Chapter X
In which is explained the sublime mystery of keel-hauling--Snarleyyowsaves Smallbones from being drowned, although Smallbones would havedrowned him.
It is a dark morning; the wind is fresh from the northwest; flakes ofsnow are seen wafting here and there by the wind, the avant-couriers ofa heavy fall; the whole sky is of one murky grey, and the sun is hiddenbehind a dense bank. The deck of the cutter is wet and slippery, andDick Short has the morning watch. He is wrapt up in a Flushingpea-jacket, with thick mittens on his hands; he looks about him, and nowand then a fragment of snow whirls into his eye; he winks it out, itmelts and runs like a tear down his cheek. If it were not that it iscontrary to man-of-war custom he would warm himself with the_double-shuffle_, but such a step would be unheard of on thequarter-deck of even the cutter _Yungfrau_.
The tarpaulin over the hatchway is pushed on one side, and the spacebetween the coamings is filled with the bull head and broad shoulders ofCorporal Van Spitter, who, at last, gains the deck; he looks round himand apparently is not much pleased with the weather. Before he proceedsto business, he examines the sleeves and front of his jacket, and havingbrushed off with the palm of his hand a variety of blanket-hairs,adhering to the cloth, he is satisfied, and now turns to the right andto the left, and forward and aft--in less than a minute he goes rightround the compass. What can Corporal Van Spitter want at so early anhour? He has not come up on deck for nothing, and yet he appears to bestrangely puzzled: the fact is, by the arrangements of last night, itwas decided, that this morning, if Snarleyyow did not make hisappearance in the boat sent on shore for fresh beef for the ship'scompany, the unfortunate Smallbones was to be _keel-hauled_.
What a delightful morning for a keel-hauling!
This ingenious process, which, however, like many other good oldcustoms, has fallen into disuse, must be explained to the non-nauticalreader. It is nothing more nor less than sending a poor navigator on avoyage of discovery under the bottom of the vessel, lowering him[2] downover the bows, and with ropes detaining him exactly in his positionunder the kelson, while he is drawn aft by a hauling line until he makeshis appearance at the rudder-chains, generally speaking quite out ofbreath, not at the rapidity of his motion, but because, when so longunder the water, he has expended all the breath in his body, and isinduced to take in salt water _en lieu._ There is much merit in thisinvention; people are very apt to be content with walking the deck of aman-of-war, and complain of it as a hardship, but when once they havelearnt, by experience, the difference between being comfortable aboveboard, and the number of deprivations which they have to submit to whenunder board and overboard at the same time, they find that there areworse situations than being on the deck of a vessel--we say privationswhen under board, for they really are very important:--you are deprivedof the air to breathe, which is not borne with patience even by aphilosopher, and you are obliged to drink salt water instead of fresh.In the days of keel-hauling, the bottoms of vessels were not coppered,and in consequence were well studded with a species of shell-fish whichattached themselves, called barnacles, and as these shells were allopen-mouthed and with sharp cutting points, those who underwent thispunishment (for they were made by the ropes at each side, fastened totheir arms, to hug the kelson of the vessel) were cut and scored allover their body, as if with so many lancets, generally coming upbleeding in every part, and with their faces, especially their noses, asif they had been gnawed by the rats; but this was considered ratheradvantageous than otherwise, as the loss of blood restored the patientif he was not quite drowned, and the consequence was, that one out ofthree, it is said, have been known to recover after their submarineexcursion. The Dutch have the credit, and we will not attempt to takefrom them their undoubted right, of having invented this very agreeabledescription of punishment. They are considered a heavy, phlegmatic sortof people, but on every point in which the art of ingeniously tormentingis in request, it must be admitted that they have taken the lead of muchmore vivacious and otherwise more inventive nations.
[Footnote 2: The author has here explained keel-hauling as practised inthose times in small _fore and aft_ vessels. In large and square-riggedvessels, the man was hauled up to one main-yard arm, and dropped intothe sea, and hauled under the bottom of the vessel to the other; butthis in small fore and aft vessels was not so easily effected, nor wasit considered sufficient punishment.]
