof
Streets made of sand, coarse, tough and dirty
Buildings and houses were far, far from sturdy
The economy was foreign for men to find work
At night it was spooky, for criminals lurk
The government harsh, not a word spoke against it
For surely your deeds would reap the death sentence
Sorrow and gloom seemed to pester the town
Yet no one carried a grudge or a frown
Happy to live and thankful for family
Trying their best to avoid all calamity
Though things were rough, the boy always tried
To be grateful for all despite his poor eyes
The colors of the desert, red, orange and yellow
Faded in sight, making him mellow
His mother had taught him to read and to write
But further away he struggled with sight
His eyes had failed him he thought to himself
For I can’t even glimpse at what’s on top of that shelf
Then one day a new man came into the city
Young and fat and way over giddy
The boy had passed by him that day in the street
Squinting he looked and tried to perceive
This troubled the man that the boy could not see
So he bought some materials to set this boy free
Late into the night he worked on a present
One he would give to that boy in the desert
The sun had come up, offering vision
The man now awakened, time for his mission
The trouble was now to find the boy again
Perhaps he could find and ask one of his friends
‘Twas lateday by now that the man had been searching
Up every street, by now he was lurching
Alas he had found him under a tree
Wishing so badly for the sunset to see
Hello my young boy, said the man to the lad
I have something for you; I hope you’ll be glad
From behind his body he brought out the donation
Wrapped in newspapers, those of the small nation
Excited to open this strange, precious gift
He tore into the package ever so swift
A new piece of eyewear for the boy to display
An act of kindness that went a long way
The boy was ecstatic and shouted with glee
Thank you, oh, thank you, for now I can see
The sunset is beautiful, its colors so vivid
I’ve longed for a while to see every image
But why have you done this special deed for but me
I love you my brother, and now you are free
AUTUMN
BY DEREK WETTSTEIN
Warm
October
November
The rain falls from the sky
A cold breeze brushes past
A chill runs up my spine
The leaves crunch under my feet
The colorful array lines the horizon
Soon to be a dismal sight
Dormant and brown for the foreseeable future
I shuffle past the orange holiday gourds
And open the door to enter my home
An aroma fills my nose, pumpkin spice and cinnamon
A scent wafts through the air
A delicious apple pie rests upon the counter
Turkey and
Stuffing
Thankfulness
Leaves fall
Colors fade
Cold creeps in
Winter is nigh
The seasons they change and time passes by; to cherish the moment is ever so wise.
Wind Whipped
by Derek Wettstein
The sun had just come up,
Peeking over the fields
The white, puffy clouds were dispersed abroad
Like are the sheep of a rich, green pasture
All had seemed to be perfectly normal
Except an overwhelming eerie feeling
Today was going to be different
Claps and flashes off to the west
Get louder and closer
Sirens blare out, piercing the stillness
Underground we hid
Trains
Clasped hands, white knuckles, heads tucked between knees
Only seconds
Life changing seconds
Silence
Emergence
Wailing. Pieces. Lives. Gone. Never the same. Forever. We will be okay. Stronger.
“the great liberation”
by judas white
In the year 2040 the United States voted in a conservative majority. This conservative revolution fueled one of the biggest events in American history. Being liberal in any sense was outlawed. All social welfare programs were taken and scrapped. There was massive persecution of anyone even suspected of holding liberal values. During this movement called “The great liberation” all people suspected of holding any meetings promoting liberal values were convicted of treason, held without a trial and most of them were sent to reeducation camps to instill conservative values in their minds. This is a story of some survivors of the great liberation and their experiences while being held in the Ronald Reagan Liberty Camp (RRLC).
Jeff and Suzanne were heads of a local chapter of the ACLI in Minnesota
for just a few years before the liberation. They had tried to run north to Canada to escape the persecution, but they were stopped just one hundred yards from the border and brought to the RRLC. Jeff had not seen Suzanne since that day as men and women were separated and had their own sides of the camp. When Jeff was brought into the camp he quickly became a leader in the resistance group that started to form. Many members of the resistance had been taken away to solitary confinement. When they returned from the solitary they were never the same they had been changed and barely distinguishable from the captors that held them. No one knew what was actually happening in the solitary section and everyone was afraid of what might await them inside.
Jeff and I were a couple of the exceptions to the rule. We were secure in our convictions to fight our oppressors at any cost. As a union leader in Chicago I was near the top of the list of people to incarcerate. Due to an inside source in Washington D.C. I knew that the Liberation was coming and took great care to get most of my family to Canada before the borders were officially closed. I sent my wife and my son to a sympathizer group in Toronto where I knew that they would be safe. I received word that they were safe and sound and sat and waited to be taken away, as to stand in solidarity with my workers. In two days’ time they came for me. They burst into my office while I was burning incriminating documents and lists of members in my offices fireplace to protect my members, if only for a little while.
“Mr. White, Department of Homeland Purity, open the door now, we will not ask you a second time” yelled an officer on the outside of the door. “We have a warrant.” Then I heard a man say “do it” and my mahogany door was splintered and men in black military garb burst in to my office and held me at gunpoint.