My heart is beating so wildly I wonder if I’ll pass out.
The decisions we make define who we are. I chose to live at home while attending college because my mother needed help with my brother. I was a virgin until my senior year because I couldn’t risk an added responsibility. Later when I moved out, I kept my expenses low so I could support Joe in a way I wished someone had been able to with me. I don’t regret any of those decisions. I’m proud of who my brother is. He’s grateful for all I’ve done. When I got hurt he took out loans to take the weight of his tuition from me.
I live a practical, sensible life—one without risk or wild dreams. When I marry, and I hope I do one day, it will probably be to a regular, steady, man with a big heart and an easy laugh. He’ll be the type other women might overlook because he doesn’t drive the right car or wear the right clothes. He won’t mind when the dog or the kids crawl into bed with us. That’s the man I see spending the rest of my life with.
Barrett? He’d be a fling. A fuck. An impulsive indulgence. Just because I’ve never given in to one before doesn’t mean I would judge a woman for it.
This isn’t about other women. It’s not about who he was with yesterday or who he’ll be with tomorrow. It’s about me and how I will or won’t feel about myself afterward.
I let myself be solely in the moment. Pleasure for the sake of pleasure. I’ve been feeling down on myself lately. This could be exactly what I need to get my mojo back.
“I need a shower,” I say huskily. I toss my purse on the chair next to the door.
“I’d love to help you with that.”
I nod.
He closes and locks the door behind him.
I can barely breathe as he walks toward me. I struggle to find something to say, but it’s wasted effort. He swings me up in his arms. I sigh from the sheer pleasure of being carried as if I weigh nothing. I cling to his shoulders. He’s all male and all mine—at least for the moment.
In the bathroom he lowers me back onto my feet and leans into the double shower to turn it on. In a heartbeat he’s back with me, cupping my face and kissing me with the same hungry passion as the night before.
This time there is no holding back. I slide my hands under his shirt to explore his taut chest. He pulls my shirt over my head, releases and drops my bra, then tosses his own shirt aside.
Skin to skin—heaven.
Between mind-melting kisses, we step out of the rest of our clothing. Freed from our constraints, we explore each other greedily. The more I touch, the more I want to. His mouth leaves mine and travels down my neck. Remembering the magic of his touch, I arch to offer him more. It’s everything it was and better.
His touch is rough, but the kind of rough I’ve always dreamed of. In his arms, I feel feminine and free. Powerful and powerless at the same time. He teases my breasts until I’m wild against him, then he picks me up and sets me on the bathroom counter.
I’m shaking with need and anticipation. He pushes my legs apart and pulls me to the very edge. I dig my hands into his hair as he kisses his way between my breasts, down my stomach, to my sex.
I like oral sex, but what he’s doing is a whole new level of expertise. He slides two fingers into me, curves them to stimulate what the men before him have missed. His tongue flicks across my clit while he pumps his fingers in and out. Slow at first, then deeper and faster. I moan from the pleasure of each thrust. Heat rises within me. I tighten my hold on his hair. Just as I am about to peak, he replaces his fingers with his tongue and uses his thumb to work my clit into a frenzy. There’s no holding back. I come with a cry and an all-over body shudder.
Steam from the shower warms the air. Barrett kisses his way down one of my legs to my ankle then back up. The heat from his breath is a caress on my throbbing sex. He begins to head down my other leg and I tense. No, I don’t want him near my scars. I want this moment to remain perfect.
“Relax,” he murmurs. “Every inch of you is beautiful.” He kisses the inside of my ankle then turns it, running his fingers gently over the white line of my scar. “How did you hurt yourself?”
It’s impossible to feel anything but young and sexy with him looking at me from between my legs. “Shark attack,” I joke.
He smiles but raises an eyebrow.
“I slipped on ice,” I confess. “I’m not that exciting.”
“I disagree,” he growls in that voice that tells me he means it. He stands and his huge, fully erect cock proudly waves between us. He holds out a hand to me. I place mine in his and slide off the counter.