And now the reader will perceive why Corporal Van Spitter was in adilemma. With all the good-will in the world, with every anxiety tofulfil his duty, and to obey his superior officer, he was not a seaman,and did not know how to commence operations. He knew nothing aboutfoddering a vessel's bottom, much less how to fodder it with the carcassof one of his fellow-creatures. The corporal, as we said before, turnedround and round the compass to ascertain if he could compass his wishes;at last, he commenced by dragging one-rope's end from one side andanother from the other; those would do for the side ropes, but he wanteda long one from forward and another from aft, and how to get the onefrom aft under the cutter's bottom was a puzzle; and then there was themast and the rigging in his way;--the corporal reflected--the more heconsidered the matter, the more his brain became confused; he was at anonplus, and he gave it up in despair: he stood still, took out a bluecotton handkerchief from the breast of his jacket and wiped hisforehead, for the intensity of thought had made him perspire--anythinglike reflection was very hard work for Corporal Van Spitter.
"Tousand tyfels!" at last exclaimed the corporal, and he paused andknocked his big head with his fist.
"Hundred thousand tyfels!" repeated the corporal after five minutes'more thought.
"Twenty hundred tousand tyfels!" muttered the corporal, once moreknocking his head: but he knocked in vain; like an empty house, therewas no one within to answer the appeal. The corporal could no more: sohe returned his pocket-handkerchief to the breast of his jacket, and aheavy sigh escaped from his own breast. All the devils in hell werementally conjured and summoned to his aid, but they were, it is to bepresumed, better employed, for although the work in hand was diabolicalenough, still, Smallbones was such a poor devil, that probably he mighthave been considered as remotely allied to the fraternity.
It may be inquired why, as this was _on service_, Corporal Van Spitterdid not apply for the assistance of the seamen belonging to the vessel,particularly to the officer in charge of the deck; but the fact was,that he was unwilling to do this, knowing that his application would bein vain, for he was aware that the whole crew sided with Smallbones; itwas only as a last resource that he intended to do this, and being nowat his _wit's_ end, he walked up to Dick Short, who had been watchingthe corporal's motions in silence, and accosted him.
"If you please, Mynheer Short, Mynheer Vanslyperken give orders dat deboy be keel-hauled dis morning:--I want haben de rope and de way."
Short looked at the corporal, and made no reply.
"Mynheer Short, I haben tell de order of Mynheer Vanslyperken."
Dick Short made no reply, but leaning over the hatchway, called out,"Jemmy."
"Ay, ay," replied Jemmy Ducks, turning out of his hammock and droppingon the lower deck.
Corporal Van Spitter, who imagined that Mr Short was about to complywith his request after his own Harpocratic fashion, remained quietly onthe deck until Jemmy Ducks made his appearance.
"Hands," quoth Short.
Jemmy piped the hands up.
"Boat," quoth Short, turning his head to the small boat hoisted upastern.
Now as all this was apparently preparatory to the work required, thecorporal was satisfied. The men soon came up with their hammocks ontheir shoulders, which they put into the nettings, and then Jemmyproceeded to lower down the boat. As soon as it was down and hauled upalongside, Short turned round to Coble, and waving his hand towards theshore, said,
"Beef."
Coble, who perfectly understood him, put a new quid into his cheek, wentdown the side, and pulled on shore to bring off the fresh beef andvegetables for t
he ship's company; after which Dick Short walked thedeck and gave no further orders.
Corporal Van Spitter perceiving this, went up to him again.
"Mynheer Short, you please get ready."
"No!" thundered Short, turning away.
