CHAPTER LVIII.
THE DEATH OF BHOOLMAKAR.
General Flathootly, with his command of 10,000 fletyemings, who wasordered to pursue and capture the ex-king Bhoolmakar, returned toCalnogor after a month's absence to report the death of KingBhoolmakar and Koshnili, together with several hundred of theirfollowers, and the capture of several thousand wayleals as prisoners.
At a special interview with the general I requested him to report thestory of his defeat of the king's troops and the death of the king.
"Well, yer majesty," said Flathootly, "Oi must first of allcongratulate you on ascendin' the throne of the inimy. It was theshmartest bit of work Oi've seen iver since Oi lift the otherwurruld."
"The troops behaved nobly," I said, "but I am all anxiety to hear howyou captured the king."
"Well, thin, yer majesty, Oi kim up to him at a place called Gapthis,about 1,500 miles from here, away beyant on the wild say-shore."
"Had he a large force with him?" I asked.
"Bedad an' he had. He had a body-guard of about 5,000 wayleals, butshure, we made short work of the flyin' sojers."
"Well, tell me exactly what happened," I said.
"Troth, an' Oi will, yer majesty; shure our flyin' sailors are darlin'fellows! We skirmished up to the inimy until we got him between us an'the say an' thin we fell to. The bloody rascals tried to spear us, an'did kill about a dozen or two of the bhoys, but we touched thim uplively wid our pitchforks, an' begorra they didn't loike that at all,at all.
"A wee red-faced captain called out that they were goin' to fight fortheir king to the last. 'How long are ye goin' to last yerself,sonny?' says Oi, an' afore the words were out of me mouth somebodylaid the wee fellow out as nate as a funeral. Well, we fell upon thimfront an' rear, as the sayin' is, an' be jabers, Oi killed a man widthe first blow.
"'Walk right into thim!' Oi shouted, an' there we wor, fightin' an'slashin' an' killin' wan another as if it wor a mere matther ofbusiness. If the king's sojers flew up, why, we flew up too, an'chased thim down ag'in. It was loike a pandemonium of fightin' cocks.
"There was a big fellow who made a slash at me wid his sword, but Oilifted him on me fork, an' he very nicely showed me the whites of hiseyes. The best part of the performance was ould Bhooly, who hadhimself in the middle of his body-guard, an', waving a toy sword,asked his kind friends to kill us.
"Well, to make a long shtory short, the inimy being very badly beaten,threw up their arms, an' we captured the entire lot, excipt about fivehundred wayleals who flew away as fast as their heels cud carry thim."
"How did the king conduct himself when captured?" I inquired.
"He came up to me, an' bowin' very nicely, offered me his sword. Hesaid he was glad to surrender to a brave gineral an' hoped Oi wouldgive him the honors of war.
"'Be jabers, Oi will that,' said Oi; 'but that'll be afther we thry yeby coort-martial. But where's Mrs. Bhooly?' says Oi.
"'Does your excellency mean her late majesty?' said Bhooly; 'if so, Oiregret to say the unhappy fate which has overtaken both myself and mycounthry prostrated her so much that she died.'
"'Well, thin,' said Oi, 'where's that other conspirator, Koshnili?'
"'Oi am here, your excellency,' said he, steppin' forward an' handin'me his sword, 'an' Oi also surrender.'
"'You do well,' said Oi, 'to give up yer sword, for it saves me thethrouble of takin' it from you.
"'An' now, me rascals,' Oi said, 'we're goin' to save the throuble oflookin' afther you by thryin' you by coort-martial. Let the coort beformed,' said Oi, 'an' bring forth the prisoners.' The king's sojerswere disarmed, an' their wings taken off, an' were assimbled in acircle undher guard. Bhooly an' Koshnili, undher a special guard,stood in the middle of the ring.
"'Now, bhoys,' said Oi, 'fair play an' no favor. Who has got a chargeagin' the prisoners?' Wid that, wan of me min stepped forward an' saidthat Bhooly an' Koshnili had organized resistance to a change ofgovernment an' religion, thereby blockin' the wheels of reform, an'furthermore had conspired to murdher, an', be jabers, did murdher, herholiness the goddess, of blessed memory, who, although alive ag'in,was undoubtedly kilt.
"When Bhooly an' Koshnili heard that the goddess was alive ag'in theirknees knocked together wid fear.
"'This is a terrible charge agin' ye both,' said Oi. 'Oi don't knowwhich offince is the greatest--killin' a dacent goddess or blockin'the wheels of reform; annyhow, the wan crime is as bad as the other.Who supports this charge?' Oi added in thunderin' tones.
"Well, ivery sojer on the spot volunteered to give evidence as to theblockin' of the wheels of reform, but nobody saw the murdhercommitted.
"'Now,' said Oi, addressin' the prisoners, 'did yez murdher thegoddess or did yez not? By yer sowls, tell the truth. Guilty or notguilty?'
"'Guilty,' said both prisoners.
"'Thin, by yer own mouths be ye condimned,' said Oi. 'The sintince ofthis coort is that ye both be beheaded on the mortal spot.'"
"I think, Flathootly," said I, "that you rather exceeded your duty inso hastily condemning the prisoners. You should have brought them toCalnogor for proper trial and execution."
"Shure, Oi knew that, but, to tell yer majesty the truth, it wudn'thave added to yer credit to have ordhered the execution of Bhooly, an'so Oi took the responsibility of the whole thing on meself. Oi madeBhooly an' Koshnili kneel down, an' a sojer tied their hands behindtheir backs. Then Oi ordhered a wayleal to behead thim wid their ownswords. Afther some hot work the heads av both murdherers rolled onthe ground."
"Why didn't you shoot them or kill them at once with your spears?"
"Oi considered it too aisy a death for thim. Oi didn't want thim todie widout knowin' they were gittin' hurt."
I forgave Flathootly his too hasty execution of the ex-king, as he hadundoubtedly saved me a very disagreeable duty, and the hasty takingoff of his ex-majesty prevented any demonstration in his favor.
I MADE BHOOLY AN' KOSHNILI KNEEL DOWN AN' A SOJER TIEDTHEIR HANDS BEHIND THEIR BACKS. THEN I ORDHERED A WAYLEAL TO BEHEADTHEM WID THEIR OWN SWORDS.]
To assure the people of my anxiety for a popular government, I issueda proclamation ordering a general election, to create a newBorodemy in place of the assembly whose members had disappeared, orwere made prisoners of war, or were dead. In thus providing for aconstitutional government, I granted the nation not only all itsancient privileges, but added new and more important measures ofpolitical liberty.
As the revenues of Atvatabar amounted to $8,000,000,000 per annum,there was no danger of myself or comrades of the _Polar King_ fallingshort of handsome revenues.
The re-establishment of the government, the reorganization of thearmy, navy, and police, together with the care of the palaces ofCalnogor and Tanje and the new ritual for the Bormidophia andEgyplosis, occupied my attention for a longer period than I at firstcontemplated. While these things were being accomplished I gave agrand public reception and royal banquet to Captain Adams and Sir JohnForbes and the officers and seamen of the ships _Mercury_ and _AuroraBorealis_, in acknowledgment of their great services to our cause. Atthe same time I did not forget to give our friends a more solid proofof my gratitude in the shape of a large bounty in gold.