He spins on his heels and heads for the side gate and disappears out of sight.
“Why would you hide so much money from me? I married you because you were the one woman who was always straight up with me, you think because you have my ring on your finger, you can start hiding shit from me and go behind my back?”
I’m trying to keep my voice down and keep this fight from Leo’s ears but it’s fucking hard.
“Don’t you dare spin this on me, none of this is my fault. I’ve always been up front with you.”
I snort, “Just not with your money, which is my money unless you’ve got yourself a secret job you’ve kept from me. Do you, babe? Do you have a secret job?”
“Cas, stop this. You know I don’t have a job, you know everything…”
“I’m trying to get to the truth, apparently, I don’t know everything. Why are you keeping shit from me?” I yell, and she steps back.
She doesn’t stop moving, she goes over to Leo and swings him up into her arms. She brushes past me, saying nothing, and storms into the house leaving me and my rage alone.
I don’t bother following her inside. If she wants to keep hiding shit from me, she can do it in the open when I’m not here.
Sparky is already on his bike, waiting for me. Wisely, his mouth remains shut and I climb on my bike as the front door slams open.
“Fuck you, Cas,” she screams, and it starts raining hundred-dollar bills. She throws a second wad of cash and then a third. Scattered around us is the twenty thousand dollars she had to pay off Jacqueline I imagine.
“There, have your fucking money.”
I bite my tongue and watch her walk inside and slam the door with as much gust as she has.
I stare at the house, but she doesn’t come back out. The cash lays on the ground, every bill I look at, I wonder why she didn’t take it and flee.
“I don’t think she’s coming back out, do you wanna hand picking it up?”
I look to my brother and while twenty thousand dollars is a lot of money to blow away in the wind, I couldn’t give a fuck about it.
“Fuck the cash.”
“Fuck the cash? Cas, this isn’t a few bills…”
“It’s money I didn’t know I had,” I shrug, “Are we going or not?”
I ignore his raised eyebrow and bring my bike to my life. Too much is starting to get to me and I don’t like it one bit.
Alannah has never hidden anything from me before and it turns out, she has been the whole fucking time.
Chapter Ten
Alannah
My body is trembling. I shiver from the rage and slide down the front door. What the hell did I just do? I don’t freak out like that. I don’t scream at my husband, and I certainly don’t throw cash around like it means nothing. What hurts more is Cas didn’t flinch. He stared at me like I was a random stranger having a meltdown in the middle of town. I’m the one he strives to make happy, we’ve had arguments before but not like this. He’s never walked out on a fight before and not only did he ride off today, he walked out on me yesterday too. His god damn mother is breaking him and in turn, it’s breaking us and my heart.
I should’ve let Cas deal with her in his own way, I know this but now, I’m angry.
My phone rings from the kitchen and I’m heading for it, undecided if I’m going to answer depending on whose calling. I already know it’s not going to be Cas, I don’t know how, but I do.
It’s Bonnie. I accept her call and put the phone on speaker.
“Hey, Sparky called and said you might need me.”
My mood thaws a fraction by Sparky’s thoughtfulness. Besides Bonnie, he is my best friend. Always has been and always will be.
“What’s happened?”
“I fucked up.”
It’s simple. I’m adult enough to own up to it.
“Cas heard I tried paying his mom to leave town, he got real mad and then accused me of saving money so I could leave him.”
She’s quiet for a beat and I can’t bear it.
“Why would he think of that, you’re like the ultimate couple.”
“You’re asking the wrong person. He’s paranoid over something I’ve never thought of before. He isn’t himself and I haven’t helped the situation.”
“How much did you offer her?”
“Twenty thousand and I regret it now.”
“You were only looking out for him, he’ll see that in time. Sparky said he was going to stay close to him today.”
A stray tear falls down my cheek and I quickly swipe it away.
“Do you want me to come over, I can be there in fifteen minutes?”
“I’ll be fine, it’s probably for the best if no one’s here when he comes home.”
If he comes home, that is. His behaviour over the last few days has been up and down and for once, I can’t gage how he’s going to be.
Even at his worst, when Oak was taken, when he came home dead, he never took his anger out on me. He came to me for solace and peace.
“Look, I better go. I’ve got twenty grand to pick up before it blows away.”
“Pick up from where?”
“Out front, he accused me of having a secret job or stealing from him, so I threw it all at him. He just sat there and did nothing.”
“Oh, Lana. I don’t know what to say, apart from, he loves the bones off you. Give him time.”
Time.
Time helps everything. Lose a loved one, give it time. Miscarry your baby, give it time and you can try again, time is everywhere and does nothing but drag out the pain.
Ending the call with Bonnie, I take a deep breath and check on Leo. He’s happily playing with his toys, oblivious to what’s going on around him.
“Do you want to play a game with mommy, Leo?” I ask him, and he grins, looking up at me from the floor.
After putting his coat back on, I sort us both out a small bag each and we head outside.
“Okay, you see all this money, we have to pick it up before it blows away. Whoever picks up the most, wins, okay?”
“Yep.”
“Good, one, two, three…go.”