He digs into the pocket of his shorts, pulls out a wallet then a condom, slides it on, and leads me into the shower.
Beneath the hot spray of water we give ourselves over to our desires again. His kiss is hotter and more demanding. I open my mouth wider for him, rub myself against him. He lifts me, backs me against the shower wall and thrusts up into me. I wrap my legs around his waist, cling to his shoulders, and gasp into his mouth as he thrusts deeper. So big. So strong. His hands cup by bare ass, holding me while he pounds into me. It’s a powerful, mindless mating, unlike anything I’ve experienced.
Nothing exists beyond him and how good he feels inside me, all around me. If I could, I would stay in this moment forever, but I already feel my body tightening and warming for another orgasm. His thrusts come faster and harder. He lifts his head to look me in the eye while we both climax.
We come back to earth slowly, still intimately connected. I smile and touch his face. Do you thank someone after something like this?
He frowns, which only makes me smile more. He can’t possibly be miserable right now.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
He lowers me to my feet and withdraws. After tossing the condom to one side, he runs his hands up and down my arms. “I meant to be gentle. Your leg—”
I go up onto my tiptoes and kiss those stern lips of his. “Is fine. I’m fine. This is better than physical therapy.”
A slow grin spreads across his face. “I would hope so.” He picks up the bar of soap and begins to wash my arms before soaping my breasts and lower. I close my eyes at the pleasure of it. He turns me, soaps my back, my ass cheeks, then runs a hand between them in a caress that has me gasping. He kisses my neck, and I feel his cock hardening against my back.
I turn, take the soap and begin to wash him. He fills my hands, and I pump him back to fullness.
“I don’t have another condom,” he says in a strangled voice.
Emboldened by the strength of my need for him, I push him back against the shower wall, drop to my knees and say, “We don’t need one.”
CHAPTER SEVEN
Barrett
I was wrong. I thought when this moment came, when I found myself in Audrey’s bed, naked with her cuddled to my side—I thought I would be filled with regret. Being with her felt too fucking good to think about anything beyond doing it again.
She fell asleep a few minutes ago. Her hair is still damp, her face devoid of all makeup, but she is easily the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I told Paul I would meet him and the other men for brunch, but they know better than to come looking for me. I’m single and this is exactly how they’d expect to find me, although not with whom I’ve chosen.
I swore I wouldn’t take it this far. When I told Todd to arrange for a medically trained massage therapist for Audrey, I felt uncharacteristically noble. I’d spent enough of the night wishing I’d handled everything better. Audrey is obviously coming out of a traumatic experience. I told myself the last thing she needed was to be mauled by the best man at her best friend’s wedding.
When I saw her at her door, I had simply intended to apologize for the night before. All that had left my thoughts, though, as soon as our eyes met. The air had sizzled, and I’d been lost to whatever the fuck this is.
Lust is nothing new to me. By thirty, I thought I had experienced it all. I hadn’t experienced this.
I’m not a romantic man. I don’t tend to s
tay the night with my partners. I don’t hold them to me like I can’t bear to let them go. I certainly never thought I could feel this way about a woman I hardly know.
I’m assuming my brain will return as soon as I put some distance between the two of us. I was honest about what I can offer her. Today. Maybe tomorrow. That’s it.
I shouldn’t have asked Todd to find out where she’s from. I wish she weren’t also from Massachusetts. I don’t date. This will work out better for both of us if it comes to the same abrupt end as our trip here does.
She snuggles closer to my side, and I run a hand through her blonde curls. I wonder if she has a boyfriend back home and the thought burns through me. I wasn’t her first. I won’t be her last.
My stomach clenches—I hate the idea of her with anyone else.
Her eyes flutter open. She smooths a hand over one side of my face. “What are thinking about?”
“You,” I answer without thinking.
She gives me a funny look. “I haven’t been with many men, but usually they look happier afterward.”
