They got in her car, and it was almost comical how big he looked in it. The only other person usually in her car with her these days was Jen, and she was tiny compared to him.
Allison hated to remind him because she got the feeling their age difference was a big deal to him. But she figured he’d known how old she was almost from day one and a number didn’t define your maturity. Rodney was a perfect example of that. He was now Leo’s former work-release partner. Leo had since requested to be switched because as he’d explained, he just couldn’t deal with the guy’s immature ass.
“It may be legal, but I can’t even drink alcohol legally yet, so weed is out of the question for me as well. You got a taste of what my sister’s like.” She grinned, feeling evil, but even he smirked at the comment. “She’d literally kick my ass if she ever found out I was doing anything illegal.”
“Is that right?” He turned to her curiously, just another one of the many expressions she’d been privy to now from this otherwise reserved and once utterly mysterious man. “I’ve been meaning to ask you. I know she didn’t like me—at all—that first day. She know we’re . . .?”
He glanced out the window, pausing for a moment, but that last word nearly stopped Allison’s heart. We’re what?
Before her mind could even finish the thought, he finished his comment. “She know we’re still in touch?”
Gulping, Allison put on her sunglasses. This time she did the stalling before responding. Over the years because of her sister’s unpredictable reactions to so many things, Allison had gotten good at stalling for a few moments to think over her answers to some of Lila’s questions. In this case, she feigned having to concentrate extra hard on backing out of the parking stall.
“Ali?”
“Hmm?”
Rubbernecking all the way around now to make a good show of her need to focus, Allison’s mind raced for an appropriate way to respond.
“She doesn’t know, does she?”
Glad for the dark sunglasses, Allison turned to face him as she finished pulling out of the parking space. “She hasn’t been home much these past few weeks,” Allison said very matter-of-factly, as she brought her eyes back to her driving, and lifted her chin. “And when she has been, our conversations have been mainly about her upcoming fight and her modeling shoots. Her life has changed so drastically in the past few months. So, yeah, I don’t think I’ve mentioned it.”
She refused to turn to him, and for once since she’d started talking to him, she couldn’t quite make out what felt like a sudden change in mood. His overwhelming presence was such a large part of that car now Allison could literally feel him tense. At least it was what his sitting up a little straighter felt like to her. Only thing she was sure of was he likely didn’t buy her not thinking she’d mentioned it. He knew damn well—as well as she did anyway—that she knew she hadn’t. Was he mad? Insulted? Hurt?
His chuckling surprised her. They reached a stop, and she turned to him, but he was looking out his window. “What?” He shook his head, still glancing out the window but didn’t say anything. “What?”
He turned to her with one of those big beautiful smiles that made her heart flip. “Nothing.”
Allison felt her brow arch a bit defensively. Was that a sarcastic chuckle aimed at Lila? So what if she’d kept it from her sister. He had no idea why she wouldn’t want to add to her sister’s worry.
“Something’s amusing?” she asked as she pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant.
“I just think it’s cute that you’d be afraid to tell her.”
“I’m not afraid.” Allison was aware she sounded a little too defensive, but it was the truth. “I just know she’d worry. I told you she worries about everything when it comes to me.”
Allison had already told him about being orphaned at a young age. That it’d been just her and Lila for years. Though they hadn’t gotten too deep into it, he did know how close she and her sister were. So, he had to understand this.
“She’d be right to worry about this.”
Allison turned to him, confused. “About what?”
“Running with the wrong people—wrong crowd—is one of the top reasons people end up in trouble.”
His expression was a strange one. It was relaxed enough, and he didn’t seem upset or anything, but there was something strained about it, despite the slight smirk he still wore.
“Look it up,” he added as if she might not believe him. “It’s well documented.”
“Having an occasional lunch with you isn’t running with you,” she said, feeling that familiar flutter in her belly. “And I don’t think of you as the wrong people or crowd. You said you’ve learned from your mistakes, and you’re obviously trying to better yourself. It’s the first thing I’d point out if Lila ever had an issue with my . . . staying in touch with you.”
Talking about this made her insanely nervous. It was like they were actually addressing what was happening when, so far, they’d both been pretending what they were doing was meaningless. Something that just happened on a whim. Not something either of them looked forward to and thought of constantly given the continued moments that kept happening.
“I’m just saying,” he said as he opened his door. “I’d be more surprised if she didn’t have an issue with it.”
They got out of the car and walked around it to the restaurant’s entrance. The reminder that it was more of a sit-down restaurant than a fast food place like the others they’d frequented so far had the flutters in her belly going again. Seeing a few of the regulars from the gym made her a little nervous. This would be more than just grabbing a bite to eat if she ever had to explain it to Lila. But just as quickly, her belly was doing the fluttering again.
Simple things like hearing the waiter say, “Table for two,” and then their eyes meeting as they sat down across from each other were way more exciting than Allison knew they should be. The waiter gave them menus then took their drink orders and left to fetch them. Someone else dropped off water and chips and salsa.
“Let me see that article again.”