"Got for dam, dat is mutiny," muttered the corporal, who immediatelybacked stern foremost down the hatchway, to report to his commandant thestate of affairs on deck. Mr Vanslyperken had already risen; he hadslept but one hour during the whole night, and that one hour was sooccupied with wild and fearful dreams that he awoke from his sleepunrefreshed. He had dreamed that he was making every attempt to drownSmallbones, but without effect, for, so soon as the lad was dead he cameto life again; he thought that Smallbones' soul was incorporated in asmall animal something like a mouse, and that he had to dislodge it fromits tenement of clay; but as soon as he drove it from one part of thebody it would force its way back again into another; if he forced it outby the mouth after incredible exertions, which made him perspire atevery pore, it would run back again into the ear; if forced from thence,through the nostril, then in at the toe, or any other part; in short, helaboured apparently in his dream for years, but without success. Andthen the "change came o'er the spirit of his dream;" but still there wasanalogy, for he was now trying to press his suit, which was now a liquidin a vial, into the widow Vandersloosh, but in vain. He administered itagain and again, but it acted as an emetic, and she could not stomachit, and then he found himself rejected by all--the widow kicked him,Smallbones stamped upon him, even Snarleyyow flew at him and bit him; atlast, he fell with an enormous paving-stone round his neck, descendinginto a horrible abyss head foremost, and, as he increased his velocity,he awoke trembling and confused, and could sleep no more. This dream wasnot one to put Mr Vanslyperken into good humour, and two severe cuts onhis cheek with the razor as he attempted to shave, for his hand stilltrembled, had added to his discontent, when it was raised to its climaxby the entrance of Corporal Van Spitter, who made his report of themutinous conduct of the first officer. Never was Mr Vanslyperken in sucha tumult of rage; he pulled off some beaver from his hat to staunch theblood, and wiping off the remainder of the lather, for he put aside theoperation of shaving till his hand was more steady, he threw on his coatand followed the corporal on deck, looked round with a savage air, spiedout the diminutive form of Jemmy Ducks, and desired him to pipe "allhands to keel-haul."
Whereupon Jemmy put his pipe to his mouth, and after a long flourish,bawled out what appeared to Mr Vanslyperken to be--all hands to _beheel-hauled;_ but Jemmy slurred over quickly the little change made inthe order, and, although the men tittered, Mr Vanslyperken thought itbetter to say nothing. But there is an old saying, that you may bring ahorse to the pond, but you cannot make him drink. Mr Vanslyperken hadgiven the order, but no one attempted to commence the arrangements. Theonly person who showed any activity was Smallbones himself, who, notaware that he was to be punished, and hearing all hands piped forsomething or another, came shambling, all legs and wings, up thehatchway, and looked around to ascertain what was to be done. He was metby the bulky form of Corporal Van Spitter, who, thinking thatSmallbones' making his appearance in such haste was with the intentionof jumping overboard to avoid his punishment, immediately seized him bythe collar with the left hand, turned round on a pivot towards MrVanslyperken, and raising his right hand to his foraging cap, reported,"The prisoner on deck, Mynheer Vanslyperken." This roused the lieutenantto action, for he had been walking the deck for a half minute indeep thought.
"Is all ready there, forward?" cried Mr Vanslyperken.
No one replied.
"I say, boatswain, is all ready?"
"No, sir," replied Jemmy; "nobody knows how to set about it. I don't,anyhow--I never seed anything of the like since I've been in theservice--the whole of the ship's company say the same." But even theflakes of snow, which now fell thick, and whitened the blue jacket of MrVanslyperken, could not assuage his wrath--he perceived that the menwere refractory, so he summoned the six marines--who were completelyunder the control of their corporal.
Poor Smallbones had, in the meantime, discovered what was going on, andthought that he might as well urge something in his own defence.
"If you please, what are you going for to do with me?" said the lad,with a terrified look.
"Lead him forward," said Mr Vanslyperken; "follow me, marines;" and thewhole party, headed by the lieutenant, went before the mast.
"Strip him," cried Mr Vanslyperken.
"Strip me, with the snow flying like this! An't I cold enough already?"
"You'll be colder when you're under the bottom of the cutter," repliedhis master.
"O Lord! then it is keel-hauling a'ter all; why what have I done?" criedSmallbones, as the marines divested him of his shirt, and exposed hisemaciated body to the pitiless storm.