“This is me happy.” An image of her going down on another man has me rolling her beneath me. Her legs part naturally and my cock twitches against her parted sex. If I had protection with me I’d already be inside her again. Instead I enjoy the wet feel of her against the length of my shaft.
She gasps, then frames my face with her hands. “I’m happy too.”
“Are you on the pill?”
“No. I haven’t had sex in so long it really wasn’t worth it. My last boyfriend—”
I place a finger over her mouth to silence her. I don’t want to hear about the last man she was with. Holy fuck, would the front desk deliver condoms? A family pack?
I can’t do that. We’d never make the wedding and our absence would definitely be noticed.
I roll off her and sit up. “It’s twelve thirty. Do you have somewhere you need to be?”
She sits straight up, her glorious bare tits jiggling as she does. “Oh, my God, is it that late? I’m supposed to meet Isa at her room. I can’t believe I slept.”
She looks so flustered. It’s adorable. “I can.”
She stops mid-scramble to get off the bed. “You’re smiling.”
I am. “I do know how.”
She stands. I love that she doesn’t cover herself. I’ve kissed every inch of her intimately, but it’s a joy to gaze upon her as well. She blushes beneath my attention but stands just as proudly before me. “You’re very handsome when you do. You should try it more often.”
“So I’m hideous like this?” I scowl at her in jest.
She shakes her head and rolls her eyes. “I’ve fed your ego enough.”
I stand and close the distance between us. “This was fucking amazing, Anna.” Her mouth rounds with surprise and I realize what I did. Fuck, I know her name. I don’t know an Anna, not one that matters. Why would I say something that fucking stupid? “Audrey.”
I tense and wait for the tears.
She puts a hand on her hip and says, “It really was, Carl.” Then, unbelievably, she smiles. “Or Kevin. Wait, it’ll come back to me. Kurt?” She takes me completely by surprise and laughs. “You should see your face.”
I pull her into my arms and swing her around then settle her against me. “I’m an ass.”
Her expression sobers. “No, you’re a stranger, but you’re right, it was amazing. Thanks, Kyle.”
I slap her bare ass lightly. “I deserve that.”
She is still smiling. “Yes, you do.” She checks the clock. “Shit, I really need to get dressed. Could you—you know—leave?”
“Absolutely.” I step back and instantly feel the loss.
I’m dressed before her. I’m tempted to kiss her one more time before I go, but I don’t think I’ll make it out the door if I do. Instead, I say, “Audrey, I’ll be waiting for you at the altar.”
She looks at me weird and nods.
I leave, kicking myself. Of all the things I could have said—really? I made it sound as if—as if this meant more to me than it did. It’s a good thing Audrey is only in my life temporarily. I’m dumb as fuck around her.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Audrey
As I rush to dress, I’m a jumble of emotions. I brush out my hair, wetting the parts of it that look like I slept on them wet because I did. I just had the most incredible few hours—that ended with him calling me the wrong name. I knew going into it that it was a mid-morning version of a one-night stand. Pleasure for the sake of pleasure. I refuse to beat myself up over it.
It was good. He was good. I feel great.
I don’t do things like this—ever. I’m allowed a walk on the wild side. He laid out his expectations from the encounter and more than delivered. I accepted the conditions, so I’d be a fool if I invested any emotion into it.
Sex for the sake of sex. I didn’t think I was capable of it.
It should have paled in comparison to the sex I’ve had with the two men I genuinely cared about before.
Sex with someone I know nothing about should have been disappointing, but it wasn’t.
I’m modifying the description of the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. He has to know how to rock my world in bed. I can’t go back to good enough after this. That’s what I intend to take away from sleeping with Barrett—sex can be better than I thought.
I grab my dress from the closet and leave my room at five till one. Lia opens the door at my knock. “Did you get sun?” she asks.
My cheeks are warm to my touch. “Oh, no. I fell asleep then rushed to get here on time.”