It takes less than ten minutes to round up the cash and a further ten minutes to check I haven’t missed any.
Leo does well, and his bag is half filled with bills. Cas is an asshole. I honestly thought he’d be dealing with his mom a lot better than this, or at the very least, he’d come to me to help him.
He’s been pushing us out for days now and I have no idea how to deal with it myself.
“Who wins, mommy?”
“Let’s take it all inside and count it up.”
It’s so much warmer inside and after we’ve settled in the kitchen, Leo dumps his haul on the table. He managed to pick up just over four thousand and after I’ve counted my fourteen thousand, we lost just under two thousand dollars.
“You won, baby,” I smile, letting him win.
He doesn’t expect a prize or anything and goes in search of his toys. While he’s occupied with his cars and bikes, I take the money back upstairs and hide it under the floorboard in the cupboard in Leo’s bedroom, where it’s been since I started stashing the cash away.
Hours pass, the day rolls into the night and it’s still Leo and I home alone. Cas always calls if he’s going to stay late at the club, going by how he’s been lately, I don’t bother waiting for my phone to ring.
Chapter Eleven
Cas
It’s about fucking time Jameson showed his face. Leaning against his car, he blows out a long stream of smoke and flicks the cigarette to the ground.
Where Sparky shaves his head, Jameson is naturally bald, and the sun bounces off his head and I smirk as I pull over at the curb. I haven’t forgotten I’ve been waiting on information from him, but it hasn’t been at the top of my priorities.
Standing at over six foot and a half and holding a whole lot of muscle, he towers above me by half a foot. He doesn’t intimidate me. Sparky hangs back and lights a
cigarette.
“Do you want to do this inside or out here?” I ask, lighting a cigarette of my own.
I push everything going on with Alannah out of my mind and focus on the club and its future.
“This won’t take long, out here is fine,” he says, his voice gruff and deep.
“I’ve been hoping to hear from you sooner.”
“There was nothing to say,” he shrugs.
“But there is now?” Sparky asks.
He nods and pulls out a slip of paper from his inside pocket.
“It’s true, Denzel is rotting away buried somewhere in the Black mountains.”
I hiss, running my tongue over my teeth. It’s what I was expecting, but not wanting to hear. For once, Danny told the fucking truth and I’ve got to find another source of income.
“His businesses are a free for all mess, there’s already a new player taking over, and he’s asked me to pass along his number. He’s interested in continuing the arrangement you had with Denzel.”
“Does this new player have a name?” I enquire.
“Samuel Lopez.”
Samuel Lopez?
“Never heard of him.”
“You’ve heard of his father, for sure. Diego Lopez.”
Yeah, I’ve heard of him and every other fucker in our world. Diego Lopez, the biggest cocaine dealer in the South, and just as ruthless.
He would definitely have plenty of work for us, but the last I heard, he was ill, like death bed ill.
I take the number off him and he nods one last time.
“You now owe me a favour, I’ll be in touch when I need it calling in.”
With that, he climbs in his car and starts the ignition, peeling away from the club.
I don’t care what the favour will be, I can’t imagine it will be anything too taxing anyway, Jameson is known for enjoying doing his own work. Plus, it won’t be any worse than we’ve already done.
“Denzel wasn’t the nicest guy, but we knew him. Diego isn’t a guy we want to be doing business with,” Sparky murmurs.
“You heard Jameson, his son is taking over. We wouldn’t be dealing with Diego.”
“And we have no clue who this Samuel is either, how he works, how he deals with problems. I’ve never heard of him before, I don’t know his reputation.”
“We need a new supplier, Sparks and so far, this is the only contact we have,” I say, holding the number up.
“You know you’ll have to take this to a vote, the entire club will have to agree.”
“I’m well aware,” I snort.
“Are you? Cause, brother, you’re not acting right lately and I’m not the only one who is noticing.”
It’s my job to make sure the brothers have somewhere to lay their head, have cash in their pocket and support if needed, I haven’t fucking forgotten.
“If I need reminding how to run my club, I’ll come and find you.”
I’ve had enough of this bullshit, turning my back on him, I leave my bike on the curb and head for the bar.
“Don’t forget it’s Rick’s bachelor party tonight.”
Great.
Can’t wait.
Chapter Twelve
Dex
Brothers are heading in for the wedding and there is no room to move without barging into someone or someone barging into you. I have my place at the bar and I’m not moving.
Ricky’s bachelor party is in full swing and I don’t care. What I do care about is the watchful eyes following me around. Brothers are watching my every move, they have been for days. I didn’t notice them at first, I was too busy seeing Melissa everywhere I went. Now I see them and tonight I’m going to give them a show.
Her perfume fills my nose and it lingers around me. I’m slipping into madness and the more I try to cling to my sanity, I spiral faster.
Soft fingers run down my neck and I shudder knowing who they belong to. They work their way around my shoulder and across my chest, slipping down under my tee and scratch along my abs. Her touch causes me to feel sick, I swallow it down and let her carry on.
“Do you want some company?” Shannon asks and instead of answering her, I turn to the prospect.
