“Fuck, Shel,” he moaned.
Then, he wrapped one arm around her waist and really started to move. In and out, his hips bumped up against her ass with every forward stroke. As he leaned down, he growled in her ear.
“Nothing ever feels as good as being buried deep inside you while your hot little pussy squeezes me every time something excites you.”
Shelly clenched, and Josh cursed.
“Apparently, you like it when I talk dirty, hmm?” he murmured in her ear. “Hold on tight, Georgia. I need to get deeper.”
Shelly almost came right then.
Good God, the man has a dirty mouth on him, and she had to admit that she didn’t mind it one bit. Usually, she was the one who had to hold back, but when Josh pushed gently on the small of her back and she found herself with her cheek against the cool granite counter, she knew he was her exact match.
“Now, Josh. Oh god,” she groaned, needing completion.
She felt him flex his hips, his hands gripping hers on the counter. After three strong thrusts, he leaned down and kissed her ear gently.
Whispering, he confessed, “I knew from the very first moment that you would change me.”
He sucked her lobe and continued to move harder inside her. As her breathing quickened, she turned her head, and his mouth found hers. He kissed her hard, thrusting his tongue deep inside her mouth. As she felt him tense behind her, flexing once more, she fell apart, body and soul on his kitchen counter.
Chapter Twenty-One
July
Home was always hard to go back to. However, this time around it was excruciating for Shelly. She had opted to take the plane back for Fourth of July, and as she sat by the window looking out at the runway, she couldn’t help but think about her last email from Josh.
He was being really mysterious about where he was. She had even tried getting it out of Mason, but he merely shrugged and told her he had no idea.
Honestly, Shelly didn’t believe Mason for one moment.
Why would Josh just vanish? Well, he had his reason, but she didn’t buy that either.
Shelly,
Please stop sending me naked pictures of you during the day. I lose focus on everything around me. At least if you send them at night, I can open them in private and enjoy them one-on-one. ;)
For the millionth time, no amount of skin that you send me is going to make me tell you where I am. I told you that I am happy being alone for the time being. Plus, if I tell you where I am, I know you will turn up, and quite honestly, Georgia, I’m not there yet. That’s not to say I won’t ever be—just not yet.
As always,
Josh
He wasn’t there yet. Well, aren’t I stupid?
When he’d been ready, she had run away as quick as her legs could carry her, clinging to the insane notion that his ex-girlfriend had been a threat.
Shelly had known all along that there was no threat there. She had seen it in his eyes and heard it in his voice when he had waited to make sure she was okay the next morning after her late night out.
Every single move Josh had made proved that he cared and his feelings were real.
And what did I do? Reduced them all to one ugly word—fling.
So, really, this hopeless, unrequited infatuation she had with him was her own damn fault because now he didn’t trust her.
As the plane taxied down the runway to wait in the holding line for take-off, she recalled her own email with her anxious questions.
Maybe it was time to leave the man alone. Perhaps he did need his space, like he had said. Maybe he didn’t want her to keep emailing him with naughty snapshots.
However, as the cabin rattled and the jet engines kicked in, making the loud roaring sound signaling their imminent departure, Shelly couldn’t help but think if that were the case, then he would tell her to stop emailing altogether. Wouldn’t he?
***
Josh sat down with his laptop and a beer.
He had spent the morning down at the worksite, and he couldn’t wait to get home to open the most recent email from Man-Eater.
Yep, she had most definitely reclaimed that name.
The woman was intent on giving him a hard-on in the middle of the day. On more than a few occasions, he had been working at the site, checking his phone after he had heard it chime. Then, right there in his inbox, snapshots of the stunningly sexy doctor had appeared.
At one point, he had asked her why she had sent them through email instead of a text message, and he had to laugh at her response.
If I text it, it’s instant. If I email, you anticipate opening it. Plus, if it goes to the wrong person, then at least I have a chance of recovery. Imagine that going to Mason? Instantly?
Oh, hell no, had been Josh’s first reaction.
There was no way he wanted Mason’s eyes on that, and he was pretty sure that Lena wouldn’t want it either.
Shelly was breathtaking. As he sat down on his apartment’s shabby couch, he opened the laptop and switched it on. There, on his screen, was the most beautiful face he had ever seen.
Her eyes were almond-shaped, and the blue was so stunning in its vibrancy that it almost looked unreal. In this picture, she was looking over her naked shoulder, and her hair was disheveled all around her face. She had her phone in one hand, pointing it at the mirror. Her lips were parted, and her eyes were screaming come and get me. Damn, she’s beautiful.
He had known leaving was going to be hard, and honestly, Josh hadn’t known what to expect after that desperate moment of passion in his kitchen.
Letting her walk away that day had been the most difficult decision he had ever made, especially knowing he was still going to leave.
He’d known from the beginning the depths of his feelings, and nothing was going to sway him from giving them both the time they needed. If it was meant to be, they would find their way back to each other.
If not?Well, if not, I’m screwed.