Leo held out his hand. Allison cued it up on her phone screen and handed him her phone. As usual, it made her nervous to watch someone read anything she wrote, so she focused on the menu instead. She heard him chuckle. “Intimidating but gentle giant?”
Surprised that he was already at that part, she glanced over her menu with a smile, even as her cheeks heated. “You’re already there? You read fast.”
“When you’re locked up, it’s the one thing you do most.”
He went back to reading, and she went back to her menu, reaching out for a chip and dipping it in the salsa every now and again. She was trying to decide between the garlic shrimp or the chipotle crab cakes.
“What did your sister say about the front-page article?”
“Haven’t told her.”
The moment the words were out, she wished she could take them back. Allison had since mentioned on more than one occasion how huge it would be to get a front-page story. How much she’d been wanting this and how Lila was her biggest cheerleader assuring her it’d happen. She may not have gotten too intimate in their conversations yet, but if he knew anything about her, it was how close she and Lila were. She glanced over her menu, and sure enough, he was peering at her.
“You haven’t told her?”
Of course, he’d be surprised she told him first. “She won’t be home until later.” She glanced back down at her menu. “I don’t wanna tell her. I wanna show her.”
That was partially true; though Allison knew she’d put off calling Lila in her haste to tell Leo about it. She knew full well she could easily show her by including a link to the story in a text.
She took a quick sip of the water the waiter had since dropped off. “I just wish the timing had been different,” she said, trying to steer the conversation in another direction.
“You mean that this hadn’t happened when everything is happening for her?”
br />
“No.” She shook her head, surprised by his interpretation of this. “Not even close. It’s just that everyone knows about the ongoing head butting Carson and I do, have been doing since—”
“Who’s Carson?”
“My editor,” she explained, grabbing another chip. “I told you, on top of the fact that he’s been so hard to impress, he and I get into it a lot. The whole class has been witness to many of our debates. Then he and I—”
She caught herself before saying it, nearly choking on her chip in the process. Taking a sip of her water again, she coughed then cleared her throat, pointing at her neck, explaining the obvious. “Went down the wrong way.”
Glancing back at her menu, she tried to reason that his asking so immediately who Carson was didn’t mean anything. He just needed clarification before she went on with her story. That was perfectly reasonable. She was being ridiculous to think he’d care either way about what she’d almost said without thinking. “The chipotle crab cakes look good.”
“You didn’t finish,” he said, and she glanced over her menu, stupidly pretending not to understand. “You and Carson what?”
As innocuous as his tone was, there was something just slightly demanding about his inquiry.
“Oh.” She shook her head. “I’m just being paranoid because it’s my first front-page story.”
“Paranoid about what?”
Taking a breath, she decided to just say it. What was the big deal? She really was being ridiculous in assuming he’d be even the slightest bit annoyed with hearing about her night out with Carson. A few days prior when she arrived at the gym, she’d been witness to him chatting with one of the female trainers notorious for flirting. For once, Allison was glad for his broodiness because he didn’t appear to appreciate being bothered while he was trying to train. But then it happened. The girl said something then giggled loudly about it. While it wasn’t nearly as beautiful as some of the smiles Allison had been treated to, he cracked a smile, shook his head, and then said something to the girl that had her twirling her hair with her finger and smiling a little too big. Never in her life had Allison experienced what scathing jealousy felt like.
It was ugly.
So, it was only for that reason that she’d prefer to spare anyone feeling even remotely what she had. But again, she reasoned it was very unlikely that he was feeling anything close to the silly butterflies she felt around him. Swallowing hard, she put her menu down, watching as he tried to fish a piece of avocado out of the salsa with his chip. “We had dinner just a few weeks ago for the first time ever, and then next thing you know I get a front-page story.”
The movement of his chip in the salsa bowl slowed almost to a standstill. She glanced up at his face, but he was still staring at the chip. “A romantic dinner?”
He finally gave up on the avocado and bit into the chip with just the salsa. His eyes were on hers now, vacant of any emotion; though the intensity was ever present. Allison’s mind raced. While the dinner hadn’t been a romantic one, her relationship with Carson had definitely changed since then. Her concern over the timeline of that happening and her story making the front page was a valid one.
Allison knew what she’d be up against should she ever get her hopes up about anything happening between her and Leo. Already his continuing to allow even a friendship between them was a surprise. Being completely honest about this now would only pile on more reasons for him to steer clear of anything more than even this unlikely friendship between them. She risked having him cut her off altogether. Only Allison’s heart yearned for even a sign of what she’d begun to suspect: that he too was beginning to feel for her the insanity she’d begun feeling for him weeks ago.
Did she dare be completely honest and see how he reacted? Or should she be vague, tone it down considerably, and not risk his possibly going back to ignoring her again?
Chewing the corner of her lip, she took a deep breath, feeling her heart thud against her chest as her head continued to debate.
Twelve
BEAST
“No,” Allison said, shaking her head, then bit into a chip.