“I almost did the same but Zeke came back early and—I wasn’t sure I’d be here on time.”
I smile because I completely understand that feeling.
“Did you see the hair and makeup people on your way over? They’re late.” Cassidy gives me what could almost be considered a welcoming smile—but looks more like a sneer.
“From my room down the hall to here? No, I didn’t.” Yeah, it was a little bitchy, but it’s hard to be nice to her when she gives nothing nice back. I hang my dress on a rolling rack that holds the other dresses.
Isa calls me over. “Are you hungry? I’m having salads and sandwiches delivered. I should have asked what everyone wanted, but I made sure there’s a little of everything.”
Cassidy makes a face. “I hope the dressing is on the side.”
“I’m sure whatever you ordered will be perfect,” I say and catch Lia giving Cassidy a look that says she would also like to push her down a flight of stairs.
Lia smiles at Isa. “I’m famished. I’ll eat anything.”
“You’re so lucky you can do that and not put weight on. Not everyone can.” Cassidy gives me a smug look that pretty much tells me she knows why I needed my dress last night.
Isa looks from Cassidy to me and back. “Cassidy, could you do me a huge favor? Could you go down to the front desk and see if you can locate the hair and makeup crew?”
Cassidy takes out her phone. “I’ll call down.”
“Oh, no,” Isa waves. “It’s better if you go in person. It’ll resolve a lot faster. Plus, if they’re there you can help them find their way up.”
“Isn’t that what the island staff is for?” Cassidy’s nose does that wrinkle thing that reminds me of when a person realizes someone around them has stepped in shit.
Cassidy looks at me as if I might volunteer then to Lia. We smile back and pretend we don’t know what she wants.
With a dramatic sigh she flounces out of the suite and closes the door loudly behind her. I don’t say anything. I refuse to say anything. Lia shoots me a pained look as if she’s fighting the same battle.
Isa wiggles her perfectly shaped eyebrows up and down. “It must be hard for her to be a bridesmaid when she doesn’t know me well. I asked her because of Gage. She probably just takes time to warm up to people.”
“Sure,” Zeke’s wife says, but she doesn’t sound convinced. r />
“I bet that’s it,” I add. I don’t care if it’s true, I don’t want Isa worrying about some bitch when this should be one of the happiest days of her life.
Lia smiles at me. “You’re single, right?”
“I am.”
She winks at Isa. “Have you introduced her to Barrett yet? I heard he didn’t bring a date.”
I blush so hot there is no hiding it.
Isa steps closer. “You met him last night. What did you think, Audrey?”
“I did. He’s okay,” I say thickly. Lia’s a sweetheart. I’m not embarrassed she might think I like Barrett, but I’m also not ready to shout that we’ve been intimate. “Not really my type.”
Isa nods dramatically. “Yeah, who wants tall, dark, and handsome?” She elbows me playfully. “He lives less than an hour away from you in Massachusetts. Just something to consider.”
I laugh it off. “I’ll keep that in mind, but I’m sure he has enough women in his life already.”
Lia cocks her head to one side. “I don’t know. He doesn’t bring any around. I mean, I’m sure he dates, but no one important enough to speak of.” Her expression turns serious. “Barrett isn’t easy to get to know, but Zeke says he has his reasons. I like Barrett. He’s a good, solid friend once he cares about someone. I’d love to see him find a nice woman.”
Isa puts her arm around my shoulders. “Audrey is as nice as they come. What do you say we attempt a little matchmaking? How cool would it be if she ends up with Barrett?”
“I’m in,” Lia says with a huge smile. “We’re all together for the week. We could arrange some romantic outings.”
I cough. “Let’s not and say we did. If it’s meant to be it’ll all happen naturally.” Or decadently. My face warms again as memories from the shower flood back. This is bad. I don’t want to think of Barrett in terms of a possible mate. I’m a second-date-kiss, two-months-before-sex girl. I would never start a relationship with naked first—ask questions later.