CHAPTER XXIV.
DECISION.
Tossed backwards and forwards on a wild sea of doubt--a vessel withoutballast, compass, or rudder--was the mind of the miserable Pollux. Thecourtier paced for hours up and down a verandah where the cool breezeof heaven could fan him, and where he would be secure frominterruption. Ever and anon Pollux tore his beard, or smote hisbreast; unconsciously giving expression by outward gesture to theinward torture which he felt. Was he to give up all at once--all forwhich he had bartered his soul, rank, wealth, position--to begin lifeagain on the lowest round of the ladder, with the brand of disgrace,the burden of shame upon him? Could he endure to appear in thepresence of Maccabeus, to sue from him the place of hewer of wood anddrawer of water; to exchange the pride of power and pomp of wealth forhardship and want, poverty and peril? Pollux felt that he could notbring his pride to submit to the degradation, or his worldliness to theloss. The leap to be taken was from such a height, and into such anabyss, that it seemed as if he must be dashed in pieces by the fall.
But what was the alternative, if the dreaded leap were not taken? IfZarah remained firm in the faith, she must die;--could the fatherendure to witness the martyrdom of his beautiful child? And his ownlife--was it not in danger? Was not instant flight from court the onlymeans of affording a chance of safety either to parent or daughter? wasit not the only means of delivering an apostate from the execrations ofhis countrymen, the curse of his mother, the impending vengeance of theMost High! Conscience would no longer be silenced--Zarah had arousedthe sleeper; beside the faith and purity of his own child, Pollux hadregarded himself almost as a demon!
And Zarah had awakened not only conscience, but hope. She had clung tothe apostate with tenderness, not shrunk back from him with horror.She had not, then, been taught to regard her parent as one who hadforfeited all claim to her affection. Zarah had spoken of thepossibility of his yet giving joy to the lofty-souled mother whomPollux, in the midst of his guilt, had not ceased to reverence andlove. For many years the apostate had tried to drive from his mind allthought of Hadassah; now her image came vividly before him, not in theattitude of uttering a malediction, but as holding out her arms toreceive back her prodigal son.
While Pollux was deliberating, and Zarah praying, Lysimachus wascarousing amidst boon companions in the city. The ruin and approachingexecution of his rival gave unwonted zest to the revels of theprofligate Syrian.
"Here's to our friend the magnificent Pollux!" exclaimed Lysimachus,raising on high a huge goblet of wine. "He is going on a long journeyto-morrow; here's to his quick passage over Styx, and welcome at theshadowy court of King Pluto!"
And those who listened were not ashamed to laugh at the jest, or todrink the toast, though they had mixed in familiar intercourse withPollux, flattered and followed him, when he had basked in the sunshineof royal favour. One of the guests was calculating how he should nowget possession of some coveted gem which he had seen sparkling on thegirdle of the man to whom he had once sworn unalterable friendship;another fixed on the Arab steed of the ruined courtier as his share ofthe spoils. There was not one of the sycophants met together at thatnight-revel who had a word of warning or a thought of pity to give tohim who had been the most admired, envied, and flattered of all thenobles who composed the brilliant court of Antiochus Epiphanes!
Stars were paling, the night was waning, the door of safety was slowly,imperceptibly closing--soon, soon the decision of Pollux, if made,would be made too late! When once the course of duty is clear to themind, perilous is every minute of delay: while we hesitate, the enemysteals on; while we doubt, we may find ourselves under his fangs!
"Zarah shall decide for me!" exclaimed the unhappy waverer at last."If I find her resolution immovable, come what may, I will give mychild one chance of escape from the horrible fate with which she isthreatened."
In a few minutes, pale and haggard from his contending emotions, Polluxre-entered the apartment in which he had left his daughter.
"Zarah!" he cried, in a hollow tone, as he grasped the maiden by thewrist, and scanned her countenance with an almost despairing gaze, "Icome to ask what is your final decision. Are you still insane enoughto choose tortures and death?"
Zarah looked her father full in the face; she pale, but she blenchednot. In a calm, unhesitating voice she replied, "I will never deny myfaith."
"Then the die is cast!" exclaimed Pollux, almost relieved by being atleast freed from the misery of indecision. "We live or perishtogether!--we will make our escape before daybreak."
There was little time left for words--none to express the thankful joywhich swelled the heart of Zarah. She was rescuing her father fromdishonour and guilt; she was giving him back to his country.
"Put on this dress of a Syrian slave-girl, which I have brought foryou," said Pollux. "Take up yon empty water-jar; it must appear as ifyou went to fill it at the tank. We cannot keep close together; thatwould awaken suspicion. We shall have guards to pass, and possiblyother persons besides, though at this very early hour even slaves willscarcely have commenced their morning toils."
"How shall I find my way, father?" inquired Zarah; "this vast palace isas a labyrinth to me."
"You must never quite lose sight of me," Pollux replied; "thoughfollowing at a sufficient distance to prevent its appearing that yourmovements are guided by mine. But no, that plan will not answer," hecontinued, pressing his forehead with his hand; "I should not then haveyou in view, and, should you be challenged, I should be unable to cometo your help. You, my child, must go first."
"Oh, my father, my presence will fearfully increase your danger!" criedZarah. "Leave me here, I implore, and make your escape alone. No onewill challenge you."
Pollux silenced his daughter's expostulation with an impatient gestureof the hand. "Attend to my directions," he said; "we have wasted toomuch time already. You will follow me through the first court, andthen you will precede me. Keep to the right till you pass the firstsentries; then you will find yourself in a garden, in the centre ofwhich is a tank. Fill, or make show of filling, your jar. Then thelong dark passage which, you will see on the left will conduct you to apostern gate of the palace; there will be a guard at that also."
"How shall I pass them?" asked Zarah, who began to realize thedifficulties and perils of the undertaking before her.
"I know not; but God, whom you serve, will help you, my brave andinnocent child! I will be following at no great distance--everysoldier or slave will know me--call me, and I will come to your aid."
"Father, give me your blessing," faltered Zarah.
"_My_ blessing!" ejaculated Pollux, drawing back; "does any one ask ablessing from a wretch from whom it would sear and blast more than acurse from the lips of another!"
"Oh, never say so!" cried Zarah. "You doing now what isgenerous--noble--right! You are casting in your lot with the people ofGod; like Lot, you are turning your back upon Sodom."
"And you are the angel leading me thence," exclaimed Pollux. "Oh,Zarah, Zarah, sainted child of a sainted woman, you who have been thefirst to cast a gleam of hope on the darkness of guilt and despair, ifever I find mercy from man or from God, if ever I look again on theface of my mother, if ever I escape the righteous doom of an apostate,it is owing to you! Whatever be the result of our perilous enterpriseto-night, remember that I thank you, I bless you--and you shall beblessed, O my daughter!" Pollux laid both his trembling hands on thehead of his kneeling child, and uttered for her the first prayer to thetrue God which the apostate had dared to utter for many guilty,miserable years.