The single word relieved some of the irrational tension he’d begun to feel. Though he did his best to hide it. This was further proof of what Allison was already capable of doing to him. It’d been just weeks since he’d met her and unwisely began to let her in. Already, there’d been too many times when he’d had to calm his unreasonable sense of entitlement.
It was one thing to feel like the horny assholes down at the gym, who’d seen him around Allison enough times now, should at least question whether she was off limits. So, his annoyance with them openly sizing her up the way they did when she wasn’t looking—but Leo caught it—was reasonably understandable. But it was another thing, and completely uncalled for, to be so annoyed about hearing she had a social life outside the gym.
If anything, this should relieve him. He’d begun to think maybe, despite the age difference, Allison might actually be considering this to be more than the acquaintanceship they had now. Maybe that was why she never spoke of a social life. Of course, Leo refused to ask her about it, so it’d never been discussed. But it made perfect sense she’d have one. As well she should, and this would take the pressure off his constant stressing about whether he should just go with this. Whatever happened, happened. That decision would be out of his hands if she was someone else’s chick.
She finished chewing and wiped her mouth. “The dinner was a group thing, I mean. But things between him and me have changed since that evening and . . .”
Of course, the fucking waiter would arrive right at that moment to take their orders. Leo had been so caught up with their conversation he’d hardly looked through the menu. Allison, on the other hand, was ready with her order. “I’ll have the chipotle crab cakes,” she said, handing the waiter her menu.
Leo skimmed over the menu one more time before just handing it back to the waiter. “I’ll take the shrimp cocktail and a couple of ceviche tostadas,” he said, going with what he knew was always a safe bet.
“Ooh, ceviche,” Allison said then frowned. “I shouldn’t though.”
“Why not?” Leo asked, annoyed by her constant worry with her weight.
As far as he was concerned, Allison’s curves were smoking hot and the reason for too many of his long showers lately. It was absurd to him that she’d think they were anything but cock-hardening and perfect.
“The crab cakes are already fried. Spandex was meant to stretch, but—”
“Bring her a ceviche tostada,” Leo said to the waiter before she could finish and give the waiter permission to eye her spandex outfit.
“You got it.” The waiter nodded then smiled and walked away.
Leo turned back to Allison. “You were saying?”
She smirked, shaking her head. “I was saying spandex was meant to stretch but not as much as mine do. I need to lay off meals with so many calories.”
“News flash.” Leo reached for his glass of water. “You look hot as fuck in your workout outfits. Trust me. No one in that gym or anywhere is complaining about how nicely that spandex hugs all those curves.”
He brought the glass of water to his mouth when he realized he’d just spewed out a bunch of shit again without even thinking. At least before he was only guilty of admitting he thought his young gym acquaintance was adorable. Now, he’d just admitted he thought her hot and that he’d been enjoying her curves all this time.
No surprise her face reddened in response to his comment. Trying not to panic or bring more attention to his latest fuck-up, he shook his head as he set his glass down. “So, what were you saying about you and Carson?”
Just saying the dude’s name already left a bad taste in his mouth. Leo straightened out, needing to get his shit together before she picked up on anything. As good as she was getting at reading him, she didn’t even have to try if he was going to be so damn obvious about it.
Allison wasn’t the only one
good at this reading-people shit. Leo didn’t miss the tiny lift of her brow in reaction to his question. Though he wasn’t nearly as good as she was in zeroing in on the possible reason. Her face was still pink from his earlier remark, and that lift of her brow he caught wasn’t exactly a playful one. So, he was clueless as to what to make of it.
Fidgeting with her napkin, she looked him straight in the eyes. She cleared her throat. It was soft, and Leo suspected she was hoping he wouldn’t hear, but he did. At least he already knew what that meant—she was nervous.
“Like I said, he and I butted heads often in the past, but ever since that group night out, things have really changed.” She lifted and dropped a delicate little shoulder, and as usual, Leo’s eyes followed her every move. “Things have just been noticeably amicable between him and me ever since, and I’m sure it’s crossed the minds of some of the others in class that maybe that’s why my story made the front page.”
Noticeably amicable? What the fuck did that mean? His whole life it’d been impossible to hide any irritation once he’d begun to feel it. Only this was different from any he’d ever felt, and he knew exactly why.
Sucked in.
It was happening faster than he’d dreaded. There was no way to hide it now because he was certain, as good as she was at reading him, she already had. So, he took the only other route he could. “Fuck anyone’s assumptions. I read the article. It’s front-page worthy, and anyone who reads it wouldn’t be able to argue that.”
Again, she seemed surprised by his reaction but then smiled. “Well, thank you for that. My sister would agree with you in a heartbeat. Verbatim,” she added with a giggle.
A couple of guys he recognized from the gym walked into the restaurant, eyeing him and Allison casually before being seated. Leo knew he should drop it already, talk about anything else. But curiosity got the best of him, damn it. More than anything, he just needed to know. He needed more ammunition as to why he really should cut her off completely. This harmless little just-staying-in-touch bullshit already had him considering doing things he vowed he never would.