***
As the plane touched down in Georgia, Shelly took a deep breath and looked out at the rain drizzling down the plane’s window.
What a miserable day, she thought, and then wondered if it was a precursor to her visit. She wasn’t looking forward to spending one-on-one time with her parents, and she was pretty sure her father wasn’t either, especially after her last spectacular visit.
After the plane landed, she made her way off and went through all the necessary lines and security checks. Shelly finally entered the waiting area, and immediately, she saw her father standing toward the back of the baggage claim area, leaning up against a big white column.
Shelly noticed that most women walking by had stopped to look at him. Shelly could see that he was an attractive man. She looked just like him, or so everyone told her, and for years, she had taken that as a bad thing.
However, when his eyes found hers and he smiled, she had to rethink her initial thoughts. Maybe he was looking forward to seeing me. The man looking at her with a full warm and friendly disposition was not the man she was accustomed to. This man looked relaxed and carefree. Nothing like the stressed-out rigid man she knew as her father.
Walking toward him, Shelly hefted her carry-on bag over her shoulder and watched him move forward. When he stopped, holding out a hand for her bag, she slid it off of her shoulder and gave it to him.
“Hey, Princess.”
Shelly usually resented that name from him.
He’d given her the nickname as a child, and when things had started to change for her in regard to him, well, she hadn’t wanted him to call her anything special because it had hurt too much.
So, as he stood there, holding her bright pink bag over his broad shoulder, she found herself shocked as she relented—a little bit.
“Hey.”
“How was the trip?” he asked. Turning on his heel, he led the way out to the parking garage.
“Not bad. Considering the weather, it was fairly smooth,” she stated, following beside him silently.
br /> When they got to his truck, he pulled back the bed cover to put her bag in the back, and she had an instant flash of Josh lifting her bags into his truck. That man was determined to stay in the forefront of her mind.
“So, you decided to fly this time, I see,” her father pointed out as they got into the truck and the engine rumbled, turning over.
Shelly nodded. “Yes, eleven hours in a car is only good once a year.”
“I agree. It’s a long way to drive.” He paused, and then tacked on the end, “By yourself.”
As they pulled out onto the road, the rain accompanied by a strong wind hit the windshield, making a swooshing sound.
It’s a really miserable night.
“I thought you might have brought that fellow with ya,” her father stated, and then paused. “Josh, was it?”
Shelly winced a little, not wanting to talk about it because she had a sneaking suspicion they might get into an argument.
“Yes, that was his name, but we aren’t together anymore. He moved,” she told him, effectively ending that line of conversation.
The silence in the dark cab of the truck stretched painfully.
Then, her father cleared his throat. “Look, can we talk ‘bout what happened the last time you were here?” he asked, keeping his eyes on the road.
Shelly looked over at him and tried to see the man she had idolized as a little girl—before all the teasing had begun, before the relentless rumors had followed her everywhere she went, and before her perfect image of him had been shattered.
She nodded. “Sure.”
He glanced at her quickly, and she found herself staring at her own blue eyes. They crinkled at the sides as he gave her a tight smile, and then he looked back to the wet road.
“I want to apologize to you, Shelly.”
Shelly stared at his profile, unable to say anything.
When he realized nothing was going to come out of her mouth, he continued. “For years, your mother and I had an understanding.”
“God, that is such a horrible word to use for a marriage,” Shelly told him boldly.
He nodded in agreement before pointing out, “So is using the Lord’s name in vain, but you just did.” He paused for a moment his accent slipping in here and there, as he continued, “However, you’re right. What we had wasn’t ideal for any situation, especially for a young girl growing up.”
Shelly couldn’t look at him anymore. She turned, staring out the window as the rain slid in small droplets down the pane. Her heart started to ache, and as her father’s deep voice continued, it ached a little more with each word.
“I don’t know where ya ever got the notion that I wasn’t proud of you. Your mother told me that. Truly, Shel, how could you ever think that I’m not proud of you?” He paused as though waiting for an answer.
She had nothing to give him except snarky comments like, Maybe because you never told me. Or, perhaps, because you cared more about chasing ass? However, she didn’t say anything like that. Instead, she sat silent once again, letting him continue.
“Nothing made me prouder than when you decided to go into medicine. I remember thinking you were just like me.” He paused as she turned to look at him.
“I’m nothing like you, Father,” she told him softly.
He frowned. “I know that now, but I figured that some of me had to rub off. And, Shel, honey? Maybe it was the good part?” He took a deep breath and raised a hand to run his fingers through his hair. “Maybe you are all the goodness I had in me.” Shaking his head, a baffled expression came over his face. “I was never cut out to be a husband or a father, Shel. I’m a surgeon—a man with no emotions who goes into an OR to stop someone from dying. Not a man who can walk around a park and buy ice cream with a little girl in pigtails. That was never me.”
Shelly tried to blink back her tears but knew she was failing, so instead of facing him, she continued to stare out the window and listen to his confession.
“For years, I tried to be what your mother and you needed and wanted, but, Shelly, that wasn’t me.”