"Where's Snarleyyow, sir?--confess."
"Snarleyyow--how should I know, sir? it's very hard, because your dog isnot to be found, that I'm to be dragged under the bottom of a vessel."
"I'll teach you to throw paving-stones in the canal."
"Paving-stones, sir!" and Smallbones' guilty conscience flew in hisface. "Well, sir, do as you please, I'm sure I don't care; if I am to bekilled, be quick about it--I'm sure I sha'n't come up alive."
Here Mr Vanslyperken remembered his dream, and the difficulty which hehad in driving Smallbones' soul out of his body, and he was fearful thateven keel-hauling would not settle Smallbones.
By the directions of Mr Vanslyperken, the hauling ropes and othertackle were collected by the marines, for the seamen stood by, andappeared resolved, to a man, to do nothing, and, in about half an hour,all was ready. Four marines manned the hauling line, one was placed ateach side-rope fastened to the lad's arms, and the corporal, as soon ashe had lifted the body of Smallbones over the larboard gunnel, haddirections to attend the bow-line, and not allow him to be dragged ontoo fast: a better selection for this purpose could not have been madethan Corporal Van Spitter. Smallbones had been laid without his clotheson the deck, now covered with snow, during the time that the lines weremaking fast to him; he remained silent, and as usual, when punished,with his eyes shut, and as Vanslyperken watched him with feelings ofhatred, he perceived an occasional smile to cross the lad's haggardfeatures. He knows where the dog is, thought Vanslyperken, and hisdesire to know what had become of Snarleyyow overcame his vengeance--headdressed the shivering Smallbones.
"Now, sir, if you wish to escape the punishment, tell me what has becomeof the dog, for I perceive that you know."
Smallbones grinned as his teeth chattered--he would have undergone adozen keel-haulings rather than have satisfied Vanslyperken.
"I give you ten minutes to think of it," continued the lieutenant; "holdall fast at present."
The snow storm now came on so thick that it was difficult to distinguishthe length of the vessel. Smallbones' naked limbs were graduallycovered, and, before the ten minutes were expired, he was wrapped up insnow as in a garment--he shook his head occasionally to clear his face,but remained silent.
"Now, sir," cried Vanslyperken, "will you tell me, or overboard you goat once? Will you tell me?"
"No," replied Smallbones.
"Do you know, you scoundrel?"
"Yes," replied Smallbones, whose indignation was roused.
"And you won't tell?"
"No," shrieked the lad--"no, never, never, never!"
"Corporal Van Spitter, over with him," cried Vanslyperken in a rage,when a sudden stir was heard amongst the men aft, and as the corporalraised up the light frame of the culprit, to carry it to the gunnel, tothe astonishment of Vanslyperken, of the corporal, and of Smallbones,Snarleyyow appeared on the forecastle, and made a rush at Smallbones, ashe lay in the corporal's arms, snapped at his leg, and then set up hisusual deep baying, "bow, bow, bow!"
The re-appearance of the dog created no small sensation--Vanslyperkenfelt that he had now no reason for keel-hauling Smallbones, whichannoyed
him as much as the sight of the dog gave him pleasure. Thecorporal, who had dropped Smallbones on the snow, was also disappointed.As for Smallbones, at the baying of the dog, he started up on his knees,and looked at it as if it were an apparition, with every demonstrationof terror in his countenance; his eyes glared upon the animal withhorror and astonishment, and he fell down in a swoon. The whole of theship's company were taken aback--they looked at one another and shooktheir heads--one only remark was made by Jansen, who muttered, "De togis no tog a'ter all."
Mr Vanslyperken ordered Smallbones to be taken below, and then walkedaft; perceiving Obadiah Coble, he inquired whence the dog had come, andwas answered that he had come off in the boat which he had taken onshore for fresh beef and vegetables. Mr Vanslyperken made no reply, but,with Snarleyyow at his heels, went down into the cabin.