“Prospect,” I holler, banging on the bar, “Two glasses and a bottle of tequila.”
I’m already half wasted and for every shot I pour, just as much ends up spilled on the bar.
Shannon finds this hilarious and her laugh grates on my ears. She’s ruining the moment.
“You’ve got to get the tequila in the glass,” she instructs me and covers my hand with hers as I tip the bottle.
“Fuck the glasses, let’s drink from the bottle,” I suggest, and she giggles.
“Stop laughing,” I grunt, and she frowns at me.
“What?”
“You heard me, stop laughing like that. You sound ridiculous.”
Her hand slips down to her hip and through my double vision, I can vaguely make out she’s scowling at me.
Like I give a fuck.
“You’re being a jerk,” she snaps.”
“You’re being annoying,” I slur.
“You used to be much more fun, ever since that Melissa woman stopped coming around you’ve been an asshole.”
Shooting up onto my feet, I first stumble, and then reach out to grab onto her arm.
With her being sober compared to me, she moves out of my way before I can make contact and the next face I see is Popes.
His large hands grab onto my cut and he hauls me through the crowd of brothers, and shoves me through the door to the bathroom.
“Fuck, Pope. What’s your problem?”
I push up off the floor and brace myself for another fall.
“Why are you trying to mask what you did? I told you, you have to live with it, not hide from it,” he says, quietly.
“Huh?”
The lights are too fucking bright in here and they’re distracting me from the man who is clearly pissed with me.
“I’ve been watching you for days, you’re unravelling and failing to deal with what happened. Why? Why do you think you can drink it away?” he demands, coming towards me, I back up but my back hits the wall and I have no where else to go.
“What haunts you the most, Dex? Is it that you killed her, or you burning her corpse after throwing her into her grave that you dug out?”
“Shut your mouth…”
“Tell me,” he roars, and it sobers me the fuck up.
“All of it, she doesn’t leave me alone,” I yell back in his face.
Sliding down the wall, I drop on my ass and pull on my hair. I remember every detail from the night, I can still smell her flesh burning. It fills my sense of smell and nothing gets past it.
“It’s your guilt, dumbass. Deal with it,” he urges, nudging my foot with his boot.
Why does everyone think it’s that easy? Just deal with it and move on.
“You put a bullet in her, you dug her grave and then you set her on fire. You can’t away from it, or from her.”
“How do you do it? How can you go on knowing the horrors you’ve seen and done?”
“For starters, it doesn’t bring me to my knees, so stand the fuck up.”
Looking up at him, there is no warmth in his eyes as he stares down at me, but I do feel the brotherly love. He’s trying to help, and I need to take it. I need all the help I can get.
I stumble into the wall as I rise, and he helps me up until I’m steady on my feet.
Once I’m not swaying, he grabs the back of my head and yanks me towards him.
“If you can’t get right with this, it’ll make me uneasy, and if I’m uneasy shit will get a lot worse for you.”
“It can’t…It can’t get any worse.”
“Stop drinking, start talking, and I reckon you’ll be fine. We’re here for you, all of us, use us to get right.”
He lets go of me and I manage to stay on my feet. I watch him walk out and release a pent-up breath. Looking around, this bathroom could
do with a good fucking clean. My reflection catches my eye and I look like shit. My skin is sallow, heavy bags under my eyes weigh down on my cheeks, simply put, I’ve looked much better.
Splashing cold water on my face does nothing to help my looks, but it wakes me up and I hate the man I’ve become.
Pope’s right, I need to get right with myself. Fuck Melissa for having to try and protect her brother. She knew he was a dead man after he went after Cas, yet she still went to her death believing she could help him.
We could’ve had such a different life together. Instead, I’m here and she’s not.
Swinging the bathroom door open, I strut into the bar and push my way through the crowds of brothers. I don’t stop until I see Shannon standing over by the pool table, talking with another club girl.
“Hey, can I have a word?”
I don’t miss her snarky glance at me before she ends her conversation and gives me her whole attention.
“What do you want?”
“I want to say sorry, I shouldn’t have spoken to you like I did.”
“Have I done something to make you think you could get away with it?”
I refrain from rolling my eyes at her and step forward. Running my fingers down her arm, I see the moment she melts at my touch.
“Come on, let’s go up to my room, I’ll make it up to you.”
Hopefully, a night with her will distract me and tire me out so I can sleep without having a nightmare.
She doesn’t hesitate and clings to my arm as we head up the stairs. I’m not interested in the string of strippers that have just arrived for Ricky and lead Shannon into my room.
The door has barely shut before her dress hits the floor and she’s helping me out of my cut. Wrapping her arms around my neck, she leans up on her tiptoes and claims my mouth. I barely have to do a thing.
Lifting her up, she hardly weighs a thing as I carry her across the room and lay her down on the bed. Her hands are everywhere on me, undoing my belt, lifting my tee up and then I hear, “Do you like fucking the dead, Dexter?”
I still and close my eyes and open them again.
“Did you say something?”
“I said, do you like that?”
“Like what?”