“So why not leave?” Shelly finally asked, looking at him with a million questions in her eyes. “Why not pack your bags and leave us?”
He took a deep breath and reached across the truck seat to take her hand. Shelly found herself perilously close to yanking hers away, but at the last minute, she made herself keep it there.
He squeezed it and then told her, “Because I loved you both, just not the way you needed me to.”
It was Shelly’s turn now to shake her head. “I don’t understand what you’re saying to me.”
He took a deep breath and let it out on a long sigh. He let go of her hand, grasping the steering wheel. “I loved your mother as a friend, Shelly, a best friend, but not as a wife. When she got pregnant, she was so happy about you. I was terrified. I had just enrolled in medical school, and adding a baby to the mix was not going to be ideal in any scenario.”
Shelly swallowed, and then forced herself to ask, “So, you stayed because of me? Gee, that makes it so much better.”
There was silence, and then he told her, “No, Shel. I stayed for me. I couldn’t bear to leave you. Your mother kicked me out, rightfully so, when she had heard about my indiscretions. Those weeks were the longest of my life—the ones away from you, and in a sense, her, too. In the end, I begged her to let me see you, and she did with one condition.”
Shelly narrowed her eyes. “And the condition was that you didn’t break up the family?”
He nodded. “Yes, that I raise you in a good, respectable Southern way by providing you with a mother and father living happily under the same roof.”
Shelly barked out an odd sound, and she assumed it was some kind of sarcastic laugh she had resorted to. “Yeah, look how well that turned out?”
He was facing the road, and then he finally turned to her. Shelly was shocked to see tears blurring his eyes.
“It turned out horribly wrong,” he told her slowly. “Instead of raising a happy, proud, and beautiful daughter, we raised a scared, smart, stubborn, and incredibly beautiful young lady, who was embarrassed her whole life and made to feel ashamed of her own family. For that, your mother and I are truly sorry, and we hope that someday you can forgive us.”
Shelly raised a hand to her eyes, wiping tears away. “I just don’t understand where the man who took me to the park disappeared to. When did he become so quick to judge my life instead of supporting me in it?”
Her father grimaced and shook his head. “I don’t know where he went, Shel. I can only say that I probably judged you harshly in your life because I was afraid you would make the same mistakes I made in my own.”
“Being me? And Mother? We were your mistakes?” Shelly demanded.
“No, being the hurt I caused you and your mother. My own selfishness and stupidity hurt two women I respect and admire. The man who bought you ice cream by the fountain is not who I am. But, Shelly, he is the man who taught me how to love you, and he is the man you should try and love. Try to think about him and maybe eventually you’ll forgive me.”
They finally pulled up outside the house, and her father turned to her.
“I love you, and your mother and I are so very proud of you. Don’t let what we did to each other, and inadvertently you, destroy your life.”
Shelly bit her bottom lip as she turned to push open the door.
“Oh, Shelly?”
She turned back to see her father give her a lopsided smirk.
“Your brave face is still horrible.”
***
Josh was sitting, watching a baseball game, when his laptop chimed, indicating he had a message. Looking down to the toolbar, he saw it was from Georgia.
Leaning forward, he picked up the computer and put it on his lap. Reaching out, he grabbed his beer, took a swig, and read.
Georgia: Can’t sleep. You awake?
Josh settled on the couch and typed back.
Yeah, I’m awake, Ge
orgia. How goes it?
Georgia: Ugh. I’m down visiting my parents this weekend…need I say more?
Josh took a deep breath and let it out.
Wow, that must be rough on her, he thought as he put the beer down on the coffee table. Sitting back, he typed.
Horrible?
Georgia: Pretty much. Drove back from the airport with my father.
Oh boy. Josh wasn’t sure what she wanted at this stage, so he kept it light and easy, letting her make the decision to either open up or move on.
How’d that go?
Josh waited a good five minutes, and then he got her response.
Georgia: It was really sad. How is it that in the space of several months I have had my heart broken twice?
Josh leaned his head back against the chair and reread that message twice.
Why is she determined to bring me to my knees?
He wasn’t ready. His brain and his body were ready, but his heart was still telling him to tread gently. This woman had the ability, as he already knew, to break and burn him.
I broke your heart?
Josh asked like an idiot. This conversation could only move him further toward aching for her when he was trying to work out what to even do about her.
Georgia: It breaks every time I think of you.
Josh’s heart wasn’t broken right now. It was thundering in his chest. He wanted so badly to reach over and pick up the phone—to call her and hear her voice telling him all the words she was writing. Instead, he wrote back.
Mine has never quite healed.
There was a long pause, and he wondered what she would write next. He was shocked when she changed the subject.
Georgia: It’s raining here tonight. I’m sitting by my bedroom window with my laptop, watching the lightning.
Josh settled in, crossing his legs on the coffee table while he turned on some music.
Yeah? It’s raining here, too.
Georgia: Where’s here?
None of your business.
He typed, chuckling, and added a smiley face poking out its tongue.
Georgia: Damn, I thought for sure I could get you that time.